Dory Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 I'm a vocalist, and said yes back when I was a christian, and I still plan on doing it, for my friend. But it's going to be so uncomfortable :/ I'm singing old worship songs with my old christian band i was in (for a year or so). I need encouragement! And survival tips because most people there still think I'm praying to good ol man in the sky. This will be my first foray back into Christendom since my deconversion 6 months ago Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackpudd1n Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 Wow, that's going to be awkward. I don't know what advice to offer you, except to maybe think of the songs in the same way we tend to view the artworks in the Sistine Chapel- nice sounding music whose words hold no intrinsic value to you, personally. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darklady Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 I agree, they are just words, think you are singing to somene (real) you love Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Positivist Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 Wow, awkward. I don't think I could do that. Can you bail? Alternately, Pudd had a good idea. Lots of singers sing all kinds of stuff they don't believe--from Catholic requiems to love songs--so maybe that's the approach to take....... Can you say no? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rocklobster Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 Good luck. If I were you I would just get the job done and be prepared to ignore some people. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lunaticheathen Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 Do it for your friend. But I'm a big supporter of keeping promises. However, if the wedding isn't too fundie, and there's a bar, that would help enormously, I'd imagine. Bon Chance! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dory Posted May 20, 2012 Author Share Posted May 20, 2012 It's not fundy, but totally awkward :/ I guess its because I've been avoiding religion like the plague, and now it's come to the wedding I'd forgot about for months. The bride knows I'm ex-c, and she's grateful that I'm singing, but it's going to be painful. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kurari Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 The best thing I can think of being a singer myself is just keep your mind on your music and not the content. You can still enjoy singing the songs and not have to give one rip about what it's about. Most of all remember that you are NOT compromising yourself or your beliefs by doing this, even though that's what it might feel like right now. You're not worshiping. You're singing for a friend and being true to yourself by keeping a promise to them. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midniterider Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 The best thing I can think of being a singer myself is just keep your mind on your music and not the content. You can still enjoy singing the songs and not have to give one rip about what it's about. Most of all remember that you are NOT compromising yourself or your beliefs by doing this, even though that's what it might feel like right now. You're not worshiping. You're singing for a friend and being true to yourself by keeping a promise to them. Just like when you go to work. You do stuff that you may not agree with but it's for a good cause. :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jdog Posted May 20, 2012 Share Posted May 20, 2012 It's not fundy, but totally awkward :/ I guess its because I've been avoiding religion like the plague, and now it's come to the wedding I'd forgot about for months. The bride knows I'm ex-c, and she's grateful that I'm singing, but it's going to be painful. It is a bit awkward for you I can imagine but at least the bride knows that you are ex-c and you don't have that added anxiety of trying to hide it from her and so yeah like everyone has said so far, you sing for her. Hey and I hope this friend is worth it. You have a talent and have the ability to sing, so what if it is silly christian music, just belt the songs out like it's your last hurrah!!! And really it will be your last hurrah to singing worship songs. Give your friend an awesome performance and be proud of yourself for getting through it. And don't forget weddings is all about tradition, just like it's tradition for a bride to wear white...and we all know that has lost its significance over the years but brides still wear white. And it's usually traditions for weddings to be in a church and hymns are sung and blah blah blah but it doesn't mean a thing to a lot of people. It's just tradition. You are just being part of an ancient tradition. Enjoy seeing all the silliness that goes on at weddings. Women eyeing other's outfits and fashion, people drinking way too much, little kids in their 'grown up' outfits. families getting together who can't stand eachother. LOL All the pretense you see going on. I like to observe people in these kinds of situations. If you find yourself having to speak with anyone from the old crowd just keep it to idle chit chat, short and sweet and avoid talking about anything you are uncomfortable with. Try and have fun if you can. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dory Posted May 20, 2012 Author Share Posted May 20, 2012 thanks jdog, i loved your comment Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoftIce Posted May 21, 2012 Share Posted May 21, 2012 I hope all the best for you. It's good that your friend knows your ex-C. If you don't mind me asking, are you still somewhat spiritual on some level? On your thingie it says "maybe..? not so sure anymore..." Would you feel less uncomfortable with new age type songs, if you could get away with it? If the group isn't fundie, how would they and your band feel about singing more... new age spiritual songs? I'd think they'd be less awkward than the old 'PRAAAAAISE TO THE LOOOOOOOWWWRD ON HIGHHHHH' type. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
secondtry Posted May 22, 2012 Share Posted May 22, 2012 hmmm. I feel for you, Dora. try to get out now if you still can. If you must do it, I guess draw inspiration from the happy couple's joy. I suspect it'll come naturally since you still plan on doing it anyways. your friends are lucky to have you. It would be nice to have 1 or two other persons who know you are exchristian for support. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
secondtry Posted May 22, 2012 Share Posted May 22, 2012 if you do do it, let us know how it goes...put on the rockstar shades and rock on! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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