The Longest, Bass-Ackward Path From Christian To Atheist You’Ve Ever Heard

[♦ ficino ♦]

 If there is a god who loves me, he has a funny way of showing it.  I’m not an angry atheist – I won’t call people “idiots” or “fuckwads” if they do believe. They’re where I was not long ago. But I defy anyone to go through what I’ve been through and not recognize that God is a myth.

 

We’re on our own, and I wish I had known that 30 years ago.

Wow, I am saddened at so many of the events you recount, Amethyst, but what an instructive and heartfelt story - and well written.  I agree about the "on our own" part.  Recently I was talking with a former student who was raised Hindu but is agnostic.  She said that being confronted with the massive poverty in India, and the too-common attitude, "they are paying for their past lives," and the seeming failure of God to do anything about it, led her to think that it is a lot less depressing to think that things are accidents than to think that God is planning it, suffering and all.

[bfuddled]

I'm a little late on this, but wanted to say WELCOME. I was in tears reading your story. It sounds like your ex has some serious mental health issues that have never been addressed. I'm so sorry that you had to go through that. I am glad you're still here and on a much better path. Please stick around and post, I think your perspective is a much needed one. *hugs*

[Amethyst7]

My Extimony (slightly rewritten) is now featured on the front page. There is a very lively discussion going on underneath. Invitation.

[Amethyst7]

 

LOL.

 

Another thought I've had:

 

I don't know if you live in America or not, but one disturbing aspect of American society--and this is completely separate from religion--is that once you hit a certain age, you've "wasted your whole life" and this and that sort of, if I may be blunt, B.S.  And it really, truly, is a load of B.S. because, well, I turned 30 last November.  As far as I'm concerned I've lived a full life, albeit it took me over a decade after I came out as a gay man to fully realize the corruption of Christianity, and that it's a process.  And, well, processes take TIME.  Very few things take place overnight.  Unlike a fast food joint, things don't happen INSTANTANEOUSLY.  So I think you should cut yourself some slack there, as well.

 

Andrew

My two cents on wasting your whole life:  I'm 50 also and I've been through my own fun and games of those years.  Divorce, losing my career, working for near minimum wage (three jobs cobbled together) for 10 years as an adult (I had never worked for minimum wage as a teenager, always more, and had a good career I had started decades ago then gave up to raise kids), and well, lots of crap.  Then I turn 50.  You know, it wasn't always fun, but sometimes it was.  I've had some good times and there are times I think I wasted a lot of my life.  But there really are still a lot of years to go!  And at least I've had those hard times young (rather than hitting them at 75 and going WTF?) and I've learned and recovered and also learned a lot about myself and my own resilience.  So yeah, cut yourself some slack.  You're still young!  You're obviously intelligent and hard-working and you keep trying.  And you're out of the craziness of xianity!  You can look at Alex and his family and see them for what they are.  There are people who never get out of xianity, who believe everything they're told and blame themselves their whole lives.  YOU GOT OUT!!!!  That is NOT a wasted life.  

 

And welcome!  One thing I can tell you about what you've been through -- you'll be able to bring a very strong, sure perspective on anything you post on here, and I'm very glad you're here.

 

THANK YOU!