How To Spice Up A Boring Life

[PandaPirate]

I had a sinus infection for three weeks and noticed a lot of odd behavior from my neighbors while I was home sick.

 

First, let me say this: My neighbor's husband is a convicted pedophile, so I don't like him to begin with.

 

These are the neighbors that

 

*use their lawn to park all their non-working cars

*use their lawn to pile up empty coke cans

*have seven dogs they allow to bark for five hours straight

*don't know how to gently close their door when coming or going, instead they SLAM it shut every time

*drives a semi and starts it up at 4AM and leaves it running for an hour before getting in it to leave

*can never get in the car and just go...they have to make a 30 minute production of getting in or out of the car

 

So, I decided to have a little fun with these jerks.

 

I got a porno magazine from my boyfriend and threw it on their front porch to see how long it would sit there.

 

It remained untouched for FOUR DAYS!!! Then, the husband comes home and says, "What the hell is this shit on our porch?" and goes inside....leaving the magazine on the ground. It was finally gone the next day.

 

Where do these kind of people come from?

[florduh]

Florida.

[Franko47]

You know, it's reassuring to know that this is a universal phenomenon. My old hood from the '90's was so filled with this kind of thing. About 40 percent of the homes were "rentals", and no one party ever stayed for more than a few months. Most of the time they were heavy drinkers, had multiple dogs and cats that were never taken care of, and did not give a shit about how much noise they generated in the early morning or late at night.

 

 

don't know how to gently close their door when coming or going, instead they SLAM it shut every time

 

Yeah, oh that brings back memories.

 

 

*drives a semi and starts it up at 4AM and leaves it running for an hour before getting in it to leave

 

 

In my hood they were mostly work vans and huge 4x4 trucks, but the principle was the same. They would even do this in the pleasant weather.

 

Due to the fact that many of these people would just tear down my street with reckless abandon (even with kids on the road), I would sometimes amuse my friends by putting on a yellow windbreaker (like the cops use) and hold a clip board and stand at the foot of my driveway. Sometimes my girlfriend would wear the same and point her hair dryer at oncoming cars. Should have seen them break hard; it was hilarious. Then they would stare grimly at us when they realized we weren't cops, but they would never say anything.

 

God, I love my new cul de sac. Got lucky with the nabes here; and only one dog per three houses that never go on barking sprees.

[Loren]

And let's not forget the screaming fights, the sound of which carries through the walls of two houses every damned Sunday morning. Let's see... could alcohol on Saturday night be involved? Say it isn't so!

[♦ Fuego ♦]

Used to live in the poor side of town. Neighbors kitty-corner to us were at each other's throats constantly. Police were there every day, sometimes when we called, other times when others would call. The female locked the door once, so the guy threw a brick through the large window. Drunken, degenerate, breeders of course, and friends with ...my next door neighbor! This guy would do nothing all day long while his black Labrador whined and barked from being fenced into a 4x4 space all day every day, then at night he'd start doing construction on his hovel. Electric saws, pounding, throwing beer cans and bottles. Eventually next door guy's wife left him and he immediately had another one to take her place (this guy's a catch!). The kitty-corner clan were evicted eventually.

 

Then there was the guy down the street that likes to rev his engine while he "works" on it. For hours every day. Then he grinds away at some metal with a rotary sander. Lets his lawn grow until the city makes him cut it or be fined. Then the kid across the street started revving his engine at 3am for a few nights in a row for an hour or two at a time. The cops made him stop after I went to visit with my shotgun in tow. (Yes, I was STUPID for doing that, and the cops let me know so. Could have ruined my whole life right there...)

 

Now we can afford to live in a very quiet gated community with lots of retired people 30 years older than us and lots of nature out back. *sigh*

[agjohnson]

I used to live in at an apartment complex that was divided into two sections, studio apartments on one side and 1&2 bedrooms on the other. When I lived in a studio, I was on the side with all of the people who were working and scraping by trying to make a living. Almost everyone was in bed by 10pm. After a year, I decided I wanted more space, so I found a roommate and moved into a 2 bedroom on the other side of the property. BIG MISTAKE! Almost no one on that side was employed, everyone was on government assistance. The police were there 3-4 times a week. Music would be blaring until 3-4 am. It was gawd awful.

 

Never did play any tricks on anyone though. Being a sex offender, he could have been arrested for the porn as many of them are not allowed to have that kind of material on their property while they are on probation.

[OpheliaGinger]

*use their lawn to park all their non-working cars

*use their lawn to pile up empty coke cans

*have seven dogs they allow to bark for five hours straight

*don't know how to gently close their door when coming or going, instead they SLAM it shut every time

*drives a semi and starts it up at 4AM and leaves it running for an hour before getting in it to leave

*can never get in the car and just go...they have to make a 30 minute production of getting in or out of the car

 

Those are what we call "Rednecks".

[PandaPirate]

I've never lived in a neighborhood like this before in my life but my boyfriend got a steal on this townhome and paid cash for it. But, I can't take it anymore and I'm going to move back on the other side of the tracks ASAP. This has been a nightmare.

[PandaPirate]

Florida.

 

No. They come from Florduh