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Need To Rant About My Recent Psych Appt.


Freedom from Guilt
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To clarify, I see a therapist weekly. My husband and I also go to couples counseling. On top of that, I've now seen a psychiatrist twice for meds. My GP has always rxed me depression meds (I've been on them for years) but had been asking me to see a psychiatrist. So I went. AND he's a fucking asshole!

 

When I saw him a few months ago, I was fine. I had mentally given up my religion and felt good! Since then, I've physically given up my religion and it's been VERY hard on me and my marriage. So I called a few weeks ago to tell him to either see me early or rx me meds. He would do neither, which is fine. But yesterday when I went to see him, he was such an ass. He treated me like my phone calls to ask for meds were "incredible" . I was perfectly fine last time we talked, so what could possibly be so bad now. We discussed my reasons for going to therapy and issues with deconverting and he starts to question me about whether or not I'm trying to foist my "atheistic agenda" onto my children. (OH the horrors!) And how it's perfectly fine for me to question what I believe about god but that NOT believing in god is a WIDE CHASM that he wouldn't want to cross. I tell him I don't like religion and he goes on about religion being man made but how GOD is not. And then he quantifies it by saying "many people believe He is not". Asshole! Then he wants to encourage me to "shop around" for a church that would suit me. And I told him NO THANK YOU.

 

Last time I went in, he gave me a CRAZY ASS check list on bipolar disorder and said that most clinicians were over diagnosing bipolar and if I wasn't doing this crazy ass shit, then I wasn't bipolar. THIS TIME he inserts the idea of bipolar ism into the conversation many times, I guess because I seemed so normal last time?? I've suffered from depression off and on for most of my life, before Christianity, during Christianity and after. The whole appt was just demeaning and belittling. I REALLY take issue with arrogant know it all men.

 

So far, I've been told (by three different therapists) 1. God is LOVE LOVE LOVE. and taking the children out of church will cause them unimaginable harm and confusion. (even though this church teaches weekly about hell and questions everyone's salvation, etc. 2. This is America and I can choose whatever I want to believe, but that she doesn't REALLY believe that I want to take a path without god. 3. I can believe whatever I want to believe about god, as long as I believe something about him.

 

So for right now, I'm going with #2 because at least she gives lip service to my desire to be godless.

 

And to clarify, there are no secular therapists in our area. If you do a google search for a secular therapist, NONE come up. Awesome, right?? Thank you, Bible Belt!~

 

freedom

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I'm sorry to hear that, my girlfriend has been a therapist for a number of years now and she'll be the first to tell you that her field attracts some of the worst people. Sort of like how criminals might be attracted to becoming a cop? It's definitely a field where someone with power issues or latent personality disorders would be attracted. Regardless of this man's religious views he is NOT a good therapist. He is encouraging you to do something not based on medical psychology but based on his own religious views, which means he is not a good therapist. Any of these therapists who are foisting their religious convictions on you are not good therapists. Therapy is not going to be based on them telling you to shop around for different churches or their own metaphysical claims on god, what they need to do is listen to your problems, and find a solution that is healthy and works for you. I see you are located in Texas this may be a reason why you are receiving this kind of reception. It is the equivalent of going to your doctor and them prescribing five Hail Mary's and some Holy Water.

 

Depending on your location are you able to shop around for therapists in a large metro area?

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Urgh, what an unprofessional arsehole. Therapists really shouldn't be pushing their own religious beliefs on their clients in any way.

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Hello freedom.

 

Something in your post made me want to respond. I've been in therapy for over a year now, and it's been a very positive experience for me. I've also been on several psychiatric medications for depression, and some of them were very helpful to me when I needed them. It looks like you're having a very frustrating time getting the help you need.

 

I have a few suggestions for you. First, get a new psychiatrist. If your purpose for visiting the psychiatrist is only to get the medications he can prescribe, then you should limit your discussions with him. Just talk about your emotional state, the stresses you are under, and what kind of changes you would like that are achievable through medication. Tell him that you are already seeing someone else for therapy, and you would rather leave that part of your treatment to the other therapist. Use the psychiatrist for what he is useful for: prescribing your medications, and monitoring how well you are doing on them.

 

Finding a good therapist can be hard. I went through four before I found one I could really open up to, and trust. You need someone who is on your side, but will help you look at yourself in ways that aren't always comfortable. Therapy is about change. There are things you can change, and things that you can't. You can change how you look at things. You can change your habits. You can learn to accept uncomfortable truths, and give up fantasies. You can learn to be yourself, instead of what other people want you to be. You can decide who you are willing to have in your life and who you aren't. But you can't change what other people think or do.

 

Here is a poem that my therapist keeps on her wall:

 

AUTOBIOGRAPHY IN FIVE SHORT CHAPTERS

 

Chapter I

 

I walk down the street. There is a hole in the sidewalk. I fall in. I am lost. I am helpless. It isn't my fault. It takes forever to find a way out.

 

Chapter II

 

I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend I don't see it. I fall in again. I can't believe I am in the same place. But it isn't my fault. It still takes a long time to get out.

 

Chapter III

 

I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I see it is there. I still fall in. It's a habit. My eyes are open. I know where I am. It is my fault. I get out immediately.

 

Chapter IV

 

I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I walk around it.

 

Chapter V

 

I walk down another street.

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Your therapist is an unmitigated arse. There's got to be a decent doc in your area, it's just a matter of finding one. Preaching disguised a therapy is truly despicable. Hope you find a decent doc soon. They do exist.

 

--Larry

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YUCK! You should tell that quack that instead of shopping for a new church, you're shopping for a new psychiatrist — one who has some professional integrity.

 

Then, you'll have to do it. I think it might be helpful to explain to any potential replacement why you're seeking a new therapist before you set up an appointment with them (save some time and avoid aggravation). If going through phone call after phone call to explain the reason seems too daunting, maybe you could explain it in an e-mail which you send to many potential psychs (but addressed to each separately.)

 

One more piece of advice, which I hope doesn't sound racist or bigoted but probably does: I'd try those with obviously Jewish names first since many Jews are secular rather than extremely religious -- no guarantee that they won't harbor the god delusion, but at least they might be less likely to try to foist a return to christianity on you.

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I tell him I don't like religion and he goes on about religion being man made but how GOD is not. And then he quantifies it by saying "many people believe He is not". Asshole! Then he wants to encourage me to "shop around" for a church that would suit me. And I told him NO THANK YOU.

Go back to this guy at some later date and be perfectly calm during the entire session. Reflect back on this last session and concede that he was indeed right about things. Now, you'll have to do your research ahead of time but it will pay off. Tell him that you took his advice and you started visiting churches for the sake of your children. It was hard but you did it. You shopped but you couldn't find a good "fit" anywhere. So you decided to finally pray to the one true god and see if you might finally get that answer that you never got before. And after a little more shopping you wound up in a group that was familiar, yet, not. Have a hard time describing them. I'm sure he'll be very happy for you. Until, well, it turns out you and your children are now part of a dark coven. The research you should do beforehand should include enough to pull off any terms that would be needed to be convincing. You're not so much into just the worship of nature but possibly also the "dark forces" (ie. the evil Satan) that exist among us. Don't pour it on too strong or he'll see through it but just enough since you're new to the whole thing but you know it's right for you and yours and the path you'll be taking thanks to him. You're so much happier how and were so blind before. Then end that part of the discussion as any good believer would.

 

mwc

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I definately won't be seeing him again. It's frustrating. Hopefully my GP will just fill my Rxs and if not, i'll look around for another Psych. Thanks for the replies, it's good to have a place where I can come and vent!!

 

freedom

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I had a therapist for PTSD who asked me if I believe in a higher power and I said, 'no, because I know I am the higher power because every time my wife and I make love she screams 'oh my god, oh my god!' I haven't been asked that question since.

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That is so shocking. This is someone who is paid for professional services? I can't believe it.... wow...

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I never could go to therapy even if i wanted it or needed it. I never had the money. My mom started taking anti-depressants in the 1990s and never looked back. She burned up all the equity in her house (which was paid off) with payments for anti-depressants. She goes to the psychiatrist like a crack dealer. She used to be a rational and fun person but now she's obsessed with going to church lorded over by pastors who condemn me and my brother to hell for not attending church. My mom is a wreck and going broke fast. I am convinced she is a serotonin junkie and gets her fix at church and with the anti-depressants. Any attempt for me to bring her back results in violent outbursts. She'll go totally broke soon, the house will be repossessed and then maybe all this will stop. Rather than help, psychiatry and meds have undone my mom. I don't believe in the devil, but prescription anti-depressants are pretty close.

 

Again, I couldn't afford go to a therapist even if I needed it.

 

My advice is figure out a way to get off anti's, take care of yourself, change your philosophy, get away from what poisons your life, start a revolution if you have to, stay strong and good luck.

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