Burny Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 Stop reading my posts and telling my parents. This site is supposed to be confidential. You're a jerk and a jack ass whoever you are. Thanks also for hurting my folks. Good Christian actions. NOT. 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
◊ crazyguy123 ◊ Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 My wife and I are going through deconversion right now (I'm done, she's still working on it) and one thing that family keeps throwing out at her is how "depressing it is to think that there's no (Christian) god". Her mom and sister basically have said that no matter what, they are just too depressed by the thought that the (Christian) god may not be real to even CONSIDER it as true. This got me thinking about how selfish religion can be. In the end it's all about saving your own ass for a future "heaven" while everyone else is "on their own"! I told my wife to counter that 'argument' with this statement; You want depressing? How about the fact that Christians believe that the 5 billion (at least) people who are currently living their lives for other deities, trying their hardest to please other gods or other ideologies are ALL doing it in VAIN and are ALL destined for eternal judgement because they got their version of god wrong?!?! This is not to mention the billions that have already lived, loved, hated, fought, sacrificed and died for many thousands of different gods over the span of human history! THAT is depressing. I am finding the longer I go forward in my non-belief the more relaxed and less judgmental I am becoming. I no longer have to worry about what god people worship or what their sexual orientation is. I don't have to worry about they do with their money or what religion they claim to follow. I simply don't care about that stuff anymore. For me and my wife it's all about treating fellow humans with the respect they deserve and leaving all else up to them to decide. As long as no innocents are being used or hurt - it's all good. Humanity is wonderful in all its diversity. Atheism took my sins away and took away my need to judge. It gave me a wonderful life that isn't long, but is filled with wonder and awe at the incredible universe we find ourselves in. I have no idea what happens when we die, but I'm pretty sure I'll care as much about being dead as I did before I was born. Atheism has taken away my guilt over 'original sin' and has given me LIFE. THAT is NOT depressing. Christians that still believe could never understand why atheism is not depressing for us. They haven't had our experiences and did not know all of the difficulties we had to deal with as Christians. They just do not understand that a large amount of crap in our lives was thrown out along with Christianity when we put our old religion in the dumpster. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 I struggled with depression during all the decades that I was a Christian. My time as an atheist has been the happiest in my life. I can't say I never feel down but it sure as hell is a lot less. It happens lest often and is less intense. The biggest thing for me was I stopped waiting for an imaginary friend to fix everything and I started to fix my own problems. It can be scary because I don't always know how to fix things but it's wonderful that some problems get fixed now. My imaginary friend never fixed squat. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FloridaGirl Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 Wow. That was a really beautiful post. As someone who is struggling with deconversion right now, I find your post really inspiring. I miss being able to feel like I am connecting to something higher than myself; however, it is always great to keep in the forefront of mind reasons I deconverted in the first place. I also agree with you that there is a really false sense of pride when you are a Christian. You have a false sense of superiority towards people who are "sinners" and towards the Christians you see as less devoted than yourself. I saw that attitude in others and it was awful to witness. It was even worse when I began to notice I was developing the same attitude in myself. I am so glad I don't have to worry about heaven and hell anymore. I never understood how I could be happy in heaven if my agnostic mom was burning in hell. The whole idea of hell always seemed so cruel to me. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Positivist Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 So true, B! Christianity drove my mental health into the ground. - Being conflicted about my values being in opposition to the church's - Being in a constant and ever-increasing state of cognitive dissonance - Believing I am an inherently evil/bad person, full of sin and on the cusp of frying in hell - Having a porous mind and therefore God can read my thoughts (which are sometimes bad!) - Feeling the overwhelming burden to save everyone from hell - Feeling conflicted between saving people from hell versus saving them from their troubles here on earth I could go on and on. Atheism is so much less of a burden that I actually have a sense of bouyancy, even levity. I do my best to help others (humans and creatures alike) simply because life is hard, not because I have to trick them into the gospel. As an atheist I can enjoy life for the simple reason that I am here for a short time and must make the most of it. Freedom!!!!! 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
new2me Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 I agree with other posters above that life as an atheist is much more fulfilling than life as a Christian. I am still a bit uncomfortable with the concept of death, but I find some comfort in the fact that my non-existence will not trouble me after I have gone. My husband, however, finds the idea of there being no God to be too depressing for him to accept. He can't handle the idea that this life is all that there is. He is not hung up on the Christian God or Christianity, but he does not seem to be able to let go of the idea of there being some all-powerful entity that looks after him and that there will be some happy eternity with all of the people he has ever loved after he dies. I suppose if he finds that comforting, it doesn't harm anyone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BendyLine Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 One of the most amazing things about atheism for me is how fulfilling it has been, because I used to be in the school of thought that life had no meaning without God. Really, God was just a gun to my head to live a marginally good life. Good deeds are so much more meaningful when it involves actual sacrifice, instead of expecting some heavenly reward. Also, how the fuck is something moral when you've got a gun to your head called Hell? (I think the movie A Clockwork Orange helped change my thinking on this.) Also, the fact that we've only got this one life makes me want to make the most of it without all the pressure of religion telling me I have to do it just one way. If I fuck up, I can take responsibility and start over without having to bow and scrape to some invisible sky-daddy who watches my every move. If I accomplish something, I can take the credit for it. Life is so short, but the freedom I feel is so sweet. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midniterider Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 My wife and I are going through deconversion right now (I'm done, she's still working on it) and one thing that family keeps throwing out at her is how "depressing it is to think that there's no (Christian) god". Her mom and sister basically have said that no matter what, they are just too depressed by the thought that the (Christian) god may not be real to even CONSIDER it as true. This got me thinking about how selfish religion can be. In the end it's all about saving your own ass for a future "heaven" while everyone else is "on their own"! I told my wife to counter that 'argument' with this statement; You want depressing? How about the fact that Christians believe that the 5 billion (at least) people who are currently living their lives for other deities, trying their hardest to please other gods or other ideologies are ALL doing it in VAIN and are ALL destined for eternal judgement because they got their version of god wrong?!?! This is not to mention the billions that have already lived, loved, hated, fought, sacrificed and died for many thousands of different gods over the span of human history! THAT is depressing. I am finding the longer I go forward in my non-belief the more relaxed and less judgmental I am becoming. I no longer have to worry about what god people worship or what their sexual orientation is. I don't have to worry about they do with their money or what religion they claim to follow. I simply don't care about that stuff anymore. For me and my wife it's all about treating fellow humans with the respect they deserve and leaving all else up to them to decide. As long as no innocents are being used or hurt - it's all good. Humanity is wonderful in all its diversity. Atheism took my sins away and took away my need to judge. It gave me a wonderful life that isn't long, but is filled with wonder and awe at the incredible universe we find ourselves in. I have no idea what happens when we die, but I'm pretty sure I'll care as much about being dead as I did before I was born. Atheism has taken away my guilt over 'original sin' and has given me LIFE. THAT is NOT depressing. I like how you say Atheism took away your sins. Even better than Jesus could! :-) Congratulations on deconversion. The key point of your post for me is how thoughts can cause depression... or in my case anxiety. You can create any thought and associate depression with it. And these depressing or anxious thoughts are just illusion. A good dose of humor can banish negative thoughts/negative feelings. Being particularly anxious the other day I watched 17 of 50 short 2 minute videos of Louis C.K. I laughed my ass off which totally obliterated the negativity. Watching funny videos should be as important as eating right, exercising and taking vitamins. :-) 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Burny Posted May 14, 2013 Author Share Posted May 14, 2013 Stop reading my posts and telling my parents. This site is supposed to be confidential. You're a jerk and a jack ass whoever you are. Thanks also for hurting my folks. Good Christian actions. NOT. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Burny Posted May 14, 2013 Author Share Posted May 14, 2013 Stop reading my posts and telling my parents. This site is supposed to be confidential. You're a jerk and a jack ass whoever you are. Thanks also for hurting my folks. Good Christian actions. NOT. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Burny Posted May 14, 2013 Author Share Posted May 14, 2013 Stop reading my posts and telling my parents. This site is supposed to be confidential. You're a jerk and a jack ass whoever you are. Thanks also for hurting my folks. Good Christian actions. NOT. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
♦ ficino ♦ Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 I came to find Christianity depressing: God's seeming refusal to answer prayers of the sort He promised in scripture to answer; God's injustice toward groups like gays, women, and on and on; demands made by cognitive dissonance as I tried to rationalize contradictions, absurdities and immoralities; political positions favored by Christians, which were repugnant to freedom; hostility toward human nature; feeling pressured to witness all the time; feeling pressured to find meaning all the time; feeling pressured to discern God's leading all the time... 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
new2me Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 I agree with other posters above that life as an atheist is much more fulfilling than life as a Christian. I am still a bit uncomfortable with the concept of death, but I find some comfort in the fact that my non-existence will not trouble me after I have gone. My husband, however, finds the idea of there being no God to be too depressing for him to accept. He can't handle the idea that this life is all that there is. He is not hung up on the Christian God or Christianity, but he does not seem to be able to let go of the idea of there being some all-powerful entity that looks after him and that there will be some happy eternity with all of the people he has ever loved after he dies. I suppose if he finds that comforting, it doesn't harm anyone. I do understand what your husband is going through - but it's comparable to losing a fantasy like Santa Clause. I think it's time humanity grows up and faces reality. What I would ask your husband is how he knows that this "all-powerful entity" cares at all about our happiness? Evidence in the REAL WORLD would suggest the exact opposite. There's so much suffering here that any God that could exist, should scare the hell out of most people! He very obviously either doesn't care, or can't do anything about it. Either way - no relevance for us humans and certainly not an all-loving entity. I agree with you completely. I think my husband would also agree, but he just can't let himself go there - at least not right now. He has essentially told me that he needs to hold on to his fantasy belief or he will drown in a sea of depression. While I hate to see him lie to himself, I prefer that to the depression. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
◊ crazyguy123 ◊ Posted May 14, 2013 Share Posted May 14, 2013 I agree with other posters above that life as an atheist is much more fulfilling than life as a Christian. I am still a bit uncomfortable with the concept of death, but I find some comfort in the fact that my non-existence will not trouble me after I have gone. My husband, however, finds the idea of there being no God to be too depressing for him to accept. He can't handle the idea that this life is all that there is. He is not hung up on the Christian God or Christianity, but he does not seem to be able to let go of the idea of there being some all-powerful entity that looks after him and that there will be some happy eternity with all of the people he has ever loved after he dies. I suppose if he finds that comforting, it doesn't harm anyone. I do understand what your husband is going through - but it's comparable to losing a fantasy like Santa Clause. I think it's time humanity grows up and faces reality. What I would ask your husband is how he knows that this "all-powerful entity" cares at all about our happiness? Evidence in the REAL WORLD would suggest the exact opposite. There's so much suffering here that any God that could exist, should scare the hell out of most people! He very obviously either doesn't care, or can't do anything about it. Either way - no relevance for us humans and certainly not an all-loving entity. I agree with you completely. I think my husband would also agree, but he just can't let himself go there - at least not right now. He has essentially told me that he needs to hold on to his fantasy belief or he will drown in a sea of depression. While I hate to see him lie to himself, I prefer that to the depression. As long as the fantasy belief doesn't cause your husband to be depressed, then it's not so bad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest r3alchild Posted May 15, 2013 Share Posted May 15, 2013 I hope the universe knows what its doing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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