Cianna200 Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 You're basically saying sex is not for people in love but for anyone who desires it similar to how a money monger worships money and chases after it constantly as if it were like a god? Sex lost it's beauty when it became a universal obsession like money and fame.I don't think I said a word about who sex is for, but why not! It's not like I'm interested in denying what you say now. Sex drive can be that sort of an obsession, fodder for fantasy and imaginary escape from a life without good prospects. Sex is for the one in love, but it can also be an interesting experiment. A lover might learn to use it, making it also a tool to control the weak-minded with. Finally, perhaps equivalent with the previous, sexual pleasure is evolution's tool to make the brain interested in having sex. Just for curiosity, I don't exactly see any beauty in sex, it just feels good. The fact is sex depresses me, love is much more important. Rape, pornography, sexual exploitation, sexual abuse, lust, sexual cruelty, sexual madness what more can I say. If sexual desire was kept under control, there would be no sexual destruction. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cianna200 Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 All animals have sex. Humans have sex for the same reason cats, birds and fish have sex. I think it is a mistake to make assumptions about the chemistry going on in people and label which is the right kind and which is the wrong kind. Really informed consent is the thing that makes sex moral for humans. As long as everyone is able to understand (including they have reached the legal right of passage in age) and agrees it is all good. Humans besides dolphins and bonobos are the only creatures that have sex for reasons other than reduction. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 All animals have sex. Humans have sex for the same reason cats, birds and fish have sex. I think it is a mistake to make assumptions about the chemistry going on in people and label which is the right kind and which is the wrong kind. Really informed consent is the thing that makes sex moral for humans. As long as everyone is able to understand (including they have reached the legal right of passage in age) and agrees it is all good. Humans besides dolphins and bonobos are the only creatures that have sex for reasons other than reduction. Never the less, animals have sex because of their instincts. That dolphins, bonobos and humans have evolved a different pattern does not change the fact that mating is driven by instinct. Lots of animals have evolved different ways of doing things. Life is diverse. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 The fact is sex depresses me, love is much more important. Rape, pornography, sexual exploitation, sexual abuse, lust, sexual cruelty, sexual madness what more can I say. If sexual desire was kept under control, there would be no sexual destruction. Rape is horrible. Pornography, that is regular pornography by adults for adults, is meaningless. Sexual exploitation is horrible. Sexual abuse is horrible. Lust is meaningless. I'm not sure what you mean by sexual cruelty but if you mean "kinky" then again when it is all consenting adults it is meaningless. Have a safe word and know when to use it. Madness? Trying to control sexual desire seems to make it worse. Repressing normal instincts has terrible side effects. Sex is just sex. It should be between consenting adults but as long as that condition is met what is the problem? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator TheRedneckProfessor Posted July 15, 2014 Super Moderator Share Posted July 15, 2014 If sexual desire was kept under control, there would be no sexual destruction. I'm afraid the recent scandals in the catholic church tend to suggest that this statement is false. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pawn Posted July 15, 2014 Share Posted July 15, 2014 The fact is sex depresses me, love is much more important. Rape, pornography, sexual exploitation, sexual abuse, lust, sexual cruelty, sexual madness what more can I say. If sexual desire was kept under control, there would be no sexual destruction. Wow, your statement is depressing to me. Very sad that you don't enjoy such an INTEGRAL PART OF LIFE ITSELF. It is like saying, "eating and breathing depresses me." I get ENORMOUS plaeasure and satisfaction out of sex. Love is a nice add-on, but not necessary to get my jollies off. I could bang a complete stranger and enjoy it immensely, and in fact I have! I have enjoyed porn for years too, but lately it bores me, I like to get it on with a real woman, just looking at them is...meh. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cianna200 Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 The fact is sex depresses me, love is much more important. Rape, pornography, sexual exploitation, sexual abuse, lust, sexual cruelty, sexual madness what more can I say. If sexual desire was kept under control, there would be no sexual destruction. Wow, your statement is depressing to me. Very sad that you don't enjoy such an INTEGRAL PART OF LIFE ITSELF. It is like saying, "eating and breathing depresses me." I get ENORMOUS plaeasure and satisfaction out of sex. Love is a nice add-on, but not necessary to get my jollies off. I could bang a complete stranger and enjoy it immensely, and in fact I have! I have enjoyed porn for years too, but lately it bores me, I like to get it on with a real woman, just looking at them is...meh. I found this comment mildly disturbing, sorry just cannot respond well. I just want a relationship based on true love, unfortunately, never will find it, so I will remain single, specially since sex is treated like a need and not a want. Not when sex is sought over love, the one thing that will bring peace and good in the world, the most important thing in life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xtify Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 Angela* sits down in my office. After a long conversation about love and God and concerns over family and employment after graduation, she falls silent. I sense she is weighing whether or not to continue the conversation. Then, in a burst of bravado, she plows through her reservations and blurts out: "I struggle with masturbation." Earlier this semester, Jasmine*, another student, asked me to mentor her. In our first meeting, she revealed that she has struggled with masturbation since junior high but has managed not to masturbate for two years. Why are they struggling so much with masturbation? It's not that hard to do 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pawn Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 specially since sex is treated like a need and not a want. Sex IS a need. If we didn't have sex....ummm, the species would go extinct in a few decades. It is basic biology. I'm sorry for your struggles with love, sex and relationships. I didn't mean to to be offensive. I wish you wellness, happiness and also... the Love you are seeking for. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FreeThinkerNZ Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 Every child has a right to adequate sexuality education, which should be provided in schools. A lot of kids miss out on this and grow up with misunderstandings about sexuality. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pawn Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 Why are they struggling so much with masturbation? It's not that hard to do 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midniterider Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 Jesus keeps promising to pleasure his ladies but never gets around to it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ToHellWithMe Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 Sex IS a need. If we didn't have sex....ummm, the species would go extinct in a few decades. It is basic biology. I'm sorry for your struggles with love, sex and relationships. I didn't mean to to be offensive. I wish you wellness, happiness and also... the Love you are seeking for.It's a need on the community level, but not on individual level. I'm rather certain you can have a fulfilled life even without children of your own and without ever getting physically intimate with another person. Acting well enough in accord with your sex drive might also be a need, who knows. When I say acting, I don't mean getting laid, but being honest to yourself about your desires and maybe even submitting to it to some degree in order to avoid having your sex drive go out of control. That degree probably varies according to one's conditioning etc. never will find it, so I will remain singleRemaining single is probably a choice you can't go much into wrong with most of the time, but I don't see a need to say 'never will find love'. Even if you're an asexual or smthn, there are quite a few others like that who still desire a romance. Also, there are many ways to express and feel love (whatever that is) or at least infatuation. There's even no need to get romantic about it oftentimes. For me personally, that is a slight turn-off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pawn Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 Ahhh heck, this is getting too intellectual. MORE TALK ABOUT FEMALE MASTURBATION PLEASE! EXPLICIT language preferred... oh wait, wrong sub-forum. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cianna200 Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 specially since sex is treated like a need and not a want. Sex IS a need. If we didn't have sex....ummm, the species would go extinct in a few decades. It is basic biology. I'm sorry for your struggles with love, sex and relationships. I didn't mean to to be offensive. I wish you wellness, happiness and also... the Love you are seeking for. Before we keep bringing more of us, we should work on building a better world, so that new human beings can be born into a beautiful world with very little violence, instead of coming into a world of suffering and despair. If sex really was a need (a requirement to live) the species would die out because of over population. When many have sex, they think about the enjoyment they get out of it, and never about the continuation of the human race. The main problem I face is abuse so thank you for your concern. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cianna200 Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 Sex IS a need. If we didn't have sex....ummm, the species would go extinct in a few decades. It is basic biology. I'm sorry for your struggles with love, sex and relationships. I didn't mean to to be offensive. I wish you wellness, happiness and also... the Love you are seeking for.It's a need on the community level, but not on individual level. I'm rather certain you can have a fulfilled life even without children of your own and without ever getting physically intimate with another person.Acting well enough in accord with your sex drive might also be a need, who knows. When I say acting, I don't mean getting laid, but being honest to yourself about your desires and maybe even submitting to it to some degree in order to avoid having your sex drive go out of control. That degree probably varies according to one's conditioning etc. never will find it, so I will remain singleRemaining single is probably a choice you can't go much into wrong with most of the time, but I don't see a need to say 'never will find love'. Even if you're an asexual or smthn, there are quite a few others like that who still desire a romance. Also, there are many ways to express and feel love (whatever that is) or at least infatuation. There's even no need to get romantic about it oftentimes. For me personally, that is a slight turn-off. Turn off (sex thing?) I do desire romance but am cynical that anyone knows what real love is all about, people get cheated on, treated like sex objects, etc. I personally do not want to put myself in these people's shoes so I will avoid those kinds of relationships. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 I'm afraid love is over rated. It doesn't live up to the stories and myths. To be sure it is wonderful to be in love - especially in the beginning when it is like being drunk all the time. But the euphoria doesn't last. 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jdog Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 To answer the title Horny Bored Relieve anxiety/tension Want to get to sleep Feels good Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FreeThinkerNZ Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 Ahhh heck, this is getting too intellectual. MORE TALK ABOUT FEMALE MASTURBATION PLEASE! EXPLICIT language preferred... oh wait, wrong sub-forum. Lol, I think I'm going to have to get access to that subforum now after all. *goes to PM a Mod* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duderonomy Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 Just to keep it all on topic. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neverlandrut Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 If sexual desire was kept under control, there would be no sexual destruction. I'm afraid the recent scandals in the catholic church tend to suggest that this statement is false.I think if you have enough human decency you will control yourself and not force yourself on anyone, or otherwise manipulate them. Me personally, I've never been able to enjoy sex if I knew my partner wasn't into it. For me, there has to be mutual desire. If she is going along with it just to make me happy, I'm greatful for the thought but I don't really want to have sex with her if she doesn't want to. That's just me. Yes, I think the Catholic Church's scandal shows what sexual repression can do. Everyone has a different level of sex drive, different likes and dislikes. Something that one likes may repulse another. There's no point in making value judgments about sexual acts. If someone is into things you're not into, then don't have sex with them. But if two people desire sex with each other in the same way, then power to them. Sexual acts themselves have no intrinsic moral weight one way or another as long as you respect the one you're with. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cianna200 Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 I'm afraid love is over rated. It doesn't live up to the stories and myths. To be sure it is wonderful to be in love - especially in the beginning when it is like being drunk all the time. But the euphoria doesn't last. Sex is overrated not love. When I say love, I mean love for everyone, this is the key to survival. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neverlandrut Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 Angela* sits down in my office. After a long conversation about love and God and concerns over family and employment after graduation, she falls silent. I sense she is weighing whether or not to continue the conversation. Then, in a burst of bravado, she plows through her reservations and blurts out: "I struggle with masturbation." Earlier this semester, Jasmine*, another student, asked me to mentor her. In our first meeting, she revealed that she has struggled with masturbation since junior high but has managed not to masturbate for two years. Why are they struggling so much with masturbation? It's not that hard to do My Christian upbringing made me feel incredibly guilty over masturbating for all of my teen years. It's so sad that these girl feel like it's a "struggle." Adolescents should feel free to explore their sexuality (with themselves), and taught that when they are ready to have sex one day that they should respect their partner's wishes regarding sex. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 I'm afraid love is over rated. It doesn't live up to the stories and myths. To be sure it is wonderful to be in love - especially in the beginning when it is like being drunk all the time. But the euphoria doesn't last. Sex is overrated not love. That has not been my experience. When I say love, I mean love for everyone, this is the key to survival. Sounds like Christian theology. Are you going to love the people who steal from you? Are you going to love those who molest children? Are you going to love rapists? There are some horrible people out there. The key to survival is protecting our family from those who would harm them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cianna200 Posted July 16, 2014 Share Posted July 16, 2014 I'm afraid love is over rated. It doesn't live up to the stories and myths. To be sure it is wonderful to be in love - especially in the beginning when it is like being drunk all the time. But the euphoria doesn't last. Sex is overrated not love. That has not been my experience. When I say love, I mean love for everyone, this is the key to survival. Sounds like Christian theology. Are you going to love the people who steal from you? Are you going to love those who molest children? Are you going to love rapists? There are some horrible people out there. The key to survival is protecting our family from those who would harm them. Christians teach conditional love, and yes you must love these people, as something terrible must have happened to them before they committed these horrible crimes, these people obviously were never taught the importance of love and kindness and the dangers of hatred and cruelty. It is like saying you will stop loving your child if they ever stole from you or committed a crime. If fear is your motivation to do things than you are not going get very far in life. Christians teach fear, they judge constantly, believe everyone is wicked unworthy sinners, and in the past, killed those who did not agree with them, they teach eternal hell for those who are different, and this is love? If everyone hated each other, the world would fall into intense darkness. Love will save this world, the people who have this love are saving the world, while those who bear hatred for anyone, is helping to destroy it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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