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blackpudd1n

Fuck God, And Jesus, And Mary, And The Holy Spirit, And Joseph...

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I am so fucking sick and tired of christians saying that with god, all things work for good. That god is infinitely wise and good, and that all things happen according to his plans and purposes. Yeah right, get fucked.

 

This afternoon I had to fucking call mental health about a friend of mine. What fucked-up kind of god would make someone that sick with schizophrenia?! Oh, it's the cross my mate has to bear, hey? Get fucked!

 

Today I saw my friend in the worst state I have ever seen him. He couldn't answer simple questions like, "are you seeing your family for christmas?" He was completely fucked up and scattered and more unwell than any other time I've ever seen him, including instances when he has been in a psych ward. Yet, apparently, god allows him to suffer in this way for some good. What fucking good? I sure as hell am not seeing any good come out of my mate's condition! How the fuck do you think it felt, having to make that call, knowing how much I hate that fucking psych ward, and say "he's really sick, I think he needs to be admitted"? It certainly did not make me feel any fucking good!

 

My mate was really fucking lost in his head, I could see he hasn't been sleeping, I could see by how gaunt his face was that he hasn't been eating, he couldn't even string a sentence together or hold onto a thought.

 

And yet, christians tell me that "god is good". GET FUCKED! If god was really fucking good, my mate would not have been in that state in the first place. If this is what the christian god considers collateral damage, then he is a PRICK! And there's no way around it: when christians hold up people like my mate as an example, point him out and say that his suffering is all just a part of "god's grand plan for our lives", what they're really saying is that my mate and his life is nothing more than collateral damage. Well you know what I say to that? Fuck you arseholes, fuck you Jesus, fuck you god, fuck you holy spirit, fuck the bible, fuck the church, fuck religion, fuck mary, joseph, the saints... Did I miss out on anyone? If so, I apologise, and here's one extra "fuck you" for anyone I missed! Why? Because my mate is more than just "collateral damage" to me. And he did nothing to deserve this shit.

 

FUCK!

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Sorry to hear about your friend. I wish there was a simple solution or an answer or an explanation.

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Thanks MM :) He's just so unwell. I really hated making that call, but he needs medication, and he was so out of it that I have trouble believing that he would even remember to take it or at what dosage. I know his dad usually keeps an eye on him, but he was telling me today he hasn't seen him in ages because he has some heart problem and can't drive anymore. I'm pretty sure that's how he got to be in this state- the stress of his dad's illness, along with him not taking his meds, and then having no-one to check in on him for a while led to his illness getting out of control. I'm pretty sure his parents normally take him to hospital when he's unwell but before he gets to this state. It just breaks my heart to see this beautiful young man lost within his own sick mind. It's not right, and it's just not fair.

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I really hated making that call, but he needs medication...

...It just breaks my heart to see this beautiful young man lost within his own sick mind. It's not right, and it's just not fair.

You are right--it is not fair.

 

Mental illness is a thief that robs people of life. You made the right call.

 

What bugs me about Christians is that they have all these pat answers that do nothing for us except (attempt to) diminish our compassion for the suffering person.

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What bugs me about Christians is that they have all these pat answers that do nothing for us except (attempt to) diminish our compassion for the suffering person.

 

That is so true, Positivist.

 

My dad put something up on Facebook the other day, because he's had a fundy annoying the shit out of him: "two hands working together will achieve more than a thousand hands clasped together in prayer in a church". I love the way Christians are always so eager to pray for you, but don't want to actually do anything to help you. The exceptions to the rule here in Oz are the Salvos and Vinnies. For all their religious stuff, at least if you go to them and say, "I'm broke, could you help me out with some food?" they will actually give you a food voucher, no strings attached. Or like when I moved into my flat and I needed something to sit on and some kitchen utensils, they organised a couple of armchairs for me and delivered them, and gave me a special docket so I could get some pots, cutlery, plates, bowls, and cooking utensils from their op shop, free of charge. I don't mind donating to them because they do actually help you out when you're in strife, with practical help. I mean, fuck, it's all good and well to pray, but it isn't going to put food on my table, now, is it?

 

It really threw me for six, though, seeing my friend like that. And you know, he was still so polite, even though he was so sick. I guess there is one thing good to come out of it all, though. When my dad walked me to my car afterwards, he said that since I've come into his life, and he's met some of my friends and learned their stories, he doesn't see mentally ill people the same way anymore. He said that he no longer sees the mentally ill as just a bunch of crazy people, and that prior to knowing me, he would have assumed that my friend was just off his face on drugs. Now he can spot someone who is unwell, and he says that even though they are very sick, he can see that there is a person inside there, just lost inside. He says that he can also recognise that there is a nice person inside a sick mind, because you catch little glimmers of them if you talk to them for long enough.

 

I'm glad I decided very early on in my illness to be open about it. My openness has given my family the freedom to be open, and because of this my dad has had two friends come out to him in the last fortnight about their own sons who live with bipolar. And I'm very happy about that, because I am aware of how isolating it can be for the family and friends of someone who lives with a mental illness. We need the support of our loved ones, but our loved ones also need support, too. They need to be able to talk openly without having their pain and frustration and everything in between belittled by people who just can't fathom what the big deal is. I am eternally grateful to my family and friends who believed in me and didn't give up on me. I've seen what happens when family give up on the person. As it is I have one friend whose family gave up on her, and now she's on borrowed time, and it's so hard to watch. And knowing that she could be doing so much better if we had a better system in place and better supports- it's just so frustrating. Anyway, I think I'll stop there, I've been venting long enough now :P All I can continue to do is speak out, and refuse to be ashamed of my own mind. :)

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I'm glad I decided very early on in my illness to be open about it.

You have an amazing attitude, blackpudd1n! It was incredibly courageous of you to be forthright about living with bipolar. Yes, there is a great deal of stigma associated with mental health issues.

 

You are an amazing person I I wish you all good things in life! smile.png

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hi blackpudd1n!

you are an exceptionally strong person! ...ooops, just read what Positivist wrote, I will not repeat...

so basically, I know few people with such problems, but neither of them can handle it so well

hope this helps a bit with the anger:

 

;)

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I understand the anger toward Christian "it's his cross to bear" bullshit and even toward nonexistent God and Jesus, but I think you should spare poor Joseph. Mary may have been a virgin, but Joseph sure got fucked.

 

I really hope your friend can be helped. I had a student with schizophrenia about ten years back, and he really went through hell. A really bright kid. But somehow they got his medication right and Wham! He gets it all together, breezes through college, gets married, gets a job at Hewlett-Packard and moves to Boise where he is surrounded by people who believe in angels named like pasta and golden plates. Poor bastard.

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gets a job at Hewlett-Packard and moves to Boise where he is surrounded by people who believe in angels named like pasta and golden plates. Poor bastard.

 

Hey now, not all of us wink.png

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gets a job at Hewlett-Packard and moves to Boise where he is surrounded by people who believe in angels named like pasta and golden plates. Poor bastard.

 

Hey now, not all of us wink.png

 

Maybe you'll meet him at the health club or something. He'll be the other guy not wearing the magic underwear.

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I'm glad I decided very early on in my illness to be open about it.

You have an amazing attitude, blackpudd1n! It was incredibly courageous of you to be forthright about living with bipolar. Yes, there is a great deal of stigma associated with mental health issues.

 

You are an amazing person I I wish you all good things in life! smile.png

 

Thanks Positivist :) I just believe that it's important to show the general population that I am just like them, I just get unwell sometimes, and when I am unwell it's not my normal self. I have found that many people want to understand, and are actually glad to have someone who is willing to talk to them about mental health issues. Until I became unwell, I never understood, either, so I don't hold it against people for their lack of understanding, I just appreciate it when they try :) I'd like to become a mental health advocate eventually. I would love to hold workshops for employers and other groups, educating people on what mental health is all about.

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hi blackpudd1n! you are an exceptionally strong person! ...ooops, just read what Positivist wrote, I will not repeat... so basically, I know few people with such problems, but neither of them can handle it so well hope this helps a bit with the anger:
;)

 

Love the video lol :)

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I understand the anger toward Christian "it's his cross to bear" bullshit and even toward nonexistent God and Jesus, but I think you should spare poor Joseph. Mary may have been a virgin, but Joseph sure got fucked. I really hope your friend can be helped. I had a student with schizophrenia about ten years back, and he really went through hell. A really bright kid. But somehow they got his medication right and Wham! He gets it all together, breezes through college, gets married, gets a job at Hewlett-Packard and moves to Boise where he is surrounded by people who believe in angels named like pasta and golden plates. Poor bastard.

 

it's amazing what the right medication will do :) I believe in medication- I see it as simply another tool in managing a condition. Some people can get by okay without it, but I'm not one of them, and I'm cool with that :) I went off my meds once, to see if I could- I decided to find out once and for all if there really was anything wrong with me. I lasted 9 weeks, and my first discovery was that there definitely WAS something wrong up there. My second discovery was that I didn't even like myself off the meds- I was one right royal bitch! lol :P I've been taking split-dose medication for nearly two years now, and I still have trouble remembering to take the morning doses. My fiancee's gotten really good at picking the days I forgot my morning dose- by the afternoon I'm either racing or moodier than 10 women with PMS :P

 

P.S.- What do you teach? I just started a uni prep course, I'm very excited to be finally going back to study :) I got behind, though, right off the bat, so I've spent the last three days doing two weeks worth of work- 2 lectures, 5 readings, and four chapters. I also set up a study system- I plan to be in front by week 5, having caught up by Monday, the beginning of Week 3. Tomorrow I have two exercises and two minor assignments to do, ready for submission on Monday. Then on Sunday we have to clean the house, because we have an inspection on Monday. I came to a crisis point where I realised I could either drop out or knuckle down and catch up. I decided not to defer either or my assignments or the inspection, because I realised that I would always have life throw me inconvenient curveballs. My course is completely online, and differs from most university courses in that each study period is only 13 weeks, and run back-to-back year-round. I like the idea of the shortened units, I think I will be able to focus better, and if I only do one subject a study period, I will still be able to get my degree in six years, instead of taking 12 years at a traditional university. I'm going to spend next year just with the one unit per study period, but I am thinking of increasing my work load after that to two units a study period in the winter months, and one unit a study period in the summer months :)

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gets a job at Hewlett-Packard and moves to Boise where he is surrounded by people who believe in angels named like pasta and golden plates. Poor bastard.
Hey now, not all of us wink.png

 

II don't understand these Boise jokes...??

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II don't understand these Boise jokes...??

 

You must not get many Mormons in the land Down Under. Not that the churches I have attended are any better than Mormons (aka Later Day Saints) but they are notorious for wearing spiritually blessed underwear.

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II don't understand these Boise jokes...??

 

You must not get many Mormons in the land Down Under. Not that the churches I have attended are any better than Mormons (aka Later Day Saints) but they are notorious for wearing spiritually blessed underwear.

 

Oh, I get it now... We have our fair share of mormons, I even have one on my facebook I keep inadvertently offending, though he never calls me on it, just removes the whole post and comments. I went ot school with him. I don't know why he doesn't just delete me- he never answers any of my questions either, nor proselytises. I don't get it.

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Hey puddin,remember to keep things in perspective,the xians are uneducated/brainwashed children that still believe in Santa Clause. The all powerful loving entity that will give their hearts desire IF they are HIS definition of GOOD.

 

Anyone that bad things things happen to just wasn't good enough,living right or hadn't accepted him.

 

This is the only way they can cope with reality and things they don't understand and can not comprehend. WE are making great strides in the understanding and treatment of illnesses of the brain,both structural and biochemical. My treatment for P.T.S.D has taken years and has turned out rather well. Part of why Dave created this site is the venting and support we share.

 

Try putting the med bottle next to your toothbrush or an item in the a.m routine...that helped me get in the habit.Hope the cats are better,I'm a cat person as well,raised mine from two days old to 11 this year and still purrin.

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Hey puddin,remember to keep things in perspective,the xians are uneducated/brainwashed children that still believe in Santa Clause. The all powerful loving entity that will give their hearts desire IF they are HIS definition of GOOD.

 

Anyone that bad things things happen to just wasn't good enough,living right or hadn't accepted him.

 

This is the only way they can cope with reality and things they don't understand and can not comprehend. WE are making great strides in the understanding and treatment of illnesses of the brain,both structural and biochemical. My treatment for P.T.S.D has taken years and has turned out rather well. Part of why Dave created this site is the venting and support we share.

 

Try putting the med bottle next to your toothbrush or an item in the a.m routine...that helped me get in the habit.Hope the cats are better,I'm a cat person as well,raised mine from two days old to 11 this year and still purrin.

 

hey HappyChef,

 

I only just saw your post- had my head in the books for the last four days, had two weeks of uni to catch up on and two assignments due tomorrow (I managed to do it- just!) Now it's 2:30am and I'm procrastinating- got to finish cleaning the flat, as we've got an inspection tomorrow unsure.png

 

I carry cut-up blister packs of tablets in my handbag, but I might start putting some next to the kettle- it's the one place I'm guaranteed to go every morning for a cuppa!

 

You know, I never really thought about how little Christianity has contributed to Science and Medicine until I read your post. Christians disparage Science and Medicine, yet they happily take advantage of any advances in those fields. Though, of course, I suppose "God" was the one who lead those heathen Scientists to those break-throughs WendyDoh.gif

 

Thanks for asking about the cats :) Stage 1 of Wednesday's elimination diet continues. Bruce would like some variety again, but unfortunately we can't feed him different food to her- I'd be able to, though I'd have a really hard time doing it, but my fiancee is a real sucker and it wouldn't take much from Wednesday for him to be giving her "just a little bit" of chicken, or fish, or... lol. Right now they're snuggled up together sleeping cloud9_99.gif

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Poor guy. I hope that he gets stabilized soon. :(

 

This is why I quit believing. There is no GOOD in creating something like schizophrenia. Even if it was some sort of an "accident" in creation like some sort of corrupt data in the software, then why hasn't God corrected it?

 

You try to confront Christians with this and they will backpeddle like HELL to get away from you while all the while trying to turn it all back on you and make it YOUR fault.

 

There is no kindness or morality in this god or his followers.

 

I think good thoughts for you and your friend. I hope medication and some rest brings him back, and I hope you get some relaxation too.

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Poor guy. I hope that he gets stabilized soon. sad.png

 

This is why I quit believing. There is no GOOD in creating something like schizophrenia. Even if it was some sort of an "accident" in creation like some sort of corrupt data in the software, then why hasn't God corrected it?

 

You try to confront Christians with this and they will backpeddle like HELL to get away from you while all the while trying to turn it all back on you and make it YOUR fault.

 

There is no kindness or morality in this god or his followers.

 

I think good thoughts for you and your friend. I hope medication and some rest brings him back, and I hope you get some relaxation too.

 

Thanks Kurari :)

 

I can't say I mind too much having bipolar- I have come to terms with it and accepted it and manage it quite well these days. My friend's main problem is that he can't accept that he is schizophrenic and needs to take his medication. So he gets unwell, goes to hospital, goes on a community treatment order for a period of time where he is ordered by the tribunal to have fortnightly injections, the order runs out, and he thinks that because he's not getting injections anymore he doesn't have to take anymore medication and he is all better. He is never on the injections for long enough to recover enough to understand that he has an illness and taking medication will help. He never quite grasps why he must take medication long-term, because he never gets well enough. And because he is compliant and not agressive and doesn't commit crimes, I don't think they can legally put him on injections longer-term. I don't like the idea of forcing him to take medication longer term, but then I kind of feel that in a way it is an abuse of his rights to not get him to a state of wellness where he can begin to take charge of his condition. I often wonder what a year or two on the injections would do, whether it would get him out of the rut he's in. I worry that he's heading towards possible long-term lock-up, like years. The longer his condition goes untreated, the longer it will take for him to recover. So in that respect, I feel that a year or two on injections with extra support and education would be far kinder than getting locked up for an even longer period of time.

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My sentiments exactly!! Fuck 'em all!! I'm really sorry about your friend.

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My sentiments exactly!! Fuck 'em all!! I'm really sorry about your friend.

 

Thanks Noumena :) I just can't fathom the christian mentality of blaming the mentally ill for their own suffering. Like seriously, how much of an arsehole do you have to be to think that way?!

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