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Goodbye Jesus

Get Your Prayers Answered Now!!!


Fweethawt

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I can't believe this thread is still going - amazin'

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It may be my needs are more urgent than yours.

Indeed!! Add to this "special". Welcome back yet once again from whence thou came, our little Puglette. :eek:

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I can't believe this thread is still going - amazin'

It's a miracle! It has been resurrected!

 

Bring out the zombies too. :)

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I can't believe this thread is still going - amazin'

 

Alice ... you're back...

 

NOW - MY prayers have been answered. :lmao:

 

Honestly - I missed you - welcome back!!!!! :)

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And Lady Feline is whining abt her loss funds?

Well, hey, when all you have to eat in your cupboard is some ramen, a half a bag of rice, and two cans of vegetables, while you recently had to shell out $200 for new glasses and almost as much for an emergency trip 400 miles to the west to say your last goodbye to your grandmother... which leaves you with all of $6 to your name... Yeah, you kind get a little bitchy. Especially when some prick promises that they will definitely help you get some financial security, and then backs out, turns around, and starts mocking the person they made the promise to.

 

:Wendywhatever::loser:

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Here Pug, use this one.

 

 

 

At least this one will make it look

like you're at least looking at our words.

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V,

 

To make DVD drive work, drive over ye local compooter shoppe. Get it fixed. Hand over cash. Now. No prayer necessary. Oh ok i shall pray that it can be fixed ~ or else more buckaroos and down time. Off you go. Now.

 

Jeezus™ says that whatever a true believer asks for in prayer will be given to him. No money is necessary.

 

Come on, show me the power of Jeezus™!

 

*taps his DVD drive button* I'm waiting...

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oh oh oh I have a request.

 

I want to meet Jake Gyllenhaal.

 

I also want to be a Hollywood actress, making $25 million per picture, hang out with celebrities, attend the latest hot parties, and live in ultimate wealth. Yeah!

 

Please god make my dreams come true!

 

:lmao:

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I can't believe this thread is still going - amazin'
We can't let it die down. :twitch:

 

We're still wating for results, you know? :shrug:

 

You - just - never - know. :Hmm:

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yeah you never know when god might part the red seas again!

 

:lmao:

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yeah you never know when god might part the red seas again!

:lmao:

You mean, there's more than one? :twitch:
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*shhh Fweester*

 

Its a secret

 

*looks around*

 

:lmao:

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Jeezus™ says that whatever a true believer asks for in prayer will be given to him. No money is necessary.

 

 

Key word is "you". You pray for it yourself. True believer or not He loves you anyway. About the no money bit - ummm, you ask for that too.

 

WTF you know the standard operating procedure, right? Go for it!

 

 

Lady Feline, you could give it a shot too. Your free will. (PS i did not make any promise the prayers will work! Fwee is da one who says i can do it. Help can; better you help yourself!)

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Key word is "you". You pray for it yourself. True believer or not He loves you anyway. About the no money bit - ummm, you ask for that too.

 

WTF you know the standard operating procedure, right? Go for it!

 

You bet your sweet pippy I know it, which is why I'm asking you. Show me the power of Jeezus™! I prayed and prayed for things that never came true. Problem is, there's no loophole for such things - the text is plain. Ask and ye shall receive.

 

Well, I asked a whole buncha times. Got squat. But maybe I wasn't a True Believer™. I bet you are, right? So, show me the power of Jeezus™! Ask him, in his name, to magically repair my DVD drive.

 

Surely he can do that, can't he? :unsure:

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Key word is "you". You pray for it yourself.

Well, logically, it must follow that, if a True Believer asks for something on someone else's behalf, it'll still be granted. Ergo, if you pray for something for someone else, then, by all accounts, GOD should give it to them, right? Because you asked for it, and therefore it must be recieved.

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Jeezus™ says that whatever a true believer asks for in prayer will be given to him. No money is necessary.

 

 

Key word is "you". You pray for it yourself. True believer or not He loves you anyway. About the no money bit - ummm, you ask for that too.

 

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!! :lmao:

 

Pug, you are pathetic!!!

 

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!! :lmao:

 

You're so bent on coming up with ANY reason that prayer doesn't work without tossing in the towel on your little world of make-believe, that you'll say anything to try and cover it up!!!

 

Just take another look at what you wrote!!!

 

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!! :lmao:

 

You said, "Key word is "you".

 

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!! :lmao:

 

And the word "YOU" wasn't even used in that sentence!!!!!

 

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!! :lmao:

 

Oh dear god you suck! :lmao:

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You're so bent on coming up with ANY reason that prayer doesn't work without tossing in the towel on your little world of make-believe, that you'll say anything to try and cover it up!!!

 

Yeah, tell me about it - any excuse that can be concieved of instead of just admitting Xian prayers don't work because there's no Jeezus™ to answer them.

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You're so bent on coming up with ANY reason that prayer doesn't work without tossing in the towel on your little world of make-believe, that you'll say anything to try and cover it up!!!

Yeah, tell me about it - any excuse that can be concieved of instead of just admitting Xian prayers don't work because there's no Jeezus™ to answer them.
I have a feeling his excuse for writing it that way is going to be something along the lines of, "Well, the actual verse says "you" or "ye" depending on which version of the bible you're reading.

 

So yeah, expect some more jumping around. :HaHa:

 

Either that, or another version of "We're not perfect, just forgiven :wub: "

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hey you all forgot where you are?!!

 

you've all left Him

 

even if your prayers were answered now you will scoff it off as co-incidence

 

so no need for me to cover up or explain

 

and pur-leessse don't tell me you left the faith cos He did not beam down a silver mercedes on your door step?

 

And Fwee you must be soooooo literal huh? Look, you all know this religion inside out ~ no instant grafication cos you faithfully prayed n waited and waited. No answer = no god. No proof = no god.

 

Hey you all forgot where you are? you've recovering here. you've left Him. still need prayers answered meh? Depend on yourself n yer fellow men luuuuu. No need a crutch or sky daddy now. Glory.

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I have a feeling his excuse for writing it that way is going to be something along the lines of, "Well, the actual verse says "you" or "ye" depending on which version of the bible you're reading.

 

So yeah, expect some more jumping around. :HaHa:

 

Either that, or another version of "We're not perfect, just forgiven :wub: "

 

Heh - oh yeah, I am expecting just that. Either more nit-picking about this translation versus that translation, trying to make up an excuse that places emphasis on me actually taking the DVD drive to a qualified professional and paying them for the work while still making it look like I'm asking and relying solely on Jeezus™ to accomplish the entire task, or that I need more faith and understanding.

 

I used to peddle the same lame excuses, so I'm waiting to hear them all spit back at me :jerkit:

 

Bottom line is that Jeezus™ says "ask and ye shall recieve" and none of the surrounding text implies that there are any conditions whatsoever to that promise, so he should just be able to pray and *bammo* my DVD drive works again. But he'd rather drop dead than just admit that :shrug:

 

hey you all forgot where you are?!!

 

you've all left Him

 

Blah blah blah...

 

Like I said, any and all excuses.

 

Puggo, we're asking you to do it. I know I'm not going to pray for a fixed DVD drive. I'm asking you, the True Believer™, to do it. And Jeezus™ said that anything you ask for in his name he will grant you. No implications of loopholes or exceptions in the surrounding text, but one clear point - Jeezus™ will always answer the prayers of True Believers™.

 

Excuses, excuses, excuses... :close:

 

And btw, not getting a Mercedes on one's doorstep is a perfectly valid reason to question and abandon Xianity, since, as I've been saying, Jeezus™ said he will give True Believers™ what they ask for, in his name. If he doesn't deliver the goods, then clearly his promise is bullshit. Jeezus™ is a liar or Jeezus™ doesn't exist - which is it?

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god...er pug, i'm still waiting for my hollywood career. please god...er pug, please!!! I'll do anything, go to church and worship thee twice every sunday, light a candle for thee, give up my hedonist ways, anything...

 

*

 

Just kidding pug. :)

 

That's the thing about xianity, you spend so much time praying, and waiting on god's will that you miss out on your life, you become a "ghost" and instead of going out there and doing things for yourself, you wait on something that will never come.

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And Fwee you must be soooooo literal huh? Look, you all know this religion inside out ~ no instant grafication cos you faithfully prayed n waited and waited. No answer = no god. No proof = no god.

 

Hey you all forgot where you are? you've recovering here. you've left Him. still need prayers answered meh? Depend on yourself n yer fellow men luuuuu. No need a crutch or sky daddy now. Glory.

But Pug, (hey, that sounds familiar. :scratch: ), don't forget now, before we "left him" we spent hours of days praying for the very things listed in this thread.

 

We KNOW that prayer is very much like sucking on a rock in hopes of getting a drink of water. Eventually, you're going to stop sucking on the rock. :shrug:

 

Not only that, but we figured that since you were getting a parking space every time that you prayed for one that maybe you might just be able to intercede on our behalf and maybe get at least one of our family members healed.

 

I know that the people that I asked you to pray for are BELIEVERS. So, in actuality, I'm asking you to pray for you brother and sister's in Christ. (my wife, sister in-law and dad)

 

They are fellow belivers, Pug! Surely someone with the Spirit of Christ™ within them, (like YOU for instance) can't just turn your back on them like that! Can you? I'm asking you to help out fellow Christian's, Pug, and you keep trying to put the blame on me... What's up with that?

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"ye shall receive" but the deadline was not stated. ha ha still got loop hole. and also not how you expected it to be done. your *wham* DVD cure is just yr own thoughts. He may have other ways to fix it for you.

 

Bahhh... this is all academic. you don't even believe there's a god let alone the christian god.

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"ye shall receive" but the deadline was not stated. ha ha still got loop hole. and also not how you expected it to be done. your *wham* DVD cure is just yr own thoughts. He may have other ways to fix it for you.

 

Bahhh... this is all academic. you don't even believe there's a god let alone the christian god.

 

Actually, you just stepped in your own doody again, since I do believe there is a god. Well, lots of them. I'm an Odinist, for the record :)

 

No, no deadline was stated, nor implied. That's the thing - the clear implication is that what we ask for, we get. Yes, *wham* - right now. No implication of waiting one minute - Jeezus™ said what we ask for in his name, we get. No bullshit, no games, no tricks, right? No reading of that verse or the verses surrounding it implies any sort of deadline - in fact, it gives anyone the clear implication of immediate gratification.

 

So, ask Jeezus™ to do it. Ask him to fix my DVD drive. According to the Babble™ he inspired his followers to write, it is obviously implied that we get what we ask for, right here and right now. And making us wait would only put us off and make us disbelieve, so why would Jeezus™ make us wait? Any god wishing to secure the loyalty of anyone who asks for things in prayer would just cut the crap and hook them up.

 

Fwee has even more serious requests than I do. Come on, surely Jeezus™ will at least grant his requests first. He can go before me in line, not as if he didn't ask before I did. It's cool with me :) Jeezus™ can at least do that much, right? Plus, doing that would certainly win over more believers, so again, why does Jeezus™ not cut the crap?

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