I Have So Many Questions

[Mr. Neil]

I visited this site a few months ago and I even registered an account. However, I showed no compassion to most, if not all the deconverting Christians. I made rude, heartless, and inappropriate comments to people who were genuinely seeking a way out of Christianity. I do apologize for my ignorance. Despite the fact that I am still a Christian, I have many questions about the faith. As a matter of fact, I proclaim with my mouth that Jesus Christ is Lord, but deep down inside I question my very own Christian beliefs. What a hypocrite I have been!!! I preached the gospel so adamantly on this site to that the Webmaster blocked my account.

It's good that you have questions about your faith. Just be advised that regardless of who you ask, you're going to get a biased answer. If you go to a church member, you know what you're going to get. If you come here, you know what you're going to get. Ultimately, it's always going to be up to you to make the decision that's right for you.

 

 

My own sister has been a closet atheist for a year. She has managed to hide her religious views from our immediate family members because she feared rejection. However, she confided in me that she no longer believed in the inerrancy of the bible or the divinity of Jesus. I must add that my sister has been visiting this site for a while, and she attributes her deconversion to the countless testimonials that she read on this site. I was upset when she shared her beliefs with me. I wanted to fast and pray on her behalf and plead with God to save her soul. But, I noticed a change in her behavior-- she didn't blame Satan for her mistakes anymore. She has slowlly begun taking responsibility for her actions as well as her own life. She seems happier than before. She is content, she doesn't carry any guilt for sins (supposedly committed conciously or subconciously),she looks for logical explanations for supernatural occurrences (I call them miracles). From time to time, she thanks God for His mercy and Grace, but she doesn't believe a word of it.

It's quite a bit different than the picture they paint of atheism on Trinity Broadcasting Network, isn't it?

 

Your sister is not unusual. Lots of people are happier after they leave faith.

 

It's also not unusual for people to retain the language of religion in our speech. Most people here probably still say "bless you" to someone who sneezes. Personally, I would find it to be more neurotic if I were to change the way I talk just because I don't believe.

 

 

Why is she happier than me? I am always looking for approval from my fellow Christians. I am so afraid of backsliding that I have nightmares. I have been reading testimonials from this site; however, the Lord has hold on my life. He has called me to be a prayer warrior. I am just babbling. Lately, I have been having doubts about my beliefs.My sister devoted a lot of time to reading and researching the history of Christianity. I am afraid to venture into such uncertain route... What if I find something that shatters my frail faith.

Truthfully, there is no surefire recipe for happiness. Some people feel liberated to give up faith. Others become woefully depressed after they deconvert. A lot of what you hear about atheists is that they want to rebel from God and revel in their sin, but some people step away from faith because they'd rather choose a sobering reality over a comforting falsehood.

 

It all depends on the person. If you were to decide that there's no truth in religion, there's nothing I can say to guarantee that you'll be happier as an atheist.

 

Reality has its sober moments.

 

 

I pretend to be 'have it all under control' so that my brothers and sisters and Christ can be encouraged, but I have failed as a woman of God. I pray powerful and emotional prayers and i can share some mind-shattering testimonies of God's goodness and might. But, why do I feel like there is something wrong? I cannot pinpoint it...it is a gut feeling. What do I do? My God has to be real!!! What about the miracles that he has performed in my own life? There has to be a God!

 

Once again, I apologize to those that I have hurt by my hurtful comments in the past. Please, Help me!!!!

What do you mean by miracles? Are we talking actual miracles or just good fortune? In either case, the bias of the mind is to seek what it wants to confirm.

 

If you're talking about good fortune, then that's not a miracle. People win the lottery. It happens.

 

If you're talking about seeing actual miracles, such as the act of a faith healer, then I suggest you hop on Google and search for James Randi and Peter Popoff.

[Nara]

...the Lord has hold on my life. He has called me...I pray powerful and emotional prayers...i can share some mind-shattering testimonies of God's goodness and might...My God has to be real!!! What about the miracles that he has performed in my own life? There has to be a God!...Please, Help me!!!!

 

If you remain a Christian, you get to keep enjoying the ego boost of

1. believing you are extra special and acting on behalf of God ("the Lord has hold on my life. He has called me")

2. believing you are magically powerful ("I pray powerful and emotional prayers")

3. getting gushing approval for your "mind-shattering" verbal performances from a target audience ("i can share some mind-shattering testimonies of God's goodness and might")

4. believing you are in favor with a supreme being who is apt to intervene for you ("the miracles that he has performed in my own life") and, well, maybe that makes you just a little bit superior to all those poor schmucks who aren't quite where you are with the Lord...just sayin', right? (It's not just you, we all enjoy a little boost of smug and "holier than thou" now and then. It's a human thing.)

 

Really, it sounds like you have to choose what kind of happiness you want.

 

If you are satisfied with the happiness of a falsely generated ego boost, you should throw yourself into religion and try hard to block the questioning. In that case, don't ask for help from ex-Christians (wtf, right?)--Ask for help from your target audience: your favorite brand of True Believers. They will be thrilled to help you patch up and maintain the delusion, and will work hard to envelop you in magical interpretations of events ("a miracle!!!"), suggest how a supreme being is talking to you or to them about you, and treat you to staged "powerful and emotional" group experiences in church. Enjoy!

 

On the other hand, if you've seen too much, and you can't pull the wool over your own eyes anymore, you will feel torn and anxious for a while, and you won't be happy until you relinquish the false ego boost you've been getting. At first, it's deflating: I'm not that special, no one else is responsible for my good or bad behavior, I'm not plugged into any kind of magic power, my "miracles" can be otherwise accounted for and I have to find a whole new target audience and topic for my persuasive, verbal performance skills and talents before I can bask in group approval. Bummer, right? You would have to grieve for it awhile along with the wasted time, the lost social ties and the sense of having been cruelly duped. Then you would have to figure out what really makes you special, what values you are going to live by, what skills and talents you want to develop, and whose approval really matters to you, and how much. Along the way, you would start to feel better.

 

(On a positive note, compared to the hard work of building a strong reality-based ego, switching to an alternative source for your smugness fix is extremely easy.)

 

Thanks for your elaborate response. Prayer gives me some hope. When I don't pray, I feel that I am missing something. Sometimes, I have dreams that foretell the future. How can science explain prophetic dreams?

[Nara]

We all want to believe in god, that's why we did in the first place. It's comforting to have that to fall back onto. No need to fear if you know you're protected right? But in the end it's all emotional, it's what we're taught. When you're grasping for anything your going to take anything, and Christianity is not only something it's something with a lot of detailed instructions. Much easier than just figuring out life as you go.

 

Seek god, listen for him. I found that there isn't anyone there. Feelings are tricky, and it's easy to feel like god is doing that or telling you to do this. That's just a product of your belief system, and the things that you have been made to believe. If you pray long enough the things you ask for will usually come about soon or later. Mostly because that's life, stuff happens, things change. But what if they don't? god doesn't want to answer you? Why is he so selective when we were taught to believe for whatever and it would be?

 

If you have more excuses than answers it may be time to rethink where you stand.

 

Dezine, How do you deal with life struggles? Like most pentecostals who believe in miracles, prophetic gifts, evils spirits, angels, healing, word of knowledge and so on, I believe that God speaks to me in dreams. I see future events in dreams. Usually after I fast and pray about a situation, I end up having dreams that shows me what will happen (about the situation). The events always happen. How is that possible?

[Moxie]

I'm not so sure that science can fully explain what you call "prophetic dreams", but that is the beauty of science. Science does not pretend to have all the answers. It tests educated guesses against reality and continues to do so until an answer is found. Christianity, however, claims to have all the answers. Claiming to have all the answers is a coping mechanism for dealing with fear of the unknown.

[Nara]

Perhaps your way of dealing with your perceived failure is to lash out.

 

You should ask your sister why she is happier than you. None of us can speak for her however several reasons might be that she feels liberated from the fear of failure, fear of Hell, fear of judgement and is now content with not needing to know why she is here or what her purpose is. I would also guess that she is comfortable with the fact that when she's dead, that's it, game over. She has no expectations of an afterlife and doesn't feel the need for it. But again, you should ask her yourself.

 

BTW, being afraid to study the history of Christianity doesn't say a lot about the integrity of your faith. Ignoring the facts doesn't make them any less true.

 

 

My sister thinks that I am judgemental. In the past few months, I have been trying to 'win her back for Jesus' with regular testimonies and quoting Bible verses. If she only knew that I have been lurking on this site, she would be shocked.Lately, I have been trying to avoid discussing religious isuues with her since we have different views. BTW, I started reading a few articles on infidels.org and I am more confused than ever. But, I am determined to find the truth.

[Nara]

Thanks a lot. I thought that Christians were forgiving, I was wrong. I just have this gut feeling that something is wrong with Christianity, but I can't put my finger on it. When I pray, I feel like I am talking to myself. As i mentioned before, I have a number of testimonies about miracles that have happened in my life, but I still wonder. I have been depressed lately... trying to show face. I have a hard time believing in the Garden of Eden, Adam and Eve, and a Talking Snake.

 

How come God does not speak to me the way he communicated with the biblical figures from the Old Testament?

 

How come God does not appears to be involved in human affairs? In fact, I had to solve many problems myself and then give God the credit. I am just confused. How can a Holy-Spirit filled, tongue-speaking, God-fearing woman asks so many blasphemous questions?

 

Ouroboros raises a good point about asking questions. A little background on myself. Years ago I was street witnessing with friends and after being rebuffed and laughed at by most, we found a young kid, about 16-17, who took the time to talk to us. We all went to Denny's together and my friends and I tried to tell him the gospel message while he politely answered back with some pretty tough questions and pointed out some biblical contradictions that I had never encountered.

 

My friends grew more and more frustrated with him, though he was very polite and friendly and as they began to badger him with bible verses, to the point where they were simply just throwing random scripture at him as if it were a weapon, I found myself defending him against my friends.

 

I was quite shaken by the experience, not only because I was embarrassed about my friends, but because if I were completely honest, he raised questions that I had no answers to. I spent the following weeks contemplating this and finally took a drive up into the mountains, took out my journal and I wrote down a commitment I was determined to make both to myself and god that I would never again witness my faith until I held a deeper understanding of it. I wrote that I determined to be a student of life and a seeker of wisdom and truth with the hope that one day I would have the answers and would be an effective witness and servant of god. I determined to ask the hard questions and I reasoned with myself and with god that truth put to the test of fire would survive and that which was not real wasn't worth keeping to begin with. I fully believed that god would give me wisdom and understanding and that in the end this journey I began would bring me closer to him.

 

So I began, prayerfully, earnestly and in a dedicated manner to ask the hard questions. The answers I got surprised me and clearly I'm not a christian anymore but what I did I did via a sense of profound honesty. How can this be sinful? If god is real, if christianity is real, is it wrong to want to learn about it? Is it wrong to be intellectually honest and ask questions about what you have up until now just been told is true? Is it wrong to apply valid critical thinking methods to your beliefs? If it is wrong, isn't there something wrong with that?

 

I wish you luck. In the end, it's you that has to decide and ask the hard questions. If you are indoctrinated you don't need us to indoctrinate you to escape indoctrination, right?

 

Thanks for sharing your experience. I remember the first time that a colleague shared that the story of Noah's Ark shared many similarities with the deluge story told in the Epic of Gilgamesh, I was speechless. i went home and googled 'Epic of Gilgamesh.' After reading most of the epic, I concluded that the devil is a liar. Therefore, I went back to my pentecostal views. However, this time is different... I cannot suppress my inquisitiveness. Whether the truth will drive me away from the faith, I must know.

[Nara]

Part of the problem with Christianity is that for all of the good it promises, it delivers very little. Threats of eternal torture are no way to endear someone to a being that seems so totally absent from our lives.

 

Can you imagine your sister in hell? Would that make heaven more pleasant for you, or would heaven be hell?

 

The doctrine of hell is one of the most damning that the human mind has invented, but it works. Carrot and the stick. What a con, and what a "protection racket." There is no way Hell could be consistent with a god that loves, even if you can convince yourself that those who are destined for hell "chose" to go there simply because they could not believe. What would Christianity be without Hell? Jesus will save you? From what God (Jesus) made? So Jesus is saving you from - Jesus?

 

You were raised or led to believe that some really fantastic things happened that were written in the bible. Other sacred texts are no less miraculous, but you don't believe them. Even though the Roman senate claimed to have seen Augustus Caesar rise bodily into heaven you wouldn't believe it. Mohammed riding a winged horse through the sky? Horse shit. But you believe people that were dead came back to life - like Lazarus. But what then? Did he just die again later?

 

Ever wonder why God never heals amputees? That should give you some pause. It's always those illnesses that could be misdiagnosed, or would get better anyway, or that people never had.

 

Your sister is just taking responsibility for her life without the layers of guilt, fear and dependency that come with Christianity. With one life to live, you can learn, explore and grow.

 

Don't be afraid to read or to learn. If your faith is correct, it should withstand the challenge.

 

 

 

 

I never thought about why God never heals amputees until I read it on the main blog. I have heard stories of people growing new limbs, but I have never witnessed it firsthand. I have heard testimonies about healing supposedly performed by God. I have seen my own mother cast out demons from a neighbor. I have dreams where I saw evil entities trying to smother me... they would not leave until I called the name of Jesus or quote Psalms 91. Now, I have more questions.

[Nara]

I noticed a change in her behavior-- she didn't blame Satan for her mistakes anymore. She has slowlly begun taking responsibility for her actions as well as her own life. She seems happier than before.

I think this is the answer you're looking for, Nara. She is happier because she is taking responsibility for her actions. Her actions and her goals have become her own, not subject to the judgment of church elders or the caprices of an invisible man in the sky or in the bowels of the earth.

 

What if I find something that shatters my frail faith.

This may come across as a bit harsh, but of what use to you is a faith that can shatter that easily?

 

But, why do I feel like there is something wrong? I cannot pinpoint it...it is a gut feeling.

Losing faith is very much like mourning a death in the family, or confronting one's own mortality. It's common, and natural, to feel incredulous -- Not necessarily in the sense of overt disbelief; more along the lines of "This can't be happening to me!" Confusion, anger and even depression may be part of the package. This is uncomfortable, but necessary; it's your mind sorting things out, in essence renewing its contract with reality but doing a lot of editing and discarding.

 

What do I do?

At this point, I would say "Take it slow, and don't say or do anything that you won't be able to undo later." You could also try quiet sitting, long walks and generally watching out for things that put physical or mental stresses on you.

 

 

When I was preaching the gospel on the main blogs, your responses challenged my faith. You asks some deep questions... I avoided answering those questions by using circular logic. I never thought that i would be posting here begging for help. Thanks Astreja.

[Realist]

Hi Nara!

I think you are doing REAL well! You are asking the HARD questions ... you ARE seeking! This will lead you to the truth! Do not fear anthing! Just let it happen! You HAVE to step outside the safe square of indoctrination to ever see these issues!

 

In fact if I were you I WOULD say something to your sister! I am sure she will be very understanding! It will also help both of you as you will have each other as support! I only wish I was fortunate enough to have a family member who was an ex-christian!!!

 

Good luck!

[Overcame Faith]

Nara, if you would like to, why don't you post a description of one of the "miracles" of which you have been a part or one of your "prophetic dreams" so we can know what you are talking about and perhaps help you through a better understanding of what actually happened. Don't feel obligated to do this, but you might find it helpful. If you decide to post one of these, please provide as much detail as possible. We may ask you some questions to gain further facts and perspective.

 

This would in no way be used to ridicule you, I promise. It would only be a way to try to answer your previous call for help.

 

BTW, I think Downtoearth's description of dreams in the above post was excellent and well-worth your consideration.

[Shyone]

It's a real funny thing that I have had dreams that seemed to be fulfilled. Of course, not every detail was "fulfilled", but sort of generally. I dreamed my stepson was getting divorced from his wife, but then they've been having problems for a while, and now they're separated. The dream was a doozy though. Something about a dance deep in Mexico or something. Really wild.

 

I dreamed my bother-in-law and I got lost on a back road in a truck, and he had a wreck in a truck (different kinds of trucks, but... you know - kinda-sorta similar).

 

Anyway, stuff happens, and maybe there is some sense to it. My stepson and his wife. I wish they would divorce. My BIL is a bit reckless.

 

So were they prophetic, or just "predicting" based on things I knew, concerns I had and the like?

 

I think the latter.

[Nara]

I have dreams that foretell the future. How can science explain prophetic dreams?

 

Science can't and doesn't need to explain prophetic dreams, because, I would argue, they don't actually happen.

 

I get that you believe you've had them, but, then, you've been surrounded by all of this magical thinking all your life, and you've been encouraged to draw these kinds of conclusions, so you haven't really had the motivation or the tools to think critically about it. And you want to believe it. If you re-considered it and concluded otherwise, wouldn't it be kind of a letdown? I mean, "I've had some freakishly coincidental dreams" just doesn't have the same ring as "I have prophetic dreams."

 

When your brain dreams something, it's processing mental tidbits of existing situations, books, movies, observations, emotions, personal history, etc. in the form of little, internally hallucinatory vignettes. Sometimes--once in a while--you dream something, and then the something happens. It's not because you had a special power and saw the future. Most of us dream lots of things, all the time, and most of them don't happen (thankfully). On those occasions when, by chance, (and, often because there actually IS a chance that such a thing will take place, and because you've been having emotions--worry or hope or whatever applies--about that possibility), you happen to dream something and--WOW!--it happens!--then, you notice it, and it stands out in your mind. In that circumstance, some folks conclude (falsely) that the dream foretold the future, and, like I was saying before, the conclusions is boosted if they kinda secretly enjoy fancying that they have "prophetic" abilities. (Honestly, I hope you don't take that as a big insult, and I'm afraid that you do. It's not, really, it's just how we are as a species. We like to feel special, one way or another. Me, too. Totally.)

 

The dream thing mostly works like this: Let's say my sister is on a car trip, and say I've been thinking about the potential loss of loved ones recently--an uncle died--and, say I saw a crashed car recently, and my brain has a little worry about my sister's car trip. So, no big surprise, I dream she has an accident. Well, because she actually IS on a car trip, and because you can have an accident when you're on a long, tiring car trip, guess what? There's a small chance she will actually have an accident. Let's say she does! My dream would still be the product of my brain's random processing of the day's worries, new data and observations, etc., and it would not be a prophetic vision of the future. The coincidence might spook me at little, and I might even consider it--"Wow, what was that about?" (Our brains are wired to constantly search for the connections between things, even when there is none).

 

But since I'm a big dork and I feel special by (falsely) believing I'm a good dancer , I'm not very drawn to the (false) belief that my dreams can foretell the future, and reason can prevail.

 

I knew a lady who went on about how she dreamed that her mother died and, just at that exact time, her mother really died! Wow! Come to find out, at the time of the dream, her mother was 90-something, in the final stage of a terminal illness, and on her deathbed. Seriously, she was on her way out at any minute. The lady was devastated about her mother's approaching death, and, when asleep, probably dreamed about her mother almost constantly during that period. The chance of her dream coinciding with the time of her mother's death was pretty darn good. Instead of seeing it as an alarming but understandable coincidence, though, she spent the next decade being terrified every time she had a bad dream. (She was one who didn't secretly enjoy her "gift" because it scared the crap out of her.)

 

I imagine your dreams are more difficult to explain than the examples I cited, but even if it's one of those "Wow, how could you even have imagined that? There's NO WAY!" things, I would still say that random chance, tricky quirks of the human memory system, and other real-world factors, known and unknown, could explain the apparently freakish coincidence.

 

Sweet dreams!

 

Downtoearth,

 

Thanks for taking the time to address my concerns about prophetic dreams. I do understand the way you used a scientific approach to shed light on my ability to dream of future events (that Christians usually refer to as a prophetic gift); however, it will take me a while to let go of certain beliefs. I have been reading, researching, and thinking critically about the tenets of Christianity and I am to uncover the truth. I already kniow that I have been deceived in some ways. For instance, the story of Samson reminds me of Hercules... I used to be supposedly well-versed in Greek mythology, but I was taught that those stories were made up by the devil to instill doubts in fibble Christians. As a result, I abandoned my studies on Greek mythology.

 

Someone asked me once. " How can an intelligent woman like you believe this crap?" I answered, " I have experienced the love of God, so I know He's real." That's a true example cognitive dissonance. I am making progress though. My inquisitive mind doesn't allow me to put my trust in tall tales. Did I just write that?

 

I may be angry, confused, depressed, relieved, sad, happy at times... Mind you, I experience all of these emotions in one day. But, I will take one day at a time...step-by-step...day-by-day.

 

Thanks Downtoearth.

[Nara]

I have dreams that foretell the future. How can science explain prophetic dreams?

 

Science can't and doesn't need to explain prophetic dreams, because, I would argue, they don't actually happen.

 

I get that you believe you've had them, but, then, you've been surrounded by all of this magical thinking all your life, and you've been encouraged to draw these kinds of conclusions, so you haven't really had the motivation or the tools to think critically about it. And you want to believe it. If you re-considered it and concluded otherwise, wouldn't it be kind of a letdown? I mean, "I've had some freakishly coincidental dreams" just doesn't have the same ring as "I have prophetic dreams."

 

When your brain dreams something, it's processing mental tidbits of existing situations, books, movies, observations, emotions, personal history, etc. in the form of little, internally hallucinatory vignettes. Sometimes--once in a while--you dream something, and then the something happens. It's not because you had a special power and saw the future. Most of us dream lots of things, all the time, and most of them don't happen (thankfully). On those occasions when, by chance, (and, often because there actually IS a chance that such a thing will take place, and because you've been having emotions--worry or hope or whatever applies--about that possibility), you happen to dream something and--WOW!--it happens!--then, you notice it, and it stands out in your mind. In that circumstance, some folks conclude (falsely) that the dream foretold the future, and, like I was saying before, the conclusions is boosted if they kinda secretly enjoy fancying that they have "prophetic" abilities. (Honestly, I hope you don't take that as a big insult, and I'm afraid that you do. It's not, really, it's just how we are as a species. We like to feel special, one way or another. Me, too. Totally.)

 

The dream thing mostly works like this: Let's say my sister is on a car trip, and say I've been thinking about the potential loss of loved ones recently--an uncle died--and, say I saw a crashed car recently, and my brain has a little worry about my sister's car trip. So, no big surprise, I dream she has an accident. Well, because she actually IS on a car trip, and because you can have an accident when you're on a long, tiring car trip, guess what? There's a small chance she will actually have an accident. Let's say she does! My dream would still be the product of my brain's random processing of the day's worries, new data and observations, etc., and it would not be a prophetic vision of the future. The coincidence might spook me at little, and I might even consider it--"Wow, what was that about?" (Our brains are wired to constantly search for the connections between things, even when there is none).

 

But since I'm a big dork and I feel special by (falsely) believing I'm a good dancer , I'm not very drawn to the (false) belief that my dreams can foretell the future, and reason can prevail.

 

I knew a lady who went on about how she dreamed that her mother died and, just at that exact time, her mother really died! Wow! Come to find out, at the time of the dream, her mother was 90-something, in the final stage of a terminal illness, and on her deathbed. Seriously, she was on her way out at any minute. The lady was devastated about her mother's approaching death, and, when asleep, probably dreamed about her mother almost constantly during that period. The chance of her dream coinciding with the time of her mother's death was pretty darn good. Instead of seeing it as an alarming but understandable coincidence, though, she spent the next decade being terrified every time she had a bad dream. (She was one who didn't secretly enjoy her "gift" because it scared the crap out of her.)

 

I imagine your dreams are more difficult to explain than the examples I cited, but even if it's one of those "Wow, how could you even have imagined that? There's NO WAY!" things, I would still say that random chance, tricky quirks of the human memory system, and other real-world factors, known and unknown, could explain the apparently freakish coincidence.

 

Sweet dreams!

 

Downtoearth,

 

Thanks for taking the time to address my concerns about prophetic dreams. I do understand the way you used a scientific approach to shed light on my ability to dream of future events (that Christians usually refer to as a prophetic gift); however, it will take me a while to let go of certain beliefs. I have been reading, researching, and thinking critically about the tenets of Christianity and I am willing to uncover the truth. I already kniow that I have been deceived in some ways. For instance, the story of Samson reminds me of Hercules... I used to be supposedly well-versed in Greek mythology, but I was taught that those stories were made up by the devil to instill doubts in fibble Christians. As a result, I abandoned my studies in Greek mythology.

 

Someone asked me once. " How can an intelligent woman like you believe this crap?" I answered, " I have experienced the love of God, so I know He's real." That's a true example cognitive dissonance. I am making progress though. My inquisitive mind doesn't allow me to put my trust in tall tales. Did I just write that?

 

I may be angry, confused, depressed, relieved, sad, happy at times... Mind you, I experience all of these emotions in one day. But, I will take one day at a time...step-by-step...day-by-day.

 

Thanks Downtoearth.

 

How do I edit my post? I hate writing a response that contains numerous grammatical errors? Where is the 'edit' button?

[Overcame Faith]

I don't think you get an "edit" button until a certain number of posts. 25 I think is the magic number.

[Nara]

I don't think you get an "edit" button until a certain number of posts. 25 I think is the magic number.

 

Thanks! I will keep posting until I reach th magic number.

[Nara]

It's a real funny thing that I have had dreams that seemed to be fulfilled. Of course, not every detail was "fulfilled", but sort of generally. I dreamed my stepson was getting divorced from his wife, but then they've been having problems for a while, and now they're separated. The dream was a doozy though. Something about a dance deep in Mexico or something. Really wild.

 

I dreamed my bother-in-law and I got lost on a back road in a truck, and he had a wreck in a truck (different kinds of trucks, but... you know - kinda-sorta similar).

 

Anyway, stuff happens, and maybe there is some sense to it. My stepson and his wife. I wish they would divorce. My BIL is a bit reckless.

 

So were they prophetic, or just "predicting" based on things I knew, concerns I had and the like?

 

I think the latter.

 

I know that there some things that cannot be explained... we may never know. Thanks for reassuring me that I am not losing my mind.

[Michael]

Hi Nara,

 

I am always impressed when people who are struggling get up and try to fix the problem. You have started your search. But you should be aware, that it is a dangerous way you are on. In the end you could loose your faith with all the good sides that are attached to it. So if you dig deeper into your doubts you could become a stronger christian or an ex-believer. A friend of mine was in the same position as you. He choose the other way: He jumped into the middle of the storm and launched his own church. His church is not that big yet, but to their meetings they have 80 - 100 people regularly. He is so busy that there is no time for doubts and he is aware that he must be an example for the other church members. He will say that doubts can strengthen you if you just ignore them. It will bring you "closer to god"...that is his idea. Mother Theresa suffered for many years from great doubts and nobody could help her. She just could not hear gods voice and she felt alone while praying. She was told, that with this silence from god, she would take part in the loneliness that jesus suffered on the cross. Xians with a strong character would get strong tests.

 

Regarding your prophetic dreams: Stuff like this is impressing. One explanation could be that some people are very sensitive. Especially people who are used to work with people (Counselors, police men, pastors ...) have an antenna for the real story behind the obvious things/words/behavior. While we dream, our subconsciousness proceeds the impressions and thoughts and problems of the day and it can happen that things and ideas pop up (inside the dream) that express our "gut feeling" about stuff. I used to have prophetic pictures when I was an active xian. I know some counselors who seem to be mind reading while counseling. Their gut feeling is so close to the real problems...it is amazing.

[Shyone]

I already kniow that I have been deceived in some ways. For instance, the story of Samson reminds me of Hercules... I used to be supposedly well-versed in Greek mythology, but I was taught that those stories were made up by the devil to instill doubts in fibble Christians. As a result, I abandoned my studies on Greek mythology.

 

Someone asked me once. " How can an intelligent woman like you believe this crap?" I answered, " I have experienced the love of God, so I know He's real." That's a true example cognitive dissonance. I am making progress though. My inquisitive mind doesn't allow me to put my trust in tall tales. Did I just write that?

 

I may be angry, confused, depressed, relieved, sad, happy at times... Mind you, I experience all of these emotions in one day. But, I will take one day at a time...step-by-step...day-by-day.

 

Thanks Downtoearth.

I really feel for you. May I suggest, however, that you not set a specific goal except truth. We don't all have to think alike; we just need some way to be ourselves and be as happy as Nature allows.

 

And start reading that Greek Mythology again. It's something good, created by man, and worthy of our respect.

[Phanta]

Nara,

 

I want to welcome you and accept your apology for the writing on the blogs. It takes a high character to have that kind of self-awareness and make a direct apology. I really respect that action.

 

Sorting through beliefs is sometimes a struggle, and it sounds like you are struggling not just with ideas, but with some tough emotions and nightmares and such. Know that you will try new copes and learn new copes if you continue to move away from your current beliefs. There are many other ways of coping out there, and like a child learning to walk, they take learning. Also, if you return to your beliefs from a place of honest assessment, your old copes will be there still for you to pick up and use again.

 

This is just a tough period of seeking.

 

The struggling mind is nurtured with gentleness. Take a deep breath, and be kind to yourself.

 

Phanta

[Overcame Faith]

I may be angry, confused, depressed, relieved, sad, happy at times... Mind you, I experience all of these emotions in one day. But, I will take one day at a time...step-by-step...day-by-day.

 

You are not alone in this, Nara. I and just about everyone here experienced the same thing. It's tough, but it's normal. Keep up the search. It is worth it in the end.

[Nara]

Nara,

 

I want to welcome you and accept your apology for the writing on the blogs. It takes a high character to have that kind of self-awareness and make a direct apology. I really respect that action.

 

Sorting through beliefs is sometimes a struggle, and it sounds like you are struggling not just with ideas, but with some tough emotions and nightmares and such. Know that you will try new copes and learn new copes if you continue to move away from your current beliefs. There are many other ways of coping out there, and like a child learning to walk, they take learning. Also, if you return to your beliefs from a place of honest assessment, your old copes will be there still for you to pick up and use again.

 

This is just a tough period of seeking.

 

The struggling mind is nurtured with gentleness. Take a deep breath, and be kind to yourself.

 

Phanta

 

Thanks for your words of encouragement. I must be honest, I started having doubts years ago. I was too scared to follow my intuition and do research. I backslid a few months ago, went back to Christianity until I realized that I couldn't accept certain tall tales as absolute truths. Therefore, I started doing more research about the faith that I believed in so adamantly.

[Nara]

I may be angry, confused, depressed, relieved, sad, happy at times... Mind you, I experience all of these emotions in one day. But, I will take one day at a time...step-by-step...day-by-day.

 

You are not alone in this, Nara. I and just about everyone here experienced the same thing. It's tough, but it's normal. Keep up the search. It is worth it in the end.

 

Thanks again. I will keep reading the informative articles on this site.

[Nara]

Hi Nara,

 

I am always impressed when people who are struggling get up and try to fix the problem. You have started your search. But you should be aware, that it is a dangerous way you are on. In the end you could loose your faith with all the good sides that are attached to it. So if you dig deeper into your doubts you could become a stronger christian or an ex-believer. A friend of mine was in the same position as you. He choose the other way: He jumped into the middle of the storm and launched his own church. His church is not that big yet, but to their meetings they have 80 - 100 people regularly. He is so busy that there is no time for doubts and he is aware that he must be an example for the other church members. He will say that doubts can strengthen you if you just ignore them. It will bring you "closer to god"...that is his idea. Mother Theresa suffered for many years from great doubts and nobody could help her. She just could not hear gods voice and she felt alone while praying. She was told, that with this silence from god, she would take part in the loneliness that jesus suffered on the cross. Xians with a strong character would get strong tests.

 

Regarding your prophetic dreams: Stuff like this is impressing. One explanation could be that some people are very sensitive. Especially people who are used to work with people (Counselors, police men, pastors ...) have an antenna for the real story behind the obvious things/words/behavior. While we dream, our subconsciousness proceeds the impressions and thoughts and problems of the day and it can happen that things and ideas pop up (inside the dream) that express our "gut feeling" about stuff. I used to have prophetic pictures when I was an active xian. I know some counselors who seem to be mind reading while counseling. Their gut feeling is so close to the real problems...it is amazing.

 

Thanks for advice.

[Guest Justyna]

Nara,

 

I think atheists are happier than you because it just seems like that for now. The Bible talks about the Godless and how happy they are for a moment. And the keyword here being...moment. Dont be deceived.

[Nara]

Nara,

 

I think atheists are happier than you because it just seems like that for now. The Bible talks about the Godless and how happy they are for a moment. And the keyword here being...moment. Dont be deceived.

 

 

Justyna,

 

I know the bible from Genesis to Revelation. I know what the Word says about how the 'wicked prosper.' I do appreciate your attempt to encourage me just like " Apostle Paul encouraged Timothy to remain faithful," but your efforts are futile. My sister told me that as soon as she was able to take responsibility for her own actions and not feel guilty about every mistake she's made, she's been much happier and it shows. I finally mustered the courage to aks her the question a few hours ago. I am beginning to think that life is about the choices we make.

 

I know a few women who have prayed and fasted for God to send them Godly husbands; they supposedly married 'great men of God' who turned out to be abusers, cheaters, liars, dead-beat dads, self-centered, etc. I also have friends who not christians who are married to wonderful worldly men. It is about character... a belief in Christ or going to church regularly has no bearing on one's character.

 

All my Christian friends and acquaintances are struggling with some sort of sins in their lives. They're never content nor satisfied. God is always working in them through the power of the Holy Ghost. They're always worried about pleasing God. When they fall into sin, they receive harsh criticism from their fellow Christians. Or they excuse their behavior by claiming that " I am a sinner saved by grace."

 

How can Christians be happy?