willybilly30 Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 Ever thanksgiving my family sits at the table while my grandpas brotherin law Says a prayer. Prayers usually don’t tick me off. But this one line he says does. ‘Please save the lost’ I don’t want to pray like that the last damn thing I want to do is pray god makes people find Christianity. What would you do? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dianka Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 I said pretend to pray. Willy, I think you have to sort through your own feelings about God before you talk to your family, who I am guessing is mostly Christian. I know my heart starts pumping a little faster when my family gets down with the praying, but I calm down when I think about the fact that a few of them are immense hypocrites (adulterers, liars, alcoholics, etc.). When they are praying just concentrate on how good the turkey is going to be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluesman Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 Pretend to pray. It's one thing to make a big scene on the internet, a classroom, or around a bunch of co-workers. But why be an asshole around family? Besides, they know where I stand, why fuck up a tradition that means something to them? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ro-bear Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 Just sit in tolerant, respectful silence as those around you pray. I respect the decisions of others regarding these prickly situations, but I would never pretend to pray. Why mirror the hypocrisy we see in others? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vigile Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 Just sit in tolerant, respectful silence as those around you pray. I respect the decisions of others regarding these prickly situations, but I would never pretend to pray. Why mirror the hypocrisy we see in others? Yeah, I just sit there with my eyes open and mouth shut. Why make a scene, but why pretend either? I hate it when they hold hands though. What are you going to do, refused to hold your mother's hand? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lizard Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 I was thinking about this yesterday..the "Thanksgiving Prayer"..and came up with one of my own, which I'll most likely not say, but just might..in my mind: "Thank you to ***school district for providing the job that gave me the paycheck and also to ***moving and storage and ****relocation services for the other paychecks that allow us to buy our own food. And thank you to the government for providing the school district that provides the job. And the parents of the kids who send their kids to the school...also helping to create a need for me to have a job." Growing up, we never had prayer at any meal. As an adult, it was somewhat odd for me to see. Even when I was a believer, it just seemed somehow weird to thank gawd for providing, when I was the one out there working my ass off to get the pay to buy the stuff! But, back to the OP. If I were to be at my SIL's house, I would just stand quietly. Not sure what's gonna happen here, I don't even have a turkey yet. But, hubby wants ham, knowing I can't eat pork..or beef, for that matter. Then again, if I go to Whole Foods..and get the organic one, I might be ok..(something in the regular commercial pork and beef makes me ill,where the organic doesn't seem to be as bad. But its so expensive!) My husband seems to have this need to continue tradition that his mother did..and that is to pray before these "big" meals. That's twice, maybe three times a year. Considering that most of our "holidays" turn into some kind of argument, fight, brawl anyway, I ain't adding no stress to it by making a fuss out of meaningless words. (There will be plenty of meaningless words during/after the meal anyway) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dianka Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 Just sit in tolerant, respectful silence as those around you pray. I respect the decisions of others regarding these prickly situations, but I would never pretend to pray. Why mirror the hypocrisy we see in others? How fantastic for you that you have a family that allows respectful silence while the rest of the family prays. I, on the other hand would probably end up having to walk out of the house for the evening to avoid the screaming from all directions that I am sure would be the result of my respectful silence. My family is crazy, but it is the only family I have. I would rather avoid the fallout; who cares if I am mirroring negative behavior. A long time ago (I was probably about 15 at the time) I confessed to a close family member of mine that I did not want to be a Catholic anymore and he locked me in a room in his house until I told him I was still a Catholic. If Willy's family is as tolerant as mine is, I would say lie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sofia Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 I will always strive to keep peace. Happy thanksgiving to all of you. I hope you have a wonderful day with friends and family. We indeed, have so much to be thankful for. Sofi Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Foxy Methoxy Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 No big deal. Just hold hands and bow your head. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bongo Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 Ordinarily, I'd say just pretend to pray. HOwever, this time, we're going out to a restaurant for txgiving. My inlaws are the type who will hold hands and pray in public. I say, why stop there? Why dont we use the bathroom in plain view of all the noisy patrons too? It's a thing just as private, in my opinion. But in any case, what I'll do is hold hands, but keep my head up and my eyes open. I will stare at the crowd in defiance. Anyone watching will know I'm a rebel. Maybe one of my brothers in law will meet my eyes while the others are embarassing themselves in public. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dianka Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 Bongo, I would just like to tell you that of all the people who post on this site, I feel sorry for you the most. My heart goes out brother, I hope that wife of yours comes to her senses someday.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vigile Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 HOwever, this time, we're going out to a restaurant for txgiving. My inlaws are the type who will hold hands and pray in public. I say, why stop there? Why dont we use the bathroom in plain view of all the noisy patrons too? It's a thing just as private, in my opinion. Maybe you can do what the PromiseKeeper's infiltrator in Curtdude's thread today (sorry, I'm lazy to go look for it). Get really enthusiastic: "YEEEESSSS Lord! Amen! Jesus and USA! Jesus and USA! Evil is taking hold of the world! YEESSSS Lord!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest tonymaratin Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 HOwever, this time, we're going out to a restaurant for txgiving. My inlaws are the type who will hold hands and pray in public. I say, why stop there? Why dont we use the bathroom in plain view of all the noisy patrons too? It's a thing just as private, in my opinion. But in any case, what I'll do is hold hands, but keep my head up and my eyes open. I will stare at the crowd in defiance. Anyone watching will know I'm a rebel. Maybe one of my brothers in law will meet my eyes while the others are embarassing themselves in public. ....just say to yourself "shut the f*ck up you arseholes" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Foxy Methoxy Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 Yeah. Bow your head. Squint, raise one hand to heaven, and give a lot of hallalujahs, amens, and praise Jeeeeezus-uh throughout the course of the prayer! Then fake an orgasm. Or better yet, give yourself a real one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jose Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 I usually ask to lead the prayer and I say this little ditty... no one seems to notice that I'm not mentioning God. "My family. Thank you so much for gathering here, in peace and happiness, in safety and in comfort. There are so many deserving people with whom we could share this feast, but I can think of none that would bring me as much joy than those sitting around me right now. Thank you all so much for making this moment a memory and this day one so filled with love." They say "Amen!" and I say, "Stuffing. Now." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amethyst Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 I just pretend to pray. It's not worth starting an argument over, IMHO. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amethyst Posted November 23, 2005 Share Posted November 23, 2005 Whether a person pretends or just holds hands but doesn't pray will not ruin thanksgiving. However, I wouldn't confront on the issue, it should be a peaceful time. Just be thankful that it only comes once a year. Actually, it comes at least 3 times, if you count Christmas and Easter. More than that if you are like me and see your religious relatives several other times during the year, as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
willybilly30 Posted November 23, 2005 Author Share Posted November 23, 2005 I usually just bow my head and be quiet. The save the lost part disgusts me but im just going to be quiet about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eponymic Posted November 24, 2005 Share Posted November 24, 2005 Luckily, I don't have to worry about it, I'm not hangin' with any Christians this T-Day Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fweethawt Posted November 24, 2005 Share Posted November 24, 2005 I'm still waiting for the opportunity to say, "God damn I'm hungry. Let's eat!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
willybilly30 Posted November 24, 2005 Author Share Posted November 24, 2005 That’s what I want to say I practicly starve anyway they got a strange custom of waiting till everyone gets to the table. Some assholes come hours late! I'm still waiting for the opportunity to say, "God damn I'm hungry. Let's eat!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karissa Posted November 24, 2005 Share Posted November 24, 2005 Just sit in tolerant, respectful silence as those around you pray. How fantastic for you that you have a family that allows respectful silence while the rest of the family prays. I, on the other hand would probably end up having to walk out of the house for the evening to avoid the screaming from all directions that I am sure would be the result of my respectful silence. My family is crazy, but it is the only family I have. I would rather avoid the fallout; who cares if I am mirroring negative behavior. If Willy's family is as tolerant as mine is, I would say lie. I believe that respectful silence is the best...don't join in the group amen at the ending either. I believe that individuals that attempt to hide who they are or alter it for certain people create dissonance between their beliefs and their actions. It is psychologically healthy to express who you are and not compromise your beliefs, and you can do this without being disrespectful. In the case of parents that would scream at a their child for not joining in a prayer, I would really question the quality of any visits with this family. People, family or not, should respect you and your boundaries- I am sure screaming is not something anyone wants to experience. If your family screams at you about your beliefs and practices, maybe you should consider whether you should spend time with them. Even family should earn the privelege to spend time with you by respecting who you are and what you believe. If they don't do that, you should maybe consider witholding visiting. And, please don't shoot me, these are just my thoughts on the matter- just hoping to be able to help someone be able to be who they are Best wishes for the holidays. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sofia Posted November 24, 2005 Share Posted November 24, 2005 And, please don't shoot me, these are just my thoughts on the matter- just hoping to be able to help someone be able to be who they are Best wishes for the holidays. Where is my gun?? Just kidding! Happy Holidays to you, too! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorthenSun Posted November 24, 2005 Share Posted November 24, 2005 I will always strive to keep peace. Happy thanksgiving to all of you. I hope you have a wonderful day with friends and family. We indeed, have so much to be thankful for. Sofi I agree with you Sofia, there is much to be thankful for. Most notably there are some small indications that there may be an end to this insane war in Iraq. The pressure to finish this fruitless occupation is slowly building. Hopefully the troops will be home before the 2006 elections and the Sunnis and Shiites can find some path to ease their differences. I wish everyone a most Happy Thanksgiving! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thurisaz Posted November 24, 2005 Share Posted November 24, 2005 Outside of fundieland, option #1 should be the best. I know it's the one I will take, but then, I'm definitely not in fundieland... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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