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Goodbye Jesus

What Makes @Christforums Special?


buffettphan

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This thread is to continue the questions/answers between @Christforums and @LogicalFallacy that were previously posted in the Rants subforum.

 

 

 

 

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Goodbye Jesus

@Christforums this deserves your attention. LF's question should be addressed. How do you know that your version is the correct one? What makes you so special?

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For the record, christforums has been notified of this thread.  

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And crickets.....

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God might not be talking to him today. Maybe God is talking to Jojo?

 

Perhaps neither of them? Or perhaps there simply isn't a reasonable answer as to how an outsider can distinguish between two competing dogmas claiming to be from the same God?

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The dogma of the church with the most potlucks is the True Way.

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This is like the second coming of Christ...

 

Still waiting 2000 years later.

 

#comingsoon

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I think he said he was moving. Might be relevant.

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13 minutes ago, wellnamed said:

I think he said he was moving. Might be relevant.

Might also be a lie.

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57 minutes ago, wellnamed said:

I think he said he was moving. Might be relevant.

 

Evidently he is....

 

https://www.christforums.com/forums/topic/20295-prayer-request-for-my-exodus-out-of-california/?tab=comments#comment-82204

 

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So he is. Christforums is exonerated until he gets his new home up and running then.

 

Maybe something like this happened with Jesus and we just didn't get the notice that he's moving homes and therefore think he's not coming?

 

Also he wanted prayer requests so I'm going to pray to the transcendent, immaterial, invisible Pink Unicorn. If the move goes well we will know that prayer to the great pink one works!

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9 hours ago, LogicalFallacy said:

If the move goes well we will know that prayer to the great pink one works!

Too late.  I already prayed to the Six Nippled One (Glorify Her Name) as soon as christfuckems announced he was moving.  If the move goes well, it is She who will receive the Glory for it.  All those who do not Glorify the Six Nippled One shall be devoured in everlasting digestive acids and gastric juices.

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20 minutes ago, TheRedneckProfessor said:

Too late.  I already prayed to the Six Nippled One (Glorify Her Name) as soon as christfuckems announced he was moving.  If the move goes well, it is She who will receive the Glory for it.  All those who do not Glorify the Six Nippled One shall be devoured in everlasting digestive acids and gastric juices.

 

You blasphemous heathen! You will float away forever on the fluffy pink clouds of the Pink Unicorns magnanimity to spend eternity pondering your vile ways! May the great horn poke thee! 

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1 hour ago, LogicalFallacy said:

 

You blasphemous heathen! You will float away forever on the fluffy pink clouds of the Pink Unicorns magnanimity to spend eternity pondering your vile ways! May the great horn poke thee! 

I won't offer similar threats; because I know your interpretation of the sacred text holds the pink unicorn to be divine.  In truth, though, a literal interpretation shows that the pink unicorn is just one of the Six Nippled One's (glorify her name) pets. 

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You two guys and your uh-piss-duh-mual-oh-geez! The pink unicorn, I'll have you know, is the "sacred phallus"; he whom penetrates the six nippled one. And it is she, whom, must lay in submission. In fact, in the presence of the pink unicorn she may not speak, unless spoken to, when celestial men are talking! Is it not written in your law; 'she whom remains coward down while men are speaking, shall remain glorious in the eyes of the almighty phallus?' And if it is written thus, why then shall it not be so among you?  

 

 

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1 hour ago, Joshpantera said:

Is it not written in your law; 'she whom remains coward down while men are speaking, shall remain glorious in the eyes of the almighty phallus?' And if it is written thus, why then shall it not be so among you?  

That's not canonical; it's part of the psuedo-PIG-rapha.

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5 hours ago, LogicalFallacy said:

May the great horn poke thee! 

 

6 hours ago, TheRedneckProfessor said:

....shall be devoured in everlasting digestive acids and gastric juices.

 

All you horny, nipple-obssessed people need to just get laid and call it a day, goodness me.

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1 hour ago, ag_NO_stic said:

 

 

All you horny, nipple-obssessed people need to just get laid and call it a day, goodness me.

 

INFIDEL!!!!!!

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2 hours ago, ag_NO_stic said:

All you horny, nipple-obssessed people need to just get laid and call it a day, goodness me.

It is blasphemous to reduce the Six Nippled One (glorify her name) to the level of a sex object.  It is like trying to reduce the crucifixion of jesus to the level of a boxing match.

 

 

 

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7 hours ago, TheRedneckProfessor said:

I won't offer similar threats; because I know your interpretation of the sacred text holds the pink unicorn to be divine.  In truth, though, a literal interpretation shows that the pink unicorn is just one of the Six Nippled One's (glorify her name) pets. 

 

Faithless cur! You already did threaten me with, and I quote, being "devoured in everlasting digestive acids and gastric juices".

 

You clearly have no understanding of the greatness of the Pink Unicorn, nor the ways in which the great Neigh is proclaimed through all the universe. We have no sacred texts. All the chosen of the Pink Unicorn have the truth thrust upon them by the great pink horn. You clearly have not been thrust by the great horn and had the Neigh revealed to you or you would know this. The Six Nippled One is just made up garbage from the fantasy of man. But it is not too late. You can change your heathen ways and open yourself up to be thrust by the great horn.

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19 minutes ago, LogicalFallacy said:

 

Faithless cur! You already did threaten me with, and I quote, being "devoured in everlasting digestive acids and gastric juices".

That was not a personal threat directed at you, you ignorant neigh-sayer.  It was merely an objective observation of what happens to those who put their *thrust in little horns.

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Six nipples would just be overwhelming. Choice paralysis. I can barely handle two.

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18 minutes ago, TheRedneckProfessor said:

That was not a personal threat directed at you, you ignorant neigh-sayer.  It was merely an objective observation of what happens to those who put their *thrust in little horns.

 

:lmao:

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26 minutes ago, TheRedneckProfessor said:

That was not a personal threat directed at you, you ignorant neigh-sayer.  It was merely an objective observation of what happens to those who put their *thrust in little horns.

 

It can't be objective because its a false belief! And how dare you demean the great horn! I take personal offense at this mocking the great horn by referring to it as "little". You are quite clearly anti unicornist. 

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1 hour ago, LogicalFallacy said:

It can't be objective because its a false belief! 

Do you even science, bro?

 

https://purrfectlove.net/common-questions-about-cat-nipples/

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