unsureaboutgod Posted May 27, 2014 Share Posted May 27, 2014 I've been lurking for quite awhile and am finally ready to introduce myself. I grew up in a solidly Christian home. We believed every word of the Bible was purposely placed by God through divinely inspired authors. Though I struggled with periods of rebellion, I never doubted God's existence or the truth of His Word. I studied at seminary and worked as a youth minister for a small church for a number of years. As has been the case with many others, I eventually became disillusioned with the Church. (Unchecked hypocrisy, unqualified leaders of divinely attributed popular election, narrow, clannish fellowship practices...) I stopped praying because I was tired of having one-way conversations. I found myself beginning to question it all. I began re-reading things I'd previously dismissed or argued against. I allowed myself to hold the Bible to the same standards of criticism as any other set of documents. I discovered it to be nothing more than the work of an ancient people struggling to understand the world around them without the benefit of scientific explanation. There is no divine hand moving throughout history. If there is a creator/prime mover/intelligent designer, it is certainly not the God of the Bible. If there is no God, there is no sin. There is no hell. There is no heaven. There is science and beauty and this life, here and now and for however long it lasts. And it is worth living! I re-calibrated my conscience. I admitted my unbelief to my wife. She is now actually reading the Bible for herself, prompting discussions which are leading her to many of the same conclusions about it. It's not always easy, but we are determined to discover the truth together. It feels so incredible to be able to write this: JEHOVAH IS NOT REAL! HE IS NOT REAL AND THAT IS COMPLETELY FUCKING OKAY! There are still so many difficulties, both present and ahead, with family and friends who will be hurt and confused by my de-conversion. I will cross those bridges when they arrive. It will be worth it. The sweater is unravelled, and I am finally free. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
par4dcourse Posted May 27, 2014 Share Posted May 27, 2014 Welcome to the forums, Unsure. We're here to help anyway we can. It's often said that the bible is the atheist's best friend. Once you start reading with an open mind it all falls apart quickly. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amateur Posted May 27, 2014 Share Posted May 27, 2014 Welcome! And I'm glad you and your wife are working on this together. There are so many couples on this site who have so many problems related to one losing the faith and the other retaining it. This is a good place to ask questions, read around and learn a lot! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unsureaboutgod Posted May 27, 2014 Author Share Posted May 27, 2014 Par, you're right. It is far more difficult to make the Bible work with science, history, and archaeology than it is to accept it as deeply flawed and biased work of historic fiction. Amateur, I am so fortunate to be married to someone willing to make the trip with me. Thank you both for your encouraging words! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roz Posted May 27, 2014 Share Posted May 27, 2014 Unsure, seriously, you're one lucky guy. You came out to your spouse as an unbeliever, now she's researching the bible for herself and seeing the same contradictions you saw? Hold onto that gal, she's got a mind she's not afraid to use! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unsureaboutgod Posted May 28, 2014 Author Share Posted May 28, 2014 She's incredible and I am a very lucky man, Roz! She grew up not knowing much about the Bible. Being in ministry when we met, I initially encouraged her to study it in order to strengthen her faith. It wasn't until I admitted my doubts that she really began reading it seriously, though. She almost fell over when I told her I now believe Darwin was right; she told me I almost had her convinced evolution was impossible! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellinas Posted May 29, 2014 Share Posted May 29, 2014 She's incredible and I am a very lucky man, Roz! She grew up not knowing much about the Bible. Being in ministry when we met, I initially encouraged her to study it in order to strengthen her faith. It wasn't until I admitted my doubts that she really began reading it seriously, though. She almost fell over when I told her I now believe Darwin was right; she told me I almost had her convinced evolution was impossible! That's actually very funny. Enjoy the journey. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
♦ nivek ♦ Posted May 29, 2014 Share Posted May 29, 2014 Unsure, Welcome. After welcome? All yours now to set direction to head into. kevinL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeverAgainV Posted May 29, 2014 Share Posted May 29, 2014 Welcome!! I'm so glad that you are freeing yourself from the vice grip of bible religion! Yaay you and your wife! As some have mentioned, consider yourself lucky you have a spouse who is willing to go with you in your journey. Of course there will be obstacles, as you mentioned how family will take it...or maybe you wont share it with everyone? You'll figure it out as you go. It was one crazy day when I realized the "god" I had believed in and gave up SO much for...was all a big fat lie. There were so many emotions, devastation, anger, grief, relief, happiness...it's definitely a journey. Good luck with yours! Stick around and let us know how you are doing. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abrooks2007 Posted May 30, 2014 Share Posted May 30, 2014 Hey unsure. The present contradictions in the Bible are something I had known about for years. It was something that I inherently knew was off, yet in the name of "faith" I dismissed them. It wasn't until moving to L.A. and talking with some atheists and agnostics that I really began, as you did, to question for myself. My result was the complete surrender of my faith just a month and a half ago. And it's liberating to acknowledge the lie, the hypocrisy, and to just embrace the world and the love that's here as it is. Awesome that your wife is so open minded. Love the part in which she almost fell over when you started taking Darwin's theory of evolution into account. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neverlandrut Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 Same here. I was so devoted to serving Jesus. I too believed that every word in the bible was divinely inspired. Once you stop making excuses for the errors and contradictions in the bible, it falls apart very quickly. That was the death blow to my faith. You are so fortunate to have such an open minded wife. I love my wife and she loves me, but she is seeing it as impossible for us to coexist while having opposite beliefs. We're trying to work through it. Time will tell for me. Welcome! Thanks so much for sharing! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator TheRedneckProfessor Posted June 1, 2014 Super Moderator Share Posted June 1, 2014 I re-calibrated my conscience. Nicely phrased. Welcome to the forums. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unsureaboutgod Posted June 2, 2014 Author Share Posted June 2, 2014 Thank you all for the warm welcome! It feels good to be part a community of people who can genuinely relate to these experiences! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dutchie Posted June 3, 2014 Share Posted June 3, 2014 I found myself beginning to question it all. I began re-reading things I'd previously dismissed or argued against. I allowed myself to hold the Bible to the same standards of criticism as any other set of documents. I discovered it to be nothing more than the work of an ancient people struggling to understand the world around them without the benefit of scientific explanation. There is no divine hand moving throughout history. If there is a creator/prime mover/intelligent designer, it is certainly not the God of the Bible. If there is no God, there is no sin. There is no hell. There is no heaven. There is science and beauty and this life, here and now and for however long it lasts. And it is worth living! Nicely put. I went to the same thing. I find it interesting now, that it is normal in Christianity to only know the bible from inside out, while all other books are firstly criticize by the credibility of the author, how the book relates to other books on the same subject (in case of the bible - history) Ps, welcome! Ex-C is a place to let it out, to find support PPS, it is totally okay to be unsure! It reminds me of a video about the of a pastor. Its very nice PPPS, Science is great! I just began to watch Cosmos ´cosmos a spacetime odyssey´ Really a must Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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