The Root Of It All

[Casualfanboy16]

Throughout my deconversion process, I've come to realize rather quickly a lot of the problems I have in a lot of areas in my life stem from three main things: Perfectionism, fear, and anxiety. Growing up, perfectionism has always held me back from achieving my dreams, goals and aspirations. It was like some kind of weed, festering and growing beneath the surface and killing the motivation and drive for pursuing my passions. Along with my perfectionist tendencies, my fears and anxieties fed off of it, and in turn, caused them to grow as well. My passions for the things I wanted to do withered, died and dried up. My passion to draw and write and  create something meaningful gradually fell away. Now, it's time to pull the weeds. I'm not sure what to do now, but I'm hoping I can plant the seeds again and get back on track, and hopefully, they'll bloom into something beautiful from this. (Yeah I noticed I do a lot of self-reflection and stuff lol. I guess that a good thing. Also metaphors. It's the writer in me haha).