5 Things You Would Change

[mcdaddy]

Name 5 things you would change about your life, if you could go back and relive it knowing what you know now.

[openpalm45]

I would never have gone to the Christian internship I attended for a year and graduated from.

I would never have stayed at my dads, after all the shit he put me through, continuing to help him in the midst of it.

I would have been more open minded in general, and surrounded myself with more open minded people and not so many Christians (something I am working on now).

I wouldn't have gotten so angry with my mother when she divorced my dad.

I wouldn't have read all the brainwashing Christian books I did, and put so much effort into Christianity. Instead, I would have focused on making up my own mind about life, rather than being told what to believe.

[SilentLoner]

I would have insisted on learning Farsi from my mom at a young age, or learned another language in college like Farsi, Chinese or Arabic while in college.

 

Known what I wanted to do when I began college.

 

Challenged myself physically and become strong and fit from a young age.

 

Started dating earlier.

 

Been more social while I lived on campus.

[freeasabird]

Have more sex in my younger years, but in the sense of utilizing the carnal knowledge I know possess rather than the knowledge regarding religion.

 

Edit: oh crap 5 things? Ok....

 

Start running at a younger age.

 

Try out for goalie like everyone told me I should have.

 

Be a better husband to my wife earlier in our relationship.

 

Save more for a nicer house.

[sjessen]

1. I have more self-confidence now, so in high school I would have been more friendly and outgoing with people, especially boys so that I could meet different guys and possibly marry someone more compatible.
   
2. Wouldn't have spent so much time and effort on Christianity.
   
3. Would have taken a different major in college and maybe actually enjoyed my time there and found a career I enjoy. Maybe if I had a husband I was happy with and a career I enjoyed I wouldn't have gotten sick (stress activates illness). BTW, I am happier now with hubby than ever, but it has been a very painful process.
   
4. I I would have prettied myself up, found a good hair stylist, and bought decent clothes to wear in high school and college.
   
5. I spent way too much time "in my head" and on a spiritual journey. Instead, I would have been more focused on what's here and now. I wasn't involved with life, especially my own. I just kinda floated along.
   

[Positivist]

1. I would avoid fundamentalism, charismatic shit, and Word of Faith.

2. I would choose an entirely different career.

 

Those two are big enough to equal five; both have been almost impossible to recover from! :-(

[BrotherJosh]

1. I wish I hadn't gone to a Christian school all my life.

2. I wish I hadn't dicked around in college, and actually applied myself. I graduated, but I could have learned so much more.

3. I wish I had known what I know now about my parents, but at a younger age.

4. I wish I hadn't settled. Settling sucks.

5. I wish I had taken every opportunity to drink that beer, sleep with that girl, take that job, and move to somewhere else.

 

Still happy though, mistakes make who we are.

[Vigile]

Knowing what I know now?

 

1. When I was 20 yo and young girls still liked to look at me I would have gotten my ass over to Russia and hedoned it up with super models until it was out of my system.

2. When I got back, I would pursue a PhD

3. With my PhD I would secure a research position that sent me exploring the furthest reaches of the globe (something for Nat Geo would have been awesome)

4. On sabbatical, I'd stop off in Russia for some more hedonism

5. Take 10% of my paycheck and dollar cost average into a portfolio mixed with dividend paying stocks and then growth stocks like Apple and Microsoft.

[RankStranger]

1. I wouldn't have given Jesus or churchies the time of day.

 

2. I would have understood the concept of "pick your battles"- that would have saved me A LOT of trouble.

 

3. I would have realized when a girls liked me on occasion when I was younger, and wouldn't have been so clueless about the opposite sex in general.

 

4. I would have gone to college immediately after high school rather than screwing around for an extra decade or so.

 

5. I would have made less of a habit of being a dickhead.

[Vigile]

My grandfather once told me in regard to the 7th Day Ad preacher that converted his mother, if my brother and I knew then what we know now, we would have shot that son of a bitch when he rode into town on this horse and stuffed the body in the outhouse.

[sjessen]

2. I would choose an entirely different career.

 

Do you know what career you would choose now, Positivist?

[Djoker]

I would not have allowed myself to become so emotionally distraught because of my parents' divorce

I would have taken more care to not be injured all the time

I would have never believed in Christianity or any other religion

I would have gotten friends that I actually like and have things in common with, instead of the "friends" I have now

I would have tried a lot harder to be healthy

[Positivist]

2. I would choose an entirely different career.

Do you know what career you would choose now, Positivist?

I do, actually. I'm so far into this one, however, that changing has become impossible.

[sjessen]

2. I would choose an entirely different career.

Do you know what career you would choose now, Positivist?

I do, actually. I'm so far into this one, however, that changing has become impossible.

 

I think I know what I would do, but it didn't exist when I was in college. I would really enjoy going into computer tech/graphic design. But when I took a computer class in school, we used punch cards to write programs!

 

I just dabble in computers some now. It's too late for me to change too. Sometimes I still wonder what to do with my life! It is very frustrating for me. I am learning the Adobe Creative Suite, that has been a lot of fun and along the lines of stuff I enjoy doing. I just can't seem to find my niche! Argh!! I was going to devote my time and talents to biblegod. When I was doing that in the church, I felt great. Now I feel like crap. Like I have no direction or purpose. I think I need some other "higher purpose" to help fill that space that living for biblegod filled when I was a Christian.

 

I'd like to make websites. I've thought about making some sort of site where people can go to be uplifted without it being religious. Will see. I have a lot to learn yet!

 

Hope you can tolerate the path you are on now! I know how that feels.

[openpalm45]

mcd, are you going to answer your question?

[Positivist]

Now I feel like crap. Like I have no direction or purpose. I think I need some other "higher purpose" to help fill that space that living for biblegod filled when I was a Christian.

 

I'd like to make websites. I've thought about making some sort of site where people can go to be uplifted without it being religious. Will see. I have a lot to learn yet!

 

Hope you can tolerate the path you are on now! I know how that feels.

It sounds like you're getting some direction. One of my dreams is to have my own server and CMS for animal rescue groups in Canada. Animal welfare and animal rescue is so fragmented, and a CMS would help link everyone together. However, I lack the technical skills for this! I have done only basic web design/management and have recently moved all of my sites to Wordpress. I just don't have the time to learn all the new language. Every time I learned something new (like JavaScript) it became passe! Oh well. At work, I am one of the most tech-savvy people, but that doesn't say much really.

 

Have you thought of doing web design for non-profits? They would love it. I know the saying is "the need is not the call" but the non-profit boards I was on had no money to pay for design so I ended up doing it. I think there is a huge need in the non-profit sector.

 

I am tolerating my own path by getting more education. Which just goes to show that education does not make people smarter, because I have a shitload of education already and am back for more. Gawd. But it may make the whole thing more palatable.

 

I wish I was either a music composer (I do this as a hobby for live theatre) or a virologist. I like viruses. For years, it was my dream to work in a level 4 lab. Christianity derailed me com-fucking-pletely.

 

Sorry for the rant. I'm in a bad mood!

[mcdaddy]

Hehe. Here goes....

 

1. Taken college more seriously so I woulda been done with it by my mid 20s, not 30s.

 

2. Listened to my brain earlier in life when it was telling me something smelled fishy about xianity.

 

3. Stayed closer with my (gay) friend who just basically drugged and drank himself to death. If I had known how bad shape he was in I would have done everything imaginable to help.

 

4. ****unmentionable*******.

 

5. Not let a 3000 year old religion determine my sex life.

[openpalm45]

 

4. ****unmentionable*******.

Its okay, mcdaddy. God knows. Thats all that matters.

[mcdaddy]

Bwahahahhhhahaha!!!!

[sjessen]

I wish I was either a music composer (I do this as a hobby for live theatre) or a virologist. I like viruses. For years, it was my dream to work in a level 4 lab. Christianity derailed me com-fucking-pletely.

 

Sorry for the rant. I'm in a bad mood!

 

That sucks!

 

No need to be sorry. I figure that's what we're here for, to support each other in coping with how Christianity totally screwed with our lives.

 

Sorry you're in a bad mood. Wish I could wave my magic wand and make it all better!

I love that you are interested in animals! That is so cool! Here's an animal joke to cheer you up:

 

 

Q: When is a dog's tail not a tail?

 

A: When it's a-waggin'

 

 

Okay, I didn't say it was a good joke!

[Dory]

I don't regret going back to church at 15 with my mum, but I regret going at university.

 

I would have loved myself fully, not caring what gender I preferred. It would have saved me so much heartache, and medication costs!

 

I would have gotten excited about like more often, religion sucked out the fun in everything because it was all 'pre-planned' by God.

 

I would have had more nights out, stayed in touch with more people and met new ones.

 

 

I would basically be a more self-motivated, and been more comfortable with myself early one I'm not going to let it get to me, my life has finally begun and I'm going to savour every moment of it.

[Akheia]

Name 5 things you would change about your life, if you could go back and relive it knowing what you know now.

 

This is going to sound insane, but I'm not sure I could make such a list. I am who I am now because of the choices I made before. Even the mistakes led me to the place I am now, and it's generally a really, really nice place If I changed anything I'd be scared of not meeting the amazing man I share my life with, of not having the insight I feel I've gained, of not having made the friendships and decisions I made later as a result of the previous bad decisions.

 

But if I could be assured of ending up in a similarly good place later in life, with the awesome husband etc., then I'd have taken a lot more advantage of having been a willowy, pretty teenager. Youth truly is wasted on the young. I spent my hottest years practically wearing a burkha and being terrified of sex. There's a happy middle ground between the oversexualization and repressing young women, and I wouldn't mind going back and exploring it a bit. It's very true that it's not the things you actually did that you tend to regret, but the things you didn't do. I'd have gone to the college I was truly challenged by, not the state school I settled for so I could be near Evil Ex (who got super-pouty at the very idea that I might move away for school!). I never would have become a fundie, especially!