viocjit Posted October 14, 2013 Share Posted October 14, 2013 Hi ! My name is Anthony I'm 19 years old and I'm a Strong Atheist. Also I'm a former Christian and ex-conspiracy theorist. My hobbies are "computing , reading , TV , radio , spirituality , religions , foreign languages , video games etc..." More about myself : I'm a Frenchman and I'm writing my deconversion story but I need help to make this because I don't think being too skilled in English language to write an understandable text. Soon , I'll write a second draft because native English speakers sended reviews to me. First draft : Reader(s) I don't know who are you and you don't know who I'm. Let me introduce myself. My name is Anthony and I'm a Frenchman who live in a "Muslim Ghetto" in this region called "Isle of France" or "Île-de-France" in French language. When I was four years old I became Christian , to be more accurate I can say that at this period of my lifetime I didn't know that I was a "cafetaria catholic". I became Christian because I believed that God was talking to me (emotionaly and not with words) and that he gave to me a mission that I'll discover later. At the end of 90's I desired being a better Catholic to be baptised (I was never baptised I thanks my mother and my father to let me the choice). Between my conversion and my deconversion I felt myself guilty because I was an "agnostic theist". I fear the hell nearby my whole life because a day I understood that Catholicism isn't the right denomination. Therefore I looked for the right denomination and now I know that all of them are false because Christianity isn't the right religion like all religions from our world. Also I fear the hell because I thought that I was a sinner. I'm happy to say that sin doesn't exist. At the age of eight years old I discovered the "evolution theory" therefore I thought that Genesis is only an allegory. I became a conspiracy theorist because since my 4 years old I had the sensation that I was choosed by the creator to do and make something of really important for the futur of humanity (I was probably trapped by my ego). Like these videos and texts about conspiracy theories seemed logic to me. I believed received a kind of revelation like "here is your mission". I discovered conspiracy theories when I began to view pro-psy (astral projection ,telekinesy , telepathy , etc...) and esoterical websites because I desired improve my spirituality when I was between 10-11 years old. I became really a conspiracy theorist when I was between 12-14 years old. I stopped to look into psy and esoterism between my 14-15 years old because I thought that it was a sin. At the age of 16 years old I read the whole Bible and I understood that Christians don't practice all the laws of the eternal. I felt myself guilty. Also I was shocked by the content of the OT. The Bible seemed to me a book of non-sense because the organisation of each of these texts are not really understandable. I saw contradictions in the synoptical Gospels but I still continue to believe for emotional reasons. Some month later I discovered that texts from biblical corpus contain interpolation like John 7:53-8:11. I still continue to believe because I feared the hell and I thought that the deity let the forgers to act because of the existence of "free will" (Now I know that neurology say that free will is rather an illusion). Some years before discovered this fact I discovered that Jesus have similitudes with others mythological characters but I thought that Satan inspired the writers of pagan myths. This year I discovered that many biblical events like Exodus never happened. Keys to better understand my story : 1.In my family people are not really religious (cafetaria catholicism). 2.I tried to be a better Christian because in my family people are cafetaria catholics and I was very interested about religion. Also I can cite the fear of hell. 3.I was between 14 and 15 years old the last time where I went in a church. 4.I was never baptised because I doubted my whole life and I desired being honest with the master of the universe. Before being an Agnostic and now an Atheist . I was an Agnostic theist. 5.I looked for the right Christian denomination nearby my whole life. All of them appeared to me disconect to the reality. 6.I went in a church approximately between 7 and 15 time in my life. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted October 14, 2013 Share Posted October 14, 2013 Welcome. I'm a strong atheist myself. We don't have many members from France so it will be good to hear from your perspective. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
viocjit Posted October 14, 2013 Author Share Posted October 14, 2013 Welcome. I'm a strong atheist myself. We don't have many members from France so it will be good to hear from your perspective. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RenaissanceWoman Posted October 14, 2013 Share Posted October 14, 2013 Welcome! Your English is good enough for us, mon ami! I too went through a period as of late with conspiracy theories. I think it's a way to start thinking outside of the box. I realized there were too many false prophecies there too -- the world is going to end any day now when the aliens finally de-cloak, or when a certain comet hits the sun, or whatever. Any day now, any day now... Ha ha! I hope you find some interesting perspectives here. We would love to hear more from you. Votre anglais est tres bien -- meilleur de mon français! Bienvenue! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wanderinstar Posted October 15, 2013 Share Posted October 15, 2013 Welcome!! Your English is almost flawless and easy to read. You sound like a thinker, someone who is always questioning everything around them. This will serve you well. I got into conspiracy theories and was incredibly paranoid that the Illuminati were trying to kill us all off. Still, reading into all the various conspiracies helped me to begin to question christianity, which led to my deconversion. Now I am still interested in ancient mysteries, UFO's etc but only for curiosities sake. In practice I am an atheist too, but a spiritual one, if that makes sense. I am in awe of the universe and feel connected to it in a spiritual way and am open to non-theistic eastern religions and paganism. It feel great to think for yourself. I wish you all the best 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lerk Posted October 15, 2013 Share Posted October 15, 2013 Welcome aboard! I'm glad that you've learned the truth at such a young age. Some of us were so entrenched that it's been hard to get out of when we're older. I think I've heard "Île-de-France" used regarding the MotoGP at LeMans. Googling, I see that it's the region where Paris and Versailles are. In these days of the internet, we're all accustomed to reading English that is not exactly the way a native speaker would write. In your case, the meaning is perfectly understandable. And if you would have written in French, I would just have pasted it into Google Translate so that I could read it! Again, welcome. As someone else said, it's really good to have people from different countries so that we can get a larger perspective on various topics. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
viocjit Posted October 15, 2013 Author Share Posted October 15, 2013 @RenaissanceWoman Thanks for your message. It made me thought that there are many ex-conspiracy theorists. Who speak about them ? few people. @wanderinstar I can reknown a bit of myself in your message. Some parts of your message make me think that you're have something of a pantheist. @MisterTwo Discover the truth is rather very easy when you live in a Western European country. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RipVanWinkle Posted October 16, 2013 Share Posted October 16, 2013 Your English is very understandable. If your intention is to tell your story in this forum, I don't think you need any help. If you want to publish it for public consumption there are many members here that would probably be happy to edit it for you to make it more grammatically correct. But as I said,for use here, it's fine as it is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
viocjit Posted October 17, 2013 Author Share Posted October 17, 2013 Personally I think that my text need improvement. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator florduh Posted October 17, 2013 Super Moderator Share Posted October 17, 2013 Welcome. You're English is fine, no worries there. As you leave gullibility behind, many things once assumed to be valid will come into question. As far as I can tell, critical thinking is the only road to any truth. When you automatically test all claims for evidence and logic, it's a better world! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RenaissanceWoman Posted October 18, 2013 Share Posted October 18, 2013 We are quite accustomed to non-native English speakers here in the US (mostly of the hispanic sort), so stop worrying! Besides, speaking another language is hard enough -- but writing it out is a whole larger challenge. I could carry on decent conversations in France, but if I wrote a letter or email, I was constantly checking my textbooks for proper spelling and grammar. (Simple things that speak easily, but are spelled differently, like "allez" or "aller". And all those accent marks you use when writing but not when speaking -- yikes!) What we really care about is YOU, and what is going on in your mind. This journey can be lonely and confusing, and we will do what we can to listen and respond the best we can. So please keep posting. All spelling and grammar imperfections will be overlooked. Believe me -- the vast majority of Americans possess French language skills far below your English skills (if we have any French knowledge at all, which I would guess most do not). You are golden, mon ami! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adam5 Posted October 18, 2013 Share Posted October 18, 2013 ... I got into conspiracy theories and was incredibly paranoid that the Illuminati were trying to kill us all off. Still, reading into all the various conspiracies helped me to begin to question christianity, which led to my deconversion. ... Me too! I think the psychology of religion and conspiracies must be closly linked. Same cherry picking of facts for starters. Good to see a fellow Europeen. Je suis un comptable en Angleterre et aussi un ex-C. Bienvenue Anthony. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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