Desperate Christians

[Caretaker]

Some Christians are so desperate to validate Christianity, they will say anything.

 

Tell us some of the most outrageous claims and lines of reasoning Christians have ever given you to attempt to validate their faith.

 

 

I will have to post mine later, as I gotta run to school.

[Vixentrox]

"God said it, I believe it, that settles it!" 

 

I saw that load of crap on a bumper sticker yesterday.  When I was a Christian, everything was reasoned with a simple, but what I thought "powerful" little phrase:  The bible says so.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Yeah, that's a pretty common one.

[MQTA]

"Just look around you, that's proof of a creator"

 

 

Yeah... ok, MAYBE, but proof of a painter doesn't mean the painter was that which is described in the Bible and Churches.

 

They take this leap from 2+2 to proving a quadratic formula with match sticks.

 

QED

[Lizard]

The most ridiculous to me..and I can't remember it clearly because my brain shut down as it droned on and on, had to come from the Creation Evidence Museum .

Most of it was pure nonsense, but when they came to the part about "time dilation/the rest of the universe is older than earth and that's how we have a 6000 year old earth with a billions of years old universe", it was utter nonsense.

 

Or really bad sci fi..not sure which yet.

 

SN- I HATE that statement more than most others!

 

Another would be the "God is everywhere" statement. I countered with "Is god in hell?" "Uhm, no, why would god be in hell?" "Well, he's everywhere!

[thomas]

Some Christians are so desperate to validate Christianity, they will say anything.

 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

In my view, the most stupid thing is when Christians appeal to God's logic.

 

Logic is related to the way we as humans process and categorize information. WE do not use a special dog logic for understanding dogs, a monkey logic for understanding monkes etc. We use human logic because we are humans.

 

So in order to understand the Christian God, we must also use human logic. And if human logic isn't capable of that in a proper way, then the conclusion must be that the concept of God is meaningless to humans.

[Thurisaz]

Kind of an Asatru insider, but anyway...

 

...one of those perfect examples for fundies who want to appear smart and educated took place a long time ago on tribble forces.

 

One of the local numbnuts there tried to convince me that the Poetic Edda is just a ripoff of the wholly babble (written and inspired by of course...) by pointing me to the following Edda verse:

 

21. The war I remember, | the first in the world,

When the gods with spears | had smitten Gollveig,

And in the hall | of Hor had burned her,

Three times burned, | and three times born,

Oft and again, | yet ever she lives.

 

22. Heith they named her | who sought their home,

The wide-seeing witch, | in magic wise;

Minds she bewitched | that were moved by her magic,

To evil women | a joy she was.

 

Mr I'm-such-a-smart-believer said that "of course" this is the same eeeeeebil woman that the babble refers to in the revilation. Yeah, right. Gollveig, legend has it, brought Gold and other tempting goodies to the High Gods in the beginning - I'm sure that by Fundie Logic™ this is perfectly equal to the Whore of Babylon™ supposedly described in the book of lies. Note how the verses above clearly describe the war as "the first in the world". Like we say over here... "Wer lesen kann, ist klar im Vorteil" (Those who can read, they have a huge advantage indeed).

 

(Hey - that's a rhyme! )

 

Aaaaah, the idiocy...

 

As for the more generic nonsense... how many pages am I allowed to use up?

[Amethyst]

So far, these are the arguments my fundy cube mate has used.

 

The Bible says it is, so it must be real.

 

We exist, therefore god exists.

 

There is archeological evidence to support the Bible (Apparently he doesn't know it's been debunked. I told him, but he still wouldn't believe me.)

 

A friend of his wrote a persuasive essay, so god must be real because his friend believes it is.

 

Creation is complex, therefore it must have been created by somebody, and that somebody must have been the Christian god.

 

I believe, therefore it's real.

 

My parents told me it was real, therefore it must be. (Yes, he's 30 and still uses that one.)

 

Every common excuse there is, he's used, and sometimes more than once, even after I debunked it.

 

Oh, and my personal favorite weird one? The Transformers is like the Bible, so therefore it's real.

[Clergicide]

Blaming the looting after Katrina on lack of Faith-based education in this country was a new low in my book.

[Guest Unborn Again]

Many Christians like to claim that if you're not religious, i.e. a member of some organized sect, that something else must therefore fill in as your "religion" (golf, atheism, communism, whatever), since "we all have to believe in something."

 

Also, as we have seen recently, and which others are commenting on, is the absurd idea that god is directing storms ashore as retribution for the supposed sinful nature of New Orleans (I guess the Mississippi Gulf Coast must be a hotbed of sin, too). These same fools would scoff at those who would believe that there are spirits in nature (such as in many Native American traditions), yet they believe their loving/vengeful god directs weather patterns in such a way as to take out the perceived disobedient masses (poor minorities for the most part, apparently!).

[spamandham]

Tell us some of the most outrageous claims and lines of reasoning Christians have ever given you to attempt to validate their faith.

 

The most outrageous possible is, "you just have to have faith".

[Shadfox]

"Science can't explain everything..."

 

I hate when this wildcard is played, whether it be a Christian or a pagan. Just because Science doesn't have a complete explanation for the origin of life yet doesn't mean your fantasy is instantly validated.

[Brutal Brian]

Quoting a Xtian Kid's song,

 

Yes Jesus loves me for the Bible tells me so.

 

or a bumper sticker I have seen...

If there's no God, You'd better be right.

 

It is at these times I start humming Metal lyrics just to keep them damn thoughts out of my mind or to calm myself down......

[Ouroboros]

"God said it, I believe it, that settles it!" 

 

I saw that load of crap on a bumper sticker yesterday.  When I was a Christian, everything was reasoned with a simple, but what I thought "powerful" little phrase:  The bible says so.

SSDS: Self-suspended-disbelief syndrome (I just made it up)

[Ouroboros]

Some Christians are so desperate to validate Christianity, they will say anything.

AAAAH!!.. I remeber I did. Shit... I feel so ashamed. All the times I decided to push down any thoughts of doubt or reasoning that contradicted what I wanted to believe. It all was going back to that I wanted to keep my faith, even when everything was against it.

 

Tell us some of the most outrageous claims and lines of reasoning Christians have ever given you to attempt to validate their faith.

I will have to post mine later, as I gotta run to school.

"In your heart you do believe in God, but you are rejecting him." or something similar. Basically everyone knows that God exists, even atheists, but they are in cognitive defiance against the Truth™.

[Guest aexapo]

There is archeological evidence to support the Bible (Apparently he doesn't know it's been debunked. I told him, but he still wouldn't believe me.)

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

The "archeological evidence" does justify some of the cities mentioned, but just because certain parts of the bible contain historical data doesn't mean that God exists.

 

"T'was the Night Before Christmas" mentions the North Pole, but that doesn't validate the existence of Santa Claus. -- I've used that argument before when confronted with their nutiness

[Max]

I think the best once come out of so-called creation "science" and "intelligent" design. I love it when they try to abuse the second law of thermodynamics as proof of god.

 

The gross simplification of the law says the that the universe tends toward increasing entropy. Entropy is sometimes explained as a degree of disorder. Fundies then put together that the universe by nature becomes more disorderly, so humans could not develop by nature, because we're apparently orderly. They've confused complexity with order.

[Amethyst]

"T'was the Night Before Christmas" mentions the North Pole, but that doesn't validate the existence of Santa Claus. -- I've used that argument before when confronted with their nutiness

 

Well, yeah. Spider-Man takes place in New York. Does that mean Peter Parker is real? If so, where the heck is he when we really need him? Also, there is a real town called Smallville. I forget where; it just might be in Kansas. It was named after the town in the Superman comics. Does that mean Superman is real? Unfortunately, no.

[Ouroboros]

I think the best once come out of so-called creation "science" and "intelligent" design.  I love it when they try to abuse the second law of thermodynamics as proof of god. 

 

The gross simplification of the law says the that the universe tends toward increasing entropy.  Entropy is sometimes explained as a degree of disorder.  Fundies then put together that the universe by nature becomes more disorderly, so humans could not develop by nature, because we're apparently orderly.  They've confused complexity with order.

God is supposed to be the source of order, and if the universe is going to disorder, than I guess it's the devil that's running the show. And if the Christian Body, the "Church", is broken up into so many factions, does it mean that God is not in control of the Christian Church either? Just asking.

 

I recently read about some new ideas in the entropy question. Tsallis q Entropy it's called, and it specifies different kinds of order. Not all scientist buy into it yet though, but there's still a lot to learn about the Universe. Dark matter, quantum gravity, vacuum energy. Maybe some day they say that the Universe keeps on renewing itself constantly, and new energy and matter is popping up here and there. That would put the whole issue on its head.

[Ouroboros]

Well, yeah.  Spider-Man takes place in New York.  Does that mean Peter Parker is real?  If so, where the heck is he when we really need him?  Also, there is a real town called Smallville.  I forget where; it just might be in Kansas.  It was named after the town in the Superman comics.  Does that mean Superman is real?  Unfortunately, no.

There's a town called Hell in England, so Hell does exist though.

[Amethyst]

Little Heaven

 

There's also a town called Little Heaven in Delaware. So I guess Heaven exists, also. It's just smaller than we thought it would be.

 

 

There is also a Heaven Heights in Massachusetts, a Heavener in Oklahoma, and a Heavener Grove in West Virginia. Also, there is an Angel, Alabama and an Angel, Ohio, and an Angel City in both Florida and Texas. But there are more town names that start with Devils than Angel. Somehow, I'm not surprised.

[Ouroboros]

Little Heaven

 

There's also a town called Little Heaven in Delaware.  So I guess Heaven exists, also.  It's just smaller than we thought it would be.

 

 

There is also a Heaven Heights in Massachusetts, a Heavener in Oklahoma, and a Heavener Grove in West Virginia.

Do they have any proof that Jesus went there to prepare the housing for the elected few? I mean, wasn't that what he supposedly did during those (almost) 3 days? Are there any dead relatives living there?

[Amethyst]

Do they have any proof that Jesus went there to prepare the housing for the elected few? I mean, wasn't that what he supposedly did during those (almost) 3 days? Are there any dead relatives living there?

 

I don't think there is any proof, but you could always write to their City Hall and ask.

[Lunar Shadow]

here is the one that sticks out in my mind

 

 

"It doesn't matter what you believe in, as long as you know and believe that Jesus is the son of gawd and died for your sins"

 

 

[necrosmith]

God's ways are not our ways.

 

That always annoyed me.

 

To which my reply was, well guess I don't have to worry about it then.

[spamandham]

"Once the Profit speaks, the thinking has been done"

 

 

I think you meant 'prophet', but I like your version better!