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Goodbye Jesus

Pickup Lines For Christians


Wings

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Saw this and wanted to share... it made me <lol> that there is a trending #ChristianPickUpLines.

Got any good ones to make us all smile? smile.png

 

94575660895442258_XRx6xqZM_f.jpg

 

ps. I'm not meaning to make fun of Christians, I just find these lines hilarious and my secular friends won't get them and my Christian friends will be offended!

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Goodbye Jesus

"You are perfect, except with all the sin."

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"I've been praying for a heavenly vision. And now my prayer has been answered!"

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oh, I didn't realize there was a humour forum... cool beans. If I see anymore, I'll add them there :)

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"An angel must of fell from heaven because im looking at one."happydance.gif

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Pick a line from the Song of Songs.

 

"Want to pray together?"

"What's your favorite verse?"

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"God has chosen you to submit yourself to me."

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"I've already committed adultery with my heart looking at you. Lets take it further."

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Your hair is like a flock of goats descending from Beer-Sheeba.

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I wanna love you like David loved Jonathan. **wink wink nudge nudge**

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"You put the 'cute' back in persecution...''

 

"Welcome to the christian family... the only family where brothers and sisters can marry each other."

 

"I would bring your father twelve-hundred Philistine foreskins for just one date with you."

 

"Are you a homosexual? Because it’s burning up in here."

 

"What's your name and number so I can add you to my "prayer" list?"

 

"I was reading the book of Numbers and I noticed I didn't have yours."

 

"Hey girl. I'd love to show you 50 shades of grace..."

 

"You are like manna from heaven: Fresh everyday."

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"Did it hurt?"

"Did what hurt?"

"When you fell from heaven."

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For ladies who really want to be to the point...

 

"I'm like jesus, I want to get nailed."

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I think I just found my missing rib.

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C'mon baby, make like Jesus and gimme some dat healing touch.

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Let's have communion and consume each other.

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Your hair is like a flock of goats descending from Beer-Sheeba.

And your teeth are like a flock of sheep.

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I would cause thee to drink of spiced wine of the juice of my pomegranate.

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You must be related to Elisha baby, 'cause damn! you're just so fly!

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It is well for one to remain single,but you'll do.

UPD

Read that one on twitter:

"So last night i was reading through the book of Numbers and i realised, i don't have yours"

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And your teeth are like a flock of sheep.

 

If you want to insult her you could say "your teeth are like stars, yellow and far away from each other."

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The one who loves another has fulfilled the law, so let's fulfill the law together.

 

I want to live in you the way Jesus lives in me.

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I already paid your father 50 shekels of silver.

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