Severing The Final Threads Of Belief

[Dory]

I stopped believing months ago, after finally having enough in January..

 

I don't believe, and have been through hell and back with this damned religion, but part of me still wishes there to be something. I know its fruitless and I've been hurt way too much to ever return to Christianity (or any religion) but I feel like I'm in the final stages of being fully free. I just need something, an anchor of sorts, whether its a different perspective or way of thinking about life, to fill the hole..

 

I may have posted something like this before, months ago, but I'm more of a watcher than a poster here (You guys keep me sane!)

 

I'm having some therapy for anxiety, left over from the last shitty few years, so it'll be nice to rant in that, but I just want to let it all go now and start thinking about other things... not to do with the meaning of life, death, or noodly appendages... jk.

 

thoughts appreciated.

[raoul]

I stopped believing months ago, after finally having enough in January..

 

I don't believe, and have been through hell and back with this damned religion, but part of me still wishes there to be something. I know its fruitless and I've been hurt way too much to ever return to Christianity (or any religion) but I feel like I'm in the final stages of being fully free. I just need something, an anchor of sorts, whether its a different perspective or way of thinking about life, to fill the hole..

 

I may have posted something like this before, months ago, but I'm more of a watcher than a poster here (You guys keep me sane!)

 

I'm having some therapy for anxiety, left over from the last shitty few years, so it'll be nice to rant in that, but I just want to let it all go now and start thinking about other things... not to do with the meaning of life, death, or noodly appendages... jk.

 

thoughts appreciated.

With me as was probably the case with most xtians, the fear of the unknown and/or death caused me to make the leap from a belief of an intelligence to the xtian model. It seemed to have been the best out of all of the rest from a philosophical standpoint I suppose. However, that fear of the unknown was always lurking at least subconsciously for me without my having the intellectual honesty to admit it to anyone, especially atheists whom I debated in the past. I would get angry when one of them would suggest this as the primary motive for people believing in the first place. I guess I knew, at least deep down inside, that they were telling the truth.

 

Anyway, years later (now) I've come to realize that it doesn't matter any longer. Death is merely another stage in our lives - another plateau of sorts. I also realized that throughout my entire life I rejected fear in all other aspects of the journey so why accept it for a belief system? Another caveat was when I watched a YouTube video in which the person demonstrated how the heaven as depicted in the bible and by believers is actually a version of a hell with its endless and neverending mantra of worshipping a god, bowing down, singing all day, et. al.

 

But the incredibly logical and very plausible thing he said was at the end of the video. He said (not a direct quote - just from my memory) "You didn't exist for billions of years prior to being born and you weren't harmed by this fact. So why do you think if you simply stop existing, it would be harmful for you?"

 

I nodded in agreement, gave out a big smile, and have moved on. Never looked back.

[wndwalkr99]

Lots of us wish there was something out there, something more. An anchor, as you put it, is an excellent description.

 

There isn't one anchor - this is life is what you make of it and if you need strength you may draw it from wherever you please.

 

That is one of life's great disappointments, but it is what it is.

 

I think the need for this anchor is something that Christianity (not solely, but in this context) conditions people to believe they need - your religious conditioning has caused you to sense a "hole" as you aptly describe it, where in fact there is none. You are complete all on your own.

 

Having been an atheist for as long as I can remember (I was raised as a nominal Episcopalian, in the sense that if someone asked me what religion I was, that was what I was supposed to tell them), I cannot imagine needing any such thing. I am usually asked about that when someone finds out I am an atheist, but honestly, truly, there is no hole there.

 

Your life is what you make of it. Luck plays a smaller role than most people imagine, especially once you are too longer sitting around bemoaning any of several diappointments such as the fact that there is no universal anchor. If you needed one, make one. And get on with life! You may consider this a swift kick in the ass ;-)

[freeasabird]

I just need something, an anchor of sorts, whether its a different perspective or way of thinking about life, to fill the hole..

 

.....

 

 

I'm having some therapy for anxiety, left over from the last shitty few years,

 

Just keep swimming Dory. Just keep swimming.

[silentknight]

Except for when I was a small child, I've never really been concerned with the afterlife. My thoughts have always pretty much been "I can't know what comes after death, so I shouldn't worry about it". Even when I was "christian" I didn't think much about heaven and hell. I don't think I ever really believed in them when I was old enough to think rationally. This made letting go of religion pretty easy.. personally. The hard part for me has been relationships. There are many people I consider pretty essential to my life that are christians through and through.

[Lilith666]

I know what you mean. Sometimes I still feel a bit lost without a belief system to promise eternity in Heaven.

 

I don't know if this would make you feel better, and maybe it's a little cheesy, but here's my theory: the world seems like there is intelligent

design involved, but we know there can't be an

omnipotent, omniscient, benevolent god because

the world is all messed up. So a god created

the world, but then got bored and forgot about

us. Fortunately, he created angels, who created

a lovely afterlife for worthy dead people. The

bad apples do penance until they get reformed.

Well, the angels are nice, and they do try to fix things, but they aren't all-powerful or all-knowing, and that's why the world isn't perfect.

 

I'll just hang on to that for the rest of my life. It's better than nothing, I guess.

[Kaiser01]

Its good your recovering ok, seems like alot of people never really are able to, at least not fully.

[Lilith666]

@raoul: Good point. But before we were born, we had no clue how cool life is. We didn't have friends, we had never eaten ice cream or barbecue or ridden a roller coaster. So nobody really wants to lose all that. The idea of being brain-dead forever is horrible.

[Dory]

thanks for replies. tbh, the death thing doesn't really freak me out too much, at this moment anyway. I've just been through a lot and am probably still hurting a lot more than I want to realise, I've been in dark places I never want to go again and thought the religion was keeping me together, when in fact it was tearing me apart. But you're probably right about it all being us in the end.. we've always been complete (no holes to speak of really!)

 

I have a tendency for deep philosophical ruminations... especially early in a morning.. or while having a bath. The point/meaning of life is one of those thoughts.

 

And I'll keep swimming! Dory's gotto keep swimming...

[LifeCycle]

I know what you mean. Sometimes I still feel a bit lost without a belief system to promise eternity in Heaven.

 

I don't know if this would make you feel better, and maybe it's a little cheesy, but here's my theory: the world seems like there is intelligent design involved, but we know there can't be an omnipotent, omniscient, benevolent god because the world is all messed up. So a god created the world, but then got bored and forgot about us. Fortunately, he created angels, who created a lovely afterlife for worthy dead people. The bad apples do penance until they get reformed. Well, the angels are nice, but they aren't all-powerful or all-knowing, and that's why the world isn't perfect.

 

I'll just hang on to that for the rest of my life. It's better than nothing, I guess.

 

I too believe there is too much order in the universe and in our little corner of the galaxy here to think "chance" is the god that formed the livable earth.

 

There are many theories out there supported by top scientists that state there are more dimensions than we can even observe. Somewhere around 11 or so. We live in 3 (or 4 if you consider time). So, what's going on in the other dimensions? We can't even see them, hear them, smell them, feel them or measure or test them. We don't know.

 

If there's one thing you can absolutely, surly know in this life, it's that there is vastly so much more we do not know than we do know. It opens up so many possibilities you could ponder them forever. Also, one thing here... Atheism states there is no deity, not that there is no afterlife. You can be an atheist and believe there is something more... Many do. They're just honest with themselves... We can't observe that world so we don't know that it's there just as we don't know that it's not there.

 

Hold out hope. Many of us do. I just stopped believing in the god of bible and him having the monopoly on the afterlife. Keep searching. Anything is possible and you may find a greater possibility than the one lined out in the bible. =)

[raoul]

@raoul: Good point. But before we were born, we had no clue how cool life is. We didn't have friends, we had never eaten ice cream or barbecue or ridden a roller coaster. So nobody really wants to lose all that. The idea of being brain-dead forever is horrible.

Which is it? Did I make a good point or is it horrible to contemplate nothingness? LOL

 

Seriously though, If you're actually brain dead, how can it be horrible since you won't know in the first place? Of course you're referring to the concept of an 'idea' about it. I can posit quite a few other 'ideas' that would be equally or even more horrible than that one. The point of course is that an idea is simply that and nothing more.

 

In concession to you however I do admit to thinking about it and scaring myself alot about it until I realized, one day, it wouldn't matter because I wouidn't be conscious and without a thinking brain it wouldn't matter. Since then I don't even think about it at all.