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Goodbye Jesus

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Posted

This might sound a little strange, but every week, I do my groceries with dad. It's kind of our time together, and in particularly hectic or dramatic weeks, it may be the only real time we get to just talk without being interrupted. We talk about anything and everything, joke around, and I help dad in particular with his shopping issues, which are usually to do with finding the right shampoo, moisturiser, body wash, etc (dad gets a bit confused in the personal maintenance aisles, and he'll say things like, "I've run out of goopy shit", which means that he needs some moisturiser for his hands. He wears fingerless gloves when he rides, so his hands dry out).

 

Anyway, dad and I were doing the groceries tonight, as per usual, and as we near the check out, a young bloke who was fixing some shelves greets us with a big smile and invites us to come to his checkout. So we start loading stuff, and the bloke asks us if we've got any plans for the weekend. Well, yeah, we're moving my ex out of my place, but we don't really want to go into that so we just look at each other and laugh.

 

However, not wanting to be rude, I asked the bloke if he had any plans for the weekend. He told me that he hoped the weather would be nice, so he could do his volunteer work. I asked him what he did for volunteering, and he said he was a minister, and starts explaining that he helps people learn about the bible, yada, yada, yada.

 

I looked him straight in the eye, and said, "I know exactly what a minister is. I am an ex-christian." And in that moment, I felt so proud to call myself an ex-christian. He was totally taken aback, and just stood there for a moment, mouth agape, staring at me. He simply didn't know how to respond. I finished up my transaction, smiled, and wished him a lovely weekend. When we'd walked away a little bit, dad said to me, "I don't know who walked into that, you or him!"

 

When we got back to my parents, I told mum about it. Mum said that if he tried it again, I should make a complaint. And I said, no, as far as I am concerned, it's now game on. I don't go around trying to deconvert people. But the dude was trying to proselytise at me from the fucking checkout. So now, I'm going to go out of my way to deconvert him. And that goes for any other christian who tries to convert me.

 

What I didn't expect was mum's wholehearted support of my plan. She said that anyone who goes out proselytising needs to get used to the idea that there are some people who will challenge their beliefs, and if they don't want that, to keep it to themselves. I think mum was probably annoyed at the same thing I was: once more, a christian had taken one look at dad, and decided he was a big, bad bikie in desperate need of salvation.

 

So now, it's game on for preacher boy. This checkout dude is now my favourite. I'm looking forward to next week's grocery shop!!! zDuivel7.gif

  • Like 6
Posted
:fdevil:
Posted

It's usually considered a cruelty in cats to play with their prey until they are dead.

 

zDuivel7.gif

 

Sound fun though hope you bring him over. zDuivel2.gif

Posted

It's usually considered a cruelty in cats to play with their prey until they are dead.

 

zDuivel7.gif

 

Sound fun though hope you bring him over. zDuivel2.gif

 

Bringing him over to the dark side would be an accomplishment, but I'd settle for a "oh no (can't swear, 'cause he's fundy and all), here she comes, do I run and hide or do I stand and try to convert?? Eeek!" LOL

  • Like 1
Posted

That is freaking great Pudd on so many levels! The most important one, I think, is something I've been thinking about myself since finding my home over here. When someone calls themselves an atheist, or non believer, or even an Agnostic, then the door is opened a bit for the preaching from them to begin. But when someone, like you, says she's an EX christian, I think they're a little bright enough to realize that maybe you've studied the bible or learned the same crap they have so you can't be given any 'good' news or 'new' news for that matter. You've heard it all and seen it all so there's no door to open any longer.

 

I think I'll used that title for myself from now on if asked about my religion or whatever. thanks...

  • Like 1
  • Super Moderator
Posted

 

Bringing him over to the dark side would be an accomplishment, but I'd settle for a "oh no (can't swear, 'cause he's fundy and all), here she comes, do I run and hide or do I stand and try to convert?? Eeek!" LOL

 

Yeah, sometimes just watching 'em squirm is half the fun. zDuivel7.gifzDuivel2.gifzDuivel7.gif

  • Like 1
Posted

Challenge him to a duel.

Posted

That is freaking great Pudd on so many levels! The most important one, I think, is something I've been thinking about myself since finding my home over here. When someone calls themselves an atheist, or non believer, or even an Agnostic, then the door is opened a bit for the preaching from them to begin. But when someone, like you, says she's an EX christian, I think they're a little bright enough to realize that maybe you've studied the bible or learned the same crap they have so you can't be given any 'good' news or 'new' news for that matter. You've heard it all and seen it all so there's no door to open any longer.

 

I think I'll used that title for myself from now on if asked about my religion or whatever. thanks...

 

I have no problem with calling myself an atheist. But in this situation, like you said, if I'd called myself an atheist, the assumption would be that I knew nothing about christianity. Of course, the next assumptions will be that I'm either just hurt, angry with god, didn't go to the right church, or just plain rebellious/back-slidden. In which case, I've left myself a nice opening to deal with all of those assumptions over the next few weeks, while at the same time having the kid understand that I'm not going to be an easy mark. Game on!

  • Like 1
Posted

Challenge him to a duel.

 

Only if it's a bible-throwing duel :P

Posted

Challenge him to a duel.

 

Only if it's a bible-throwing duel tongue.png

 

I just imagined a wild west showdown with Bible's in holsters. The christian dressed in white, the atheist in black. The christian goes to draw his bible but the atheist is faster. He throws the book at the christian and knocks him out cold.

  • Like 1
Posted

Challenge him to a duel.

 

Only if it's a bible-throwing duel tongue.png

 

I just imagined a wild west showdown with Bible's in holsters. The christian dressed in white, the atheist in black. The christian goes to draw his bible but the atheist is faster. He throws the book at the christian and knocks him out cold.

That's a great scenario you depicted. I was actually visualizing it while reading your note - thanks.
Posted

Wait,was he proselytising or hitting on you? Maybe, fella just needs to brush up his pick-up lines biggrin.png

Posted

That is all kinds of awesome...can't wait to hear how it goes!

Posted

blackpudd1n,

 

I know you're a veteran around here and I'm just a n00b. But when I read that you wanted to go after this guy, I cringed inside.

 

Yeah, he tried to proselytize at you. But only after you opened up the discussion. If he tries it again on his own initiative, then yeah, I can see anything from talking with his manager to telling him to f&sk off. But really, before you butt heads with him in the grocery line ... wouldn't you rather just tell him, "Not interested" and have your peace and serenity?

 

Maybe it's just me. But the world is SO full of xtian proselytizers. It seems like too much damn work to go head-to-head with ones who reach out and touch us as we go about our daily work.

Posted

blackpudd1n,

 

I know you're a veteran around here and I'm just a n00b. But when I read that you wanted to go after this guy, I cringed inside.

 

Yeah, he tried to proselytize at you. But only after you opened up the discussion. If he tries it again on his own initiative, then yeah, I can see anything from talking with his manager to telling him to f&sk off. But really, before you butt heads with him in the grocery line ... wouldn't you rather just tell him, "Not interested" and have your peace and serenity?

 

Maybe it's just me. But the world is SO full of xtian proselytizers. It seems like too much damn work to go head-to-head with ones who reach out and touch us as we go about our daily work.

 

Honestly Merry, I rarely get proselytised to. It's like maybe once a year for me. My dad, on the other hand, is like a magnet for fundies. It's like they take one look at him and imagine all the bonus points they'll get if they convert him. And I'm kind of getting sick of it.

 

Besides, making a complaint would only feed the kid's persecution complex and convince him that he's doing the right thing, preaching from the checkout. It's not going to stop him anytime soon. And I don't plan on being antagonistic- I'm not angry, and haven't been angry for quite some time. My plan is to challenge his stereotypes first, as the friendly, happy ex-c, and then work on the other stuff. :)

Posted

Wait,was he proselytising or hitting on you? Maybe, fella just needs to brush up his pick-up lines biggrin.png

 

No, I don't think I was the one he was hitting on... I did have my dad with me, after all :P

Posted

That is all kinds of awesome...can't wait to hear how it goes!

 

I'll keep you updated :)

 

My dad gets this kind of shit all the time. They take one look at him, and make all kinds of assumptions about him. Thing is, though, my parents raised four of their own kids, fostered another 25, three of whom they had for 12 years, which is a major feat in foster care, they unofficially adopted me and another girl, and while I am the most recent, I won't be the last; not only that, but dad rarely drinks, has never touched a drug or cigarette in his life, and has the kindest heart of anyone you'll ever meet. So just because he has hair longer than I do, chops, rides a Harley, and practically wears a uniform of jeans, black shirt, leather boots, and leather vest, he has never worn a patch, and the club he is president of is a social riding group whom actually raise money for charities. So yeah, they really need to stop judging books by their covers.

Posted

That is freaking great Pudd on so many levels! The most important one, I think, is something I've been thinking about myself since finding my home over here. When someone calls

themselves an atheist, or non believer, or even

an Agnostic, then the door is opened a bit for

the preaching from them to begin. But when

someone, like you, says she's an EX christian, I

think they're a little bright enough to realize that

maybe you've studied the bible or learned the

same crap they have so you can't be given any

'good' news or 'new' news for that matter. You've

heard it all and seen it all so there's no door to

open any longer.

 

I think I'll used that title for myself from now on if asked about my religion or whatever. thanks...

 

That works if you know you're talking to an Xian. But someday I would love to stop associating myself with Xianity altogether, pretend I never was Xian. I can just be an agnostic. It would be nice to let it go at some point.

Posted

That works if you know you're talking to an Xian. But someday I would love to stop associating myself with Xianity altogether, pretend I never was Xian. I can just be an agnostic. It would be nice to let it go at some point.

 

You'll get there eventually, Lilith :) I do prefer to call myself an atheist, because I am very proud to be an atheist. Becoming an atheist is my greatest achievement in life, and I don't think anything I ever do will quite compare, simply because I was such a fundamentalist, and so thoroughly brainwashed, and I thought my own way out of that. I don't care how much any christian ever wishes to disparage me for being an atheist; I will never be ashamed of my atheism :)

  • Like 2
Posted

Hi Pudd

 

When the guy asked you if you knew what a minister was, he crossed the line in to proselytising (as well as being patronising). If he works for Woolies, you might like to challenge him on the morality of working for an employer that makes lots of money out of the misery of poker machine addiction.

 

There is grounds for official complaint here. Given the economy, a supermarket can easily find another check out chick. This sort of talk would be par for the course in the US, but is definitely out of order in Australia.

Posted

Challenge him to a duel.

 

Only if it's a bible-throwing duel tongue.png

 

I just imagined a wild west showdown with Bible's in holsters. The christian dressed in white, the atheist in black. The christian goes to draw his bible but the atheist is faster. He throws the book at the christian and knocks him out cold.

 

I was suddenly imagining the atheist tearing a single page out of the book and using it like a throwing star, hurling towards the xian and slicing off his head in one shot. Game, set, match!

  • Like 1
Posted

Hi Pudd

 

When the guy asked you if you knew what a minister was, he crossed the line in to proselytising (as well as being patronising). If he works for Woolies, you might like to challenge him on the morality of working for an employer that makes lots of money out of the misery of poker machine addiction.

 

There is grounds for official complaint here. Given the economy, a supermarket can easily find another check out chick. This sort of talk would be par for the course in the US, but is definitely out of order in Australia.

 

Well, now you've put me in a spot, Blue. You raise a really valid point. To me, it's more of a fun mental challenge than anything else. But it really isn't appropriate for him to be using his job as an excuse to evangelise. I'm going to have more of a think about this before I decide which way to proceed, because I can think of a number of different options. Hmmm.

Posted

Always glad to stir the pot on both sides!! lol

  • Like 1
Posted

But someday I would love to stop associating myself with Xianity altogether, pretend I never was Xian. I can just be an agnostic. It would be nice to let it go at some point.

You're right about that - I'm still working on that - going back to when I was never even aware of one bible verse and all the rest that goes with it. Life was a heck of a lot better and simpler, at least for me.
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