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Goodbye Jesus

Favorite Swearing?


garrisonjj

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With noooo doubt, fuck is the word :) (probably because I have not been able to use it in over 12 years!!!! lol)

 

Fucktard

Fucknut

Bastard

Son of a bitch

 

These are the ones that I most use.

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Now that I can say "the lord's name in vain" without fear of hell (what a moron I was), many versions of Jesus Christ come out of my mouth.

 

When it's not a bad situation, the South Park's Slave says it best - effeminate with a sharp 's' and a whine..."Jesuss Chrisst"

 

Then we have:

Christ in a bucket

Christ on a bicycle

just the simple, curt "Christ"

 

for non-blasphemous name calling:

asshat

fucknut

douchebag - reserved for the president most of the time

 

And my first go-to cuss word - a nice, firm FUCK. Heh - sounds kind of good right now.

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I like to make them up sometimes.....foofoo bumnuts!

 

fav's.....fuckwit, fuck off, fuck you, ducksnuts, arseholes and everything, cocksucker (because I watch "DEadwood' yesterday)

 

I say...Jeeeeesuscrist quite a lot......oh and bloody hell!

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I try to not swear at work, bad manners you know, so I took up the phrase "crackers". It has evolved into "crackerpackers" and the other day I said "krakatoa".

 

If I bump something and it hurts, I say "son of a bitch" and if my computer misbehaves, I have found myself saying "motherfucker". I often shorten that to "mo-fo" (moe-foe). I call misbehaving politicians and supervisors "bastards" which gets sometimes gets shortened to "b-tards". I also like the phrase that Scott Adams (Dilbert) came up with for stupid people - "in-duh-viduals". If you say this just right, people don't realize you're insulting them. :HaHa:

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Jesus ass-fucking Christ!

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Bitch

Darn

My lovely Jesus!

Lesbian!

Jesus!

Groanfuck!

Kik!

What?

Bloody festive!

Jesusrabbitry

Godgold!

Rabid Religionists!

Muthshit

 

 

Lots more.

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Guest JP1283

Anything with fuck in it.

 

Goddamn.

 

Jesus Christ.

 

Hell, shit, damn, etc.

 

But the word I can't stand the word..."cunt."

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Peter Cook and Dudley Moore's "Dereck and Clive" recordings:

 

Cook: "A Bloke come up to me the other day, an' he called me a cunt."

 

Moore: "An' what did you say to 'im?"

 

Cook: "Well, what could I say? I said: call me a cunt, you fuckin' cunt! An' then you know what he said?"

 

Moore: "What?"

 

Cook: "He said you callin' me a cunt, cunt? You're a fuckin', fuckin' cunt."

 

etc.

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Cunt

Twat

Muthfucker

Arsehole

Bollocks (As in: the Bible is a load of...)

Wanker(s) (As in: most Christians I know are..)

Shithole (As in: the town I live in is a total..)

Jesus H fuck! (expression of shock/surprise/dismay)

Fuckarama (as above)

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Shit

Fuck

Damn

Goddamnit

Fuckin A

Ass

Asshole

stupid ass

fuckwad

 

I still find it hard to swear using Jesus name. I repeat what others say when they say it, but it just doesn't come out of my mouth. I don't think I ever sweared using Jesus name before converting to xianity, and after 18 years a fundy it is just fucking ingrained.

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Fuckin A

 

 

I forgot about that one...and I use it all the time! lol

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Oh, I forgot - courtesy of Jay and Silent Bob: "Ain't that about a bitch?"

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Peter Cook and Dudley Moore's "Dereck and Clive" recordings:

 

Cook: "A Bloke come up to me the other day, an' he called me a cunt."

 

Moore: "An' what did you say to 'im?"

 

Cook: "Well, what could I say? I said: call me a cunt, you fuckin' cunt! An' then you know what he said?"

 

Moore: "What?"

 

Cook: "He said you callin' me a cunt, cunt? You're a fuckin', fuckin' cunt."

 

etc.

 

:lmao:

Didn't think anyone here would know that stuff!!!

Its was a classic...

 

also

 

"jump you fucker...jump'... :lmao:

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I got an email from a christian today about swearing, thought that I would share :)

 

" Is it just me or does there seem to be a lot more profanity

than there used to be? I know we are hearing more on television and in

the movies than in the past; but it seems that our workplaces,

classrooms and athletic fields are witnessing an increase in foul-mouth

folk. A recent Associated Press-Ipsos poll records that 74% of us

encounter people frequently using profanity in public. The poll also

showed that 46% of us Americans use profanity ourselves a few times a

week or more. That same poll showed that a third of us don't seem to be

bothered by it much.

 

Some time ago I came across a humorous yet thoughtful list

entitled: "Ten Reasons Why I Swear."

 

1. It pleases mother so much.

 

2. It is a fine mark of manliness.

 

3. It proves I have self control.

 

4. It indicates how clearly my mind operates.

 

5. It makes my conversation so pleasing to everybody.

 

6. It leaves no doubt in anyone's mind as to my good breeding.

 

7. It impresses people that I have more than ordinary education.

 

8. It is an unmistakable sign of culture and refinement.

 

9. It makes me a very desirable personality among women and children

and in

respectable society.

 

10. It is my way of honoring God who said: "Thou shalt not take the

name of the Lord

thy God in vain."

 

What does God say about profanity? The third of the 10 commandments

tells us not to take the name of the Lord our God in vain. Jesus

instructed us to swear not at all, but we are to simply let our yes by

yes and our no be no. And the apostle Paul instructs us in Ephesians

4:29: "Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good

for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers." And

in Colossians 3:8 we are challenged: "But now you yourselves are to put

off all these: anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy language out of

your mouth."

 

We may not be able to control the stream of profanity that

is swirling around us, but we can do our best to control our own

tongues. Determine that the words that come out of your own mouth will

be encouraging to others and pleasing to God."

 

Know what I want to say????

 

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ahhh, that felt good :-) lol

 

PS, did I mention, FUCK?

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"Jesus Tapdancing Christ!"

"Fucking Hell!"

"Goddamn motherfucking shit!"

"Cunt!"

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A work colleague once said:

 

"If it wasn't for swear words, we'd be fucked."

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General all around irritation: SHIT

Anger at those who don't drive as I think they should drive: MOTHERFUCKING COCKSUCKER!!!

 

I have a habit of saying "goddamnit" a lot but am trying to break that. This is NOT because I feel bad saying it or think it is "using the name of god in vain"...I couldn't give a shit less about that. I don't want to say it because if I am saying god damn it...I'm asking an invisible skyman to do me a favor...same as the fuckwad dumbass fundies. I don't believe in god and therefore don't need to ask it to damn anything for me.

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I have a habit of saying "goddamnit" a lot but am trying to break that. This is NOT because I feel bad saying it or think it is "using the name of god in vain"...I couldn't give a shit less about that. I don't want to say it because if I am saying god damn it...I'm asking an invisible skyman to do me a favor...same as the fuckwad dumbass fundies. I don't believe in god and therefore don't need to ask it to damn anything for me.

 

I never thought of that....very good point!

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Guest singlecoil

It is not very creative but my favorites are still the trio of fuck off, fuck you, fuck me (we cannot all be cursing wordsmiths). I guess any fucking derivative of fuck is fucking okay with me.

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LOL. This thread is funny! :HaHa:

 

My favourites are "fuck", "shit", and "damn". I use "fuck" the most.

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  • 2 weeks later...

"Go fuck yourself with a hairbrush!"

 

:eek:

 

Been there, done that, long story....

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I use fuck a LOT, sprinkled into sentences, inserted into words. Abso-fucking-lutely is a favorite. Get the fuck outta here is good too. I also enjoy "Jesus H. Christ on a fucking pogo stick!"

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I've become quite fond of non-standard hallowing of curse words. I use Holy Hell and Holy Fuck a lot. For some reason I don't use the more standard Holy Shit quite as often.

 

Libertus

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