Popular Post bfuddled Posted July 12, 2014 Popular Post Share Posted July 12, 2014 Ran across this article from Christianity today.... This quote in particular got to me: "Women who masturbate are often using it to self-soothe in response to negative emotions like feeling undesired, unwanted … I know women who struggle with masturbation because they fantasize about being wanted. If they were in a sexual relationship in the past (even if it didn't include intercourse), they were awakened to how their bodies can feel, and they masturbate to rekindle the feeling of being wanted by that man or by any man in general. It helps them fight the loneliness of not being in a relationship." It's so typical of the way the church views women as a whole. The idea that the only thing that can TRULY satisfy a woman is to be loved by her man, and that sex is only the means to that end for women. The idea that a woman would masturbate simply because it FEELS GOOD is not mentioned at all. I seriously think that the church's fascination/obsession with controlling people's sex lives is kind of sick. Something that is so integral to almost ever human being on the planet, they've managed to turn into a device for control, manipulation, guilt and shame. It pisses me off that so many people (including myself) have missed out on the positive role sex can play in your life if it's not enmeshed with all these stupid rules and guilt laden misconceptions. 12 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FreeThinkerNZ Posted July 12, 2014 Share Posted July 12, 2014 I agree, they try to control sexuality in general, but particularly women's sexuality. I noticed they refer to a sexual relationship as being with a man, as if that's the only way a woman might express her sexuality. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gall Posted July 12, 2014 Share Posted July 12, 2014 Ran across this article from Christianity today.... This quote in particular got to me: "Women who masturbate are often using it to self-soothe in response to negative emotions like feeling undesired, unwanted … I know women who struggle with masturbation because they fantasize about being wanted. If they were in a sexual relationship in the past (even if it didn't include intercourse), they were awakened to how their bodies can feel, and they masturbate to rekindle the feeling of being wanted by that man or by any man in general. It helps them fight the loneliness of not being in a relationship." It's so typical of the way the church views women as a whole. The idea that the only thing that can TRULY satisfy a woman is to be loved by her man, and that sex is only the means to that end for women. The idea that a woman would masturbate simply because it FEELS GOOD is not mentioned at all. I seriously think that the church's fascination/obsession with controlling people's sex lives is kind of sick. Something that is so integral to almost ever human being on the planet, they've managed to turn into a device for control, manipulation, guilt and shame. It pisses me off that so many people (including myself) have missed out on the positive role sex can play in your life if it's not enmeshed with all these stupid rules and guilt laden misconceptions. And for the most part all of these so called do right christians are sexual deviants. Just like their puritanical cousins of old. it seems to be fun for people of most faiths to call others out on sex while totally scromping like nasty rabits themselves. If you can't get yourself off why should you expect that someone else should be able to? Just as Tyler Durden says: Self improvement is masturbation... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neverlandrut Posted July 12, 2014 Share Posted July 12, 2014 Agreed! My teen years were a constant barrage of self imposed guilt over masturbation and "lust" due to what the bible and the church taught about holiness and sexual purity. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tollo Posted July 12, 2014 Share Posted July 12, 2014 I use it to help fall asleep mostly. Are the xtians also concerned about me removing my makeup and brushing my teeth in a biblical method cause that would be very Muslim of them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
♦ Fuego ♦ Posted July 12, 2014 Share Posted July 12, 2014 Take something normal that humans are driven towards, and make it "sin". Then sell them the cure (that never works because of their own monstrous "desire to sin"), and profit! Sell them books and CDs and video series about it, and remind them to tithe so that the curse of God isn't on them, and a few dozen other loopholes to string them along for decades. What a scam. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pawn Posted July 12, 2014 Share Posted July 12, 2014 Next they will be trying to tell us why why we listen to music, or get massages, or exercise. After all, these hedonistic pleasure-seeking activities are obviously just sinful behavior. A True Christian™ never has any pleasure, but suffers horribly for Christ, all their life. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blood Posted July 12, 2014 Share Posted July 12, 2014 Because men are ugly, and you orgasm without pregnancy? No, that can't be the reason. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
par4dcourse Posted July 12, 2014 Share Posted July 12, 2014 Um, uh, 'cause it feels good? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellinas Posted July 12, 2014 Share Posted July 12, 2014 I find the psychology of this article disturbing. The idea that women's sexuality needs to be singled out; that it is more of an issue, therefore, than men's... I would presume that the writer has knocked a few out (so to speak) over the years. So is this a guilt trip by proxy? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
♦ Fuego ♦ Posted July 12, 2014 Share Posted July 12, 2014 Next they will be trying to tell us why why we listen to music, or get massages, or exercise. After all, these hedonistic pleasure-seeking activities are obviously just sinful behavior. A True Christian™ never has any pleasure, but suffers horribly for Christ, all their life. Welcome to Puritanism. Been around for a long time. It's that nagging feeling that someone, somewhere, is having fun. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted July 12, 2014 Share Posted July 12, 2014 You would get better answers if this was in the protected forum. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midniterider Posted July 13, 2014 Share Posted July 13, 2014 Your fingers give a better orgasm than Jesus. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midniterider Posted July 13, 2014 Share Posted July 13, 2014 A True Christian™ never has any pleasure, but suffers horribly for Christ, all their life. Praise Jebus for all this horrible misery... :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rach Posted July 13, 2014 Share Posted July 13, 2014 "you don't need an outlet for sexual expression. You need more of God." - I quote this from Christian chastity advocate and author, Dannah Gresh, from her website Pure Freedom. I thought of this because Dannah's views were highly endorsed by a-mum's church and were taught to us young ladies. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted July 13, 2014 Share Posted July 13, 2014 Your fingers give a better orgasm than Jesus. That isn't what Jordan River said. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deidre Posted July 13, 2014 Share Posted July 13, 2014 If all us women weren't sitting around masturbating, we could all join forces and help prove that Noah's Ark really existed! Lol! More propaganda designed by sexually frustrated misogynists. Oh the irony. Why or how did such a notion ever start that an orgasm is an evil thing? The Christian church has always had huge issues with sexual pleasure. If a god exists, do we really think he cares if I finger myself tonight? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cianna200 Posted July 13, 2014 Share Posted July 13, 2014 The only thing, I agree with the church is that people take sex too seriously, Maybe Christians want people to stop being so sexually obsessed and start treating sex like a beautiful act between too people who are truly in love instead of like a game, tool etc, turning it from a loving connection to a disgusting dirty thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ToHellWithMe Posted July 13, 2014 Share Posted July 13, 2014 beautiful act between too people who are truly in loveSorry, but that sounds like just another form of obsession. To see it as a filthy sin is one way to dehumanize it, to put it on a pedestal is another. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deidre Posted July 13, 2014 Share Posted July 13, 2014 The only thing, I agree with the church is that people take sex too seriously, Maybe Christians want people to stop being so sexually obsessed and start treating sex like a beautiful act between too people who are truly in love instead of like a game, tool etc, turning it from a loving connection to a disgusting dirty thing. While I don't disagree with all you're saying, I don't believe sexuality is synonymous with love. It can be a way to express love but one doesn't need to be in a loving relationship in order to celebrate good sex. Not suggesting being promiscuous but I don't equate having sex outside of a loving relationship as a game or a tool for pleasure. The Christian church has caused many Christians and ex Christians to have an unhealthy view of sexuality, which actually ironically causes many to be obsessed with it. If you treat sex as a healthy biological act, chances are most people won't develop obsessions and hang ups over it. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bfuddled Posted July 13, 2014 Author Share Posted July 13, 2014 See, this is where I have NO idea what I think about things. I know that my ideas/feelings about sex are heavily influenced by my Christian upbringing, and that makes me want to just do/think the complete opposite of what I was told/taught. But there has to be a middle ground to things, which I haven't found yet. I find myself reacting to certain things and then having to check myself and rethink it because there's so many kneejerk reactions involved when you're dealing with sexual issues. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cianna200 Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 beautiful act between too people who are truly in loveSorry, but that sounds like just another form of obsession. To see it as a filthy sin is one way to dehumanize it, to put it on a pedestal is another. You're basically saying sex is not for people in love but for anyone who desires it similar to how a money monger worships money and chases after it constantly as if it were like a god? Sex lost it's beauty when it became a universal obsession like money and fame. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BendyLine Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 Why should they have to be? The only real requirement in my opinion should be consent. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ToHellWithMe Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 You're basically saying sex is not for people in love but for anyone who desires it similar to how a money monger worships money and chases after it constantly as if it were like a god? Sex lost it's beauty when it became a universal obsession like money and fame.I don't think I said a word about who sex is for, but why not! It's not like I'm interested in denying what you say now. Sex drive can be that sort of an obsession, fodder for fantasy and imaginary escape from a life without good prospects. Sex is for the one in love, but it can also be an interesting experiment. A lover might learn to use it, making it also a tool to control the weak-minded with. Finally, perhaps equivalent with the previous, sexual pleasure is evolution's tool to make the brain interested in having sex. Just for curiosity, I don't exactly see any beauty in sex, it just feels good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 All animals have sex. Humans have sex for the same reason cats, birds and fish have sex. I think it is a mistake to make assumptions about the chemistry going on in people and label which is the right kind and which is the wrong kind. Really informed consent is the thing that makes sex moral for humans. As long as everyone is able to understand (including they have reached the legal right of passage in age) and agrees it is all good. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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