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Goodbye Jesus

Experiencing God In A Whole New Way...


TrailBlazer

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I was watching a show on late night TV about female sex. It showed how this woman could get off just by thinking about it and she even led a class of individuals seeking to learn this technique from her. Sure enough, after several minutes the people in this class began moaning, rolling, giggling, yelling out, and carrying on about being high on their brain chemicals, etc.

 

You can read the CBS article here:

http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-504763_162-20010883-10391704.html

 

And here's where I made a hysterically ironic connection: I had seen this happen before. No, not in a new-age sex class, but I had seen it in charismatic church services among people who were "slain in the spirit". They lay prostate on the ground, began moaning in tongues, rolling, giggling, yelling out, and carrying on about being "high on the holy spirit", etc. trt19ROFLPIMP.gif

 

post-18300-0-04815200-1336710126_thumb.jpg

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It showed how this woman could get off just by thinking about it......

 

I'm just sittin' here thinkin'....

 

I'll get back to you later..GONZ9729CustomImage1539775.gif and let you know......

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I've seen that show before and I hadn't made that connection until now!

 

So now we know the truth: Charismatics suffer from God-induced orgasm.

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Hey, this isn't fair! I had the baptism, spoke in tongues, and everything, but I never got a god-induced orgasm. Maybe that shows I was never a true Christian in the first place. blush.png

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I've been "slain in the spirit" many times and while it was intoxicating, yet there hasn't been once that equated it with any thing sexual.

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Just don't spill your seed. Yah will smite that ass.

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I've seen that show before and I hadn't made that connection until now!

So now we know the truth: Charismatics suffer from God-induced orgasm.

Ah haha

 

I've been "slain in the spirit" many times and while it was intoxicating, yet there hasn't been once that equated it with any thing sexual.

I never experienced it, so you have one up on me there. I did notice there were some that went all out like what I described, but many others were seemed more chill about their experiences with the HS. Maybe the kind of O they were talking about on the show was more localized in their minds rather than their bodies? I dunno, just my random late night thoughts!

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Aah so that is what the towels I mean covers are for :D

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I've watched people in church make noises as though they were having sex and it was fucking awkward. So glad I don't go anymore. Hell, I think I've done that....I was so fucking deluded.

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I've watched people in church make noises as though they were having sex and it was fucking awkward. So glad I don't go anymore. Hell, I think I've done that....I was so fucking deluded.

 

With the emphasis on "fucking"? Heh heh.

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I've watched people in church make noises as though they were having sex and it was fucking awkward. So glad I don't go anymore. Hell, I think I've done that....I was so fucking deluded.

 

With the emphasis on "fucking"? Heh heh.

 

More or less

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It showed how this woman could get off just by thinking about it......

 

I'm just sittin' here thinkin'....

 

I'll get back to you later..GONZ9729CustomImage1539775.gif and let you know......

 

Still thinking.......6 hours later..... nothing ..Wendyshrug.gif .......must be doing something wrong......silverpenny013Hmmm.gif

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Still thinking.......6 hours later..... nothing.........must be doing something wrong......silverpenny013Hmmm.gif

 

"Just have faith"

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I've been "slain in the spirit" many times and while it was intoxicating, yet there hasn't been once that equated it with any thing sexual.

 

Hmm...god-induced "spiritual" orgasm then.

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10:30 at night....still nothin'.............blush.png

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10:30 at night....still nothin'.............blush.png

 

Think with the other hand. It's like meeting someone new.

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Just don't spill your seed. Yah will smite that ass.

 

eJesulation.

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*thinks about the LARD*

 

OooOOhhh.... Mmmm.... ooo... OOOHHHH.... Bless You, Lard! Wonderful! Counselor! Mighty OH MY GOD! YES! YES! YES! YES! THANK YOU, JESUS! BLESSED BE YOUR MAGICAL WONDER-WORKING SKY LIPS!!

 

GLORY!!

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jesusjerk1.jpg

 

Glory!

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Brother Jeff, I thought about you the other day. I was googling for parodies of Amazing Grace, and found this:

 

 

Amazing gas! How bad the smell

That saved a witch like me

I once was found, but now I'm lost

It's the just like hide-and-seek

< snipped 4 verses because I don't know if I can post the entire song due to the DMCA laws WendyDoh.gif >

 

 

When we've farted 10,000 years

And see butts lining the sun

We've no more days to sing Gas's praise

Than when it came out of our rear

 

 

sing_99.gifhappydance.gifjesus.gif

GONZ9729CustomImage1541245.gif

 

 

http://www.amiright....hnnewton0.shtml

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Posted this in another thread but srsly lol wat?

 

2qsqxsp.jpg

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jesusjerk1.jpg

 

Glory!

 

Sweet Jeeeeeeeuuuuuuusssssss Jeff!! Wendytwitch.gifeek.gif Jesus porn on Ex-c! Why...why....it's almost a turn on!!!!!!!! Wendytwitch.gifjesus.gif

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Brother Jeff, I thought about you the other day. I was googling for parodies of Amazing Grace, and found this:

 

 

Amazing gas! How bad the smell

That saved a witch like me

I once was found, but now I'm lost

It's the just like hide-and-seek

< snipped 4 verses because I don't know if I can post the entire song due to the DMCA laws WendyDoh.gif >

 

 

When we've farted 10,000 years

And see butts lining the sun

We've no more days to sing Gas's praise

Than when it came out of our rear

 

 

sing_99.gifhappydance.gifjesus.gif

GONZ9729CustomImage1541245.gif

 

 

http://www.amiright....hnnewton0.shtml

 

Hall-lay-LOOH-Yah, Sister!! FrogsToadBigGrin.gif

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jesusjerk1.jpg

 

Glory!

 

Sweet Jeeeeeeeuuuuuuusssssss Jeff!! Wendytwitch.gifeek.gif Jesus porn on Ex-c! Why...why....it's almost a turn on!!!!!!!! Wendytwitch.gifjesus.gif

 

Bless the LARD, Sister Margee! Glory!

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