Overcame Faith Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 Some people on ExC deserve special recognition. Margee is on the top of my list of such people. Thank-you Margee for your contributions to ExC!! You have encouraged more people, including me, than you can possibly know!! You are such a wonderful example of one who reaches out to others and encourages them. You have encouraged me in my times of trouble more times than you can possibly know and I appreciate it so much. You deserve the title of ExC member of the year 2014 and I nominate you for that title. You are special. Thank you for being exactly who you are!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator florduh Posted January 11, 2015 Super Moderator Share Posted January 11, 2015 I think we have a rule against any "Member of the Year" being Canadian. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
♦ Fuego ♦ Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 Will the poobah hat fit? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator TrueFreedom Posted January 11, 2015 Moderator Share Posted January 11, 2015 Yay, Margee!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RipVanWinkle Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 I triple the praise for Margie. She is the best. Rip 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TotalWreck Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 I completely agree! Margee is one of the kindest people I have ever met. No matter how busy her own life gets, she always manages to find the time to give encouragement and advice to others (myself included!). The world would be a better place if there were more Margee's, and I mean that! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FreeThinkerNZ Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thurisaz Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 Nothing to add here that's not already been said, so just: 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R. S. Martin Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 I think we have a rule against any "Member of the Year" being Canadian. That's discrimination! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duderonomy Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 I think Margee is the kindest and most thoughtful person here. No offence to anyone else of course, but she just is. I only wish I could be as smart and thoughtful as she is. Rules, schmules! She's got my vote for Ex-C member of the Year 2014! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
♦ nivek ♦ Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 Y'all DO remember the last few POY here were?You DON'T?BBQ was DELICIOUS! kL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator buffettphan Posted January 11, 2015 Super Moderator Share Posted January 11, 2015 Ex-C sure wouldn't be the same without sweet, kind, compassionate Margee! So glad you're here! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 Easily, Margee has encouraged me more than any other member of ex-C. And I have seen her encouraging so many others that I quickly lost count. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BendyLine Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 Love you, Margee. You are a treasure. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellinas Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 Margee - I am going to join this shameless attempt to embarrass you and proclaim your virtues also! A kind heart deserves (and wins) many plaudits! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geezer Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 I agree. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilith666 Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 Hooray for Margee! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Furball Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 Your as sweet as frosting 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
decafaholic Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 I triple the praise for Margie. She is the best. Rip Your reply scared me to fucking death! The "Rip" at the end...I haven't been on the forums in over a year and I thought she had died! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R. S. Martin Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 That's just Rip's way of signing off, as I'm sure you figured out in the end. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woodsy Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 Margee has helped me through the most difficult period of my life and she did it with great knowledge and compassion. I couldn't have made it without you, Sweetie! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Margee Posted January 12, 2015 Moderator Share Posted January 12, 2015 Overcame Faith...you have totally embarrassed me you brat!! O.F. knows that I am 'numbed-out' right now and I know he did this to encourage me. Thank you again my friend. I feel beyond honored by all of you. You guys got me in tears again on this board with your compliments. I never dreamed that I would be honored like this when I first joined Ex-c. I joined one December night just before Christmas and I was in so much pain and confusion. I am going through an extremely difficult time right now dealing with the death of my stepfather over christmas and some other issues that I am working on in my life that I can't write publicly about. A professional is helping me see many things. So right now, I want to thank to take the opportunity to thank every single member on Ex-c for being there and helping me in the difficult journey of deconverting in the last 4 years.. I have said it a million times - I couldn't have done it without any of you guys. From the paragraphs and paragraphs of writing you guys did to answer my questions with the most wonderful advise.......... to the 'perfect' one liners that florduh has helped me with so much. I used to tell florduh how it amazed me how he could sum something up so wonderful with one or two sentences. I always have to write a book about the way I feel!! Here comes one today because I want to tell you a little about where I'm at in this journey right now. (for those who are interested) Lol I was one of those people that was devastated to find out that the Christian god did not exist. To let chritianity go was like trying to clear out a virus of my mind in the last 4 years because religion is a virus to me. I was infected. I almost died from this virus. I have read over and over that I was not the only one... it had affected all you wonderful people on EX-c. I have found that this religious abuse and virus affects the minds' ability to heal, because of all the emotions that one feels when you are terrified (and have been brainwashed) of the fires of hell. It's been a hard journey for me because I was so brainwashed by the Pentecostal religion. I had to somehow grow 'thicker skin' for the new knowledge that I would discover on Ex-c. I would have preferred to stay in the 'cave' and hide many times, but I knew for me....that I had to find out the truth no matter how hard it was going to be. I had to come out of isolation and face the cold, hard facts of life like there might not be a heaven that I believed in my whole life. That was so hard because that's where I believed all my loved ones and dogs and cats were... and I would see them all again one day. I think you all know (especially the members who have been here for 4 years) that I am a highly, sensitive person and have tried to be a peace-keeper all my life to the point that it wore me completely out. I was one of those who tried to love unconditionally because that's what god told me to do. I always hated fighting so I was a perfect target to allow people to walk over me. I grew up in a very fighting home. I was always very sensitive. I can hardly kill a bug without crying. I've had to stop watching any violence on TV or reading newspapers altogether because I simply cannot handle the stories of men throwing their beautiful baby girls over a bridge. These stories affect most people of course, but highly sensitive personalities like mine takes it on like a sponge. I vision it for days and sometimes weeks of what it must have felt like for that little girl. It's a horrible personality to get stuck with. It's a very difficult personality to have because I take things so 'to heart'. Please trust me that I am not bragging at all about my personality.....this type of personality fights depression everyday because of the evils in the world. That's why I understand depression so well. And I have to fight it everyday. And my heart goes out to any of you who struggle with it. The biggest lie I had to face was the lie of Christianity and it nearly devastated me completely. As many questions as I had toward the bible, I still believed in jesus very much and did not want to face the fact that it might not be true. I finally think that I somehow have 'closure' on christianity now. Besides the odd fear of hell, I'm sure Christianity is a myth. Took 4 years of studying with you guys on Ex-c to help me feel at peace. I want to thank each and everyone of you for taking the time to respond to my hundred's of posts in the last years. I feel like the Phoenix who has 'rose from the ashes'. In many ways, I am not the same person who joined this board 4 years ago. Because I got 'freed up' from Christianity (and fear) to form my own opinions, I have changed my mind about many things. When I came on this board I had one worldview and that was it. And it was a christian worldview even though I was still a doubter during the last couple of years before I admitted to myself that I was doubting the whole thing. Trying to please the Christian god was my whole purpose even though I failed a million times. My journey on this board was to unravel some puzzles and find another way I might believe in life without the christian god. I had to somehow break down those old values, my beliefs, attitudes, my pre-conditioning from others as well as my childhood conditioning. All of my 'programming' had to go, in order to be able to deal with the new personality that I knew was slowly emerging from the 'deconverting' of religion. I could feel myself changing and it was mighty scary. I was in a brand new relationship with me and it caused me so much cognitive dissonance that for awhile, I didn't know who I was. I had to look at all of my other relationships...friends and family, including my close relationships with others... and how I 'partner' up with them and allow certain things which do not 'grow' two people together for a truly intimate relationship. Because I don't like to fight, I couldn't speak up for myself. I held a lot of stuff inside me which made me full of resentment, and then allowed issues to slide. Because of this, I suffered relationship breakdowns and failures in my past. I have made up my mind and refuse to do this any longer in the future. I have to take the 'tape' off my mouth and tell my loved ones how I really feel and I've learned that this won't always make them happy. I had to study my behavioral patterns and what worked for me and what didn't. The more I studied on Ex-c and elsewhere, the more I was breaking down old patterns of brainwashing. I was actually forming my very own opinions without anyone telling me how I should believe or act. I had to challenge my thinking...negative and positive to see what was serving me and my 'higher good' (if you don't mind me using that phrase) I had to see the darkness of the world without a god running it and accept that flawed humans run this world and that's why it's flawed. Because we are imperfect people with a 'light' side and a 'dark' side. I had to see my own dark and light side. Everything was teaching me to think a brand new way....I became more logical...even more analytical than I have ever been in my life because I had already asked way too many questions about life (and got in trouble for that and was always told to stop) but my questioning flourished beyond the normal person. Lots of people could care less who runs this world or how the worldly systems work. I don't think I was ever a 'follower', now that I look back. I always had a rebelling streak in me. The 'sheep' followers always made fun of me because I was much too inquisitive. I wanted the hard answers no matter how much they hurt. They didn't want to know and always told me to relax but I couldn't. I tried to be a follower when I belonged to the church. I really tried my best to follow jesus and yet....... I still bucked it back then with too many questions, so I know now that I was a logical thinker even 40 years ago. I played along with Christianity because it seemed the whole world believed it, so why shouldn't I? How dare I question any of this about the bible god? I wanted god to be true for a very long time, even with the inquisitive mind I had. There was no pastor who could answer those hard questions I asked. I was told by all pastors to have faith. I tried so hard to have faith in the unseen and it wasn't working for me. All of this searching in the past few years on Ex-c and trying to study evolution was breaking down the structures of my old mind. I looked at every pattern from my logical and emotional personality. I even had to see what I felt 'indifferent' about. I found out that I could be less emotional and learn how to take command of my own emotional mind when that state engulfed me. I leaned that it was OK to be cold/aloof in certain situations. I've learned that it's OK to say 'no'. I am a much more 'aware' person now of everything. This helps me to not overreact with certain things anymore. It has helped me to be a bit more calm. I used to constantly freak out because god did not seem to answer many of my prayers and I used to get soooo mad at him. I was always stomping my feet at him like a spoiled child, telling him he was too slow. I had to take a look at how too giving can be about not looking after myself first. I was told by my parents that I be real nice to everyone including people who weren't good for me. I was told to put myself in others' shoes all the time (and I did and still do) and do the right thing for them even if they were lazy and wouldn't work and needed money..I was to be the giver or I wasn't good. I was a prime target for the church. The church promised me that these people god inserted in my life was so I could help them. And I tried to do it. This was also the old programming from my childhood. So I had to work my way through the structures and programming that were taught to me by my parents, teaches, ministers, etc. I had to break this whole personality all down to build it back up to what my brain said/ made sense to me/ what sat right in my heart. This was my quest. To be free from the shackles and bondage of what the world insisted I be. I had to make peace with all of it and not blame anyone with mapping my mind for me.. It wasn't anybodies fault really. They all did what they did and their parents did and their teachers did and how institutions taught us to behave and believe. I learned that we are all programmed from birth. Then i had to let go of all blame. I had to get closure. I needed to heal all the connections to those things and not be angry anymore. I took on far too much responsibility thinking that was the right thing to do in order to be a good person. I also think in a way that being the rebeller that I am, people were frightened by things I said and yet were envious at the same time. I think a lot of them they felt the same way I did, but weren't ready for the 'showdown' that comes with coming out of the closet with everything... including that you don't think like everyone else. I think many people wanted to have the guts to become authentic, but were afraid of the repercussions. I'm not anymore. I had to learn a brand new strength within myself and it was not easy. By standing up for who you are and being authentic, you must face the fact that many will abandon you and that was always my greatest fear...abandonment. Abandonment would always leave me feeling not good enough/not worthy enough. But I know I am now...at least for a certain few people in my life. These will be the friends that stick with me no matter what because we allow each other to be open-minded and non judgmental. If the others leave...so be it. If they don't like me anymore...so be it. It hurts like hell to say this but I need to grow thicker skin and be realistic. I do not state any of the above with arrogance. I would still prefer that a big god was running the whole show. These are my discoveries during my four years here on Ex-c. Your journey is your journey and I want to be here for you if you need my help. I truly feel re born. And it's because of you guys. You guys are the ones that helped me. You all deserve to be honored today...... each and every one of you. We'll all wear the hat together!! We're all heroes on this site. I love you guys. I got a crush on all of you!! Thank you so much for this today. Love and hugs to all of you today Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedStar Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 You're awesome Margee, and I hope of feel better soon, death can be a really tough thing to deal with, sometimes you just have to take things one day at a time, try not to have too much on your plate at once. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Positivist Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 We love you Margee!!! Thank you for your words of encouragement, in our darkest hours!!! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leo Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 Margee, that post took a lot of courage to write. It really resonates with people in different ways. I admire your transparency ... and it's great you took that first step on that Christmas Eve -- had to be a tough time of year to do that -- and then have continued on this site. I'm with everyone else on here: Cheers to you. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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