Ro-bear Posted July 12, 2012 Share Posted July 12, 2012 I have noticed that for the last couple of days, these forums have suffered from a dearth of bad poetry. Now, Florduh and I can't fill the entire void ourselves, so I ask your help. I'll start: Obama sucks ass. All that is wrong is his fault. Socialist bastard. Haiku is easy! First line: five syllables Second line: seven syllables Third line: five syllables Of course the Japanese have their picky-ass rules about seasonal references and juxtaposed images and all that crap, but we can ignore that because we are Americans, and we do as we damn well please. If they don't like it, we'll just bomb their asses again. I once assigned Haiku to a class of seniors. I brought in a stack of newspapers and said "Find a Haiku in there and give birth to it. Articles, ads, letters to the editor, movie reviews...I don't care. Go to it." Surprisingly, I got some good stuff. Most student poetry is horrible, just like the one I wrote and the ones that are regularly inflicted on us by other members. But for this assignment I got some real winners. Here is one I have never forgotten: Such an ugly couch Hideously on display; No one will buy you. I know I've set the bar pretty high here, but don't be intimidated. You can write poetry just as bad. Go to it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jblueep Posted July 12, 2012 Share Posted July 12, 2012 Once delusional Rationality prevailed Freedom forever Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator florduh Posted July 12, 2012 Super Moderator Share Posted July 12, 2012 Douche-bear has some skills! He can do as well as teach. Good, for a leftist. Well, SOMEBODY has to fill the void. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcdaddy Posted July 12, 2012 Share Posted July 12, 2012 Legion, where u at? Miss your insane fascist shit Not really, i dont. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ro-bear Posted July 12, 2012 Author Share Posted July 12, 2012 Douche-bear has some skills! He can do as well as teach. Good, for a leftist. Well, SOMEBODY has to fill the void. I knew I could count on you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jblueep Posted July 12, 2012 Share Posted July 12, 2012 atheist fucking i am a big fan of it I'm just saying dude 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ro-bear Posted July 12, 2012 Author Share Posted July 12, 2012 Romney has great hair Looks like fucking Superman Think I'll vote for him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ro-bear Posted July 12, 2012 Author Share Posted July 12, 2012 Summer vacation Has only a few weeks left. Back to work, Ro-bear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcdaddy Posted July 12, 2012 Share Posted July 12, 2012 Since Jblue turned Athe, Putting it in correct hole. Sex is much better. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ro-bear Posted July 13, 2012 Author Share Posted July 13, 2012 Florduh remembers The lessons of history Because he was there. That's an "old" joke in case anyone doesn't get it. Oops! Made the baby Jesus cry again. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator florduh Posted July 13, 2012 Super Moderator Share Posted July 13, 2012 I know history. Of course I remember it. I made most of it. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kaiser01 Posted July 13, 2012 Share Posted July 13, 2012 Man i suck at poetry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackpudd1n Posted July 13, 2012 Share Posted July 13, 2012 I've got a pimple, It sits on my left dimple; Somebody please help! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcdaddy Posted July 13, 2012 Share Posted July 13, 2012 [quote name=blackpudd1n' Lgtimestamp='1342211279' post='786438] I've got a pimple, It sits on my left dimple; Somebody please help! Fingers on each side Push together and squeeze it Juice on the mirror 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ro-bear Posted July 14, 2012 Author Share Posted July 14, 2012 [quote name=blackpudd1n' Lgtimestamp='1342211279' post='786438] I've got a pimple, It sits on my left dimple; Somebody please help! Fingers on each side Push together and squeeze it Juice on the mirror My, but that one is a thing of beauty. I look forward to reading more upon my return. It's off to the beach for the Ro-bear family. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ro-bear Posted July 14, 2012 Author Share Posted July 14, 2012 Off to Isle of Palms Seven days of beach heaven See you in a week. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcdaddy Posted July 14, 2012 Share Posted July 14, 2012 Off to Isle of Palms Seven days of beach heaven See you in a week. Have fun in the sun Drink plenty of cold Mai Thais Don't burn your white ass Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator florduh Posted July 14, 2012 Super Moderator Share Posted July 14, 2012 Sand up in your crack Suntan lotion in your eyes Fun times at the beach. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackpudd1n Posted July 14, 2012 Share Posted July 14, 2012 Sand in my 'gina Bikini top lost in ocean Where have my pants gone?! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kaiser01 Posted July 14, 2012 Share Posted July 14, 2012 Sand in my 'gina Bikini top lost in ocean Where have my pants gone?! that must be uncomfortable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackpudd1n Posted July 14, 2012 Share Posted July 14, 2012 Sand in my 'gina Bikini top lost in ocean Where have my pants gone?! that must be uncomfortable. Unfortunately, it is an all-too-common reality for many women. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcdaddy Posted July 14, 2012 Share Posted July 14, 2012 Sand in my 'gina Bikini top lost in ocean Where have my pants gone?! Look at Pud's ta-tas Her top floats on the waters Ouch! Punch in the eye. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TrailBlazer Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 I wrote this one in high school. Wish I could have passed this gem in to my teacher! I suck at haiku Dammit, something's not right Now I'm pissed, f* you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thought2Much Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 This is a haiku It uses five-seven-five Syllabic structure That last haiku was Self-referential, and so Could be called "meta" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thought2Much Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 This really could be The worst haiku ever, since It's missing 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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