R. S. Martin Posted March 31, 2010 Share Posted March 31, 2010 Forgive me, O most sacred FSM! I got thy holy flight confused with mere mortals. We do not baptize deities--what was I thinking. Shame on me! Brakeman, the best answer to your question is that infants must be baptized in whatever manner the local priest of FSM deems appropriate. The method does not matter so long as infants are ensured a place in the realm in case they die and the FSM pass over. The important thing is that the FSM find and pick them up with his noodly appendage before the aliens claim them for their fire-pit. Um, at least, that is how I think it is. I hope to be corrected if I am wrong. I haven't actually read the Holy Writ of FSM. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Godtastic Posted April 12, 2010 Share Posted April 12, 2010 Everyone knows the proof is in the pudding! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RachelSkates Posted August 20, 2010 Share Posted August 20, 2010 Run from X-ers asking for anything. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirPhoenix Posted November 27, 2010 Share Posted November 27, 2010 If one is touched by His noodley appendage one is never the same. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MFerguson Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 This thread is full of win. So many great contributions. I would like to put this nearly 2 year old post back into the spotlight, as I think it is one of the best and being post # 80 on the bottom of a page it might have been overlooked a bit. Post 80 , by Looking4Answers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hereticzero Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 I am spagnostic because all the recipes appear to be written by different chefs over time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Foxy Methoxy Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 It's sad to me when I see lost children who don't know Bob Dobbs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BettyRubble Posted May 13, 2011 Share Posted May 13, 2011 I have a friend with a FSM logo on his car, so I asked him about it and was converted immediately - proving the power of FSM. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TripMarz Posted July 7, 2011 Share Posted July 7, 2011 FSM is real and loves you unconditionally even more than any dog. The FSM does not care if you use red sauce or white sauce... or even clams. The FSM does not care if you worship him, for he is not a 'cult leader' like other religions follow... For He (it) is the real pasta. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LivingLife Posted July 7, 2011 Share Posted July 7, 2011 FSM is real and loves you unconditionally even more than any dog. The FSM does not care if you use red sauce or white sauce... or even clams. The FSM does not care if you worship him, for he is not a 'cult leader' like other religions follow... For He (it) is the real pasta. Damn universalists Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Josefe Posted July 27, 2011 Share Posted July 27, 2011 Since when did Christians concern themselves with proof. Ask a Christians to show you proof and they refer you to faith; or tell you god has to show you the proof to find it. Well, I have faith in the Flying Spaghetti Monster then; and the only way to find proof is to be a true believe of FSM. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ireckinso Posted August 28, 2011 Share Posted August 28, 2011 disregard Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Perfessor Posted November 7, 2011 Share Posted November 7, 2011 So this is what clergy do on their day off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
London Posted December 5, 2011 Share Posted December 5, 2011 I have learned so much from all of you, but the Fork of the FSM that I have always been taught does not contain meatballs. It is forbidden by the virgin Mary Nair-ah. According to the book of Semolina, you must embrace the whole grain goodness, for it is filling. It is the fiber of our beliefs. Basil, our pasta-er, he's actually Swedish, likes to keep it all very fresh for us. Green is good says the FSM. My favorite time of the year is when we go to the harvest celebration where wheat is milled & roma's are picked and made into the most succulant sauce. I am a Barillian, but we are taught to be accepting of the De Cecco's, Ronzoni's, Buitoni's and the dreaded Creamette's. Our larder always teaches us to stay away from Alfredo, for it is the way of the wicked, heart stopping death. The FSM is heightened when swimming in red. And purified when using the salt of the sea. Recent discoveries have proven that Soba, Udon, Couscous and others were the beginning of the FSM. Contrary to popular belief the BRD (baked rice dish) was not the original diety. And further proof has been found that the BRD was not a child of FSM, they did not have a falling out. The BRD was not trying to tempt the followers of the FSM to be "carbed" on the darkside of the BRD. Complete fiction made up by those who believe in the, what's his name? the guy who was nailed to the wooden stick thingie? You know, they ate his flesh & drank his blood? Hmmm... some cannibal thing, can't really remember right now. I must be hungry... Anyhow, just thought I would share from my childhood. Bless you all <sprinkles everyone with oregano flakes>, RAmen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackpudd1n Posted December 5, 2011 Share Posted December 5, 2011 I have learned so much from all of you, but the Fork of the FSM that I have always been taught does not contain meatballs. It is forbidden by the virgin Mary Nair-ah. According to the book of Semolina, you must embrace the whole grain goodness, for it is filling. It is the fiber of our beliefs. Basil, our pasta-er, he's actually Swedish, likes to keep it all very fresh for us. Green is good says the FSM. My favorite time of the year is when we go to the harvest celebration where wheat is milled & roma's are picked and made into the most succulant sauce. I am a Barillian, but we are taught to be accepting of the De Cecco's, Ronzoni's, Buitoni's and the dreaded Creamette's. Our larder always teaches us to stay away from Alfredo, for it is the way of the wicked, heart stopping death. The FSM is heightened when swimming in red. And purified when using the salt of the sea. Recent discoveries have proven that Soba, Udon, Couscous and others were the beginning of the FSM. Contrary to popular belief the BRD (baked rice dish) was not the original diety. And further proof has been found that the BRD was not a child of FSM, they did not have a falling out. The BRD was not trying to tempt the followers of the FSM to be "carbed" on the darkside of the BRD. Complete fiction made up by those who believe in the, what's his name? the guy who was nailed to the wooden stick thingie? You know, they ate his flesh & drank his blood? Hmmm... some cannibal thing, can't really remember right now. I must be hungry... Anyhow, just thought I would share from my childhood. Bless you all <sprinkles everyone with oregano flakes>, RAmen Is it blasphemy to adore, worship, and love a good risotto cooked completely on the stove and not in the oven? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
London Posted December 6, 2011 Share Posted December 6, 2011 I have learned so much from all of you, but the Fork of the FSM that I have always been taught does not contain meatballs. It is forbidden by the virgin Mary Nair-ah. According to the book of Semolina, you must embrace the whole grain goodness, for it is filling. It is the fiber of our beliefs. Basil, our pasta-er, he's actually Swedish, likes to keep it all very fresh for us. Green is good says the FSM. My favorite time of the year is when we go to the harvest celebration where wheat is milled & roma's are picked and made into the most succulant sauce. I am a Barillian, but we are taught to be accepting of the De Cecco's, Ronzoni's, Buitoni's and the dreaded Creamette's. Our larder always teaches us to stay away from Alfredo, for it is the way of the wicked, heart stopping death. The FSM is heightened when swimming in red. And purified when using the salt of the sea. Recent discoveries have proven that Soba, Udon, Couscous and others were the beginning of the FSM. Contrary to popular belief the BRD (baked rice dish) was not the original diety. And further proof has been found that the BRD was not a child of FSM, they did not have a falling out. The BRD was not trying to tempt the followers of the FSM to be "carbed" on the darkside of the BRD. Complete fiction made up by those who believe in the, what's his name? the guy who was nailed to the wooden stick thingie? You know, they ate his flesh & drank his blood? Hmmm... some cannibal thing, can't really remember right now. I must be hungry... Anyhow, just thought I would share from my childhood. Bless you all <sprinkles everyone with oregano flakes>, RAmen Is it blasphemy to adore, worship, and love a good risotto cooked completely on the stove and not in the oven? It is perfectly acceptable as long as it is not watery or mushy. THOSE are the sins of the BRD. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackpudd1n Posted December 6, 2011 Share Posted December 6, 2011 I have learned so much from all of you, but the Fork of the FSM that I have always been taught does not contain meatballs. It is forbidden by the virgin Mary Nair-ah. According to the book of Semolina, you must embrace the whole grain goodness, for it is filling. It is the fiber of our beliefs. Basil, our pasta-er, he's actually Swedish, likes to keep it all very fresh for us. Green is good says the FSM. My favorite time of the year is when we go to the harvest celebration where wheat is milled & roma's are picked and made into the most succulant sauce. I am a Barillian, but we are taught to be accepting of the De Cecco's, Ronzoni's, Buitoni's and the dreaded Creamette's. Our larder always teaches us to stay away from Alfredo, for it is the way of the wicked, heart stopping death. The FSM is heightened when swimming in red. And purified when using the salt of the sea. Recent discoveries have proven that Soba, Udon, Couscous and others were the beginning of the FSM. Contrary to popular belief the BRD (baked rice dish) was not the original diety. And further proof has been found that the BRD was not a child of FSM, they did not have a falling out. The BRD was not trying to tempt the followers of the FSM to be "carbed" on the darkside of the BRD. Complete fiction made up by those who believe in the, what's his name? the guy who was nailed to the wooden stick thingie? You know, they ate his flesh & drank his blood? Hmmm... some cannibal thing, can't really remember right now. I must be hungry... Anyhow, just thought I would share from my childhood. Bless you all <sprinkles everyone with oregano flakes>, RAmen Is it blasphemy to adore, worship, and love a good risotto cooked completely on the stove and not in the oven? It is perfectly acceptable as long as it is not watery or mushy. THOSE are the sins of the BRD. Whew! I guess I'm okay then Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheBluegrassSkeptic Posted December 29, 2011 Share Posted December 29, 2011 I would say this is a total troll. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prestissimo Posted January 19, 2012 Share Posted January 19, 2012 I've seen the flying spaghetti monster with my own eyes. After I drained the water it was cooked in, I tried shaking a little oil through the spaghetti and when I made this up-down movement the spaghetti went up and down too!! As if that wasn't proof enough, when I increased the speed in which I changed directions, the spaghetti went flying!! When I ate it I could feel it inside me!!! It was such an intense experience. Everything fell into place, I love him with all my heart! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luv2knit Posted January 19, 2012 Share Posted January 19, 2012 Y'all will be so proud of me! This Christmas I was invited to a friends party at their new house. They are atheists. I did lot of talking with her when I was deconverting. I wanted to make a house warming gift for them. I was digging around on the knitting forum I belong to and found a FSM Christmas ornament. I had to make them one!!! So I felted them a FSM! My husband was a little weirded out by it, but I assured him they would get a HUGE kick out of it. When she pulled it out of the bag she freaked, threw her arms around me, gave me a big smooch on my check and skipped off to find her husband. We all had a good laugh! No one else at the party knew what the heck we were talking about. It was fabulous! So yes the FSM exists! Ha! Ha! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
London Posted January 19, 2012 Share Posted January 19, 2012 That is the coolest gift ever. And I'll bet it was really cute too. You could start a shop on Etsy doing that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midniterider Posted January 20, 2012 Share Posted January 20, 2012 Y'all will be so proud of me! This Christmas I was invited to a friends party at their new house. They are atheists. I did lot of talking with her when I was deconverting. I wanted to make a house warming gift for them. I was digging around on the knitting forum I belong to and found a FSM Christmas ornament. I had to make them one!!! So I felted them a FSM! My husband was a little weirded out by it, but I assured him they would get a HUGE kick out of it. When she pulled it out of the bag she freaked, threw her arms around me, gave me a big smooch on my check and skipped off to find her husband. We all had a good laugh! No one else at the party knew what the heck we were talking about. It was fabulous! So yes the FSM exists! Ha! Ha! The FSM causes at least as much joy in fellowship as those that worship the cross-hanger. He must be real! Ra-men. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirChaseph Posted February 25, 2012 Share Posted February 25, 2012 The FSM website is great, I love reading the Christian rants. Easy way to knock out an afternoon. As far as proof, HELLO. Less pirates, more global warming. It's a true statistic that is impossible to prove otherwise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DrGuitar Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 I think his post was tongue in cheek, but the idea of a debate based on the non-biblical evidence for Jesus is a good one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annier Posted February 14, 2013 Share Posted February 14, 2013 I just spent a good half hour in fits of laughter, going through this whole thread. I need to calm down now. HAIL, THE FSM, O MOST NOODLY ONE!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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