Jump to content

An Apology And An Explanation, But No Excuses.


bornagainathiest
 Share

Recommended Posts

Posted Yesterday, 07:55 PM

 

snapback.pngbornagainathiest, on 02 August 2012 - 12:35 PM, said:

 

Thank you for your measured response Ouroboros.

You mean like your 3 or 4 posts with oversize big blue letters? That's argument from SCREAMING. And it's a fallacy. A claim isn't made true because you're putting it on a billboard and screaming it from the rooftops.

 

 

Quote

 

I think I see where I stand now

Your response above says another thing.

 

 

Quote

 

But please take back the attention whore label. I resent that.

Then don't call people trolls in fucking big blue letters to call attention to your shouting. Perhaps I should say it in even bigger letters... because then it must be true.

 

I don't think you seriously understand that this part of the website is for discussion of theological issues and not the free-for-all lion's den. There's a difference. And if you can't understand the difference, then you shouldn't participate in this part of the website. Stay in the lion's den if screaming "TROLL" is your forté.

 

 

Quote

 

Using different colors and large letters is something I've done since I joined up, so this is not a recent, attention-seeking exercise on my part.

Colors is fine. But blowing them up in 48 pt size and just calling someone names... No. That's not what you have been doing in the past.

 

And again, for the 10th time. THIS SECTION HERE IS IN A FORUM CALLED "GENERAL THEOLOGICAL ISSUES" and not "LET'S CALL PEOPLE NAMES IN FUCKING BIG LETTERS." It's not anyone's AD HOMINEM BILLBOARD.

 

SO NO! That's NOT what you've been doing in the past. This is the first time I've seen you do it, and I nicely asked you to stop and you challenged it by making claims that you can't question the Christians. What the HELL? Big fucking colored letters for billboarding "YOU'RE A TROLL" is a serious method of discussion?

 

 

With that said. This thread has lost its value and function so I'm locking it down.

 

And hopefully everyone else understands that ARGUMENT FROM SCREAMING in "General Theological Issues" is NOT OKAY.

 

 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

I would like to sincerely apologize to everyone affected by my inexcusable behavior in the Theological Discussions section, specifically, the thread entitled, "Killing in the Name of Atheism".

 

I was totally out of line and regret my actions and I would like to withdraw everything that I wrote that is unreasonable, offensive and in blatant contravention of the letter and the spirit of this forum's guidelines.

 

As mentioned above, what I did was inexcusable.

However, I would like to offer an explanation for this episode and ask everyone to understand that I am currently experiencing extreme emotional upset and anger management issues.

 

Living, as I do, in small community I cannot help but run into members of the Evangelical church that I used to be part of. A little while ago I encountered someone from that church who I will refer to as E. After a little small talk he offered his condolences over the death of my mother ( just over two months ago) and began to quiz me about the circumstances leading up to her final moments of life.

 

I politely asked him to cease and desist, but E ploughed right on, pressing me to know if mom had finally accept Jesus as her savior and lord before she died. With growing distress I pointed out that in the last weeks, she had ceased to recognize me was even unable to recognize any human face that entered her field of vision. She was dying of severe Dementia and her faculties were shutting down. I expressed the opinion that a deathbed acceptance of Jesus wouldn't have been possible.

 

E's face fell and then he muttered, "So then there's no hope for her." (He and mom had been good friends until I de-converted.)

 

My response to this was to say loudly, "You'd better not be about to say what I think you're going to say and you'd better not even be thinking it!"

 

"I can't help what God's word says about what happens to sinners who never accept Jesus" he countered. "You know your Bible as well as me... or at least you did, until you fell away."

 

"Don't go there!" I shouted at him.

 

E didn't listen. The man whom I'd once respected as a fellow brother in Christ not only told me that my mom would be joining my dad and my brother in Hell, but he also added that my fate was to be there with them.

 

I couldn't take any more and turned away, shaking with anger, disgust and shock.

 

While driving back home I was screaming and crying and filling the car with the foulest curses I could rain down on every Christian everywhere. I pounded the hub of the steering wheel so hard that the airbag inside it exploded in my face. Fortunately I was only yards from home and managed to get into the driveway. Only then did I see that the explosion had torn a gash in my hand and blood was pouring out, all over my legs and the seat.

 

After dressing the wound I logged on to this forum.

 

I was already pissed off with End3's previous replies and all the anger and hurt of my meeting with E was directed at him and later at Ouroboros and Antlerman. That was why I was 'screaming' in huge, multicolored letters.

 

Rage. Frustration. Disgust. Revulsion.

 

It all came pouring out.

 

This explains why I wrote what I did, but it does not excuse it. It only puts it into the proper context, so that, perhaps, others may better understand it.

 

I'm sorry for what I did.

 

With regret,

 

BAA.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I understand your frustration, man. Anyone would be irritable after that. I hold no ill will towards you.

Just try to remember that these idiots hold no power over you.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The saddest thing is that your asshole friend probably sees it very differently. He probably went home and lamented to his family how hard it is to tell unpleasasnt truths to a friend, but Jesus demands honest witnesses and God doesn't give any man more than he can handle. But maybe by upsetting you he was the instrument of your salvation through Jesus Christ amen. Hallelujah! Your friend is a regular Christian martyr, he is.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Sounds like it's time to get rid of this so called 'friend'. It's extremely abusive to tell another person that loved ones they have lost or will lose in the future will 'burn in hell.' Even if they think it's true they shouldn't be saying it, but they don't care how cruel they're being. If someone does the same to me I can tell you they'll likely be leaving with a few less teeth if not on a stretcher!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It is very presumptuous for any person to think they know the mind of God so well that they can say there is "no hope." That's bullshit. They don't know jack-shit; they are just being self-righteous jerks.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I was not involved in that thread,but I can say that I have been where you are at BA. When you are hurting like that it is easy to lose focus.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

*hugs*

 

Christianity is full of black and white emotional thinking. Calm, reasonable adult discussions are full of grey areas. It took me a long time to figure out how to be able to think in shades of grey without panic, anger, guilt, or fear. I used to feel unsure of myself and afraid every time I heard an emotional pastor on the radio, because, you know, he really really feels strongly about it. How could anyone with that powerful of an emotion be so wrong?

 

It sounds to me like you're surrounded by assholes who can't tell the difference between emotions and logic (which means that not only do they use emotions when they think they're using logic, but they can't parse human emotions well enough to know how not to be a jerk). I'm not sure exactly how to express what I'm trying to say here, but here goes: I hope you get some time away from such people, and maybe even some time with sane people, so that you can see how much nicer life is with people who understand the difference. I hope you feel safe enough on this forum that you discover that it's ok to have disagreements with other people without needing to feel defensive about it; no one here will think you're going to hell for not agreeing on everything, and that makes life so much more peaceful than when surrounded by cultish fundies who will hate you for any step you take outside of their rules. For people here, rejecting one of your ideas is not the same thing as rejecting you as a person, and that makes us a hell of a lot more moral and compassionate than a lot of christians out there.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

BAA,

You don't ever have to apologize for anything, at least to me, because you possess the ONE thing that xtians like that moron you described do not have - honesty. Their blind, mindless mantras as what you described coming from that insensitive clown's mouth are so typical of their ilk. They have NOTHING to offer anyone especially hope so they regurgitate what they've been taught without ever really thinking about what it is they've actually been taught in the first place!

 

All he had to do was put an arm around you and say "I don't know what to say to you during this time but I'm here for you no matter what". That would have done wonders for you instead of what he pulled.

 

But if there's any comfort I can offer it is simply this - I for one don't know what to say during this rough time for you but like the others around here, I'm here for you. You did and said nothing to apologize for. Speaking honestly about things requires no defense.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Posted Yesterday, 07:55 PM

 

snapback.pngbornagainathiest, on 02 August 2012 - 12:35 PM, said:

 

Thank you for your measured response Ouroboros.

You mean like your 3 or 4 posts with oversize big blue letters? That's argument from SCREAMING. And it's a fallacy. A claim isn't made true because you're putting it on a billboard and screaming it from the rooftops.

 

 

Quote

 

I think I see where I stand now

Your response above says another thing.

 

 

Quote

 

But please take back the attention whore label. I resent that.

Ok. Sorry. You're not an attention whore. But huge billboards serve the purpose to call for attention. If you didn't want it, then don't make it so big. Don't shout from the rooftop and then complain people reacted

 

I would like to sincerely apologize to everyone affected by my inexcusable behavior in the Theological Discussions section, specifically, the thread entitled, "Killing in the Name of Atheism".

 

I was totally out of line and regret my actions and I would like to withdraw everything that I wrote that is unreasonable, offensive and in blatant contravention of the letter and the spirit of this forum's guidelines.

I have no problem you calling anyone a troll. But do so in the sections where we allow it.

 

And understand this, I might be upset with your behavior, but it doesn't mean I don't like you or appreciate everything else you contribute on this website. You have good points and good stuff... when you debate, discuss, and argue your points.

 

As mentioned above, what I did was inexcusable.

However, I would like to offer an explanation for this episode and ask everyone to understand that I am currently experiencing extreme emotional upset and anger management issues.

I get it. I've been there. Occasionally I get there still. In most cases, but not always, I write a post... but won't submit it... think a little... wait a little... then 10 minutes later I rewrite it and make it a bit nicer. I don't always succeed either.

 

So again, do understand that this does not in any way reflect on my appreciation of you on the forum.

 

I was already pissed off with End3's previous replies and all the anger and hurt of my meeting with E was directed at him and later at Ouroboros and Antlerman. That was why I was 'screaming' in huge, multicolored letters.

And you do understand that Antlerman and I was trying to have a peaceful conversation with End... until we got a series of big blue letter billboards telling us, or rather commanding us, to treat him as a troll... eh... not cool. So perhaps we should ban him for upsetting you. And then we can move on and ban everyone who has at any point upset anyone else on this board... it will be lonely because no one will be left. End behaves like a troll sometimes, and I do too. We all do. Even your billboard was trollish in my book. You were trolling for reaction and people to respond to your "request". It turns up the heat. It's a way of escalating issues. It's calling for attention. That's what trolls sometimes do.

 

This explains why I wrote what I did, but it does not excuse it. It only puts it into the proper context, so that, perhaps, others may better understand it.

It does. I've been there plenty of times. You got the point, and that's what matters.

 

But do understand that big colorful billboards have one and one only purpose... to call attention. That's why they use them along the freeways...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Super Moderator

I'm so sorry you had to go through all that shit from a so-called friend. Even if god existed, no one knows what happens when someone stands at those pearly gates. [ I almost gagged typing "pearly gates"... but you get my drift closedeyes.gif ! ]

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Moderator

I've definitely had my moments under duress as well. Sorry about your mom and the insensitivity of your friend. Hope you are able to get your hand and your car fixed up.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Goddamn, I would have fucking killed him.

Ditto. With people like that all I wanna do is scream out 'can you just shut the f**k up?'
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Goddamn, I would have fucking killed him.

 

I don't know if I would've killed him outright, but I would've almost certainly smashed him across the face and chased him around the room, throwing all available throwable objects at him while screaming something like "You bastard! How fucking dare you smear your pigshit mythology over the memories of someone I loved."

 

I don't wish hellfire upon "E," but I do wish upon him the most egregiously brutal and unrelenting wake-up call that the real world has to offer.

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ok, I wouldn't kill him. But I would find a way to tie him down and rub my ass n balls all over his arrogant little fuck face.

 

And I'd fart. I'd definitely rip ass all over that shit.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Count me in among those who would have planned to use at least serious violence against that morontheist fuckface. :vent:

 

Now I can't remember having seen those "billboard postings"; I can say with confidence they didn't bother me (if just for that very reason), so BA, no offense taken on my side in any case ;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

*hugs*

 

Christianity is full of black and white emotional thinking. Calm, reasonable adult discussions are full of grey areas. It took me a long time to figure out how to be able to think in shades of grey without panic, anger, guilt, or fear. I used to feel unsure of myself and afraid every time I heard an emotional pastor on the radio, because, you know, he really really feels strongly about it. How could anyone with that powerful of an emotion be so wrong?

 

It sounds to me like you're surrounded by assholes who can't tell the difference between emotions and logic (which means that not only do they use emotions when they think they're using logic, but they can't parse human emotions well enough to know how not to be a jerk). I'm not sure exactly how to express what I'm trying to say here, but here goes: I hope you get some time away from such people, and maybe even some time with sane people, so that you can see how much nicer life is with people who understand the difference. I hope you feel safe enough on this forum that you discover that it's ok to have disagreements with other people without needing to feel defensive about it; no one here will think you're going to hell for not agreeing on everything, and that makes life so much more peaceful than when surrounded by cultish fundies who will hate you for any step you take outside of their rules. For people here, rejecting one of your ideas is not the same thing as rejecting you as a person, and that makes us a hell of a lot more moral and compassionate than a lot of christians out there.

 

I know exactly what you're talking about. Christians think they're being "logical" and "rational" when they are really appealing to people's emotions. That's why pascal's wager fails so badly.

 

As for that asshole who said that about your mother... Let's just say he better watch who he says that to.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

 

E didn't listen. The man whom I'd once respected as a fellow brother in Christ not only told me that my mom would be joining my dad and my brother in Hell, but he also added that my fate was to be there with them.

 

 

Sorry he got you riled up. Maybe next time you see him and he starts talking about Jeebus start laughing in his face. "You STILL believe in Santa too, E?" Walk off with a big grin on your face as if he is retarded.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Goddamn, I would have fucking killed him.

 

I don't know if I would've killed him outright, but I would've almost certainly smashed him across the face and chased him around the room, throwing all available throwable objects at him while screaming something like "You bastard! How fucking dare you smear your pigshit mythology over the memories of someone I loved."

 

I don't wish hellfire upon "E," but I do wish upon him the most egregiously brutal and unrelenting wake-up call that the real world has to offer.

 

Wake up calls do occur and they are fun to watch. And in the midst of his crisis give him a call and say, "You didn't pray hard enough" or "God knows best" or other inappropriate crap.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Goddamn, I would have fucking killed him.

 

"E, I will put you on the prayer chain for that broken nose..."

 

"What broken nose?"

 

"This one!" Blam! :-)

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

Ok. Sorry. You're not an attention whore. But huge billboards serve the purpose to call for attention. If you didn't want it, then don't make it so big. Don't shout from the rooftop and then complain people reacted

 

 

Mustang Ranch billboard

 

Attention: Whores!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

BAA,

 

We all have our days. And I think you did well, considering what that "person" said to you, not to lose it in an even bigger way. You still have more control over yourself than I do. Thinking of you.

 

Lots of love and hugs,

 

Pudd

Link to comment
Share on other sites

To all of you good people...

 

...please receive my thanks, hugs and deep appreciation for your replies. They mean a lot to me. smile.png

 

Truth be told, I'm not in a 'good' place right now, but all of your kind words are a great help and I reckon that whenever I log in here I'll make it my business to go to this thread first and re-read your messages before going to any other section and letting what I see there upset me.

 

Many of you folks have said that you've either had experiences like that or can easily relate to what I reported. That being so, I feel I can unburden myself a bit because you'll know where I'm coming from and can readily empathize with my current state of mind.

 

Have you ever felt like grabbing one these "ever-so-challenging" Christian by the lapels and shaking them, while yelling at them to stop pretending and stop deluding themselves?

 

Or have you ever transferred the anger you've felt towards the Christians you meet day by day onto the Christians in this forum - as I did with End3? (Sorry End. sad.png )

 

Perhaps you can appreciate that I irrationalized what I wrote, kidding myself that it all served some kind of 'greater' purpose? Revenge was disguising itself as justice and the hurt was the fuel that made me justify myself in my own eyes? (Sorry Ouroboros. sad.png )

 

Yes, intellectually I know that these things are wrong and harmful and counter-productive - but right now my emotions are at war with my logic, which (now that I look at what I've just typed) makes me sound like Mr. Spock!

 

Anyway, I think I'll finish up now with a couple of person-to person messages.

 

To Ouroboros...

 

I hear you and see the sense of your words. Thanks again.

 

To Blackpudd1n...

 

Ummm... I did promise to message you, didn't I?

Uh... something else got in the way of that - as you've seen.

When my head's a little more together you'll hear from me, ok?

smile.png

 

Now I must go.

 

Goodbye, my friends.

 

LeslieWave.gif

 

 

BAA.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

To Blackpudd1n...

 

Ummm... I did promise to message you, didn't I?

Uh... something else got in the way of that - as you've seen.

When my head's a little more together you'll hear from me, ok?

smile.png

 

Take all the time you need, BAA :) Messaging me is the least of your concerns right now :) Just wanted you to know that I care, that's all :) I understand only too well how it feels and what it's like to feel so scattered. Dad calls it the "snow globe effect"- everything's all shaken up and hasn't quite settled back down again inside your head.

 

Be kind to yourself. Hugs,

 

Pudd :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
 Share

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Guidelines.