Here I Am, 23 Years Old, And I Have Never Kissed A Girl

[Thank God I'm Atheist]

I was curious about other ex-fundamentalist Christians who were true to their chastity vows as a Christian to the point of insanity. That is, like me, they did not even kiss a member of the opposite sex.

Well, I became an atheist over the past 6 months, so the sensual act of "kissing" is no longer reserved for marriage anymore. LOL. Thus, I just turned 23, and I have yet to even kiss a girl.

 

Just curious is anyone else was in a similar situation.

[Margee]

Welcome - welcome my friend! I can't wait till you post and tell us about your first kiss!!You will - won't you?

I am so glad you are here.

 

I have heard this type of story before - you are definitely not alone! and you have come to the right place for support!

 

good luck in this new journey! It's goona be sooooooo fun!

[MrsRobinson]

Well I WAS in that same mindframe until I caved and had pre-marital sex. And I thought I had tremendous will power. You should be proud you held out so long and that when you make a decision, you have the strength to make it final. That will work in your favour in many areas of your life. Although, I didnt think kissing was bad so that didnt bother me. Besides, all they did in the OT was go in a tent to have sex and then marriage was final. Whats the difference if youre going to marry the person now. OK I wouldnt want my husband to rent a tent, but you get what Im saying.

[Knetti]

I've never heard of not even kissing until marriage, but trust me, it's not the end of the world. (And who am I to say that being 20 and not even a virgin.) But seriously, bide your time. You've only recently deconverted. You don't have to experience everything right away that you weren't able to as a Christian.

[Thank God I'm Atheist]

Welcome - welcome my friend! I can't wait till you post and tell us about your first kiss!!You will - won't you?

I am so glad you are here.

 

I have heard this type of story before - you are definitely not alone! and you have come to the right place for support!

 

good luck in this new journey! It's goona be sooooooo fun!

 

If it ever happens I will! lol, I'm a bit of a loner, which is probably why I was able to hold out as long as I did.

[cobrakai]

You are not alone my friend. I gravitated towards Christianity because I was very shy as a teen. I already didn't seem a part of the world so to be a part of a belief system that told me to shun "the world" seemed like a good fit. I was never told kissing was wrong but because of my shyness coupled with my new found beliefs I didn't kiss a girl until 23 as well. I didn't lose my virginity until 29 AFTER I finally broke free from the shackles of Christianity at 28. Christianity truly robs you of ife and all the great things it has to offer. HA HA so don't take 6 years after you get that kiss. Enjoy life man, you just have to be smart about it!

[Eugene39]

Let's see: I was 20 when I first held a girl's hand or kissed her. I did hold her hand before we got engaged, but didn't kiss her until our engagement. And obviously, no pre-marital sex, and was 21 when we got married. I can't tell you how proud my mom was of me.

[melonies]

I'm in a similar situation: I'm 24, and I've kissed one girl exactly once, and that was due to a game of 'truth or dare'...

However, I've never taken a chastity vow, I guess they are less common in Europe.

 

If it ever happens I will! lol, I'm a bit of a loner, which is probably why I was able to hold out as long as I did.

So it's not entirely clear to me whether you were able to hold out as long as you did because you're 'a loner' or because you religously (literally ;-) ) kept your vow.

 

But hey, you've only just deconverted. Give it time, socialize and I'm sure you won't have to wait for too long.

 

Not too long ago I would have added: "I'll pray for you" ;-)

[foolish girl]

You need a few drinks an a loose woman to practice on! lol.....Seriously, just go to a party and announce "Never been kissed!"....then they will fix you right up!

[litassio]

Get married and raise a family, you will have plenty of chances to kiss left and right!

Don't worry about religion but worry about your mind, you have only one mind and you can take it into bliss or into hell.

Animal life is for animals and for human losers.

[foolish girl]

Get married and raise a family, you will have plenty of chances to kiss left and right!

Don't worry about religion but worry about your mind, you have only one mind and you can take it into bliss or into hell.

Animal life is for animals and for human losers.

 

Who is the loser?

Getting kissed, or giving kisses is not equal to animal life.

ANYWAY. We are animals. We are mammals. The sexual reproduction, the brain structures, the flesh, the birth life and death. Eating drinking, nursing (mother's milk), killing (aggression)

All Animal.

We just have foresight, creativity, and self-perception.

[Thank God I'm Atheist]

I'm in a similar situation: I'm 24, and I've kissed one girl exactly once, and that was due to a game of 'truth or dare'...

However, I've never taken a chastity vow, I guess they are less common in Europe.

 

If it ever happens I will! lol, I'm a bit of a loner, which is probably why I was able to hold out as long as I did.

So it's not entirely clear to me whether you were able to hold out as long as you did because you're 'a loner' or because you religously (literally ;-) ) kept your vow.

 

But hey, you've only just deconverted. Give it time, socialize and I'm sure you won't have to wait for too long.

 

Not too long ago I would have added: "I'll pray for you" ;-)

 

I had a chance, but I passed it up. Not that I regret it, she was known for sleeping around, and I'd just as soon not worry about STD's.

Even so, I see myself as the kind that might never get married. Sex isn't the whole world to me likes it seems to be for so many, and with divorce and cheating so rampant, I'm not sure it's worth the headache.

[Thank God I'm Atheist]

You need a few drinks an a loose woman to practice on! lol.....Seriously, just go to a party and announce "Never been kissed!"....then they will fix you right up!

 

Considering Myers-Briggs penned me 93% introvert, I don't think I'll be doing that anytime soon...

[Thank God I'm Atheist]

Get married and raise a family, you will have plenty of chances to kiss left and right!

Don't worry about religion but worry about your mind, you have only one mind and you can take it into bliss or into hell.

Animal life is for animals and for human losers.

 

No worries, litassio. When Anubis brings our souls to the Hall of Half Truths, chances are we'll both be sent to the Great Swallower for eternity. Of course, we could always pray that Osiris lets us in to Eternal Paradise instead. I'll put it on my prayer list.

[Thank God I'm Atheist]

Get married and raise a family, you will have plenty of chances to kiss left and right!

Don't worry about religion but worry about your mind, you have only one mind and you can take it into bliss or into hell.

Animal life is for animals and for human losers.

 

No worries, litassio. When Anubis brings our souls to the Hall of Half Truths, chances are we'll both be sent to the Great Swallower for eternity. Of course, we could always pray that Osiris lets us in to Eternal Paradise instead. I'll put it on my prayer list.

 

Hall of Two Truths. My bad. I'm sure Ra understands, though.

[foolish girl]

You need a few drinks an a loose woman to practice on! lol.....Seriously, just go to a party and announce "Never been kissed!"....then they will fix you right up!

 

Considering Myers-Briggs penned me 93% introvert, I don't think I'll be doing that anytime soon...

 

Got it. i am sure your time will come. Naturally

[ptd006]

Relax. No need to get desperate. As melonies said, spend some time socialising. Just enjoy other people's company and get to know them a bit. Have some fun hanging out and discussing stuff. Understand that just being able to have open and honest conversations with people you find 'attractive' is valuable in itself, even without sex. Don't approach every girl (or boy!) you find attractive aiming for fucking as the end game. Gradually you can build up to touching and kissing. It's actually not such a big deal and comes quite naturally.

 

A general comment: some single christians I've chatted to have porn problems. This applies especially to the introverted and socially anxious. In my opinion, porn creates a warped picture of sex and is not helpful for guys looking for real intimacy. I'm glad I ditched it.

 

[Disclaimer: I'm not an expert on this, I was just in your situation earlier this year]

[Overcame Faith]

As others have suggested, just let it be natural. Get out and meet some women and don't put expectations on yourself or on them. If you ask a woman out for coffee, just have a nice conversation and the same for a more formal date, like out to dinner and/or a movie. If the kiss comes, then go with it. I'm sure you'll like it if you also like the woman (and so will she if she likes you).

[litassio]

Don't do it, protect your purity of mind and your virginity and get married as soon as you can to a moral person.

[foolish girl]

Don't do it, protect your purity of mind and your virginity and get married as soon as you can to a moral person.

 

Don't do WHAT? Have a date. Give a kiss?

 

good grief

[decafaholic]

This all sounds very familiar.

 

After I deconverted, it's like I suddenly discovered the opposite sex! All the stuff normal girls do when they're in middle school (gossiping about boys, flirting) I didn't start til age 19. It goes without saying that I never kissed anyone until I had my first boyfriend a year later.

 

Before, I don't know why I wasn't that interested. I expect it was a combination of all the adults in my life telling me boys were evil creatures who only wanted sex and the fact that there were very few boys at my school. Plus, my best friends didn't date either so I never felt left out. Oh, and all the "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" crap. Joshua Harris has fucked up so many impressionable teenagers.

 

But hey,I made up for lost time, so it's all good!

[MagickMonkey]

No one seems to have brought it up, but there is NOTHING wrong with having sex for the sake of having sex. Meaningless sex is ok. It is not a substitute for real intimacy, but so what. A quarter pounder from Mc Donalds is no substitute for the burgers I can cook on my grill, but I still enjoy eating them. Sex fucking rocks. If you feel so inclined, fucking go for it, dude. Unprotected meaningless sex is, of course, a bad idea. Also, having meaningless sex with someone under the pretence of wanting a meaningful relationship IS WRONG. But there are plenty of sluts out there who are happy to have meaningless sex.

 

Of course, meaningless sex isn't for everybody. While I wouldn't mind occasional meaningless sex if I were single, monogamy has been pretty good for me. Some people simply do not want meaningless sex. Maybe it is not right for you. But I see no reason why we should view meaningless sex as immoral so long as those involved take proper precautions and are honest with each other.

[SilentLoner]

I'm female, 23 and in the same boat (haven't gone beyond kissing a guy on the cheek).

[SilentLoner]

Don't do it, protect your purity of mind and your virginity and get married as soon as you can to a moral person.

 

LOL.

 

What I learned in Catholic school - sex is a disgusting, selfish and moral abomination that should be shared only with someone you fall in love with and marry.

[Vomit Comet]

I was curious about other ex-fundamentalist Christians who were true to their chastity vows as a Christian to the point of insanity. That is, like me, they did not even kiss a member of the opposite sex.

Well, I became an atheist over the past 6 months, so the sensual act of "kissing" is no longer reserved for marriage anymore. LOL. Thus, I just turned 23, and I have yet to even kiss a girl.

 

Just curious is anyone else was in a similar situation.

 

I was in that situation until I turned 27. Thanks for nothing, Jesus! And let me tell you, finally getting laid did more for my mental health than Christianity ever did.

 

By the way, you qualify as someone who is in a state of "involuntary celibacy." Follow the link:

 

incelsupport.org

 

Overcoming the mind virus is the best thing you could have done for your love life, but I hope that you're not stuck in an enduring rut. Here's to you getting kissed/laid within one year.