Always Afraid!

[garrisonjj]

I always secretely disliked church and religion in general,,,but always dismissed those thoughts as sinful. Finally,,,I gave up religion and the idea of god over the last 5 months and I was always secretly afraid of guilt feelings. On the contrary! I have become more firm with my godlessness and feel better about it every day. Any similar experiences??? Thanks

[dulce]

I'm glad to hear you're comfortable with your thoughts. I know I had the same worries. Actually I just thought god would strike me dead for dare not believing. And when I just kept right on living, I thought.......hmmmm. I was involved in a very fundy cult and thought for sure the second I listened to secular music I was going to be in a horrific car accident! I think, how embarassing, now! But I've been out for 14 months now and have absolutely no belief in the xtian god and feel wonderful and smart! I'm glad you posted, though, because the longer I've been out the more intolerant I am to any xtian, no matter how much they lean to the left. I can't seem to get over my hatred of anyone that believes all that nonsense. Any thoughts on getting over this?

[godlessgrrl]

I've come to a point where I'm sometimes overly proud to be ungodly. (If that's possible, anyway...)

 

It is definitely a process. I'm at the place where if someone asks me if I believe in god, my answer is a resounding, smug "HELL no!" rather than a polite "I'd rather not discuss it" or a simple "No, I don't." Maybe I'll stay here forever, maybe not.

 

Welcome to freedom.

[LosingMyReligion]

Yeah, we all go through it. Think of it as your first step on the road to recovery.

 

I think, after three and a half months(The approximate length of my deconversion thus far), I'm finally letting go of the hell fears. The longer I stay away from Christianity the more I realize how damaging it was to me. And how silly it is altogether.

While I still haven't given up on the idea of God, my concept of what and who "god" is has expanded. Right now my whole belief system is in flux. So as of now, I'm trying something radical...believing in myself that I am capable of accomplishing things.

And even as I type that my old Christian thinking returns with, "Oh you better not say that! God is gonna punish and you'll have to turn back!"

Then I think, "Why the hell would I want to serve a god that would punish me for believing in myself?"

Do I still believe in a God(or omnipotent force)? Yes. Do I believe that force is the personal asshole in the bible?No.

 

So atleast I have it narrowed down to that.

[Vortex]

I still have vestigal fears of hell. It's irrational, I know - but it doesn't make it any less real.

 

I look at it this way. Any God who could with foreknowledge create a being it *knew* it was going to torture for all eternity is not a God worthy of worship.

 

If two parents were going to have a child and told their neighbors they were going to roast it over a slow fire when it turned two years old, what do you think would happen to them?

 

If we as humans, (if said humans are mentally sound), find this deplorable, how much more so would God?

 

Sounds like a good argument, huh? If I could only deprogram myself completely from the garbage they filled my head with as a kid....

[xrayman7040]

I know what you mean about the guilt, but it is soon replaced by the most liberating feeling of freedom imaginable, followed by noticing the pure comedy involved in watching religious fanatics in action, whether at home, work or on T.V. If I watch a sermon on T.V. now I just laugh my ass off so much, because of the absurdity of it all, espescially when they start asking for cash. (A fine example of one of these funny fucks would be the asshole pictured to the left.)

 

 

What you must do is keep hanging around this site and reinforce in your brain what everyone here knows, and it will soon become second nature to your brain that religion, sin, heaven, and hell are all bullshit.