The Theory Of Evolution Has Just Been Shot Out Of The Water. Checkmate, Atheists

[Inqui]

Just recently I thought I had managed to unlearn the Creationist content my school had passed on to me. But then I started having doubts.

 

After all, evolution is just a theory - as much a belief system as Creationism as literally taught by the Book of Genesis. It is a faith-based proposition.

 

The real nail in the coffin for my vile, atheistic faith came here.

 

For those of you who can't be bothered reading (you must be scared by the Lord's divine light), the argument is as follows:

 

*Darwin himself said that if dinosaurs can be found to co-exist (or have co-existed) with humans, his theory would utterly fall apart. I'm not too sure where he said that, but someone told me.

*Godzilla and the Loch Ness monster are both dinosaurs.

*Scientists have found evidence for their existences. The ones who aren't biased by their anti-God agenda, anyway.

*Therefore dinosaurs still exist with humans.

*Darwin was wrong.

 

Furthermore, it's set to be taught in American textbooks which means it's been critiqued more thoroughly than any "science" text will ever be.

 

Checkmate, atheists. I'm ashamed to have believe the lies these "scientists" have been teaching but at least God has shown me the right way once again.

 

ED: I can't have theory in caps in the title? This forum is out to repress the truth.

[Vigile]

Yeah, ok buddy. Take your meds now.

[Inqui]

Yeah, ok buddy. Take your meds now.

If it isn't obvious that I was being sarcastic about the deathblow to Darwinist theory, the point of my original post was to show this new stuff going into Louisiana textbooks. They're saying exactly what I just pointed out, but for the fact that they're passing this stuff onto young children who will more likely than not take this stuff deathly seriously.

[JadedAtheist]

*Godzilla and the Loch Ness monster are both dinosaurs.

 

This is obviously a joke or some poor trolling attempt. Please tell me this is the case Inqui?

[Inqui]

*Godzilla and the Loch Ness monster are both dinosaurs.

 

This is obviously a joke or some poor trolling attempt. Please tell me this is the case Inqui?

 

If it isn't obvious that I was being sarcastic about the deathblow to Darwinist theory, the point of my original post was to show this new stuff going into Louisiana textbooks. They're saying exactly what I just pointed out, but for the fact that they're passing this stuff onto young children who will more likely than not take this stuff deathly seriously.

 

I should apologise for the misunderstanding. This wouldn't be the first time I say something with intent to parody and find it taken seriously, much less on the internet.

 

Again, though, this is an argument legitimately being brought up by Creationists. This should possibly be in the Rants forum and if so, I apologise once more, but the point of the thread was to bring up this new educational strategy.

[Vigile]

Yeah, ok buddy. Take your meds now.

If it isn't obvious that I was being sarcastic about the deathblow to Darwinist theory, the point of my original post was to show this new stuff going into Louisiana textbooks. They're saying exactly what I just pointed out, but for the fact that they're passing this stuff onto young children who will more likely than not take this stuff deathly seriously.

 

Glad to hear it was sarcasm. I seriously thought you were off your meds.

[Legion]

Sarcasm does not carry well, if at all, in written communication.

[Thurisaz]

Not without the fitting emoticons indeed... and even then it doesn't always work.

 

I was unsure for a while reading the OP but then decided it must be satire. Yay for being right sometimes

[JoeCoastie]

They're using Nessie as evidence? Nessie has been pretty much disproved. They've fished for it, scanned the entire lake with sonar, and on top of that the lake isn't even a large enough ecosystem to support a creature as large as Nessie. This is a remarkably desperate move and tragic that its actually going into textbooks.

[Inqui]

They're using Nessie as evidence? Nessie has been pretty much disproved. They've fished for it, scanned the entire lake with sonar, and on top of that the lake isn't even a large enough ecosystem to support a creature as large as Nessie. This is a remarkably desperate move and tragic that its actually going into textbooks.

Interestingly enough, one of the first things I thought of was

clip.

 

I remember my school using Answers in Genesis for teaching. At least those guys use facts to draw their (pre-decided) conclusions.

 

I know my premises aren't true, but they're still clean in pointing to evolution (or should that be EVILution) being fundamentally flawed. The way I see it, kids who are taught (and tested on it) are going to believe it unless they go away and verify their teachings (and honestly, how many schoolchildren do that?). That kind of thing should be worrying for those who want their children to grow up as clear thinkers and it's a shame the religiosos have had to resort to this tactic.

 

Hell, even the theists should be worried if schools are teaching that Nessie has been proven. All in the name of furthering God's most noble cause I suppose.

[Thackerie]

*Godzilla and the Loch Ness monster are both dinosaurs.

 

This is obviously a joke or some poor trolling attempt. Please tell me this is the case Inqui?

 

If it isn't obvious that I was being sarcastic about the deathblow to Darwinist theory, the point of my original post was to show this new stuff going into Louisiana textbooks. They're saying exactly what I just pointed out, but for the fact that they're passing this stuff onto young children who will more likely than not take this stuff deathly seriously.

 

I should apologise for the misunderstanding. This wouldn't be the first time I say something with intent to parody and find it taken seriously, much less on the internet.

 

Again, though, this is an argument legitimately being brought up by Creationists. This should possibly be in the Rants forum and if so, I apologise once more, but the point of the thread was to bring up this new educational strategy.

 

Pretty obviously a parody. And a damn good one, too! Thanks for posting.

[TrueFreedom]

Sarcasm does not carry well, if at all, in written communication.

 

I will try to keep that in mind when posting in this forum.

 

FYI: If any of you read my GCB OP a while back, that was intended as sarcasm as well.

[mcdaddy]

I knew it was a farce.

 

But Poes law was in full effect.

 

Yeah I can't believe they're actually using Nessie to "disprove" evolution.

 

Sheer insanity

[TrueFreedom]

Yeah I can't believe they're actually using Nessie to "disprove" evolution.

Are they actually using Nessie and Godzilla? Surely not...

[mcdaddy]

Infortunately, yes. They say Nessie is real. Idk bout gawdzilla.

[3DollarBill]

If anybody had bothered to read the link you would have known this was a quite funny parody. It's from a Scottish paper reporting on what is being taught in Louisiana religious private schools, and begins by comparing it to a South Park episode.

[Inqui]

Pretty obviously a parody. And a damn good one, too! Thanks for posting.

Cheers, I think the delivery may have gotten in the way of the content though .

 

I knew it was a farce.

 

But Poes law was in full effect.

 

Yeah I can't believe they're actually using Nessie to "disprove" evolution.

 

Sheer insanity

I had to look up Poe's law there, and I feel I should be slightly hurt at being confused for a fundamentalist!

 

But yeah, this has to be one of the more unique Creationist angles I've seen.

 

FYI: If any of you read my GCB OP a while back, that was intended as sarcasm as well.

I don't believe I have. Link?

 

If anybody had bothered to read the link you would have known this was a quite funny parody. It's from a Scottish paper reporting on what is being taught in Louisiana religious private schools, and begins by comparing it to a South Park episode.

I could be wrong, but I suspect the article may be genuine. As an aspiring journalist with a small amount of experience I've used plenty of introductions like that one. It also uses the standard inverted pyramid and, while some of the sentences could be tightened up, most of the writing has the sentence and paragraph structure of a news story on the interwebs.

 

Poe's law I suppose .

[TrueFreedom]

 

FYI: If any of you read my GCB OP a while back, that was intended as sarcasm as well.

I don't believe I have. Link?

 

 

http://www.ex-christian.net/topic/51365-gcb-undermines-liberty/

 

The show is filmed in Dallas, so a lot of the humor hits very close to home.

[Kaiser01]

Da fuck?

[Ouroboros]

This was supposed to be in the humor section, right?

 

Anyway, dinosaurs did live humans, and dinosaurs do live with us today since birds are the remnants of the dinosaur species. We ate some dino yesterday in our chicken stir fry.

[3DollarBill]

If anybody had bothered to read the link you would have known this was a quite funny parody. It's from a Scottish paper reporting on what is being taught in Louisiana religious private schools, and begins by comparing it to a South Park episode.

I could be wrong, but I suspect the article may be genuine. As an aspiring journalist with a small amount of experience I've used plenty of introductions like that one. It also uses the standard inverted pyramid and, while some of the sentences could be tightened up, most of the writing has the sentence and paragraph structure of a news story on the interwebs.

 

Poe's law I suppose .

 

*facepalm* yes the article is genuine, from an actual news organization. The author is clearly depicting the school curriculum as ridiculous.

[MagickMonkey]

Has anyone else actually hunted for good arguements for creationism/theism/etc. I'd like to once hear an arguement where I'm like "Hmmmm, I don't quite agree with their conclusions, but I can see why they believe this." Or hell, if there is even an actually convincing argument that'll change my mind, let me hear that! I know I'd be open to it. When I was 11, I was like "Evolution can't be true, but it damn sure makes a lot of sense. I can see why people believe this." But EVERY SINGLE MUTHERFUCKING ARGUMENT I've heard for creationism or any other fairytale-believed-to-be-true is SO FUCKING REDICULOUS! They all fall flat. They're all like "WTF!!! You can't see the obvious problem with your own arguement." Anyway, when I first ran across the OP, I was like, Hmmmmm.... Just maybe this will be something worth looking at. It wasn't what I was looking for, but I like the satiracle presentation.

[hereticzero]

By using Nessie in the creationist theory, everyone on this planet will know just how stupid they are, except for the few of those who bought all those Lockness monster books at the souvenire shop. Using something unprovable to try and prove the unprovable just won't cut it unless you happen to be in Woo's corner of unbelievable nothingness, in which case everything makes sense--to them. And Bill Maher was correct, the Flintstones was a documentary.

[Inqui]

By using Nessie in the creationist theory, everyone on this planet will know just how stupid they are, except for the few of those who bought all those Lockness monster books at the souvenire shop. Using something unprovable to try and prove the unprovable just won't cut it unless you happen to be in Woo's corner of unbelievable nothingness, in which case everything makes sense--to them. And Bill Maher was correct, the Flintstones was a documentary.

Yeah, that was something I did wonder. If Nessie is used as proof of creation, it won't bode well for the fundies when people start finding out how batshit crazy their books must be. Depends on how many people in Louisiana go off and do their own research I suppose.

[TheBluegrassSkeptic]

By using Nessie in the creationist theory, everyone on this planet will know just how stupid they are, except for the few of those who bought all those Lockness monster books at the souvenire shop. Using something unprovable to try and prove the unprovable just won't cut it unless you happen to be in Woo's corner of unbelievable nothingness, in which case everything makes sense--to them. And Bill Maher was correct, the Flintstones was a documentary.

Well, I can see how they are getting away with it. They aren't calling Creationism correct either. They are simply making the argument that Evolution doesn't necessarily have all its fact straight either...which they hope leads one to thinking of Creationism. Kind of like how people pick political parties to be a member of in this country.

 

With that said, I am not surprised they didn't do this sooner. Look what little information, if any facts, they teach about the War of 1812. Or what little detail they go into about the Trail of Tears. States do not have a standard to meet in their text books as far as HOW much information they give, WHAT bias they slant the information with, or WHERE they get their information from. The only standard they have is understanding the basics of Math, Reading, Writing, and governmental law. Everything else is free to mold young minds to whatever agenda you want.

 

You would think there would be a federal standard, but who wants to run a country on common sense? Would be totally counterproductive to the government's population control.