Need Advice Bout Coming Out As A Deconvert In Christian University

[traveller2]

I am in my final year of a theological degree at a small christian university in the UK.I'm no gny say much about it because it could be identified.Though I was very much an evangelical/charismatic type I chose an instituion that was while consevative it is very different from that.It has a great academic reputation.I could do a masters programe there tho I probably will not.It would be a last resort to do one there if I could not get into anywhere else in my hometown.I plan to go for a comparitive religion taught masters in another uni but would do somthing similar in mine if I really had to but doubt it will come to that.

 

As part of my deconversion I really need to tell someone.Dunno why,just for closure and feeel a presure within myself to do so.

 

There is a prof who has been very suportive of me and I am sure from papers I have written knows fine well i am not chrisitan.This is not an evangelical college and I doubt very much he will try to convert me back.It would not work anyway as the reason for my deconversion was 20 yrs nearly of rejection by middle class asswipe christians and their use of christianity to uphold their way of life while scorniong the working man or woman and those who are poor/average earners.

 

You are expected generaly to be a chrsitian though their literature does not state it.I think this prof will keep it confidential and I will set the parameters so I will not discuss it unless its confidential.They all know I divorced my christian wife and they never really bothered bout that.He is not a prof for any classes I take in this final year.

 

Has anyone had this situation before and do you think the cathartic benifit is worth the smalll risk of being honest with them?

[Lilith666]

Ummmm....I don't know, I'm a high school senior, but you're in your last year of getting an Xian degree and are just now deciding to come out? Ouch.

 

 

[traveller2]

yeah a little back ground.I was a christian when I started it, of course.I took two years out due to my divorce so its been nearly six years i have been traveling this path.I deconverted at the end of second year.

[pandora]

How do you plan on coming out? Writing a letter to all your profs, etc... how do you plan to break the news?

[mymistake]

Has anyone had this situation before and do you think the cathartic benifit is worth the smalll risk of being honest with them?

 

I've never been in anything like that. If you just want to walk away you can quit any way you want. If you want to continue and get a degree then maybe you should keep your secret.

[silentknight]

I think there are actually a lot of non-religious that end up in religious schools. My brother went to a christian high school and became an atheist while there. One of his teachers was actually really supportive and almost a mentor of sorts. I wouldn't be TOO worried about it. If their booklets and paperwork don't say anything about having to be a christian, then it's your own business. I wouldn't go around telling everyone, though.

 

And for your sake - I hope your theological degree is about study of religion and not being a minister or something.

[Voice]

I haven't gone for a degree, but I've dealt with institutions like this. You're close enough, just walk the plank, get your degree and don't say anything at all. They will destroy you if you do. You can write books after this. Join GreenPeace.

If you have to take a vow, just be a robot. Just smile and nod.

What is it they say about evolving beyond your programming - you've already begun, but they don't have to know that.

Don't say anything.

[blackpudd1n]

One thing to look into possibly are anti-discrimination laws with regards to higher education facilities. Knowing where you stand legally may be beneficial in deciding what path to take. Then go through the fine print regarding your university and and any requirements for attaining your degree.

 

I haven't been in your situation, but if I was, that would be where I started. If they cannot refuse to award your degree on grounds of your own non-belief, it may be handy to know in case they try.

[StandingRoomOnly]

I deconverted at the end of my junior year at an assemblies of god (christian) university. It was tough in that I felt I had to keep it a secret, or be ostracized. I lived on campus, so I was surrounded by conservative Christians...as I was one of them too when I started. I really threw myself into my classes that last year and closed myself off quite a bit, and as a result, had very little social life so it was a very lonely last year. I had no need to tell any professors, but I did tell a couple of my closest friends there. I don't regret keeping it a secret, but I could have opened myself up to socialize more and enjoy being there, even under the crazy circumstances of deconverting.

[Adam5]

I had no need to tell any professors, but I did tell a couple of my closest friends there. I don't regret keeping it a secret, but I could have opened myself up to socialize more and enjoy being there, even under the crazy circumstances of deconverting.

 

That's all good advice

[traveller2]

Thanks for the replies.I have decided not to reveal it.When i leave this place upon graduation next year i wil be ending the christian chapter of my life.Of course it ended some four-five yrs ago but this is the last vestage of it.

 

I am applying to get on one of various Masters courses in my city all of which are secular and vocational.I am totally at peace with this decision.Must be Guds (S)will pmsl.

[mcdaddy]

Good luck, man. I know more than anyone about wasting years of the prime of your life on something that will put you in a hole.