Get Your Prayers Answered Now!!!

[Asuryan]

P: "i'm desperate to have a miracle happen for your family."

 

 

 

Months have passed. We're still waiting. Our problems just haven't been fixed. Pug, we have a problem here: your prayers are able to get you a parking place, but aren't able to cure an ill person, or give money to someone who needs it? And you're okay with that?

 

You see, pug, a parking place is just coincidence. One of my friends says he has a surefire way to find a parking place, no matter how crowded is the place: he just starts whispering "Parking plaaace... oh parking place, where are youuu?". You know what? It works. It really seems to work. Of course sometimes 10 or 20 minutes and some good circling around in his car are needed, but he always finds it in the end.

 

But maybe it isn't because of the Magic Parking Place. Maybe it is because even if he hadn't said anything, the parking place would appear in front of his eyes just the same, maybe because statistically, someone was bound to come back to his car and just drive away heading home. Maybe the magic Parking Place Calling has just nothing to do with it. Maybe your god has nothing to do with it.

 

But you're scared, Pug. Every time we ask you "dude, where are our miracles?" you just spit out some lame excuses.

 

You say "You wouldn't believe anyway", who told you? I can assure you, certain things cannot be dismissed as coincidence, Pug. If a golden angel materializes in front of me, in my room, under my very eyes, placing one of his feather and 1 million Euros on my desktop, and then vanishing away, leaving the money and feather there, there's NO FUCKING WAY I could dismiss that as a coincidence. And your god is perfectly able to do that. If he can send down a rain of fire to destroy a city, he can send me an angel with money.

 

Stop making excuses, that will accomplish nothing - just as your prayers, it seems.

 

 

 

Now take a deep breath, think about what we, what I, wrote, and answer the question...

 

Could it be that god is not answering your prayers because he doesn't exist, pug?

If so, would you ever admit it to yourself?

[All Gods Fail]

[PS i'm on a Mac, can't use the quotation or bold or whatever functions.]

I'm on a Mac - why can't you use the quote functions? Or bold or whatever?

[Fweethawt]

[PS i'm on a Mac, can't use the quotation or bold or whatever functions.]

I'm on a Mac - why can't you use the quote functions? Or bold or whatever?

I think it's pretty obvious, AGF.

 

He's not indwelt with the Spirit of the Cute Bunny™.

[All Gods Fail]

I think it's pretty obvious, AGF.

 

He's not indwelt with the Spirit of the Cute Bunny.

 

Ahh... Truly, the CB works in mysterious ways.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Or, Pug is just a dope.

[Fweethawt]

Or, Pug is just a dope.

I'm willing to give him the benefit of doubt on this one.

 

 

 

 

*whispers*

 

I gotta be nice to him. I'm still waiting on his prayers to work.

[Dark Helmet]

[PS i'm on a Mac, can't use the quotation or bold or whatever functions.]

I'm on a Mac - why can't you use the quote functions? Or bold or whatever?

I think it's pretty obvious, AGF.

 

He's not indwelt with the Spirit of the Cute Bunny.

 

Nah, the power of the HTML (Holy Trippy Mother in Law) isn't in him. Infidel!!!

[pug]

testing for prayers

 

testing if i'm a dope

 

yep

 

dope

[pug]

Now take a deep breath, think about what we, what I, wrote, and answer the question...

 

Could it be that god is not answering your prayers because he doesn't exist, pug?

 

 

 

God has answered a lot of my prayers already (other than parking space). IF you think He does not exist or answer prayers.... duh... you deal with it dude.

 

Just can't seem to get them prayers to work for you folks. Could it be you all don't believe He exists?

 

AS for the infamous "ask and He'll give..." sure, but when He or you are ready. If that angel should appear tonight... don't keel over n die from a heart attack ~ you still have a million Euros to burn. That would be sweet irony!

 

Yes, i understand your arguments. AND i keep wanting to link them to be co-incidences. But, aah never mind. . . when it happens to you, then start believing... until then... i wish you a good life.

 

 

 

BTW this works when i use "safari" not "explorer"

[Lycorth]

Sorry, there's nothing stated or implied about the Xian god answering prayers when either he or we are "ready" (whatever that is supposed to mean). Just "ask and ye shall receive" - period.

 

[pug]

i'm sure your parents have said the exact same thing to you? Just ask and ye shall receive. Will your daddy kill you if you ask him nicely? Will he give you stones when you ask for bread?

 

Father knows best, right?

 

Of course He'll give it to you when He thinks it's right for you. But i can't answer for Him right?

 

It also helps if you think He actually exists even after 20 years of un-answered prayers. Eeeek! What little faith we have.

[Lycorth]

Don't obfuscate

 

If we ask for the healing of a loved one, there is no comparing that to stones or anything else that would be bad for us. It's a simple act of mercy.

 

If your god won't even heal loved ones, when he promises to answer any prayer we offer in his name, then clearly he is useless or cruel - or both.

 

[pug]

ob·fus·cate v

1. vti to make something obscure or unclear, especially by making it unnecessarily complicated

2. vt to make something dark or hard to see (archaic)

3. vt to make somebody confused (archaic)

 

Encarta® World English Dictionary

 

 

Wasn't i clear?

 

I'm saying (ok speculating) IF you asked for the healing of a loved one... for example, she will heal temporarily, ok prayer answered, but He knows she will suffer even MORE later would you still want that first prayer answered?

 

It's simply Father knows best. Have you heard of the expression "cruel to be kind"?

 

It's like that IMHO.

[Fweethawt]

It's also cruel to lie by telling someone that they can have "whatever asked for in prayer". Especially when it's the healing of a loved one. And especially especially 'specially when someone else gets their parking space that they prayed for.

 

It's okay though. It's much more amusing seeing you make up all sorts of excuses instead of coming to grips with the reality of the situation. With each of your posts, you make it much easier to see the similarities between a five year old child defending his imaginary friend and yourself.

 

Not only that, but don't forget, we're not the only ones who are reading these posts.

 

So, your silliness (absurdity is more like it) is causing other christians to do something that few of them are used to. And that is -- thinking.

[pug]

It's much more amusing seeing you make up all sorts of excuses instead of coming to grips with the reality of the situation.

 

Excuses? Get a grip.

 

I'm just saying it as it is, as it happens. You speak as if you are angry with God... i mean my imaginary friend. Why are you so upset if He, i mean my imaginary friend, does or does not do this or that to whomever He pleases? IMHO He knows best. You want to question me about Him?

 

Ummm, silly me, may i remind you that i'm not His press relations representative?! You want to ask why, you ask Him.

 

AND BTW it does not matter who is reading this.

[Fweethawt]

AND BTW it does not matter who is reading this.

Oh, yes it does.

 

btw, you just did it again.

 

Thank you.

[Lycorth]

I'm saying (ok speculating) IF you asked for the healing of a loved one... for example, she will heal temporarily, ok prayer answered, but He knows she will suffer even MORE later would you still want that first prayer answered?

 

It's simply Father knows best. Have you heard of the expression "cruel to be kind"?

 

It's like that IMHO.

 

Then you're positing a god who promises to answer prayers, yet won't because it's "cruel to be kind?"

 

Accordng to the Babble™, every time a loved one gets sick, we can ask in Jeezus'™ name for healing, and it will happen, without excuses or delay. So it shouldn't matter if a person gets sick or hurt again, because there's an escape hatch - promised right there in Scripchah.

 

[pug]

I'm saying (ok speculating) IF you asked for the healing of a loved one... for example, she will heal temporarily, ok prayer answered, but He knows she will suffer even MORE later would you still want that first prayer answered?

 

It's simply Father knows best. Have you heard of the expression "cruel to be kind"?

 

It's like that IMHO.

 

Then you're positing a god who promises to answer prayers, yet won't because it's "cruel to be kind?"

 

Accordng to the Babble, every time a loved one gets sick, we can ask in Jeezus' name for healing, and it will happen, without excuses or delay. So it shouldn't matter if a person gets sick or hurt again, because there's an escape hatch - promised right there in Scripchah.

 

 

IT'S not "cruel to be kind" the full phrase (and meaning) is: "you'll have to be cruel to be kind".

 

Yes, funny ain't it, ask and you'll be healed without delay, no excuses. Hasn't happened to some and yet millions still have faith.

 

Well, it has happened to a nephew we prayed for. He was in a coma after an operation. Although it didn't happen right away. Took a few weeks. He came out of the coma. No medication could help him, it was touch n go. So he was healed.

 

AND BTW i can't speak for God. You go talk to Him yourself.

[Fweethawt]

People come out of comas all of the time.

People find parking spaces all of the time, too.

[pug]

People come out of comas all of the time.

People find parking spaces all of the time, too.

 

People come out of Christianity all of the time.

People find Christ all of the time, too.

 

You can fool some people some of the time.

You can't fool all of the people all the time.

 

Why oh why do the people in my church still believe?

Why oh why do so many million people in the world still believe?

 

[very strong in south Korea and China]

 

You have (especially in Europe) great magnificent churches but they're all empty!(observed one foreign visitor) We use office and factory lots to be converted to churches and they're full.

[Fweethawt]

People come out of Christianity all of the time.

People find Christ all of the time, too.

 

You can fool some people some of the time.

You can't fool all of the people all the time.

 

Why oh why do the people in my church still believe?

Why oh why do so many million people in the world still believe?

Because of the reality that we all have different levels of ignorance. Common sense and reason are a rarity.

 

Yes, that's one answer for all of those questions.

[pug]

People come out of Christianity all of the time.

People find Christ all of the time, too.

 

You can fool some people some of the time.

You can't fool all of the people all the time.

 

Why oh why do the people in my church still believe?

Why oh why do so many million people in the world still believe?

Because of the reality that we all have different levels of ignorance. Common sense and reason are a rarity.

 

Yes, that's one answer for all of those questions.

 

You know, you are right!

 

*hits head*

 

Here is solid, conclusive proof that God will not answer prayers (thanks to the Grinch):

 

http://www.whywontgodhealamputees.com/god5.htm

 

 

So y'all no more requests for prayers. Thanks, at last we can put this miserable thread to rest. Glory.

[pug]

according to:

http://whywontgodhealamputees.com/

 

 

In other words, the data shows us that every "answered prayer" truly is a coincidence, nothing more. God doesn't "answer prayers" at all. The whole idea that "God answers prayers" is an illusion created by human imagination.

[Fweethawt]

according to:

http://whywontgodhealamputees.com/

 

 

In other words, the data shows us that every "answered prayer" truly is a coincidence, nothing more. God doesn't "answer prayers" at all. The whole idea that "God answers prayers" is an illusion created by human imagination.

You know, you are right!

 

*hits head*

 

Here is solid, conclusive proof that God will not answer prayers (thanks to the Grinch):

 

http://www.whywontgodhealamputees.com/god5.htm

[Lycorth]

IT'S not "cruel to be kind" the full phrase (and meaning) is: "you'll have to be cruel to be kind".

 

Yes, funny ain't it, ask and you'll be healed without delay, no excuses. Hasn't happened to some and yet millions still have faith.

 

Well, it has happened to a nephew we prayed for. He was in a coma after an operation. Although it didn't happen right away. Took a few weeks. He came out of the coma. No medication could help him, it was touch n go. So he was healed.

 

AND BTW i can't speak for God. You go talk to Him yourself.

 

 

Excuses, excuses.

 

Those millions have faith for many more reasons, most of them being cultural conditioning, fear of Hell™, and ignorance of other spiritual options. Xian brainwashing is very strong, and hard to root out - it's hard to get Yahooweh™ the busybody and his threats of eternal pain off your back, or dismantle the fuzzy bunny emotionalism that Xian preachers lace their Jeezus™ propaganda with. Faced with brainwashing techniques like that, it's a struggle for most people to dare to even think the Emperor has no clothes.

 

Can you prove prayer was what saved that nephew? I lost my brother and sister. My parents are Xians and were so when the losses happened. They prayed night and day for their little ones, and what did your asshole god give them? Corpses.

 

Yeah, I get a perfect example of your god's chimpanzee-like attention to the prayers of his believers when I go to the cemetery to lay flowers down at the graves of the siblings I deserved to have. Doesn't your god have enough angels to suck his dick that he needs to take people away from their families?

 

Or is it that this, combined with all the other instances Xians and Ex-xians can offer of unanwered prayers, suggests that your god is a fraud?

 

You're a Xian. Jeezus™ wants you to be his representative on earth. So, pony up with some answers or admit your god is a total fraud and Xianity is a sick and sorry-assed attempt at a religion

 

=

[Open_Minded]

Bump..... Bump.... Bump....

 

This thread needs resurrecting... we have a new Christian on board who feels he has a "fair success rate" with prayers....

 

 

Calling Michaelrosenweig .......

 

http://www.ex-christian.net/index.php?show...1659&st=860

 

You ask me why i coose to be a Christian. Really, I am a Jewish man who found the Messiah.

OK... . why do I believe. I believe because I have seen God in action, and have had Ulcerative Colitis and Rhematoid Arthritis Literally disappear from my body after being prayed for. Now this did not happen overnight, the healing I mean. There is documented proof of this in Atlantic City Hospital, in Atlantic City, New Jersey.

 

this took place in the mid-late 1970's to the mid 1980's, and I still have amazing health.

 

I also pray for people and have a fair success rate of healing taking place, and have prayed hurricanes and tornadoes away. A specific case is as such.

 

MichaelRosenweig... just for the record.... I've seen a few dramatic healings in my time as well. I am also Christian. But, dramatic healings are NOT confined to the Christian religion.

 

You may want to spend some time scanning this thread... be careful what you claim on this site. You will be held accountable.