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Goodbye Jesus

Walked Out Of Sunday School


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Posted

I made no big speech. I had no hissy fit. I just merely left, saying "excuse me" to the people I had to pass through.

 

My tolerance threshold is really getting thin as time goes on.

 

The church is pushing an evangelism agenda currently. Every sunday school class is hammering evangelism. There's no getting away from it. There are no classes right now on The Book of Hebrews, or The history of 1st century Christianity--They're all evangelism! An aside: I've always said to myself, "Jesus was talking to his 11 disciples when he said go tell the world, not each of us!". But of course, that would not be considered in this church, except merely considered heretical.

 

Meanwhile, onto this sunday. We're studying this book which tells you how to cozy up to potentials. All sorts of gimmicks and strategies. The authors say "of course these aren't gimmicks, because that would be dishonest, but meanwhile, here's some real good ones." (paraphrased).

 

The teacher began telling us a story of how he was in the navy, and how he had to live in a sexually profane environment. He began telling us of what temptations he'd be subjected to in overseas ports.

 

Now, I have one weakness (just one!). It's that I get a red face while people talk sex stuff. Call it guilt, call it shame, call it -- anything you want. Even if they're talking about things i haven't done or would never do, i get the red face thinking of what i *have* done. I've never been to an overseas port getting serviced by a girl under the table, but that doesn't matter to my little face. It goes red. Very uncomfortable. Very.

 

So, as my tolerance is decreasing and decreasing, I tend to assert myself more, saying, "FTS, I'm not going to sit here and be subjected to this discomfort by this brainwashed evangelhead". So I up and left, and went and sat in the warm cozy car. It was like sliding back into bed after getting up too early.

Posted

Good for you - walking out of Sunday School is a good step along to road to walking out of the whole nonsense altogether. There are better things to do on a Sunday morning - like sleep.

Posted

LOL! That takes me back. For a VERY short time as a child, I attended an evangelical methodist sunday school, and I remember how turned off I was when we were encouraged to go out and "recruit souls for jesus" and were told that the more we brought in "the brighter will you shine in heaven." What!, I thought; They have to exercise their superiority complex even after death? No, thank you!

 

Of course, the encouragement to shine bright in heaven came from the same ss teacher who told us chillun that as a student in bible college she was very poor and couldn't afford a lot of nice clothes so she prayed to god to prevent her from getting runs in her nylons. She said it worked, so it must be true.

Posted

Good for you Bon... That's good that you just walked out. Don't blame you... Well, I don't go to church and haven't for over 20 years but I would if I went to church now. Nice that you told him a thing or two, too. You should not be subjected to that shite when you could have stayed in bed!

 

 

As for the praying for the runs in the nylon, what a nut job that chick was... God doesn't prevent runs in your panty hose. Don't you think God would have better things to do with God's time besides being the No-Nonsense Hose Guy for some chick.... That was her own wishful thinking. :Doh:

Posted

When a xian would start raving on about "we all must go into all the world and recruit"

I would just quote the scripture that said," live a quiet peaceful life but always be ready to share your faith to only those that ask you"

Which is in acts or one of the epistles.

Or the one which states," are we all feet or hands, no each person has their given role to perform"

So being told that we ALL must evangelise is utter crap.

Posted

When a xian would start raving on about "we all must go into all the world and recruit"

I would just quote the scripture that said," live a quiet peaceful life but always be ready to share your faith to only those that ask you"

Which is in acts or one of the epistles.

Or the one which states," are we all feet or hands, no each person has their given role to perform"

So being told that we ALL must evangelise is utter crap.

 

It's all about safety in numbers... gaining strength from having a bunch of other xians cheering you on... Don't you love that pack mentality? :phew:

Posted

The teacher began telling us a story of how he was in the navy, and how he had to live in a sexually profane environment. He began telling us of what temptations he'd be subjected to in overseas ports.

 

 

They never talked about under-the-table knob jobs in my old church. Methodists, you know. *sigh*

 

Methodists are like Barbie and Ken; they don't actually have genitalia. I'm pretty sure I was the only one. :grin:

Posted

So, as my tolerance is decreasing and decreasing, I tend to assert myself more, saying, "FTS, I'm not going to sit here and be subjected to this discomfort by this brainwashed evangelhead". So I up and left, and went and sat in the warm cozy car. It was like sliding back into bed after getting up too early.

 

So are you going to church because you're forced to by someone else, or are you just starting to come out of the fold?

 

I was a bit confused because your listing for Gods reads: "Any Gods?: Anybody but Biblegod"

Posted

Forced to.

 

But at least it gives me nice ranting material.

 

 

Oh, from an earlier comment, I did NOT say anything outloud to the teacher! That quote of mine, "FTS, I'm not going to sit here..." was just what i was thinking before i got up and left. (i should have been more clear!)

 

 

I'll have to update my listing for Gods, because it makes no sense as i've written it. I dont care much for Korangod either.

Posted

Of course, the encouragement to shine bright in heaven came from the same ss teacher who told us chillun that as a student in bible college she was very poor and couldn't afford a lot of nice clothes so she prayed to god to prevent her from getting runs in her nylons. She said it worked, so it must be true.

 

So God performed a miracle and provided an unlimited supply of nail polish. Bwahahahah!

 

A thought crossed my mind while reading this. Isn't this example of "answered prayer" really an example of trivializing their God? I know the evangelical reply would be "God is concerned about every little detail of your life...He knows the hairs on your head, He watches the sparrows, etc, etc.". But you look at the Bible, and all of the supposedly great miracles God/Jesus performs; splitting the Red Sea, raising people from the dead, healing lepers of their illness...and this same God, who is said to be the same yesterday, today and forever, in modern times can only manage to halt the destruction of a pair of nylons? "What a mighty God we serve!" :lmao:

Posted

So the church is essentially teaching people how to brainwash others? Very sad.

 

Can you bring an MP3 player to church and listen to that? There are small, discrete ones. I've seen them. I suppose your parents probably wouldn't let you.

 

Just keep in mind that it won't last forever. Just until you're old enough to legally move out. If I were you, I'd check up on your state laws about that and plan for the future.

Posted

So the church is essentially teaching people how to brainwash others? Very sad.

 

Can you bring an MP3 player to church and listen to that? There are small, discrete ones. I've seen them. I suppose your parents probably wouldn't let you.

 

Just keep in mind that it won't last forever. Just until you're old enough to legally move out. If I were you, I'd check up on your state laws about that and plan for the future.

Amethyst (love your name) it's actually one big, giant mind-fucking experience. Brainwashing is too kind, ma'am...

 

If you get a Nano, it is small enough to slip into your pocket and just listen away - but you should play something like Marilyn Manson with external speakers so everyone at church can enjoy..... :eek:

Posted

Amethyst (love your name) it's actually one big, giant mind-fucking experience. Brainwashing is too kind, ma'am...

 

If you get a Nano, it is small enough to slip into your pocket and just listen away - but you should play something like Marilyn Manson with external speakers so everyone at church can enjoy..... :eek:

 

Unfortunately, it's not my real name. But it seems to fit me better.

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