Holy Hustle snippet #11

[wadori]

Early in the morning he went to the temple again and the people came and sat down to listen to his malarkey.  The scribes and Pharisees brought a woman to him who was guilty of adultery.  They said, "Master, this woman was caught in the very act of adultery.  Moses commanded that such should be stoned.  What do you say?"  But they were just trying to trap our hero.

Jesus said, "And where is the man who was caught with her?"  Well, he was going to say that, but, instead, he stooped down and wrote on the ground desperately trying to think of something better to say.  Finally, when they kept questioning him, he got right clever and said, "Whoever among you has no sin can cast the first stone."

Then, being pricked by their own consciences, they all went away, knowing they were all pricks.  He stood up and asked her, "Woman.  Where are your accusers?  Has no prick condemned you?"

"No one, lord," she responded.

"Well, I guess after all the shenanigans that I have pulled I can't condemn you, either.  You can go, but quit all that damned sinning, would you?"

 

from my book, “Holy Hustle: A Bible Parody, Consisting of All 66 Books of Both the Old and the New Hustles”