Kateastrophy Posted September 20, 2012 Share Posted September 20, 2012 Part of my reason for leaving Xianity is because people say some of the most asinine things to you. Some examples: DH and I were having marital issues, mostly because he refused to even consider my feelings about something very important. I went to what I felt was a strong woman with a good marriage for advice. She said, "You just have to let him do what he's going to do and rest in the joy of the Lord." (No, I did not follow this advice. AYFKM?!) Recently, on facebook, I disagreed with someone who said that if you are a XIan you have to vote for the GOP. I explained why. She said that I should "pray about it and God will let you know the right thing to do." Oh, the right thing to do? You mean vote exactly as you do because your opinion can't possibly wrong? *eyeroll* When we were experiencing infertility: "Maybe God doesn't want you to be parents." (So now we're not good enough to be parents? But a 14 y-o- crack whore is? Yeah that makes sense) "It will happen in God's time." (shutyourfacethatsnothowitworks) "Maybe God wants you to invest your time into other people's kids through teaching or being the really cool aunt." Yeah. Yeah I'm sure that provides the same joy as having your own kids. Contribute. I know ya'll have plenty of stuff on this topic! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator TrueFreedom Posted September 20, 2012 Moderator Share Posted September 20, 2012 All that they have is bronze age mythology to base their advice on. On disagreements, I hope that you both allow for them and learn a healthy way to compromise. As for kids, I'm sorry that you've had a hard time with that. One slip, and we've always managed to conceive, resulting in all of the "blessings" and misery that children tend to bring (we love them all). If I had it to do again, I would have adopted, or at least fostered. There are so many suffering orphans in the world. You seem to have a good head on your shoulders. :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kateastrophy Posted September 20, 2012 Author Share Posted September 20, 2012 All that they have is bronze age mythology to base their advice on. On disagreements, I hope that you both allow for them and learn a healthy way to compromise. As for kids, I'm sorry that you've had a hard time with that. One slip, and we've always managed to conceive, resulting in all of the "blessings" and misery that children tend to bring (we love them all). If I had it to do again, I would have adopted, or at least fostered. There are so many suffering orphans in the world. You seem to have a good head on your shoulders. :-) NBD about the kids. We don't want them anymore now that I am free from the Xian pressure to be a Xian baby factory and submissive wife. And yes, we always work out our disagreements mutually, which is why that bit of advice was like a slap in the face. As if I'm going to just let my DH do something completely selfish and destructive just because "he's the man." PUH-LEASE! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roadrunner Posted September 20, 2012 Share Posted September 20, 2012 I find now I have no clue what to say to people in a tough time. I hid behind the bible for so long I don't have much real advice other than a willingness to listen which seems to be pretty effective. That's the funny thing about xianity. It doesn't matter the circumstance if its something god said than its relevant and can be played like a trump card regardless of the situation and you can't dispute it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator TrueFreedom Posted September 20, 2012 Moderator Share Posted September 20, 2012 Still some good advice in those pages though. Weep with those who weep. Rejoice with those who rejoice. Common sense, but reassurance that it's the right thing to do. Treat others as you would want to be treated, and live in community, basically. Peace, love, and understanding... Hippies unite! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 20, 2012 Share Posted September 20, 2012 Once I hit puberty I had a hard time making logical sense of the bible stories, and it got me in a lot of trouble in my classes for just asking honest questions. They were the unanswerable questions that had the potential to subvert the faith of other kids. I was told on many occasions that "the devil can fool you with logic..." I tried to use this to get out of doing math, but for some reason, it only applied to logical fallacies I found in the bible, and not to empirical, observable evidence... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silentknight Posted September 20, 2012 Share Posted September 20, 2012 At one point my wife lost her job, and we were struggling to make ends meet for a while. We weren't going to tithe, and her mother said "You have to Tithe. Whenever I have money trouble I keep tithing and God makes sure it works out" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ninj Posted September 20, 2012 Share Posted September 20, 2012 I still remember the advice I got from a few church-goers when I just got hired on at my current job at Boeing on 2nd shift. "If God doesn't put you on 1st shift within 3 weeks, quit your job, otherwise you'll miss church." Needless to say, I ended up quitting the church. It was one of my wiser decisions. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
antix Posted September 20, 2012 Share Posted September 20, 2012 I find now I have no clue what to say to people in a tough time. I hid behind the bible for so long I don't have much real advice other than a willingness to listen which seems to be pretty effective. That's the funny thing about xianity. It doesn't matter the circumstance if its something god said than its relevant and can be played like a trump card regardless of the situation and you can't dispute it. Well, trust me, it is best not to say anything sometimes except I am so sorry. DEFINITELY do not say shit like "The Lord will make everything better" etc Actually, once you start to have questions and oubts, you do not want to hear "The Lord: INSERT STATEMENT" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
antix Posted September 20, 2012 Share Posted September 20, 2012 I still remember the advice I got from a few church-goers when I just got hired on at my current job at Boeing on 2nd shift. "If God doesn't put you on 1st shift within 3 weeks, quit your job, otherwise you'll miss church." Needless to say, I ended up quitting the church. It was one of my wiser decisions. Smart move. Except for a period in 87 early 88, I never was big on the church thing. I never got it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midniterider Posted September 20, 2012 Share Posted September 20, 2012 At one point my wife lost her job, and we were struggling to make ends meet for a while. We weren't going to tithe, and her mother said "You have to Tithe. Whenever I have money trouble I keep tithing and God makes sure it works out" My mother told me that while she was growing up with 4 siblings in a single parent home on welfare in the 1930s a travelling pastor said they should tithe and donate to the church. That's crazy. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
antix Posted September 20, 2012 Share Posted September 20, 2012 At one point my wife lost her job, and we were struggling to make ends meet for a while. We weren't going to tithe, and her mother said "You have to Tithe. Whenever I have money trouble I keep tithing and God makes sure it works out" My mother told me that while she was growing up with 4 siblings in a single parent home on welfare in the 1930s a travelling pastor said they should tithe and donate to the church. That's crazy. Notice it is always TITHE TO THE CHURCH How about helping the poor instead??????? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
antix Posted September 20, 2012 Share Posted September 20, 2012 < Recently, on facebook, I disagreed with someone who said that if you are a XIan you have to vote for the GOP. I explained why. She said that I should "pray about it and God will let you know the right thing to do." > That is so annoying when they say that. Or when they say: We feel the Lord is guiding us to ............................ I taught pre med at a caribbean med school yrs ago and this goofy fucker in his late 30s with 4 kids comes down and is a christian. I mentioned I was and he was saying initially how the lord guided him to the med school. 3 weeks later when he was dropping out he said the Lord was guiding him back to the states. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gamecock1973 Posted September 24, 2012 Share Posted September 24, 2012 "Everything happens for a reason." "God works all things out for good." BULLSHIT statements like this piss me off. Maybe living in the comfy confines of 1st world suburbia you can tell yourself this and it brings some false comfort in hardship, but after traveling the world and seeing unspeakable things I'm sure that a lot of SHIT happens and there is no good reason. Child rape, starvation in the 3rd world, the abduction of African children to become soldiers who are forced to rape and murder until hardened to such acts... Such statements really get me fired up, because not only are they bullshit, but they justify X'ians NOT taking practical action to stop injustice and make the world a better place. "Oh well, it must be god's will..." 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stryper Posted September 24, 2012 Share Posted September 24, 2012 Once I hit puberty I had a hard time making logical sense of the bible stories, and it got me in a lot of trouble in my classes for just asking honest questions. They were the unanswerable questions that had the potential to subvert the faith of other kids. I was told on many occasions that "the devil can fool you with logic..." I tried to use this to get out of doing math, but for some reason, it only applied to logical fallacies I found in the bible, and not to empirical, observable evidence... Ironic isn't it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TrailBlazer Posted September 24, 2012 Share Posted September 24, 2012 Xian Me: I'm seriously doubting my faith, I don't know what I should do! Trusted Xian Mentor Lady: As cliche as it sounds, just have faith. Pray about it and ask God to send you a sign to restore your faith; he will if you have enough faith. Seriously Ill Xian Me: I'm afraid I'm going to die before God ever heals me. Typical Xian Response: God is teaching you and will heal you in his "good and perfect timing". If you really trusted him, he would heal you; you don't have enough faith, be patient. Seriously Ill Xian Me again: I'm really scared and I want you to help me. Typical Xian Friend Response: But I'm praying for you!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
inorbit Posted September 24, 2012 Share Posted September 24, 2012 Xian Me: I'm seriously doubting my faith, I don't know what I should do! Trusted Xian Mentor Lady: As cliche as it sounds, just have faith. Pray about it and ask God to send you a sign to restore your faith; he will if you have enough faith. That logic is so messed up. It would be like a hungry person saying, "I'm really hungry!" And the response they are given is, "You will have food given to you, if you have enough food." Wait... what? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Akheia Posted September 25, 2012 Share Posted September 25, 2012 "Everything happens for a reason." "God works all things out for good." If they're right and it is their god's will that people suffer so much, it makes me wonder why anybody would follow someone so immoral and outrageously barbaric. I like to remember Mrs. Potts' assertion that things will usually work out all right in the end, but for many situations and for far too many people, that's so obviously not the case. TB - sounds like victim blaming to me. If you're suffering and doubting, it's all your fault. YOURS. Wow, that's horrible. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paine Posted September 25, 2012 Share Posted September 25, 2012 All that they have is bronze age mythology to base their advice on. On disagreements, I hope that you both allow for them and learn a healthy way to compromise. As for kids, I'm sorry that you've had a hard time with that. One slip, and we've always managed to conceive, resulting in all of the "blessings" and misery that children tend to bring (we love them all). If I had it to do again, I would have adopted, or at least fostered. There are so many suffering orphans in the world. You seem to have a good head on your shoulders. :-) Yeah, maybe she could reply to rude infertility remarks by asking if the nice bitch saying that to her would SHE mind sharing her baby....King Solomon style, of course??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stryper Posted September 26, 2012 Share Posted September 26, 2012 Yeah, maybe she could reply to rude infertility remarks by asking if the nice bitch saying that to her would SHE mind sharing her baby....King Solomon style, of course??? as much as I disagree with your politics, you kinda funny on occasion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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