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Jesus Sucks


PandaPirate
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Thanks Panda! I have had some back pain in recent years and that just made my day!

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:eek::eek::nono:

 

HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT JESUS SUCKS!!1!!!1!!!!1111!!!!

 

JESUS is LARD!! And don't you ever forget it!!

 

He literally became the shit you did that pissed Him off! Jesus magically transformed Himself into SHIT for you! He DOES NOT SUCK!! You need to get SLAVED, Sister!

 

jesusshit.jpg

 

Kryasst loves you and has a wonderful plan for your life!

 

enGeneral.jpg

 

Glory!

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Brother Jeff, I am so confused by your response to Panda Pirate. I haven't seen her for a long time and was glad to see she's still around and what you do is go and blast her for not subscribing to your Jesus Lard.

 

Last time I looked, lard was in the baking needs aisle of the grocery store. And the Jesus books were in the bookstore at the other end of town. Really, Jeff. And to top it off, you talk about bathroom stuff, to be found in yet another aisle of the grocery store. (Or, if you're totally literal, it should be flushed down the toilet and not mentioned in polite society.)

 

Or, uh, come to think of who it is that I'm talking to...Did I totally and completely misunderstand you, Brother dear?

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JESUS is LARD!!

Jesus magically transformed Himself into SHIT

But it's just so hard for us to love shitty lard.

 

mwc

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JESUS is LARD!!

Jesus magically transformed Himself into SHIT

But it's just so hard for us to love shitty lard.

 

mwc

 

Well, yeah, I guess Jesus really does suck! :shrug:

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It's like one day it hit me, these fraudsters like Joyce Meyer, et al, are simply selling packages of psychological bullshit wrapped up in theology. One day, God doesn't want you to suffer. The next day, "It's His plan for your life if your suffering and you're just not being grateful for the little things."

 

One day it's "this" and the next day it's "that." It's whatever fits their message. I'd like them to start doing messages on Psalm 44, when the Lord abandonded David and left him alone to be plundered. But WAIT! I thought the LARD had "plans to prosper me and never harm me." Tell that to Stephen or John the Baptist. Right after they were beheaded.

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  • 11 months later...
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