Overcame Faith Posted June 26, 2010 Share Posted June 26, 2010 Yes, go ahead and make the call, Confused. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
★ Citsonga ★ Posted June 27, 2010 Share Posted June 27, 2010 Holy shit, confused, I certainly hope you've called for help! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest confused idiot Posted June 27, 2010 Share Posted June 27, 2010 I haven't actually had a chance to call.... But I did go to see a movie, which got my mind off of it. I think I've backed out, I don't know if I should call or not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
★ Citsonga ★ Posted June 27, 2010 Share Posted June 27, 2010 If you are having suicidal thoughts, then you MUST call a help line. Don't back out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Overcame Faith Posted June 27, 2010 Share Posted June 27, 2010 I haven't actually had a chance to call.... But I did go to see a movie, which got my mind off of it. I think I've backed out, I don't know if I should call or not. Again, please make the call. If you're having suicidal thoughts, that is your mind's way of asking you to seek help. Listen to this important message and make the call, please. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest confused idiot Posted June 27, 2010 Share Posted June 27, 2010 Why bother. The only way things will get better is if I can erase this God of hate from my mind. Making that call won't do that. If this website didn't do the trick, nothing will. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Overcame Faith Posted June 27, 2010 Share Posted June 27, 2010 Taking your own life is not the answer. If it is even remotely possible that you will attempt such an action, then you need to protect your precious life so you can get the help that is available for you to get this "god of hate" out of your mind. You are of great worth and your life is worth saving. With professional help, you WILL get this out of your mind and will begin to be happy. You really will! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FiddlingAround Posted June 27, 2010 Share Posted June 27, 2010 Why bother. The only way things will get better is if I can erase this God of hate from my mind. Making that call won't do that. If this website didn't do the trick, nothing will. You are obiously intensely frustrated right now, CI, and you have my sympathies. There is nothing worse than the feeling that the choices you've made so far have tied you into a miserable future. In my experience, when I'm in that mood anything anyone says to the contrary only makes me feel worse. But I've also found that the mood doesn't last and when I come out I'm more open new information. So skip this post now if you need to, EXCEPT: Before you stop reading, I would like to encourage you again to make the call. Will it solve all your problems? Of course not. But it can help to give you coping skills and some tools for moving forward. This last post of yours sounds like you're definitely not okay right now, and the first thing to do is to get some help to ride it out. As for the long term advice: be a little more patient with yourself. Your original post of this thread was only in March. There's no reason to be hard on yourself because you haven't been able to shake a life-time of indoctrination in three months. It does take time, even for those of us who had an easier ride. Cut yourself some slack. Second, there's no reason to assume that if this board didn't help you nothing will. To my knowledge, none of us are trained psychiatrists. Even if we were, text is not the ideal medium for counseling. We can't pick up on tone of voice or body language, and we only get the most polished and careful version of your thoughts. A counselor in person, or even on the phone, will be able to help you much more than anyone here. The Ex-C is a great medium for support, but is no substitute for face-to-face interaction. To close, I will strongly urge you one more time: Make the call. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RankStranger Posted June 27, 2010 Share Posted June 27, 2010 Don't quit on us now, CI. You're about to hit that big round number of 70 pages. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Valk0010 Posted June 27, 2010 Share Posted June 27, 2010 It takes a lot of strength to do what you do. Your half way home on this stuff, now you got to dig down and hit the finish line. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest confused idiot Posted June 27, 2010 Share Posted June 27, 2010 Taking your own life is not the answer. If it is even remotely possible that you will attempt such an action, then you need to protect your precious life so you can get the help that is available for you to get this "god of hate" out of your mind. You are of great worth and your life is worth saving. With professional help, you WILL get this out of your mind and will begin to be happy. You really will! I'm not gonna take my life. All I'm saying is, as more time goes by, that seems like the one and only way out of this. But if Christianity is the truth, then that means hell is real, and if hell is real, that means death is no way out at all. So if Christianity is true.... there's not one way out. You are obiously intensely frustrated right now, CI, and you have my sympathies. There is nothing worse than the feeling that the choices you've made so far have tied you into a miserable future. In my experience, when I'm in that mood anything anyone says to the contrary only makes me feel worse. But I've also found that the mood doesn't last and when I come out I'm more open new information. So skip this post now if you need to, EXCEPT: Before you stop reading, I would like to encourage you again to make the call. Will it solve all your problems? Of course not. But it can help to give you coping skills and some tools for moving forward. This last post of yours sounds like you're definitely not okay right now, and the first thing to do is to get some help to ride it out. As for the long term advice: be a little more patient with yourself. Your original post of this thread was only in March. There's no reason to be hard on yourself because you haven't been able to shake a life-time of indoctrination in three months. It does take time, even for those of us who had an easier ride. Cut yourself some slack. Second, there's no reason to assume that if this board didn't help you nothing will. To my knowledge, none of us are trained psychiatrists. Even if we were, text is not the ideal medium for counseling. We can't pick up on tone of voice or body language, and we only get the most polished and careful version of your thoughts. A counselor in person, or even on the phone, will be able to help you much more than anyone here. The Ex-C is a great medium for support, but is no substitute for face-to-face interaction. To close, I will strongly urge you one more time: Make the call. I'll call a crisis line just to see how it goes, but I'm not gonna call an actual suicide hotline, because if I did I might be getting in the way of a caller who actually was going to kill theirself. Don't quit on us now, CI. You're about to hit that big round number of 70 pages. That's a good thing? It takes a lot of strength to do what you do. Your half way home on this stuff, now you got to dig down and hit the finish line. I'm not doing a very good job at it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Valk0010 Posted June 27, 2010 Share Posted June 27, 2010 Do you have any real questions to ask? EDIT: I am not trying to be insulting, but I am just asking do you have any more nonemotional questions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Overcame Faith Posted June 27, 2010 Share Posted June 27, 2010 I'm glad your not going to take your life and I like your idea of calling a crisis hotline. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest confused idiot Posted June 28, 2010 Share Posted June 28, 2010 Do you have any real questions to ask? EDIT: I am not trying to be insulting, but I am just asking do you have any more nonemotional questions. None worth asking. No matter what questions are answered, they'll all be shot down by these fucking apologetics that I've absorbed. So fuck it, there ain't no damn solution.... In my mind, this religion is as true as it gets, and there's no hiding from it.... GOD DAMN IT ALL. There's no fucking way out. Not through Jesus, not through my own path, not through nothing..... [insert cuss word of your choosing here] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest confused idiot Posted June 28, 2010 Share Posted June 28, 2010 I remembered something tonight. A long time ago, as a struggling Christian, I prayed to God that if I came to the point of deconversion, he wouldn't let me go through with it. I'm wondering if that's why I'm having such a hard time.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Valk0010 Posted June 28, 2010 Share Posted June 28, 2010 I remembered something tonight. A long time ago, as a struggling Christian, I prayed to God that if I came to the point of deconversion, he wouldn't let me go through with it. I'm wondering if that's why I'm having such a hard time.... How about this Pray to god, to help you with your struggles and help you with doubt. A friend on mine on this site, did this once: (She) Pray(ed) to god. (She) Take(n) a brick, and pray(ed) to a brick. She found the responses to be the same. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Valk0010 Posted June 28, 2010 Share Posted June 28, 2010 Do you have any real questions to ask? EDIT: I am not trying to be insulting, but I am just asking do you have any more nonemotional questions. None worth asking. No matter what questions are answered, they'll all be shot down by these fucking apologetics that I've absorbed. So fuck it, there ain't no damn solution.... In my mind, this religion is as true as it gets, and there's no hiding from it.... GOD DAMN IT ALL. There's no fucking way out. Not through Jesus, not through my own path, not through nothing..... [insert cuss word of your choosing here] Grow the fuck up, quite being led around by spiritual whims and try you best to use your fucking head and be unbiased. And think man think. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Valk0010 Posted June 28, 2010 Share Posted June 28, 2010 sorry double post Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest confused idiot Posted June 28, 2010 Share Posted June 28, 2010 Do you have any real questions to ask? EDIT: I am not trying to be insulting, but I am just asking do you have any more nonemotional questions. None worth asking. No matter what questions are answered, they'll all be shot down by these fucking apologetics that I've absorbed. So fuck it, there ain't no damn solution.... In my mind, this religion is as true as it gets, and there's no hiding from it.... GOD DAMN IT ALL. There's no fucking way out. Not through Jesus, not through my own path, not through nothing..... [insert cuss word of your choosing here] Grow the fuck up, quite being led around by spiritual whims and try you best to use your fucking head and be unbiased. And think man think. How? All of a sudden just stop the thoughts that a lifetime of indoctrination has brought? Just stop? That's it? Yeah right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Valk0010 Posted June 28, 2010 Share Posted June 28, 2010 Do you have any real questions to ask? EDIT: I am not trying to be insulting, but I am just asking do you have any more nonemotional questions. None worth asking. No matter what questions are answered, they'll all be shot down by these fucking apologetics that I've absorbed. So fuck it, there ain't no damn solution.... In my mind, this religion is as true as it gets, and there's no hiding from it.... GOD DAMN IT ALL. There's no fucking way out. Not through Jesus, not through my own path, not through nothing..... [insert cuss word of your choosing here] Grow the fuck up, quite being led around by spiritual whims and try you best to use your fucking head and be unbiased. And think man think. How? All of a sudden just stop the thoughts that a lifetime of indoctrination has brought? Just stop? That's it? Yeah right. I just said try really hard Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest confused idiot Posted June 28, 2010 Share Posted June 28, 2010 Do you have any real questions to ask? EDIT: I am not trying to be insulting, but I am just asking do you have any more nonemotional questions. None worth asking. No matter what questions are answered, they'll all be shot down by these fucking apologetics that I've absorbed. So fuck it, there ain't no damn solution.... In my mind, this religion is as true as it gets, and there's no hiding from it.... GOD DAMN IT ALL. There's no fucking way out. Not through Jesus, not through my own path, not through nothing..... [insert cuss word of your choosing here] Grow the fuck up, quite being led around by spiritual whims and try you best to use your fucking head and be unbiased. And think man think. How? All of a sudden just stop the thoughts that a lifetime of indoctrination has brought? Just stop? That's it? Yeah right. I just said try really hard Borrowing a quote from a little green dude, do or do not, there is no try. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Valk0010 Posted June 28, 2010 Share Posted June 28, 2010 Do you have any real questions to ask? EDIT: I am not trying to be insulting, but I am just asking do you have any more nonemotional questions. None worth asking. No matter what questions are answered, they'll all be shot down by these fucking apologetics that I've absorbed. So fuck it, there ain't no damn solution.... In my mind, this religion is as true as it gets, and there's no hiding from it.... GOD DAMN IT ALL. There's no fucking way out. Not through Jesus, not through my own path, not through nothing..... [insert cuss word of your choosing here] Grow the fuck up, quite being led around by spiritual whims and try you best to use your fucking head and be unbiased. And think man think. How? All of a sudden just stop the thoughts that a lifetime of indoctrination has brought? Just stop? That's it? Yeah right. I just said try really hard Borrowing a quote from a little green dude, do or do not, there is no try. Well if you believe that, then i should just give up right now. That is also a false dichotomy, in this instance. You can try and then improve. That makes sense seeing as there is not going to be overnight change. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest confused idiot Posted June 28, 2010 Share Posted June 28, 2010 Well if you believe that, then i should just give up right now. That is also a false dichotomy, in this instance. You can try and then improve. That makes sense seeing as there is not going to be overnight change. I've been trying for a long time, that's not good enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Valk0010 Posted June 28, 2010 Share Posted June 28, 2010 Well if you believe that, then i should just give up right now. That is also a false dichotomy, in this instance. You can try and then improve. That makes sense seeing as there is not going to be overnight change. I've been trying for a long time, that's not good enough. Keep going, keep trying, its a matter of time, not the nature of the issue. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Valk0010 Posted June 28, 2010 Share Posted June 28, 2010 Is it just brainwashing that keeps yeah bugged up, or is it other things. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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