CDFree Posted June 30, 2012 Share Posted June 30, 2012 I started to walk away a few months ago as some of you know, but it was difficult to let go, I know some of you have also experienced that, but finally I can let go. I was totally honest with a Christian and he hurt me beyond belief for being honest - now I can let go with no qualms. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CDFree Posted June 30, 2012 Author Share Posted June 30, 2012 I shared my honest feelings with this person about the fact I would never go to church again, and he tried to push me, and really hurt me when I refused to follow his way. I'm sorry but I am just so so angry and hurt at the moment that I let him do that to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CDFree Posted June 30, 2012 Author Share Posted June 30, 2012 This was online. Does anyone else have online experiences? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CDFree Posted June 30, 2012 Author Share Posted June 30, 2012 The other thing is, I still believe to an extent, stupid I know, why believe in something that hurts you. How do I get rid of this belief? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
raoul Posted June 30, 2012 Share Posted June 30, 2012 This was online. Does anyone else have online experiences? Not online per se but when my experience has been that the xtians will hurt you a hell of a lot more than anyone else. This isn't a blanket statement by any stretch. Before trying to be one I was the kind of person who didn't take much crap from people who were the type A ones, especially in the corporate world. It may have held me back a bit regarding the promotion ladder but I didn't care. I was more interested in speaking truth at all times no matter what the cost was. But once I was saved by the magical baby jesus (G), after reading all of those insipid passages where we're told to submit to our elders, love one another, turn the other cheek, blah blah blah, I tried to do those things and the xtians literally walked or tried to walk all over me until I began behaving as I'd done in the corporate world. Of course many of the xtains began saying I wasn't 'saved'. LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CDFree Posted June 30, 2012 Author Share Posted June 30, 2012 Thanks for sharing. Yes I could have lied and he'd have been none the wiser, I told him that, but instead I was honest and this was how he treated me Sorry to keep going on about it, but I am just so angry at the moment. I know I'll get over it and move on, but it is raw at the moment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GardenerGal Posted June 30, 2012 Share Posted June 30, 2012 I'm sorry you were treated poorly for sharing your heart, CD Free. That sucks. Sometimes that's the price you pay for being authentic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CDFree Posted June 30, 2012 Author Share Posted June 30, 2012 Yes, and I'm sorry for the way I spoke to some people here as well the last few weeks, it really isn't me. I see now it was me trying to grip on to Christianity through the hurt and lashing out, I'm really sorry to these folks. I never thought it would be like a grieving process, but it really is. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CDFree Posted June 30, 2012 Author Share Posted June 30, 2012 How do I loose hold of the belief aspect which still has a hold of me, because to be honest it wasn't really the belief part itself which has made me an ex-C. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcdaddy Posted June 30, 2012 Share Posted June 30, 2012 You have to study so damn much that it becomes impossible , IMPOSSIBLE to take xianity seriously as any kind of reality. Learn everything you can about it, all the mythos, the early "church", te evolution of religion. All that. If you only have a couple of so-so reasons to disbelieve, the years of cumulative brainwashing will win out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GardenerGal Posted June 30, 2012 Share Posted June 30, 2012 How do I loose hold of the belief aspect which still has a hold of me, because to be honest it wasn't really the belief part itself which has made me an ex-C. Would you consider sharing your x-timony on here so we could have a better idea of what led you to this point? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CDFree Posted June 30, 2012 Author Share Posted June 30, 2012 I did , its in this sub forum somewhere. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CDFree Posted June 30, 2012 Author Share Posted June 30, 2012 It's over a few threads, search from my profile. (I thought I had written one with the full story) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjessen Posted June 30, 2012 Share Posted June 30, 2012 I shared my honest feelings with this person about the fact I would never go to church again, and he tried to push me, and really hurt me when I refused to follow his way. I'm sorry but I am just so so angry and hurt at the moment that I let him do that to me. Could this person be thinking you are just going through some doubts and that going to church will help? It is hard for Christians to fathom that their religion could be, well, basically nonsense. When someone rejects their religion it is a threat to those who still follow it and most don't know how to handle that. I agree with McDaddy, learn what you can from non-Christian sources about Christianity. You will soon realize the glaring faults that exist in religion and it will be much easier to let go. If you are like me, you will go through a difficult period of adjustment, so be prepared for that. It is not an easy transition. You can get through it though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CDFree Posted June 30, 2012 Author Share Posted June 30, 2012 I shared my honest feelings with this person about the fact I would never go to church again, and he tried to push me, and really hurt me when I refused to follow his way. I'm sorry but I am just so so angry and hurt at the moment that I let him do that to me. Could this person be thinking you are just going through some doubts and that going to church will help? I never do things by the book, lol. In all the time I have known this person from my questioning/seeker status through to True Christian™ and out the other side I have never gone to church and made it quite clear to him that I had no intention of ever going to church - he never did quite get over that despite constant reminders, LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CDFree Posted June 30, 2012 Author Share Posted June 30, 2012 I shared my honest feelings with this person about the fact I would never go to church again, and he tried to push me, and really hurt me when I refused to follow his way. I'm sorry but I am just so so angry and hurt at the moment that I let him do that to me. It is hard for Christians to fathom that their religion could be, well, basically nonsense. When someone rejects their religion it is a threat to those who still follow it and most don't know how to handle that. The thing was, I hadn't rejected his faith, far from it in fact LOL, just his and all churches in general!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spectrox Posted June 30, 2012 Share Posted June 30, 2012 The other thing is, I still believe to an extent, stupid I know, why believe in something that hurts you. How do I get rid of this belief? My advice. though I rarely give it, so treat it like a precious commodity: 1. Watch episodes of the Atheist Experience on Youtube. They're brilliant, especially Matt Dillahunty. 2. Laugh at the absurdities in The Bible such as the miracles, the talking donkey, etc. 3. Watch Monty Python's Life of Brian. 4. Undertake a Personal Development course such as Coaching or NLP. 5. Time heals - a cliche but true. It took me years and my falling away was nowhere near as bad as some have described on here. 6. Be gentle and patient with yourself Take care and happy exploring! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reprobate Posted June 30, 2012 Share Posted June 30, 2012 Welcome. It sounds like you ran into what I think of now as "christian bullies". They hid behind the bible and god and no matter where you were there always seemed to be some around. They were the folks that always had the answer. They always seemed to dominate the conversations. If something was right/wrong for them it was right/wrong for everyone. They also had no empathy for anyone else. I sure don't miss them Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CDFree Posted June 30, 2012 Author Share Posted June 30, 2012 Welcome. It sounds like you ran into what I think of now as "christian bullies". They hid behind the bible and god and no matter where you were there always seemed to be some around. They were the folks that always had the answer. They always seemed to dominate the conversations. If something was right/wrong for them it was right/wrong for everyone. They also had no empathy for anyone else. I sure don't miss them Yes, bully is the word I would use too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wndwalkr99 Posted July 1, 2012 Share Posted July 1, 2012 Better to be hated for who you are than loved for who you're not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Akheia Posted July 1, 2012 Share Posted July 1, 2012 It's completely inconceivable to me that someone could learn about Biblical history and the history of how Christianity came to domination over the West without coming to the conclusion that of all the gods in the world that humanity has worshipped, this is one of the religions that cannot, with any possibly whatsoever, be one that could have a ghost of a chance of being real. I'd sooner convert to Scientology as even the most liberal of Christian denominations at this point. Both make as much logical sense to me. The more you study it, the more it starts looking like exactly what it is: a massive con game pushed onto an easily-manipulated public by a host of control freaks with serious sexual issues. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CDFree Posted July 1, 2012 Author Share Posted July 1, 2012 Better to be hated for who you are than loved for who you're not. Very true Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midniterider Posted July 1, 2012 Share Posted July 1, 2012 How do I loose hold of the belief aspect which still has a hold of me, because to be honest it wasn't really the belief part itself which has made me an ex-C. Check this site out. Might help. Don't expect to shed yourself of the belief aspect overnight. :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shadesofgray Posted July 2, 2012 Share Posted July 2, 2012 It's tough. I'm not sure anyone ever entirely gets over it, but that's why we have places like this to get support. All I can say is to just keep at it, and try not to dwell on the bad days. At least that's what I try to do, and so far it's mostly working Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zaphod Posted July 9, 2012 Share Posted July 9, 2012 The other thing is, I still believe to an extent, stupid I know, why believe in something that hurts you. How do I get rid of this belief? Making a concerted effort to get rid of your belief sounds to me like you'd be forcing the evidence to fit your conclusion. I'm an atheist and I happen to agree with that conclusion, but proper critical thinking means not having a preconceived notion of what you think your beliefs will be once you've examined all the evidence. Don't set out to get rid of your belief. Set out to go where the evidence takes you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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