Research Rant

[Onyx]

Sorry but I didn't post my testimony.

A long time ago, I posted one but it was lost and I didn't want to do it again.

Sorry.

 

But since you asked me a question, leaving Christianity was pretty easy, the only barrier being my dad.

He threated to throw me out if I stayed an atheist.

So I pretended to be a Christian. To this day, he still doesn't know.

 

Recently, I officially and completely came out as an atheist at school.

Everybody was shocked but knowing me, they wasn't surprised.

There was some preaching to but I walked away.

 

Right now, I'm accepted into Funtime, NZ's longest running comic book anthology series, (I'm an amateur cartoonist, officially) people've been giving me offers about wheelchair racing sports and my friend's coming over.

 

[Dra_Mucd_Uha]

Sorry but I didn't post my testimony.

A long time ago, I posted one but it was lost and I didn't want to do it again.

Sorry.

 

But since you asked me a question, leaving Christianity was pretty easy, the only barrier being my dad.

He threated to throw me out if I stayed an atheist.

So I pretended to be a Christian. To this day, he still doesn't know.

 

Recently, I officially and completely came out as an atheist at school.

Everybody was shocked but knowing me, they wasn't surprised.

There was some preaching to but I walked away.

 

Right now, I'm accepted into Funtime, NZ's longest running comic book anthology series, (I'm an amateur cartoonist, officially) people've been giving me offers about wheelchair racing sports and my friend's coming over.

 

Nice. Unfortunately (obviously), I'm not that fortunate. My fault though. I can't get away from it all so easily. I burried myself in Christianity as a believer, from leading a Christian website, leading in the Youth group, and leading Christian activities at school. I'm known as the "religious kid" to this day. I also set the pace in my household as far as Christianity goes. My family, including parents, usually come to me when they have troubles/questions. Heh... my position makes things difficult...

 

The plus side, however, is my father. I'm sorry to hear yours is like that. Of course I can't say mine isn't, because I haven't told him. My stepfather would throw me out though. He'd probably cuss me out for not being Christian (go figure). My dad is a very open person. Or at least I've always seen him as such. He also grew up in a Christian home, thanks to my grandparents. So I don't blame him for his belief today. I kind of expected him to have left by now though, being as open-minded as he seems. I've considered telling him about my disbelief. I think I should. I don't know. I'm honestly afraid of his reaction. But I don't want to lie to him either.

 

I've only told 3 people at school I'm Atheist: My girlfriend (who's Christian, but we're still together), my best friend (who turned Atheist with me ), another friend (who I expect to ditch me sometime soon for not accepting the Guy in the Sky's "love"), and another girl that asked me out, who is Christian, and I told her I was Atheist instead of explaining that I didn't want to go out with her (and that I already have a gf...). The reactions of the few people I've told have been really emotional. I'm actually very well at keeping my emotions at bay, but breaking this kind of news and seeing their reactions... it's enough to make a guy want to go back just to save the emotional pain. But I refuse to believe a lie.

 

I'm ranting again... sorry, when I get going, I find it difficult to stop. This is hard to get through.

[HadouKen24]

If you really want to understand Christianity, Dra, you need to go to the experts. Your average forum-goer has only a very basic understanding of it. There are few spots on the internet where you'll find any real sophistication in this regard. The only place I know of where you can regularly find really on-the-ball Christians is Theology Web. There are some very fair-minded people there. But I would recommend going and reading up on theology and church classics, like Augustine's Confessions. That is, if you want to understand Christianity.

 

I think I'm fortunate in that I knew exactly where to turn for consolation on the way out of Christianity. It was a bit of an existential struggle to leave Christianity, but it was easier for me to begin developing my own view of things than it has been for others. The study of Western philosophy has given me a really useful mental toolbox to help me think my way through things. For those who have the inclination, it can help bring a lot of clarity to certain issues; it may not lead to a final answer, but it at least can help show you what the right questions are.

 

It may be unwise to simply go straight to atheism. There are far more possibilities than just Christianity and atheism. There are far too many ideas about what kind of God might or might not exist to go straight to the conclusion that all these ideas are false. Particularly interesting, I think, are various forms of pantheism. Spinoza's version is quite compelling.

[Onyx]

People see me as a gonzo sort of person.

I'm brash, loud and a bit crazy.

Oh and I offend a lot of people by being myself.

 

But I don't care anymore. If I was a cartoon TV show, it'd be that cartoon which never lets up, Southpark or Simpsons.

I've come close to detention but I often acted within bounds of the rules.

 

Chutzpah and the "give it a go" attitude is my trademark of best stories.

However cos of my double coming out about two different things is thinning my social chances with people, I may be like Matt and Trey of Southpark, but from what I've seen of people meeting me, I'm not as cool.

 

I'll show them that I'll be the ULTIMATE! I'm already cool but you ain't seen nothing yet!

[Ouroboros]

...a 16-year old guy who has only been an Atheist for about a month?

...

At least you don't have to live a huge chunk of your life before becoming one and start asking the questions.

 

 

Most people in religion don't want to argue or discuss their faith, just of the simple reason they know they don't have enough knowledge, research, foundation or backing for their claims. I knew that when I was Christian. It all really was just based on that I believed, not that I could see with my eyes or that I could prove what I thought. It was only what I wanted to be true, and all the rest had to be adjusted to fit to it. That's the reason no one will ever be able to give you the answers you want in religion. They just don't have them. The best you can get are speculations, and they will be different from person to person.

 

I understand your frustration though. And to have been in the fold for 30 years, and not be able to answer my own questions, or actually the only answers lead away from religion, it proves how little one really knows when you really only believe.

[Dra_Mucd_Uha]

If you really want to understand Christianity, Dra, you need to go to the experts. Your average forum-goer has only a very basic understanding of it. There are few spots on the internet where you'll find any real sophistication in this regard. The only place I know of where you can regularly find really on-the-ball Christians is Theology Web. There are some very fair-minded people there. But I would recommend going and reading up on theology and church classics, like Augustine's Confessions. That is, if you want to understand Christianity.

 

I think I'm fortunate in that I knew exactly where to turn for consolation on the way out of Christianity. It was a bit of an existential struggle to leave Christianity, but it was easier for me to begin developing my own view of things than it has been for others. The study of Western philosophy has given me a really useful mental toolbox to help me think my way through things. For those who have the inclination, it can help bring a lot of clarity to certain issues; it may not lead to a final answer, but it at least can help show you what the right questions are.

 

It may be unwise to simply go straight to atheism. There are far more possibilities than just Christianity and atheism. There are far too many ideas about what kind of God might or might not exist to go straight to the conclusion that all these ideas are false. Particularly interesting, I think, are various forms of pantheism. Spinoza's version is quite compelling.

I would like a better understanding of Christianity. And other religions. Although to me it's always been either Christianity is true or not. I never even considered other religions, but should even if I don't want to. It's better to have a larger understanding of religion of you want to be confident in your disbelief, I think. Other religions have never been an option to me, unlike Christianity and, even though I didn't want to admit it, the opposite thereof. I wouldn't call it Atheisism, but simply an unbeliever. Atheists are not just non-believers in Christianity, but in all religions. At this point I'm confident in my disbelief in Christianity, although I still want to learn more. I will try to look into other religions as well.

 

People see me as a gonzo sort of person.

I'm brash, loud and a bit crazy.

Oh and I offend a lot of people by being myself.

 

But I don't care anymore. If I was a cartoon TV show, it'd be that cartoon which never lets up, Southpark or Simpsons.

I've come close to detention but I often acted within bounds of the rules.

 

Chutzpah and the "give it a go" attitude is my trademark of best stories.

However cos of my double coming out about two different things is thinning my social chances with people, I may be like Matt and Trey of Southpark, but from what I've seen of people meeting me, I'm not as cool.

 

I'll show them that I'll be the ULTIMATE! I'm already cool but you ain't seen nothing yet!

Lol, I don't think I could be classified as cool. Maybe. Some people think so. But it's alright. I guess being cool at school has never really been my thing. I can still have fun

 

At least you don't have to live a huge chunk of your life before becoming one and start asking the questions.

 

Most people in religion don't want to argue or discuss their faith, just of the simple reason they know they don't have enough knowledge, research, foundation or backing for their claims. I knew that when I was Christian. It all really was just based on that I believed, not that I could see with my eyes or that I could prove what I thought. It was only what I wanted to be true, and all the rest had to be adjusted to fit to it. That's the reason no one will ever be able to give you the answers you want in religion. They just don't have them. The best you can get are speculations, and they will be different from person to person.

 

I understand your frustration though. And to have been in the fold for 30 years, and not be able to answer my own questions, or actually the only answers lead away from religion, it proves how little one really knows when you really only believe.

I am very glad that I am where I am now instead of another 10 or even 20 years down the road, where I know I would probably have ended up being in ministry. Maybe even with a Christian family. The testimonies here are amazing. I don't see how some of the people here made it in the situations they were in, it couldn't have been easy.

 

This is what really sparks my aggravation. Maybe it's because I'm too much of a black-and-white person, but when you ask a question about Christianity and all these people give you all these different answers (speculations) which probably end up contradicting each other, I can't help but wonder why they even bother. Of course, I was there once, so I know there's a bunch of programming involved, but it seems no one can give a straight, common answer. The main consistent thing I've heard about Christianity is that God loves me. Outisde of that, the possibilities are endless.

[Guest Gongol]

Hey Dra man, Im not really new to these boards although this is my first post ive kinda been lurking around the boards since i deconverted a few months ago, woke up today feeling like crap but now ive had my coffee and listened to some 311 (in my opinion the happiest music ever haha) anyways just thought id throw my two cents in, when i was 16 i was soooo into christianity that i didnt do any school work and barely passed all my subjects, im convinced that had i used all that energy i put into christianity to my work at school maybe id have actually gotten somewhere much better in life than i am right now, so what im saying is focus on school with the ferver that would have been spent on christianity believe me you will thank yourself for it when your older. dont worry im not some old fart saying "do your schooling" just a 22 year old guy that wished he didnt have to start really learning about life three months ago haha, take it easy man.

[Taphophilia]

Hey Dra man, Im not really new to these boards although this is my first post ive kinda been lurking around the boards since i deconverted a few months ago, woke up today feeling like crap but now ive had my coffee and listened to some 311 (in my opinion the happiest music ever haha) anyways just thought id throw my two cents in, when i was 16 i was soooo into christianity that i didnt do any school work and barely passed all my subjects, im convinced that had i used all that energy i put into christianity to my work at school maybe id have actually gotten somewhere much better in life than i am right now, so what im saying is focus on school with the ferver that would have been spent on christianity believe me you will thank yourself for it when your older. dont worry im not some old fart saying "do your schooling" just a 22 year old guy that wished he didnt have to start really learning about life three months ago haha, take it easy man.

 

Hi Gongol,

 

Thanks for coming out of lurking and posting on the boards.

 

Taph