electech98 Posted June 3, 2012 Author Share Posted June 3, 2012 Honestly, he can send me as many books as he wants. It's his money. If I feel that it's getting too much, I always have the option of sending him some books of my own. If I respond by sending him back his book with notes attached, it invalidates my boundaries set in my email and will encourage him to engage full-bore in debate. That is NOT something I'm interested in. At least that's how I feel for now. The main issue I have with the book, that maybe my FIL doesn't understand at this point, is the the author of the book clearly has an agenda of presenting his side from an obviously predetermined agenda of biblical thinking, as stated in his reply to a certain atheist review of his book: "However, since the whole purpose of my book was to present a biblical world-view, a clash here is inevitable with anyone for whom the Bible is a stumblingblock (theists and atheists alike!)." (http://www.amazon.com/review/RQLDFINO2V10R/ref=cm_cr_rev_detmd_pl?ie=UTF8&asin=0852347073&cdForum=Fx3SVMF8MSBX0X&cdMsgID=Mx18M29DK4KV9XD&cdMsgNo=2&cdPage=1&cdSort=oldest&cdThread=Tx3CEO6Y9S1601W&store=books#Mx18M29DK4KV9XD) I don't think my FIL understands quite yet that my rejection of Christianity has mainly to do with examination of its documents, doctrines, history, etc., and not based on acceptance of evolution. Millions of Christians accept evolution and still are able to consider themselves Christians, by taking a much less literalist stance on the Bible. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midniterider Posted June 3, 2012 Share Posted June 3, 2012 Honestly, he can send me as many books as he wants. It's his money. If I feel that it's getting too much, I always have the option of sending him some books of my own. If I respond by sending him back his book with notes attached, it invalidates my boundaries set in my email and will encourage him to engage full-bore in debate. That is NOT something I'm interested in. At least that's how I feel for now. The main issue I have with the book, that maybe my FIL doesn't understand at this point, is the the author of the book clearly has an agenda of presenting his side from an obviously predetermined agenda of biblical thinking, as stated in his reply to a certain atheist review of his book: "However, since the whole purpose of my book was to present a biblical world-view, a clash here is inevitable with anyone for whom the Bible is a stumblingblock (theists and atheists alike!)." (http://www.amazon.co...Mx18M29DK4KV9XD) I don't think my FIL understands quite yet that my rejection of Christianity has mainly to do with examination of its documents, doctrines, history, etc., and not based on acceptance of evolution. Millions of Christians accept evolution and still are able to consider themselves Christians, by taking a much less literalist stance on the Bible. I think I'd just try to resell it. No sense in having something around the house you dont want. Dont have to tell him unless he asks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darklady Posted June 3, 2012 Share Posted June 3, 2012 seriously, I would email back and say, please don't send me books. Its just plain frigging rude. Kind of thing my ex mother in law would do .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caretaker Posted June 3, 2012 Share Posted June 3, 2012 Just send him the book back and suggest he gives it to someone that cares about invisibleimaginary gods. Fixed that for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peace Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 I agree that reading and critiquing the book would be invalidating your own boundary. I have a clear boundary with my MIL that I will not receive or read any materials she gives me (on ANYTHING) because she has given us so many offensive books and pamphlets on any number of subjects. Unfortunately she doesn't see that continuing to do so degrades our relationship even further so she continues to send/give them and I donate or throw them out immediately. I honestly do not understand what these people are thinking. I don't want to talk to you about it but you think I'm going to waste hours of my life reading a book you sent me that just says everything you wanted to say yourself? Boo hiss. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator TrueFreedom Posted June 5, 2012 Moderator Share Posted June 5, 2012 Loved ones feel obligated to save us. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Akheia Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 Reminds me. My aunt sent me a weird book a year or so ago for Christmas about how to be a good Catholic woman/wife/mother. I ran across it today while hunting for PJ O'Rourke books in my library. I don't have the foggiest notion why she sent it; she's a rather geriatric convent-living nun, but not especially hardcore about it (she drinks beer and plays fantasy football--BEST. NUN. EVER. She's my favorite relative), and we've had a quiet detente about religion ever since I became a fundamentalist Protestant at 17. She's never said a single word about my spirituality. So I'm mystified about why she thought I'd welcome a book about being a good Catholic woman. I wouldn't dream of marking it up and sending it back to her, since I suspect this was just a regifting situation, but context is everything, isn't it? But I reserve the right to quote and scan it for amusement purposes, much like I already have elsewhere about the "My Little Heart Prays" uber-Catholic confirmation book my mother got as a young child. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thought2Much Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 Reminds me. My aunt sent me a weird book a year or so ago for Christmas about how to be a good Catholic woman/wife/mother. I ran across it today while hunting for PJ O'Rourke books in my library. I don't have the foggiest notion why she sent it; she's a rather geriatric convent-living nun, but not especially hardcore about it (she drinks beer and plays fantasy football--BEST. NUN. EVER. She's my favorite relative), and we've had a quiet detente about religion ever since I became a fundamentalist Protestant at 17. She's never said a single word about my spirituality. So I'm mystified about why she thought I'd welcome a book about being a good Catholic woman. I wouldn't dream of marking it up and sending it back to her, since I suspect this was just a regifting situation, but context is everything, isn't it? But I reserve the right to quote and scan it for amusement purposes, much like I already have elsewhere about the "My Little Heart Prays" uber-Catholic confirmation book my mother got as a young child. Akheia, if she's as cool as you say, maybe she sent it sarcastically for some reason? Just a thought. Electech, if you do critique the book and send it back, make sure that the critique is written across at least 50 or so handwritten pages, with lots and lots of footnotes and references refuting every point of the book. Make it an absolutely overwhelming task for anyone to respond to it. I think it's best to just ignore it, though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
electech98 Posted June 5, 2012 Author Share Posted June 5, 2012 Reminds me. My aunt sent me a weird book a year or so ago for Christmas about how to be a good Catholic woman/wife/mother. I ran across it today while hunting for PJ O'Rourke books in my library. I don't have the foggiest notion why she sent it; she's a rather geriatric convent-living nun, but not especially hardcore about it (she drinks beer and plays fantasy football--BEST. NUN. EVER. She's my favorite relative), and we've had a quiet detente about religion ever since I became a fundamentalist Protestant at 17. She's never said a single word about my spirituality. So I'm mystified about why she thought I'd welcome a book about being a good Catholic woman. I wouldn't dream of marking it up and sending it back to her, since I suspect this was just a regifting situation, but context is everything, isn't it? But I reserve the right to quote and scan it for amusement purposes, much like I already have elsewhere about the "My Little Heart Prays" uber-Catholic confirmation book my mother got as a young child. Akheia, if she's as cool as you say, maybe she sent it sarcastically for some reason? Just a thought. Electech, if you do critique the book and send it back, make sure that the critique is written across at least 50 or so handwritten pages, with lots and lots of footnotes and references refuting every point of the book. Make it an absolutely overwhelming task for anyone to respond to it. I think it's best to just ignore it, though. I'm reading through it (I want to be a good skeptic, and not automatically dismiss an argument presented to me outright without considering it first), but will not respond to it. I think it makes my wife a bit happier to know I am reading through it instead of totally disregarding it. But the boundaries still stand, and that means no conversation with him on religion or faith. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FeelHappy Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 I have my own standing agreement with theists family, if they'll read a book I recommend then I'll read one they recommend, its a give and take situation. I'd think that if most christians read 1 science/biblical problems book for every 1 christian book then we'd have very very few fundi christians in the world (but maybe a lot more liberal christians rather than non-theists). 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcdaddy Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 Reminds me. My aunt sent me a weird book a year or so ago for Christmas about how to be a good Catholic woman/wife/mother. I ran across it today while hunting for PJ O'Rourke books in my library. I don't have the foggiest notion why she sent it; she's a rather geriatric convent-living nun, but not especially hardcore about it (she drinks beer and plays fantasy football--BEST. NUN. EVER. She's my favorite relative), and we've had a quiet detente about religion ever since I became a fundamentalist Protestant at 17. She's never said a single word about my spirituality. So I'm mystified about why she thought I'd welcome a book about being a good Catholic woman. I wouldn't dream of marking it up and sending it back to her, since I suspect this was just a regifting situation, but context is everything, isn't it? But I reserve the right to quote and scan it for amusement purposes, much like I already have elsewhere about the "My Little Heart Prays" uber-Catholic confirmation book my mother got as a young child. Akheia, if she's as cool as you say, maybe she sent it sarcastically for some reason? Just a thought. Electech, if you do critique the book and send it back, make sure that the critique is written across at least 50 or so handwritten pages, with lots and lots of footnotes and references refuting every point of the book. Make it an absolutely overwhelming task for anyone to respond to it. I think it's best to just ignore it, though. I'm reading through it (I want to be a good skeptic, and not automatically dismiss an argument presented to me outright without considering it first), but will not respond to it. I think it makes my wife a bit happier to know I am reading through it instead of totally disregarding it. But the boundaries still stand, and that means no conversation with him on religion or faith. Hopefully she doesn't tell him you read it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcdaddy Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 I have my own standing agreement with theists family, if they'll read a book I recommend then I'll read one they recommend, its a give and take situation. I'd think that if most christians read 1 science/biblical problems book for every 1 christian book then we'd have very very few fundi christians in the world (but maybe a lot more liberal christians rather than non-theists). This x 1000 ( except I dont think you'd have many liberal xians tho) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ConureDelSol Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 Read it like the good skeptic you are. Then sell it. FREE MONEY! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
electech98 Posted June 5, 2012 Author Share Posted June 5, 2012 Read it like the good skeptic you are. Then sell it. FREE MONEY! W00t! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Akheia Posted June 6, 2012 Share Posted June 6, 2012 Reminds me. My aunt sent me a weird book a year or so ago for Christmas about how to be a good Catholic woman/wife/mother. I ran across it today while hunting for PJ O'Rourke books in my library. I don't have the foggiest notion why she sent it; she's a rather geriatric convent-living nun, but not especially hardcore about it (she drinks beer and plays fantasy football--BEST. NUN. EVER. She's my favorite relative), and we've had a quiet detente about religion ever since I became a fundamentalist Protestant at 17. She's never said a single word about my spirituality. So I'm mystified about why she thought I'd welcome a book about being a good Catholic woman. I wouldn't dream of marking it up and sending it back to her, since I suspect this was just a regifting situation, but context is everything, isn't it? But I reserve the right to quote and scan it for amusement purposes, much like I already have elsewhere about the "My Little Heart Prays" uber-Catholic confirmation book my mother got as a young child. Akheia, if she's as cool as you say, maybe she sent it sarcastically for some reason? Just a thought. Electech, if you do critique the book and send it back, make sure that the critique is written across at least 50 or so handwritten pages, with lots and lots of footnotes and references refuting every point of the book. Make it an absolutely overwhelming task for anyone to respond to it. I think it's best to just ignore it, though. I'm reading through it (I want to be a good skeptic, and not automatically dismiss an argument presented to me outright without considering it first), but will not respond to it. I think it makes my wife a bit happier to know I am reading through it instead of totally disregarding it. But the boundaries still stand, and that means no conversation with him on religion or faith. I think you're doing the right thing all the way around, FWIW. And T2M, I wish I knew. She's pretty Catholic, but not very evangelical, if that makes sense. She'd probably be very happy if I DID re-convert; when I was a girl, we were especially close, and for a while folks thought I'd follow in her footsteps and become a nun. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShaneL Posted June 6, 2012 Share Posted June 6, 2012 When the seeds of doubt are sewn in a critical thinking mind, that is when education and knowledge negates faith. Faith can only exist when it's emotionally appealed and has an intellectually dishonest environment. Starve faith and feed education and knowledge. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
electech98 Posted June 28, 2012 Author Share Posted June 28, 2012 LOL, I think the FIL is starting to become a little restless at my silence. From yesterday: Dear Jeremy I continue to pray for you because of my concern for your spiritual welfare, given your state of mind. Hopefully the reading material I've sent you have or are actually reading. I'd be interested in any impact it's having on you. I myself have in spurts read Herman Banick's 3 volumes entitled "Reformed Dogmatics" for my own edification, and as I have just recently been reading from His first volume, "Prolegomena" I thought of you and what a good read it would be for you who like to delve into intellectual discussion. So I would recommend it to you, but you'll have to get it yourself. I ought let you know that I am praying that the Lord give you no peace in your life until your once again embrace the faith you did profess. In Christ Dad Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vigile Posted June 28, 2012 Share Posted June 28, 2012 I ought let you know that I am praying that the Lord give you no peace in your life untilyour once again embrace the faith you did profess. "I wish bad things to happen to you until you come around to my way of thinking" Classy. 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Valk0010 Posted June 28, 2012 Share Posted June 28, 2012 LOL, I think the FIL is starting to become a little restless at my silence. From yesterday: Dear Jeremy I continue to pray for you because of my concern for your spiritual welfare, given your state of mind. Hopefully the reading material I've sent you have or are actually reading. I'd be interested in any impact it's having on you. I myself have in spurts read Herman Banick's 3 volumes entitled "Reformed Dogmatics" for my own edification, and as I have just recently been reading from His first volume, "Prolegomena" I thought of you and what a good read it would be for you who like to delve into intellectual discussion. So I would recommend it to you, but you'll have to get it yourself. I ought let you know that I am praying that the Lord give you no peace in your life until your once again embrace the faith you did profess. In Christ Dad Just like Jeebus. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcdaddy Posted June 28, 2012 Share Posted June 28, 2012 Still a douche. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Akheia Posted June 28, 2012 Share Posted June 28, 2012 No offense, but your FIL is a dick. First he tells you to justify your existence to him AGAIN by insisting you read his stupid book and then buy and read another book he thinks you should read to talk you out of your already-much-considered position, then tells you that he's asking his magic sky daddy to beat you up to make you come around, because if illogical arguments don't work and there's no evidence whatsoever that your claims are valid, then why, a good whippin' will do the trick. (Hint: don't let this asshat babysit.) Violence and ill-will are never far from the fundie's hands in the toolbox of witnessing, are they? 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marmot Posted June 28, 2012 Share Posted June 28, 2012 I ought let you know that I am praying that the Lord give you no peace in your life untilyour once again embrace the faith you did profess. "I wish bad things to happen to you until you come around to my way of thinking" Classy. Exactly what I thought. This guy puts conditional love in a whole new frame of meaning. Major ass-hat here. I really hope your wife comes around with you on this one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcdaddy Posted June 28, 2012 Share Posted June 28, 2012 He's starting to inch dangerously close to a FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUU 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LivingLife Posted June 28, 2012 Share Posted June 28, 2012 I ought let you know that I am praying that the Lord give you no peace in your life until your once again embrace the faith you did profess. "I wish bad things to happen to you until you come around to my way of thinking" Classy. Exactly what I thought. This guy puts conditional love in a whole new frame of meaning. Major ass-hat here. I really hope your wife comes around with you on this one. Agreed with all. Fortunately we realists know that prayer does not work and there is no one behind the curtain. Still it is a douche comment and deserves all the ridicule it gets. Dear dad Please stop praying, I am feeling suicidal. If I off myself, you will have to care for the kids... Your distressed SIL Or something like that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FeelHappy Posted June 28, 2012 Share Posted June 28, 2012 Haha did you send HIM a reading list yet? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts