LosingMyReligion Posted May 13, 2006 Share Posted May 13, 2006 I was just thinking... Would hell really be such a bad place? Would I really want to be around Bible god for all eternity? He is such an asshole. I mean we all know how he is. I don't think I need to elaborate. There is no telling how he might flip on you once you get past the pearly gates. Infact, I think it would be worse being stuck under him. You would have to mind your P's and Q's like an abused foster child. So I think hell would be better. There will be so many great people in hell as well. Alot of rock stars, gay people, Ghandi, Buddha, The Dalai Lama, and the list goes on and on. There would be so much to do in hell. To me hell would be alot more fun...And if we buy a state of the art air condition it will be even better. P.S. And the only station you would get in Heaven is TBN...Gag me with a chainsaw! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taphophilia Posted May 13, 2006 Share Posted May 13, 2006 I was just thinking... Would hell really be such a bad place? Would I really want to be around Bible god for all eternity? He is such an asshole. I mean we all know how he is. I don't think I need to elaborate. There is no telling how he might flip on you once you get past the pearly gates. Infact, I think it would be worse being stuck under him. You would have to mind your P's and Q's like an abused foster child. So I think hell would be better. There will be so many great people in hell as well. Alot of rock stars, gay people, Ghandi, Buddha, The Dalai Lama, and the list goes on and on. There would be so much to do in hell. To me hell would be alot more fun...And if we buy a state of the art air condition it will be even better. P.S. And the only station you would get in Heaven is TBN...Gag me with a chainsaw! I would not want to have to spend ETERNITY with all those people who claim they are the only ones going to Heaven, Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell, that Olsteen guy, Joyce Meyers. I'd just spend ETERNITY being really annoyed and pissed off, what kind of Heaven is that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lycorth Posted May 13, 2006 Share Posted May 13, 2006 Given the choice of going to Heaven and kissing Biblegodzilla's ass for all eternity of being pissed off at him, I'd choose the second - especially since all my friends and loved ones will be there. None of my family will get into the Xian heaven, not the way we live Of course, since I don't believe in Heaven-n-Hell, I know I won't go to either. Even better Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thackerie Posted May 13, 2006 Share Posted May 13, 2006 I'm with you. Bible god is a sadistic psycho. Who wants to spend eternity kissing his great, big, stinky cosmic ass!!! Anyway, as Bart Simpson once asked the sunday school teacher: "If you go to hell and burn for all eternity, wouldn't you kind of get used to it after awhile so it doesn't even bother you anymore?" Makes sense to me! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest JP Posted May 13, 2006 Share Posted May 13, 2006 I've said this before and I'll say it again. My version of Hell = Spending eternity with Christians. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nick5 Posted May 13, 2006 Share Posted May 13, 2006 I agree with the first post, I'd rather go to hell than be an hypocrite and praise someone who doesn't deserve it for eternity Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ryan Posted May 13, 2006 Share Posted May 13, 2006 I agree. I don't really want to live for an eternity anywhere, let alone with that SOB. And can you imagine how smug all the Christians would be up there having been "persecuted" for so long and now they get their time to brown nose for all eternity. Of course this is kind of a moot point since we might as well be discussing what it would be like to spend eternity working on a unicorn ranch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
monsterfeets Posted May 13, 2006 Share Posted May 13, 2006 Yeah, I've always thought I'd rather go to hell if all my friends and cool people would be there. I think you'd probably get used to all the pain and suffering too ;P. Christians argue that when you are sick and in pain it doesnt matter if your best friend is there because all you can focus on is the pain. But after a while of having your face melted off it's going to be routine. I'd rather be in pain and be with my loved ones than be at peace and be a lobotomized robot. Christians feel the opposite way although they don't word it like that. They'd rather be with God in Heaven than with their loved ones no matter what. And they're glad they wont care/be sad about them burning in hell when they are in heaven. That always seemed kind of ... selfish to me. (I know, some of them don't think that, but they'll still pick God over their family. That's what you're supposed to do you know!) Ofcourse I don't believe in (that particular) Hell, either. It's just too stupid to be true. Surely they could have come up with something more creative (and horrible and scary) than just burning forever. I mean what about having your eyes pulled out by fishing hooks or being shoved up Hitler's bum. Even Dante's version was kind of dry. Maybe they should bring in a redecorator, like Clive Barker. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jasonwhatever Posted May 14, 2006 Share Posted May 14, 2006 quote: I would not want to have to spend ETERNITY with all those people who claim they are the only ones going to Heaven, Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell, that Olsteen guy, Joyce Meyers. I'd just spend ETERNITY being really annoyed and pissed off, what kind of Heaven is that? Does anyone actually believe that Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell, Olsteen and Joyce Meyers are real Christians? Get real. When I was extremely devout, I saw that they were just false teacher and hypocrites using God's Name in vain for money......"there were many false teachers among the people, even as there shall be among you." "And through covetousness shall they with feigned words make merchandise of you, whose judgment of a long time lingereth not, and whose damnation slumbereth not." "An heart they have exercised with covetous practices, cursed children." They certainly are not approved of by God, if anything in The Bible is true. (And most, if not all, I believe, is.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lycorth Posted May 14, 2006 Share Posted May 14, 2006 jason, this thread is about Hell vs. spending eternity with Biblegodzilla, not about who is a True Xian or not. Every single verse you've mentioned is nebulous and can be applied to any Xian evangelist from any sect. Knocking them down doesn't improve your image or give credibility to your version of Xianity with us. If you don't have anything worthwhile to contribute to the thread's stated subject, then don't contribute at all Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike D Posted May 14, 2006 Share Posted May 14, 2006 All the cool people are going to hell, so I would rather go there. Come to think of it, I think being cool precludes you from going to heaven. So of course I won't be going there Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fweethawt Posted May 14, 2006 Share Posted May 14, 2006 When I die and go to hell, I'm going to look for Mark Twain. After a nice lengthy conversation and a cigar or two, I will fuck him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Emerson Posted May 14, 2006 Share Posted May 14, 2006 I always thought that heaven in revelations was actually kind of cool and beautiful. I am a sentimentalist and it would be kind of lovely if such a place existed with no threats of anyone going to hell except you know maybe hitler and other idiots like him. LMR, I just can't worship God out of fear and of the threat of hell hanging over my head. I can't worship, follow, or try to have a "relationship" with such a god. I just can't. It sounds lovely of the part that xtianity tries to sell, and that is, that God created the whole world and humans in his image, and that he wants to have a relationship with us. That true followers will get to heaven, where its a lovely place that God has "wonderful plans" that no eye has seen or no ear has heard. That sounds nice when you first look at it, or at least it did to me, but unfortunately its hell and other logical reasons that have turned me off xtianity. Deconversion for me was very painful. I felt like I could not live without my religion, my faith in the biblical god. It also meant that I had to let go of the ideas of heaven and of a relationship with god. Even if Jesus and God and the whole bible spiel existed, I just couldn't worship God out of fear. I don't want to do that, I just can't. I'm not going to be scared into following/worshipping/"knowing" god. No way. And maybe we shouldn't place our blame on a non-existent being and whatever else the myths of the bible and other religious holy texts are, maybe we should be angry with the people who have said that this is "truth" and try to force others their beliefs, like the writers and the leaders and the followers. The bible, is just a thing, its just a book, its only dangerous when people try to put it into action and tote is at the truth that all of mankind should live by. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Golden Meadows Posted May 14, 2006 Share Posted May 14, 2006 I've said this before and I'll say it again. My version of Hell = Spending eternity with Christians. According to St Thomas Aquinas one of the indirect joys of heaven is in seeing the sufferings of the dammed - nice people eh? If thats what heaven is like I don't think thats where I want to be, for the heaven of the "saints" seems more like hell to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LosingMyReligion Posted May 14, 2006 Author Share Posted May 14, 2006 I agree with all of you, except Jason, for the most part. I think being in the biblical heaven would be worse than living under the chains of Christianity on Earth. Think about it...You would be in the physical presence of Bible God. So you basically couldn't do anything aside from sing hymns and kiss his ass for all eternity...And even if you think the Angel of Death is cute you might risk starting a genocidal fit because God is offended. I remember once, a long time ago, there was a televangelist preaching about the death of Jeffery Dahmer. Well, to make a long story short Jeffery(a serial murderer and cannibal)is supposed to be in Heaven. Because Dahmer gave his life to Jesus when he got caught and put in jail... That is another reason I would rather goto hell. I would much rather hang out with Ghandi, Mark Twain, Langston Hughes, the Dali Lama, and all the other infidels as opposed to good Christians like Jeffery Dahmer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike D Posted May 14, 2006 Share Posted May 14, 2006 I remember once, a long time ago, there was a televangelist preaching about the death of Jeffery Dahmer. Well, to make a long story short Jeffery(a serial murderer and cannibal)is supposed to be in Heaven. Because Dahmer gave his life to Jesus when he got caught and put in jail... I read that too. Imagine Jeffrey Dahmer going to heaven to spend eternity with one of his victims that he ate I also read that David Berkowitz repented of his sins and turned his life over to Jesus while he was in the pokey. So between serial killers and washed up actors like Kirk Cameron and Stephen Baldwin, and buffoon televangelists like Jerry Falwell and Pat Roberts, I am just not seeing anything real enticing about heaven. And I suppose in hell we'll find everyone from Stephen Hawking to Madonna to Bill Gates to Jerry Springer to Paris Hilton to Metallica to Mike Tyson to Albert Einstein to Peewee Herman and more. Hell actually sounds like fun Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lycorth Posted May 14, 2006 Share Posted May 14, 2006 Yeah - Hell would have all the entertainment talent we'd ever need. After we got used to the heat, imagine the parties we'd have. And, of course, all the porn stars would be there, too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LosingMyReligion Posted May 14, 2006 Author Share Posted May 14, 2006 Yeah - Hell would have all the entertainment talent we'd ever need. After we got used to the heat, imagine the parties we'd have. And, of course, all the porn stars would be there, too Also, Tina Turner is going to hell too(she's a Buddhist). If anything hell is going to be a great rock and roll concert. The Rolling Stones, Beatles(well, atleast John Lennon because he was an athiest), and all those other great 70's bands...And the bonus is that there would be no Christian rockbands(ie: watered down "rock")... More importantly, since we'll all be dead we won't have to worry about dying of venereal diseases...ergo, hell could be an eternity long orgy. With all the hot porn stars there that would be really neat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LosingMyReligion Posted May 14, 2006 Author Share Posted May 14, 2006 I always thought that heaven in revelations was actually kind of cool and beautiful. I am a sentimentalist and it would be kind of lovely if such a place existed with no threats of anyone going to hell except you know maybe hitler and other idiots like him. LMR, I just can't worship God out of fear and of the threat of hell hanging over my head. I can't worship, follow, or try to have a "relationship" with such a god. I just can't. It sounds lovely of the part that xtianity tries to sell, and that is, that God created the whole world and humans in his image, and that he wants to have a relationship with us. That true followers will get to heaven, where its a lovely place that God has "wonderful plans" that no eye has seen or no ear has heard. That sounds nice when you first look at it, or at least it did to me, but unfortunately its hell and other logical reasons that have turned me off xtianity. Deconversion for me was very painful. I felt like I could not live without my religion, my faith in the biblical god. It also meant that I had to let go of the ideas of heaven and of a relationship with god. Even if Jesus and God and the whole bible spiel existed, I just couldn't worship God out of fear. I don't want to do that, I just can't. I'm not going to be scared into following/worshipping/"knowing" god. No way. And maybe we shouldn't place our blame on a non-existent being and whatever else the myths of the bible and other religious holy texts are, maybe we should be angry with the people who have said that this is "truth" and try to force others their beliefs, like the writers and the leaders and the followers. The bible, is just a thing, its just a book, its only dangerous when people try to put it into action and tote is at the truth that all of mankind should live by. Emerson, you articulated my pain regarding deconversion perfectly. It is VERY hard to let go. For me it came to the point where I began feeling like a phoney. Yes, I was going through the motions of going to church, reading my bible, and praying. However, I hated going to church on Sunday. I thought all of the pastors were morons, and I hardly believed the bible anymore(hardly at all now). That coupled with my sexuality helped me to rip away the christian band aid. It was there when I needed it(for personal healing and growth), but I eventually had to pull it off. What made me so angry about the faith is that, literally, everyone is going to be denied the oppurtunity to enjoy everlasting nirvana unless they are a Christian. That didn't sit right with me. And what really did it for me was the 2004 election. It helped me to see what Christianity really was...a huge industry the manipulates and milks the poor. I think of all the pain Christianity has caused so many people(myself included)and I can't, in my logical mind, be apart of it anymore. And the Bible itself reads like a book of gibberish. Grant it, I still believe in the supernatural...and I still believe that there is a heaven. However, I no longer believe in it in the biblical sense. To me the biblical God is just as evil as the satanic figure that he himself created(God is supposed to be good and filled with love, yet he created the most wicked force in all creation?)... Even though it hurt to let go I am so glad I did. Thanks for your post Emerson. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hatepirate Posted May 15, 2006 Share Posted May 15, 2006 But what about the shit demons!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Emerson Posted May 15, 2006 Share Posted May 15, 2006 LMR, No problem. Thanks for your sharing your experiences as well. Its good to know that I'm not alone. Homosexuality is another thing that got to me because my best friend in high school was bisexual, but I think she leaned more towards women than men. She would tell me about going on dates and everything, and that made me question things a lot. Oh yeah she was the daughter of a pastor, so that was a huge problem for her family. Anyway, I couldn't imagine my best friend going to hell. I just couldn't. Its not like she chose homosexuality, and why would God create someone in his image, and create someone gay and send them to hell? That just doesn't make sense. I've met a lot of nice gay people and I just can't imagine them going to hell. That's just wrong to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jasonwhatever Posted May 15, 2006 Share Posted May 15, 2006 I never enjoyed going to Church in my adult life; the pastors were all money-driven. They loved the sounds of their own voices. At the United Methodist Church I went to, they wanted to know where you worked, and then they tried to commit you to making a pledge to give "x" numbers of dollars a week. That way you would then be obligated more or less. And they would give everyone envelopes with a certain number assigned to us so that they could keep track of how much we gave. The first couple of weeks I attended, I didn't give much at all. So, they moved my number from like 65 to like 325 or something like that. I got a letter in the mail telling me that my envelope number had been changed. lol I would see the treasurer at Church and she would ask me how my job was going; it was obviously a veiled attempt at reminding me to give more money. In the meantime, the pastor lives in a $200,000 home and drives a fancy vehicle while I was living in an apartment and riding the bus. Personally, I don't think that a pastor should be paid any more than the average of his congregants. The outline given by the apostles is that all were to have all things equally in the Church. No one was to profit or have more than another. That is never followed today; the pastors get rich off the Gospel. The pastor there does very little....he gives one sermon about once a month. He gets up and reads short passages out of the Scripture and then does a very small speech about it. Usually, it is a lay person or another pastor or guest who speaks. I guess that was their way of telling me that I needed to give more money by changing the envelopes and asking me about my job. I also put down on my membership form that I do painting...of course, they saw this as a potential money-making opportunity. They asked me if I sell my paintings. lol I wonder why? Then for us newbies, the pastor got up and gave a speech about how we should all give as much as we could possibly give. When the plate was passed around, the jezebel female pastor would look around to see who was putting money in the plate. I didn't put anything, but my bf did. So afterwards she invited him to attend services, even though he's Jewish! I won't even get into all the millionaires there are out there, who are super rich from the gospel. The televangelists, etc. They are all a bunch of ignorant hypocrites. You'd have to be a fool to send them money. I imagine that if a tenth of the money that has been given to ministries and evangelists in the last 50 years had been used truly to spread the Gospel, every person on this earth would have heard it a hundred times over. Then never mind catholicism and all its wealth. No wonder why people are skeptical of Christianity....it's because it is filled with so many damned hypocrites of the worst kind. Sorry guys and gals, I did not mean to post this in this forum. I know it's off topic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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