Amethyst Posted February 26, 2006 Share Posted February 26, 2006 The main reason I don't like witnessing is because it shows absolutely no respect for who the other person is. And I agree that it's scary. This cult has taken over the world (at least, most of it), and everyone is expected to believe in it or at least be politically correct to those who do, and those who aren't are treated like crap for their beliefs. I don't mind cool Christians who don't feel the need to constantly witness. I really don't. But those who do are just not showing any respect for other people. They're arrogant. I couldn't agree with you more, Amethyst! I went to a funeral today at a christian church. I didn't know the guy very well, but his wife and family were super torn up. The entire program was hymns and scripture verses about how great god was. I think I heard the word, "Mercy" sixty times. The service felt so cold to me. I wanted to hear stories about who the guy was and what he meant to everyone he left behind. I hope his wife felt comforted by the cold service. Religon takes the humaness out of humanity. So, maybe there is a god; the wife will sleep alone tonight and everyother night without him. How is a scripture verse suppose to help her? I'm being very subjective here, I know. Perhaps if I were back there in that frame of thinking, I'd have found the service comforting. When my mother died when I was in high school, that was one thing that struck me about the funeral. It was not the least bit comforting. Everyone kept offering platitudes like "she's in heaven now" and "it's god's will" etc. Those stupid sayings don't help one bit! Especially when I was a teenager at the time, and nobody seemed to give a crap about how I was dealing with it. It was like they were trying to make themselves feel better about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taphophilia Posted February 26, 2006 Share Posted February 26, 2006 Seabiscuit, because of the bad manners of some of our Christian members, like Jacob's Ladder, expressed by posting sermons in the Ex-Christian Life forum (where a post of this nature is clearly unwelcome), we have seen fit to change the board permissions so that Christians of this ilk will no longer be allowed to post in that forum. We already had this rule applied to the Testimony forum. We were happy to delete this particular preaching post by Jacob's Ladder, which exceeded 10,000 words. Now I have a question: Are Christians born so obnoxious, oblivious and obtuse or does Christianity make them that way? I think Christianity gives them permission to be that way. It tells them they are right and everyone else who disagrees with them or has a differing opinion is wrong, case closed. It gives them permission to be bad mannered and to ignore others boundries but expects everyone to adhere to their boundries. Objecting to or questioning them is considered by them a severe breach of manners. It's like if someone came to my house and wiped their muddy shoes on my furniture and I objected to it. They would tell I was wrong because they had every right to do as they pleased since that's how they do it in their own house and everyone else they know does it the same way. No matter how much I explained how wrong it was, they would not accept what I had to say because they don't have any respect for me. Taph Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seabiscuit Posted February 26, 2006 Author Share Posted February 26, 2006 Reach, the answer is both. Because religon is a social construction parading around like nature itself, those who follow the bible god (a social construct parading around like nature) make up the rules and demand that we all follow because its nature or the way things should be. We, maybe I should just include me, are freaks of that nature. Keep in mind the blurred lines between nature and what humans created themselves. Now that I've been determined to be a freak, my personal boundaries are meaningless. My freakishness is determental to my own enternal survival. My personal boundaries must be destroyed in order to save my soul. The very wonderful part of all that, Reach, is realizing I'm not freakish at all! That's what's so exciting! Oh, at the funeral I spoke of a few posts up? I got so overwhelmed with all the crosses, death, talk of christ's bloodshed, robes, etc., I took out my little Female Budda and held it tight. Not because Budda meant much to me but because the little thing reminded me of a new mindset I'm beginning to find a foundation in. Somehow the little statue gave me comfort and warmth as the christian symbols pulled the life out of me. It wasn't the statue that gave me comfort. The symbol stands for all the new concepts I'm learning. The excitement I feel when I'm here on the board--learning. The good news is not only that I'm *not* freakish, but I'm finding new language and symbols to go with my new path. Hey, Reach? I said all that in less then 10,000 words. Go figure! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amethyst Posted February 26, 2006 Share Posted February 26, 2006 I think Christianity gives them permission to be that way. It tells them they are right and everyone else who disagrees with them or has a differing opinion is wrong, case closed. It gives them permission to be bad mannered and to ignore others boundries but expects everyone to adhere to their boundries. Objecting to or questioning them is considered by them a severe breach of manners. It's like if someone came to my house and wiped their muddy shoes on my furniture and I objected to it. They would tell I was wrong because they had every right to do as they pleased since that's how they do it in their own house and everyone else they know does it the same way. No matter how much I explained how wrong it was, they would not accept what I had to say because they don't have any respect for me. Taph Yeah. At least, in my experience. The fundies I grew up around always expected everyone else to be Exactly Like Them . If you weren't, you were treated badly or ignored. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
knowmad Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 Seabiscuit, I empathise with your desire for a life free from xian preaching. This of course is impossible, but that should not deter you from creating this world for yourself. This entails a two pronged effort on your part. 1: Remove the external aggrevation of xian preaching. This will not happen overnight but a constant supply of statements directed to these preachers will eventually reduce the amount of preaching directed at you- statements or questions like these Fuck off, irrelevant, boring or my fav" that's the most boringest thing I have ever heard", you're not even a real xian, the cheque's in the mail, does my bum look big in this?, repeatedly answer with "pardon I missed that?, etc etc. The reason why the reduction of preaching directed at you will take a while is because each preacher is unique and has a unique motive for preaching and has a unique limit meter for knowing when to shut the fuck up "shake the dust from their feet and move onto someone who wants to listen". Sadly, what you are experiencing is an intergral part of deconverting and it is something you will have to deal with personally as we can't have that idealistic world of never being preached at, but it's a great goal to work towards. 2: Reprogram your mind (thoughts, reactions etc) so that preaching doesn't affect you. The trick is to not shut it out of your mind but to nullify the negative effect these words have on you. A built in filter of sorts. I have one of these in regards to music. I work in the housing construction industry, fucked up that it is and there's nothing more infuriating for me that to be working on a house completely alone enjoying the peaceful quiet surrounding and along comes a bunch of brickies who can't work without having their radio on so the whole fucking neighbourhood can hear it. And it's that horrible mainstream/pop/classic rock crap that I detest so much. Ad to that it's 50% mind numbing ads and the morning programs are usually hosted by some form of "morning crew". You know the ones that try to be funny to try to jumpstart your day blah blah blah and they just talk and talk and fucking talk and it's not even funny. Well in this environment they have every right to play whatever shit they feel they need to make it through the day so I figured it's up to me to change my thinking so it doesn't annoy me anymore. I've gotten to the stage where it's filtered so much I don't even notice it and I am able to continue my cerebral ponderings in peace. As for having to put up with preaching in a forum environment, just scroll past it or savagely confront it whatever works for you. It's all apart of the experience of deconverting to which you have to adapt to in your own way. I wish you well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jrmarlin Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 The only funeral I have ever gone to where I could not only appreciate what was going on but also felt the person who died was actually remembered was a Greek funeral. The Greeks believe that death is a celebration time -- not one of sadness. They party down -- all the while speaking about the departed. They share memories, talk about the person's idiosyncrasies and their eccentric ways of being while they were alive. But the whole funeral is based on the love of that person and sending them off with a bang. Most Xians I know that have been to a real Greek funeral (which are few I can assure you) are completely horrified because they are not used to people being given a loving and memorable send off to the great beyond. I personally think its great! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lizard Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 When my mother died when I was in high school, that was one thing that struck me about the funeral. It was not the least bit comforting. Everyone kept offering platitudes like "she's in heaven now" and "it's god's will" etc. Those stupid sayings don't help one bit! Especially when I was a teenager at the time, and nobody seemed to give a crap about how I was dealing with it. It was like they were trying to make themselves feel better about it. They were trying to make themselves feel better. For many, a funeral brings home mortality. We all will die. I have found that alot of xtians really can't deal with death. Seeing someone dead, they think "there but for the grace of gawd go I".. The last funeral I went to was for a neighbor man. He collapsed with a heart attack while mowing his yard..and died a few days later. It was a methodist service at the cemetary (kinda weird..the church itself was only a few blocks away) Now, Ken was not a churchgoing man. I'm sure he was methodist in name only. The service was kinda blah..song playing in the background was "How Great Thou Art"..purported to be his favorite song..uhm yeah, right..(more likely some country song about drinking and losing your woman) What I found amusing though, and my husband found "disrespectful", was that one of his children tucked a Marlboro into his pocket before they closed the casket. He was a chain smoker, which probably led to his final heart attack. Most fitting, really... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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