Jump to content

Don’t Be Obvious


I Broke Free
 Share

Recommended Posts

This morning I was going to respond to a post made in Christianforums.com. I took the time to complete a thoughtful reply only to find that the thread had been deleted by the time I was done writing it. The topic dealt with how to treat homosexual members of the Church. I suppose too many people made rational arguments and thus the thread was now deemed worthy of removal.

 

Many of the Christians argued that a Christian person who has dedicated his life to Christ and is not engaging homosexual acts should not be considered a homosexual. These Christians went on to say that these people may still suffer from homosexual desires, but they should still be treated just like anyone else at church, “as long they keep their orientation to themselves” “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” & “Don’t Be Obvious” were suggested as the remedy for Christians with a homosexual orientation wishing to maintain a good relationship with other church members.

 

It is my position that hiding ones homosexual orientation would require a Christian to break one of the Big Ten; Thou shalt not bear false witness. What these people don’t realize is that people do not accept a neutral sexual stance as proof of heterosexuality; which I believe is really what they want projected. If a 35 year-old single man was a member of your church and over the years never discussed a girl friend, or a desire to have a girl friend, and repeatedly rejected help from church members to find a girl friend; then what would they presume? The man may have never ‘told,’ and was never ‘obvious,’ but he would be under suspicion nonetheless. What would be the consequences of that suspicion? The only way to avoid the suspicion of having a homosexual orientation would be for him to lie in some way. He could pretend to be interested in women and date occasionally; which is a form of dishonestly and carries with it the potential to harm. He could tell church members that he was once married and that to marry again would be adulterous. (That would not make him many friends) He could lie and make up all sorts of reasons to make others more comfortable with his presence.

 

Don’t ask, don’t tell; Don’t be obvious, & Keep your orientation to yourself are just ways of saying, “We wish you weren’t here at all.”

 

The only place a homosexual is permitted in these types of churches is as a poster boy or girl for the Ex-Gay movement. There they can be monitored, watched, pitied, and kept under control.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

....are just ways of saying, “We wish you weren’t here at all.”

 

The only place a homosexual is permitted in these types of churches is as a poster boy or girl for the Ex-Gay movement. There they can be monitored, watched, pitied, and kept under control.

 

Another easy reason why I stay away from christianity/religion. :grin:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

If a 35 year-old single man was a member of your church and over the years never discussed a girl friend, or a desire to have a girl friend, and repeatedly rejected help from church members to find a girl friend; then what would they presume?

IBF, many years ago I was telling my then husband (the gay, one, remember?) the tragic story I'd just heard about one of the bosses where I worked. It seems that boss had once been engaged to a charming and lovely girl. Two weeks before the wedding was to take place, she was flying back to the U.S. from London when her plane went down in the Atlantic, and now here he was, years later, in his mid-thirties, still grieving.

 

There was a respectful pause for my sadness before Hubby said, "Honey, do you have any idea how many fiances of gay boys died in that crash?!"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It seems to be that way with every high-pressure group, among christianity. It pays to remember that it isn't just LGBT people who get this treatment, but so does anyone who "deviates" from the WASP ideal.

 

Still I am glad that I started dealing with my sexuality after I left the Church. Made a lot of questions easier to find honest answers to.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Part of my disassociation with the church and religious based groups I was connected with was caused by the treatrment of those even *suspected* of being *not right* "sexually".

 

Really pissed me off as an early 20-s cat then, to know my particular tastes and passions wouldn't be acceptable to the *norms* who made up the oversight of the various youth and young adult groups.

 

Was funny, how though, "we freaks" find each other dispite the religious clamp down on hormones and habits.. ;)

 

When a a male friend of mine told me he was *GAY* (OMG!!111oNE OnE ONe!!!11 FIRE OF GOHWD!!! oNE ONE!!!), seems that I was one of the few who did not cast him off as a friend and fellow traveller.

 

He, as far as the assembly was concerned, was soviet-style "dissapeared".

Not talked of, ignored, not associated with, and never spoken directly to.

But they took his money and continued to support the membership numbers with his name and presence in back pew..

 

Pissed me off. Man was decent, clean, temperate, and one of the cleanest humored funny guys I've had pleasure of knowing.

 

But.. because he admitted to the youth pastor he had a reference for his own sex (AFAIA never acted on it, preferring to stay celibate, rather than *sin*), and somehow the contents of that convo becoming public, he was ostricised and shunned.

 

Pissed me off.. That and dozens of other little problems, mostly dealing with how the xtians deal with things and attitudes that are private between consenting adults..

 

I guess the thing that tears it for me is that there is no niggling little detail too petty for the religious proctors not to want to try and control..

 

fukk'um

 

kL

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thank you Nivek,

 

Your post underscored my main point. Fundamentalist Christians do hate the sinner as much as the sin, at least when it comes to homosexuality. The only place for the homosexual (even if celibate) within the context of their faith is to be relegated to their sideline freak show (ex-gay program) where they can be monitored. The only way a homosexual would get any kind of normal treatment at church is if he or she went to extraordinary measures to cultivate a veneer (lie) of heterosexuality.

 

IBF

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This morning I was going to respond to a post made in Christianforums.com. I took the time to complete a thoughtful reply only to find that the thread had been deleted by the time I was done writing it.

What chicken shit. I bet if the title of the thread was titled "Stone homosexuals in the town square!" with reference to Leviticus 20:13 I am sure the thread would still be open and bustling with posts of agreement. Anyone who disagreed would rightly be accused of being a heretic, a blasphemer or a sinful heathen who should be banned and their CF account immediately terminated.

 

That site is such a joke, I wonder if the mods sit around all day and pray, "Which Posts Would Jesus Delete?" ™ :Wendywhatever:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Two weeks before the wedding was to take place, she was flying back to the U.S. from London when her plane went down in the Atlantic, and now here he was, years later, in his mid-thirties, still grieving.

 

There was a respectful pause for my sadness before Hubby said, "Honey, do you have any idea how many fiances of gay boys died in that crash?!"

 

 

I watched a documentary on the life of Rock Hudson recently. What a coincidence; I think one of Rock’s previous fiancées died on that same flight! :eek:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
 Share

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Guidelines.