Guest SerenityNow Posted July 13, 2005 Share Posted July 13, 2005 I'm so much happier now but am wondering if any of you have went through the following on this site. When I first started, I thought that my posts were not rude toward Christians. Now, after being here awhile, I'm finding myself being impatient and intolerant of some of the things said on this board. Did any of you do this at first? I feel so bad, my though provoking or in-depth posts have lately become short and sarcastic. I'm trying to change that. Your thoughts....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I Broke Free Posted July 13, 2005 Share Posted July 13, 2005 Thankful, Yes I do know how you feel. Sometimes I am just not in the mood to respond with a generous heart and I end up sounding short and sarcastic. After I make these kinds of posts, I wish I could go back and delete them. I tend to avoid the Debating Forum for just that reason. IBF Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Merlinfmct87 Posted July 13, 2005 Share Posted July 13, 2005 Oh my goodness gracious yes. It's happened to many members here - myself included. It gets to the point that family members were asking why I was so grumpy all the time. Walk away from the debate fourm for a little while, give your loved ones a hug, play some forum games, your patience will return. One person suggested studying a culture like the Aztecs - try to one-up Christianity in it's brutality and barbarism... dispell the illusion you build up that it's the worst of the worst. Merlin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ouroboros Posted July 13, 2005 Share Posted July 13, 2005 I feel I have to be rude once a day, but most of the time I can stop myself. Though I haven't really felt that way you describe - to be rude to all Christians - the feelings has truly been strong towards one or two of them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Checkmate Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 Thankful, Yes I do know how you feel. Sometimes I am just not in the mood to respond with a generous heart and I end up sounding short and sarcastic. After I make these kinds of posts, I wish I could go back and delete them. I tend to avoid the Debating Forum for just that reason. IBF Ditto!! I READ the debates, but I strain VERY hard to keep my fingers to myself. I get angry REAL easily with Xians. I leave the debates to cooler heads. I THINK it has something to do with trying to remain respectful of the person, WHILE simultaneously vomitting bile at their IDEAS (which we've already rejected). It's like trying to respect a person who favors ethnic cleansing, Nazism or the KKK. Sure they are entitled to their beliefs, but I sure as hell won't tolerate those beliefs as if they had some legitimacy! I ain't saying Xianity is like the KKK, just that the dynamic of how we Ex-C's respond to offensive views is similar. IMHO. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spamandham Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 I'm only rude to those few who have earned it after great effort, and on those rare occasions, I savor the flames as I inhale the aroma like a fine cigar. Your average "hi everyone, just give yourself to Jesus" types don't really bother me. Even the young earthers don't get under my skin. I pitty them, but they don't frustrate me. I consider thinly vieled threats (oh well, at least I'M going to heaven) to be extremely rude and deserving of quid pro quo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dulce Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 I'm pretty new here so I'm not sick of the christians yet. I do find their arguements all the same. But what I am finding is that it's getting harder and harder to research christianity. I like to research and since leaving a fundy church, I decided to research their history. But it seems like everytime I read the word "jesus" I slam the book shut! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LloydDobler Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 I'm so much happier now but am wondering if any of you have went through the following on this site. When I first started, I thought that my posts were not rude toward Christians. Now, after being here awhile, I'm finding myself being impatient and intolerant of some of the things said on this board. Did any of you do this at first? I feel so bad, my though provoking or in-depth posts have lately become short and sarcastic. I'm trying to change that. Your thoughts....... <{POST_SNAPBACK}> Yep. Pretty much the first year after declaring my apostacy I got more and more bitter and cranky towards them and anything related to christianity. I went off on a guy at my office who even though he's not a christian, suggested I might meet women at church. It's decreasing now. I feel more pity than anger these days. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ouroboros Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 I'm only rude to those few who have earned it after great effort, and on those rare occasions, I savor the flames as I inhale the aroma like a fine cigar. Your average "hi everyone, just give yourself to Jesus" types don't really bother me. Even the young earthers don't get under my skin. I pitty them, but they don't frustrate me. I consider thinly vieled threats (oh well, at least I'M going to heaven) to be extremely rude and deserving of quid pro quo. Agree. Btw, I tried my first one of the Acid cigars today. Very different. Have you tried it S&H? It's Drew Estate, ie. CAO (I think). http://www.acidcigars.com/ Anyway, my first pissed-off posting in a while was just 5 minutes ago, in the "Hell" topic. Self righteous prick assuming someone elses lack of belief... AAAARGH! http://www.ex-christian.net/index.php?show...indpost&p=48990 I just hate it when people assume that an ex-christian never was a true Christian. No one can make that judgment, and should never even think that. No one has the right to believe they have the sole true verification process to validates someone elses faith. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thurisaz Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 Your thoughts... Methinks that's pretty much a natural response to being confronted with the same braindead bullcrap every fucking day. I know it's the reason for me... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lunar Shadow Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 Methinks that's pretty much a natural response to being confronted with the same braindead bullcrap every fucking day. I know it's the reason for me... I would have to agree with you there Thurisaz I find myself growing tired of being bombarded with the same senseless bullshit by Christians It comes down to "Yes I am an Atheist... No, I tried and found it to be a crock... No I am not interested in coming back" It is this type of shit every day in one form or another. It is quite frustrating. I try not to be hateful but I know that it does come across that way sometimes. But sometimes annoyance can be mislabeled as hatred. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dogmatically_challenged Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 I haven't had my freedom from my aunt and relatives that long. I still resent them. I'm always angry at christians. I don't care. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vigile Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 Agree. Btw, I tried my first one of the Acid cigars today. Very different. Have you tried it S&H? It's Drew Estate, ie. CAO (I think). http://www.acidcigars.com/ Anyway, my first pissed-off posting in a while was just 5 minutes ago, in the "Hell" topic. Self righteous prick assuming someone elses lack of belief... AAAARGH! http://www.ex-christian.net/index.php?show...indpost&p=48990 I just hate it when people assume that an ex-christian never was a true Christian. No one can make that judgment, and should never even think that. No one has the right to believe they have the sole true verification process to validates someone elses faith. I'm pretty pissed off after reading that one to Hans. It looks like you are handling him well though so I won't run in and spout my momentary poison. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ouroboros Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 I'm pretty pissed off after reading that one to Hans. It looks like you are handling him well though so I won't run in and spout my momentary poison. Oh, I wouldn't mind. This is what I think of what that fundie said: That kind of statement he did is gross, That kind of statement I hate the most. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nirrti Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 Of all the times I've posted on forums, the only time I've verbally bitten someone's head off was when Christians deliberately insulted me. What's strange is that the only people to insult me in any web forum were Christians trying to convince folks that biblegod was loving. I hate being mean to anyone and getting into the debate forums was like another world to me as I couldn't understand how people could get so angry and be so quick to attack without real provocation. I've learned to make sure I had on my psychic bullet proof vest before stepping in to the debate section. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ouroboros Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 Of all the times I've posted on forums, the only time I've verbally bitten someone's head off was when Christians deliberately insulted me. What's strange is that the only people to insult me in any web forum were Christians trying to convince folks that biblegod was loving. I hate being mean to anyone and getting into the debate forums was like another world to me as I couldn't understand how people could get so angry and be so quick to attack without real provocation. I've learned to make sure I had on my psychic bullet proof vest before stepping in to the debate section. I remember that one frustration I had as a Christian and trying to witness was that I knew I didn't have answers to every argument or question that could pop up. It irritated me, and when a question came up like that, it bothered me, and the frustration sometimes came out as anger or harsh attitude. I felt (subconsiously) that my faith was threatened and it was some kind of passive/agressive reaction. But I tried to work on it, and figure out how I could establish a stronger faith and more knowledge so it didn't have to happen. And the only thing I could see was that only when I really believed something, then I wouldn't be so afraid to be confronted. And I got to that point, which meant that it didn't bother me if someone questioned, I could calmly say that I didn't know. But I noticed that there was an awful lot of "I don't knows". Anyway, the anger you can see in Christians, IMO, is based on the subconscious threat they feel, that their religion and belief would be shaken because you don't accept their explanations. Now, I don't feel that way. The only anger I feel now is not that I'm afraid to become a faith person again, but more how people can be so arrogant and insensitive. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spamandham Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 Btw, I tried my first one of the Acid cigars today. Very different. Have you tried it S&H? It's Drew Estate, ie. CAO (I think). I have more cigars than I have humidor space right now, so I haven't tried anything new in a while, but they do look interesting. Anyway, my first pissed-off posting in a while was just 5 minutes ago, in the "Hell" topic. Self righteous prick assuming someone elses lack of belief... AAAARGH! That pisses me off too. On another board I've been having a discussion with a guy who claims he has zero doubt about god, and that all True Christians also have 0 doubt. He pulled this out as a trump card in a discussion regarding faith and cognitive dissonance. I'm tempted to just call him a liar, but then I'd be violating my own rule of never claiming to know more about someone else than they know about themsleves. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mythra Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 I struggle with this every day here. I feel insulted by people who shoot out scripture like a flame thrower to see how many apostates they can scorch. Like we have never opened a bible. I was tied up in knots over christianity for so many years. And I had such an internal war and anguish over leaving. This has been THE major struggle of my life for 25 years. Shove it in my face now, and watch the instant asshole appear. Fuck em. Take the abuse or leave. Or, get back in my face, whatever. If they want lollipops and pardon-me's, then they should go back and hang out in the christian forums. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ouroboros Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 I have more cigars than I have humidor space right now, so I haven't tried anything new in a while, but they do look interesting. It is a terrible problem... It means you have to smoke more in shorter time! That pisses me off too. On another board I've been having a discussion with a guy who claims he has zero doubt about god, and that all True Christians also have 0 doubt. He pulled this out as a trump card in a discussion regarding faith and cognitive dissonance. I'm tempted to just call him a liar, but then I'd be violating my own rule of never claiming to know more about someone else than they know about themsleves. I will more and more attack these kinds of people with "you are NO true Christian right NOW". Just to piss them off instead. But then, like you said, I don't like to presume what people believe or not. I like to give people the benefit of the doubt (call it naive if you want to), but that's how I am. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mythra Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 One other thing, though. I have found this forum to be such a wonderful place for me to be able to express outrage or frustration or irreverence. It doesn't spill over into my normal life. If you saw how I am really, you'd say, you're Mythra? No freakin way. I'm never rude to anyone. Maybe this is the real me, and I'm just phony in real life. In any case, I feel better after venting. Like that awesome rant that Thankful did a few weeks ago. There is just so much pent up anger inside, it's good to let it out sometimes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotter Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 Quote from you Thankful: When I first started, I thought that my posts were not rude toward Christians. Now, after being here awhile, I'm finding myself being impatient and intolerant of some of the things said on this board. Thankful, I substitute yours with Amanda, a Christian forum member: When Amanda first started, Amanda’s posts were not rude towards non-Christians. Now, after being here awhile, we found Amanda being impatient and intolerant of some of the things said on this board. Thankful, just yesterday morning we read Amanda lashing out on Madame_M. Nothing personal Amanda, I am merely illustrating that this curve happens to anyone. You will be fine Thankful. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alice Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 Thankful, I think the fact that you have noticed a change in the way you post and want to tackle it - it evidence of your inherent good nature. Anger is part of loss - and although you are pleased to be free of your religion - it is still a loss, and even if you are no longer grieving - conversations with christians who hold the beliefs you once held are likely to trigger those emotions again. I guess I don't agree with the posts that carry the sentiment - christians are stupid and arrogant so f**k 'em. I really don't like rudeness and insults - and such behaviour from some of the christians makes me angry as well - it's just that I think being rude back is rarely the answer. I love what Merlin says ... Oh my goodness gracious yes. It's happened to many members here - myself included. It gets to the point that family members were asking why I was so grumpy all the time. Walk away from the debate fourm for a little while, give your loved ones a hug, play some forum games, your patience will return. One person suggested studying a culture like the Aztecs - try to one-up Christianity in it's brutality and barbarism... dispell the illusion you build up that it's the worst of the worst. Merlin <{POST_SNAPBACK}> .... although I find it hard to imagine him being grumpy with his family! He's so right! there is no point in letting it effect you too much. I'm a firm believer in holding onto things that are good - and I apply this to my time in the church as well - and although I'm sure this teaching isn't exclusive to christianity - it is where I learnt it - and that's 'a gentle answer turns away wrath'. Not that I always manage it! I mostly feel sorrow for christians who are caught in the loop of their circular beliefs and can't find a way out, because I was there too. I cringe when I see people call christians 'stupid' or cuss them too much, because I think sometimes they are rude because their beliefs are being challenged and that is a scary place to be (and some of them are just kids really) I think respectful is the way to go - and sometimes that includes pointing out that posters have been rude and insulting (I don't think we should accept insults and let them go - I just can't see the point in being rude back) beyond that use the ignore function! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a midnight star Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 I am very new here. I know that sometimes I feel like I have an ax to grind. If a christian is just stateing their view point, that is one thing. I have a problem with those who think that they are gong to judge me. But then again, I am very bitter with chistanity and the god of the christians. I have recieved nothing but hurt and pain from those ... SO maybe, now that I finished writing, I should have kept my opinion to myself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christopher Carrion Posted July 16, 2005 Share Posted July 16, 2005 Personally, I find talking to many of the Christians who post here very much like talking to children, or people with educational difficulties. They assume to know much about which they know little, and for the most part further promote this ridiculous preconception that Christians somehow are more fundamentally well informed concerning the faith for being inculcated into it. This makes me angry. I've never been Christian, but I will gladly go toe to toe with any who is or has been concerning the psychological, perceptual and behavioural templates the ideology promotes in its adherents in order to promote itself, because I have taken such efforts to examine the phenomena from WITHOUT, in other words, OBJECTIVELY. Intellectual disingenuousness also makes me very, very angry. I don't feel obliged to patience or tolerance when someone spews what is evidently rubbish as evidence or justification for their beliefs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vixentrox Posted July 16, 2005 Share Posted July 16, 2005 I'm so much happier now but am wondering if any of you have went through the following on this site. When I first started, I thought that my posts were not rude toward Christians. Now, after being here awhile, I'm finding myself being impatient and intolerant of some of the things said on this board. Did any of you do this at first? I feel so bad, my though provoking or in-depth posts have lately become short and sarcastic. I'm trying to change that. Your thoughts....... <{POST_SNAPBACK}> I thought the same thing about myself...but, after talking about it with folks, decided I didn't need to walk on eggshells for Xtians. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts