sixoverme Posted October 13, 2005 Share Posted October 13, 2005 Well I’ve never done this before so please bear with me. I’ve posted on here a few times, but no where near the volume most of the rest of you have. To say I have read everything on here would be a lie as well, but I’m working on it. Let me start out by saying thank you. Thank you for making this site, thank you for contributing to this site, and most of all, thank you for sticking your necks out there and paving the way for the rest of us. Before I found this site, although I knew that the internet being what it is, would have something for me to use in the confirmation or refute of my personal doubts, I had no idea the wealth of information and community I would find on this site. Whether we are right or wrong, at least we are in this together. To start, I am a Church-a-ma-Gawd (Church of God) Pentecostal preacher/missionary/evangelist’s son. Not to mention an ex-Baptist Spirit Filled, Tounge Talkin’ Preachers wife’s son. I was saved before I was even born. I don’t remember my initial “conversion experience” and only vaguely do I remember my initial infilling of the Holy Spirit when I was somewhere between the ages of 5 and 7. If the doors to the church were open, I was there. Sunday morning (Sunday School, Children’s Church and then eventually regular service once I was older, not to mention multiple services if the church we were at had an early morning service and a late morning service), Sunday Night, Wednesday night, Bible study, Choir Practice, music practice, revival, prayer meetings, and any other excuse my parents had for bringing me to church. I can remember being sick on Sunday a few times and being told, “Well, if you are sick, then you need to go to church so God can heal you!” Not only was I a preacher’s kid, I was the oldest of three boys and all my parent’s parenting skills were tried out on me before being passed down (or conveniently altered) to my 2 younger brothers. I could say that my childhood was a religious hell, but I would be lying. I enjoyed my childhood for the most part, as I was oblivious to what I was being taught, accepting it for fact and thanking God I was being raised in a Christian American home. When I was 7, we moved to Honduras. When I was 8, Colombia. 10, Spain. 12, back to the US for furlough (they make missionaries come back every 4 or so years to the US, so they won’t go native). At 13 we moved to our final stop in our overseas tour, Caracas Venezuela. When I was almost 16, we moved back to the US, since my parents were becoming increasingly fearful for their children’s lives as Americans in a country on the brink of a coup d’etat. We moved to a small town called Cleveland, TN. For those of you who don’t know, Cleveland is the buckle of the Bible belt, with several different denominational world headquarters and a few regional headquarters as well. I think you get the picture that I grew up in a haze of Christian dogma and religiosity. Hell, I was 19 when I lost my virginity, and had I not gotten married, I’d still be a 29 year old virgin today in my parents eyes. I had never gotten drunk until I was over 21 and had never smoked weed until I was 24. That is how entrenched I was in this lifestyle. I could go over all the different hurts and pains unwittingly inflicted upon me by family and friends, trauma dealt to me not so unwittingly by the same. I could also tell you all these things caused me to lose faith in my God, but that would not be true. I guess you could say it all started with a prayer I made after my first real love left me. I didn’t understand what I had done to deserve the emptiness she had left me with. I was 19 and heartbroken. So I began praying the same prayer I had told many other people to pray. Ask God to reveal himself to you and he will. Several relationships, multiple beddings, a 2 year stint with binge alcoholism, an ever increasing love affair with cannabis hemp (clean and sober for a while now though, having a kid in February will make you grow up fast) and that simple oft repeated prayer going unanswered prayer led me here to this website. I can’t say my mind is completely made up yet, but I can say in the words of my favorite televangelist, “I was wrong!” Thanks for all the post, all the articles, and mostly, the truth. It’s hard to read the Bible with out looking at it with the “eyes of faith” when it has been the only way I have ever read it. This site has helped me remove those scales from my eyes, and no matter which way I ultimately turn, be that some form of deism or some form of atheism, I know that I have found a home. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doomguarder Posted October 13, 2005 Share Posted October 13, 2005 welcome and good luck on the path you are starting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ouroboros Posted October 13, 2005 Share Posted October 13, 2005 A great welcome to you 6/ME! This is truly a great site, and it's good to have you here. What the heck does Sixoverme really means??? And what the heck are you doing to that dog??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Japedo Posted October 13, 2005 Share Posted October 13, 2005 Welcome to Ex-C Six!! The only words of wisdom I have for you is.. those who claim to know the truth, are no longer looking for it. I believe seeking answers should never stop. Good luck on your journey. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sixoverme Posted October 13, 2005 Author Share Posted October 13, 2005 han, its 2 pronged...sometimes i feel like im in the 7th level of hell...hence, sixoverme...there is also a sexual double entendre...ill just say...im nin and six is.... as far as what im doing to that dog...im giving her a bath Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trashy Posted October 13, 2005 Share Posted October 13, 2005 Six - welcome to Level 8..... It would be easier for me to point out the areas where your extimony and mine are NOT the same..... Lost virginity at 16 Father was not evangelist or missionary (except for one trip to India) Raised Southern Baptist Remember my conversion experience Spirit-filled at 29 or so First weed was at 18, second time was at 26 First alcohol at 17, first drunk at 26 Only had one little brother Continued church attendance every time the doors were open until age 38 or so, with a 2-year gap from 26-28. If I may - your deconversion process sounds fairly rooted in experience and emotion - you are subject to being re-converted until you make it intellectual as well. This site is a good place to start, and there are many others. I can recommend books and sites that helped me, just shoot me a PM. Oh, and have fun here - we're a regular blast! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sixoverme Posted October 13, 2005 Author Share Posted October 13, 2005 If I may - your deconversion process sounds fairly rooted in experience and emotion - you are subject to being re-converted until you make it intellectual as well.<{POST_SNAPBACK}> eh..im over the whole experience and emotional aspect...like i said...been 10 years since ive been in denial of my lack of faith...its just in the last couple of months that i have put my lack of faith in to action and sought out answers to the questions ive had...ive gone from total believer to allegorical believer to now...eh...i can take it or leave it...im who i am...but trust me...ive studied the "word up and down for years now...and its only up until recently that i actually admitted to myself that i had a problem with the errors and contradictions and stopped saying that it all just comes down to interpretation and faith...that and i just cant stand setting foot in church...theres no way i could and not see it for what it is...hell ive been seeing it for what it is for years now...its only now that ive been able to reconcile that with my lack of faith not only in the people, but in the religion itself...and thanks for the admonition Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kryten Posted October 13, 2005 Share Posted October 13, 2005 Welcome Six! Glad to have you here. I encourage you to keep reading and studying what you weren't allowed to know as a Christian. The more you know the more confidence you will have. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
♦ nivek ♦ Posted October 13, 2005 Share Posted October 13, 2005 Heya Daniel... Welcome to ExC. Great place to be. Hope you can use Dave's House to find some breathing room and a bit more direction. kevinL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trashy Posted October 13, 2005 Share Posted October 13, 2005 eh..im over the whole experience and emotional aspect...like i said...been 10 years since ive been in denial of my lack of faith...its just in the last couple of months that i have put my lack of faith in to action and sought out answers to the questions ive had...ive gone from total believer to allegorical believer to now...eh...i can take it or leave it...im who i am...but trust me...ive studied the "word up and down for years now...and its only up until recently that i actually admitted to myself that i had a problem with the errors and contradictions and stopped saying that it all just comes down to interpretation and faith...that and i just cant stand setting foot in church...theres no way i could and not see it for what it is...hell ive been seeing it for what it is for years now...its only now that ive been able to reconcile that with my lack of faith not only in the people, but in the religion itself...and thanks for the admonition That is very good to know! Didn't intend to 'admonish' you though..... BTW, I have always heard those phrases more like "OhComeAndTieMyBowTie and OhHereSheComesOnAHondaaaaaa" classics Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admin webmdave Posted October 13, 2005 Admin Share Posted October 13, 2005 Welcome to the site 6... This place was made for people like us. Enjoy! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
specs appeal Posted October 13, 2005 Share Posted October 13, 2005 Hello and welcome!! BTW, I have always heard those phrases more like "OhComeAndTieMyBowTie and OhHereSheComesOnAHondaaaaaa" classics <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Haha, I got a kick out of that, and the title of this thread. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest aexapo Posted October 14, 2005 Share Posted October 14, 2005 Thanks for all the post, all the articles, and mostly, the truth. It’s hard to read the Bible with out looking at it with the “eyes of faith” when it has been the only way I have ever read it. This site has helped me remove those scales from my eyes, and no matter which way I ultimately turn, be that some form of deism or some form of atheism, I know that I have found a home. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Praise Satan! We got another spirit-filled one! Sorry . . . couldn't resist. Welcome, fellow ex-pentecostal! I once tickled the ivories at my local Plenty-caustic church . . . and if you think yours was bad, mine was ONE-NESS!!! It's interesting that you mentioned the "eyes of faith" -- that's exactly what it is, or more like the eyeglasses of faith . . . something that interprets the world to match the teachings of our church. You're pulling the glasses off now, and seeing the "real world" for the first time. Congrats. Take your time . . . my journey out of faith took ten years before I finally said to myself, "You know, I really don't think there is any kinda God . . ." I was hanging on to some sort of hope, mostly 'cause I didn't wanna die and there not be anything afterwards (that was a BIGGIE). When I finally said that, me and my ego (or id, never can remember the infantile one -- oh wait, that's ME) had a big cry, and I was over it. When I didn't need it anymore, the "faith" was gone. Think of it kinda like Neo (Matrix) going into the real world. Everything was bland, ugly, stark . . . no more promises and guarantees, but accepting reality means life without the lies (or at least, most of them). One day, you'll be standing somewhere, looking around at your fellow Christian Americans, and you'll say to yourself . . ."how in the hell was I ever that stupid." Those are CHERISHED moments!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snookums Posted October 14, 2005 Share Posted October 14, 2005 Well I’ve never done this before so please bear with me. I’ve posted on here a few times, but no where near the volume most of the rest of you have. To say I have read everything on here would be a lie as well, but I’m working on it. Let me start out by saying thank you. Thank you for making this site, thank you for contributing to this site, and most of all, thank you for sticking your necks out there and paving the way for the rest of us. Before I found this site, although I knew that the internet being what it is, would have something for me to use in the confirmation or refute of my personal doubts, I had no idea the wealth of information and community I would find on this site. Whether we are right or wrong, at least we are in this together. Thanks for all the post, all the articles, and mostly, the truth. It’s hard to read the Bible with out looking at it with the “eyes of faith” when it has been the only way I have ever read it. This site has helped me remove those scales from my eyes, and no matter which way I ultimately turn, be that some form of deism or some form of atheism, I know that I have found a home. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> I'm impressed! You sure know how to work a room. Charmed to meet to here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sixoverme Posted October 14, 2005 Author Share Posted October 14, 2005 I'm impressed! You sure know how to work a room. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> yeah...i learned from teh best...a preacher Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LloydDobler Posted October 14, 2005 Share Posted October 14, 2005 han, its 2 pronged...sometimes i feel like im in the 7th level of hell...hence, sixoverme...there is also a sexual double entendre...ill just say...im nin and six is.... as far as what im doing to that dog...im giving her a bath <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Funny, I immediately thought if there's six over you, you're six feet under. So if you feel like you're dead at times, enjoy a third meaning. And welcome. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clearview Posted October 14, 2005 Share Posted October 14, 2005 Funny, I immediately thought if there's six over you, you're six feet under. My thoughts exactly. And welcome 6/me. I floated in limbo for 10 years just as you did before I thought things through, figured things out, and walked away for good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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