Zaphod Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 So I know this isn't a GLBT forum, but you guys are the ones I've been talking with lately, and I think you can empathize since there are so many parallels between the gay closet and the ex-Christian closet. I'm starting to have people from my childhood church pop up and friend me on Facebook, people I haven't spoken to in twenty years. (Nothing dramatic, just drifted apart.) My parents no longer attend the church I grew up in, and they didn't exactly take out an ad in the local paper announcing my homosexuality when I told them. I'm 37 years old and I told my family about this whole gay thing a dozen years ago. Am I crazy for freaking out about all these people popping up who might not know? Am I being too sensitive for not wanting to upset the sweet Sunday school teachers from my youth who are now just now discovering Facebook? I guess part of me is thinking I already did my time with this whole coming-out-of-the-closet drama twelve years ago and I don't wanna have to fuck around with it all over again. Not a single friend was mean to me about it back then, even if they disagreed with my stance, but the lead-up is still a killer. Maybe I'll just put up some big notice in the Info section of my Facebook page: "WARNING: Queer content ahead. Proceed with caution." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackpudd1n Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 I'm liking the sound of the "queer content ahead" warning A long time's passed. The chances of you being the same person you were even ten years ago is minimal, so it's ludicrous to expect you to be the same person you were when you were a kid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LivingLife Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Just set up woo woo and a queers friend list. Share with all if it is general stuff and share with your Q friends those topics you wish to hide. Unsubscribing the woos will stop you seeing their stuff and visa versa w/o having to unfriend them. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Positivist Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Gawd. Facebook: destroying lives since...??? To avoid unwanted awkwardness I keep a boring profile and have no information on it (except a list of non-hyperlinked interests). No one can write on my wall either. This just helps me titrate information as appropriate as my circle of friends and acquaintances is complicated. Two of my best friends are lesbian and atheist, so I received a Facebook invitation to a GLBTQ dance; I replied affirmatively, justto thang out with my friends. However, unbeknownst to me the invitation got sent to my friends too, many of whom are fundies! Got some interesting replies.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WMDKitty Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 Look at it this way -- If they freak out and reject you, it's THEIR LOSS, not yours. So I wouldn't sweat it much. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lunaticheathen Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 I dunno, way before I got a facebook page, I gave absolutely no fucks who knew I was not only ex-christian, but a pagan of the Vodou and Kemetic varieties. Then again, I had no friends at church or in the fundie school. None of them have tried to "friend" me, and while I use the privacy settings available, most people on my list could figure out in 5 minutes I don't go to church, I'm proud of my vagina, and would punch James Dobson in his tiny dick, given a chance. Tinker with privacy settings, or just let it all hang out, and scare some old ladies. It might be entertaining. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
freeasabird Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 You should make friends with this dude named JJ Krenek. Dude's so fucking gay and atheist that no one even has a chance to say anything to the contrary before he's posting something else about LGBT or anti-religion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3DollarBill Posted June 11, 2012 Share Posted June 11, 2012 or just let it all hang out, and scare some old ladies. It might be entertaining. That. Do that. The only reason I don't is because I'm not out with my family. They're the ones I care about and don't want to cause distress. To a point, I sacrifice my integrity and individualism to spare them suffering. You do that shit for family. But old churchie friends...fuck 'em. And that's what you need to ask yourself, are these people worth your integrity? And no, it isn't "just facebook." Your fb page is important...it's an expression of who you are. You're gay, that's a part of who you are, and it would be a shame to not let your fb page show it. Also...you'll quickly learn if any of these people are your real friends or not, and that in itself is worth something. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zaphod Posted June 12, 2012 Author Share Posted June 12, 2012 Well, I remembered later that I've already been through this once three years ago when my college friends, who for the most part were in the dark, started finding me on Facebook. Because of this, I already have a ready-made note posted in Facebook that I'd forgotten about. So just now I updated my Facebook profile to include the following blurb: NOTE: If you've just found me on Facebook and we have been out of touch for more than ten years or so, you should probably read my Facebook Note labeled "Why I'm Gay." Surprise! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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