Things Fundies Say On Facebook

[Cryptic]

oo, i forgot to mention that she also said that because of my reply i had 'serious issues'.

 

yep.

 

I had a similar issue. My wife was asking for help in finding a babysitter while she goes to school and I'm at work. One of her friends said "Make sure the person you hire is Christian, that way you know they have morals."

 

I sat there for a few minutes deciding if I should reply like I usually do. I let that one go unfortunately; as easy as that statement was to destroy. I told her about it with a smile and she just laughed and said, "yeah, it would have started a fight." Sometimes we can both laugh at dumb fundie FB posts.

[marmot]

The rain is beating down so faithfully, But My love is more faithful, you will see. The winds will show no mercy for your face, But your heart is safe, secure inside My grace. Hold on now it won't be too long.

 

Posted today from a friend. It's raining. WTF?

[Positivist]

The rain is beating down so faithfully, But My love is more faithful, you will see. The winds will show no mercy for your face, But your heart is safe, secure inside My grace. Hold on now it won't be too long.

 

Posted today from a friend. It's raining. WTF?

Ugh. Puke. I'm trying to think of a counter post.

[Legion]

yeah

[Inqui]

The rain is beating down so faithfully, But My love is more faithful, you will see. The winds will show no mercy for your face, But your heart is safe, secure inside My grace. Hold on now it won't be too long.

 

Posted today from a friend. It's raining. WTF?

Ugh. Puke. I'm trying to think of a counter post.

I'm still trying to get my head around what it's saying! Good luck with a counter, you must have a much stronger brain than I.

[bornnormal]

The rain is beating down so faithfully, But My love is more faithful, you will see. The winds will show no mercy for your face, But your heart is safe, secure inside My grace. Hold on now it won't be too long.

 

Posted today from a friend. It's raining. WTF?

Ugh. Puke. I'm trying to think of a counter post.

I'm still trying to get my head around what it's saying! Good luck with a counter, you must have a much stronger brain than I.

I think any random bullshit will do.

Oh rain, how you are the eye of my apple,

let's go out to ride, pedal to the metal.

How sweet the sound of the amazinG race,

just don't slide into a tree crashing your face.

 

Remember! Rain is wet!

 

WOW, this actually makes more sense than what he wrote.

[marmot]

The rain is beating down so faithfully, But My love is more faithful, you will see. The winds will show no mercy for your face, But your heart is safe, secure inside My grace. Hold on now it won't be too long.

 

Posted today from a friend. It's raining. WTF?

Ugh. Puke. I'm trying to think of a counter post.

I'm still trying to get my head around what it's saying! Good luck with a counter, you must have a much stronger brain than I.

 

I don't understand it either. Apparently I'm not fluent in Christianese anymore, which is a good thing.

[Requiem]

This one really fucking pisses me off...one of my cousin's wives posts this type of shit all the time, but this one is so full of fucking shit it just makes my blood boil. The fucked up punctuation and random capilizations are hers or whoever the originator was.

 

"Pay attention***Mary had a little lamb. His fleece was white as snow. And everywhere that Mary went. The Lamb was sure to go. He followed her to school each day. It was not even the rule. He made the children laugh and play, to have a lamb at school. And then the rules all changed one day, illegal it became; to bring the Lamb of God to school or even say his name. Every day got worse and worse. And days turned into years. Instead of hearing children laugh we heard gun shots and tears. What must we do to stop the crime thats in our schools today? Let's let the Lamb of God come back to school and teach our kids to PRAY!!! If you agree, please repost!"

 

This is pure horseshit. First of all there is no fucking law on the books that says kids cannot say the name of any deity or that they cannot talk to themselves in their heads and pretend they are talking to their ever-lovin' sky daddy. You can even carry the Turd of Gawd. It's just that they are not supposed to teach one religion...or any religion as fact, and since it is a state institution the schools cannot lead formal prayers since it would become a state sponsored religious practice. And this bitch KNOWS this! She's a fucking teacher! A fucking teacher who reposts this ill-punctuated and randomly capitalized drivel...that seems to declare that tears make some sort of sound!

 

Oh and I suppose getting on your knees and thinking thoughts to some nonexistent douche bag is going to change crime. Fucking lunacy! Pure FUCKING lunacy! And this is a teacher who opposes true science education. She would rather see children taught religion in their biology classes...someone who would love to see the flood taught in middle school and high school earth science classes. Any teacher who opposes true science education does not need to be a teacher. She'll just help fuck up another generation of kids with her fairytale biases and desire to indoctrinate.

 

And one other thing that really fucking pisses me off is the implication the xians are somehow persecuted right here in JesusLand USA. That notion is absurd in the extreme. BULLSHIT! I fucking call BULLSHIT!!! When a church of wackos can stand outside of a military person's funeral and scream "God hates fags!" I have a hard time believing that more moderate fundies are fucking persecuted. Go fuck yourselves you fucking titty babies. No one is taking away any of your freedoms. You are free to be just as stupid and willfully ignorant as you want to be. You're free to build The Cretin Dunce Museum...featuring humans kicking it with dinosaurs. You're free to scream "God hates fags!" You're free to set up your holiday displays. You're free to bitch about everyone who isn't you. You fucking modern day American xians have it good, so shut the fuck up. Claiming persecution is crying wolf. Assholes.

 

My wife unfriended her yesterday. Maybe I should follow her lead and have done with this idiot.

 

Your wife appears to be a wise women! Be happy with such a strong one! I mean emotionally!

[midniterider]

Here's today's:

 

Joyce Meyer Ministries

God has a good plan for your life. You haven't missed the boat and you aren't too late!

 

...............

 

What is interesting is his plan is indistinguishable from random chance.

[ConureDelSol]

According to a FB post today, we're all still doomed to live for eternity with fundies:

 

Here's the good news about "selling your soul to the devil" -- as long as you're on this earth, God will always be the highest bidder. No matter how far sideways you get, Jesus will always buy it back.

 

*gags*

[blackpudd1n]

According to a FB post today, we're all still doomed to live for eternity with fundies:

 

Here's the good news about "selling your soul to the devil" -- as long as you're on this earth, God will always be the highest bidder. No matter how far sideways you get, Jesus will always buy it back.

 

*gags*

 

UGH!!!

[notogod]

I would like to know just when it was that we remembered god first. When we burned women, men and children at the stake while calling them witches? When we could justify killing a doctor because he provided abortions. When we took land from the Indians for shinny beads and alcohol? When we beat and separated "slaves" from their families? When we spend millions of dollars on corrupt politics? When????. I can't recall reading about or living a period in US history when we were one with a god and there was no injustice or sin. Just tell me when this was a complete christian nation. Think very hard and tell me WHEN. And then PROVE it. I am so weary of christians who want to believe that this country was ever "one nation under god".

[midniterider]

I would like to know just when it was that we remembered god first. When we burned women, men and children at the stake while calling them witches? When we could justify killing a doctor because he provided abortions. When we took land from the Indians for shinny beads and alcohol? When we beat and separated "slaves" from their families? When we spend millions of dollars on corrupt politics? When????. I can't recall reading about or living a period in US history when we were one with a god and there was no injustice or sin. Just tell me when this was a complete christian nation. Think very hard and tell me WHEN. And then PROVE it. I am so weary of christians who want to believe that this country was ever "one nation under god".

 

Well, Christards are always saying America was built on Christian principles. :-) The Christian principles of hate, murder, war, deceit, fraud, theft, kidnapping....

[owen652]

This just in!! one of my fb friend's status today:

 

 

 

"In response to proposed bills be introduced into parliament today concerning GAY MARRIAGE ....

 

As a Christian, you should pray for the salvation of the homosexual the same as you would for any other person in sin. The homosexual is still made in the image of God -- even though he is in grave sin. Therefore, you should show him the same dignity as anyone else with whom you come in contact. However, this does not mean that you are to approve of his sin. Don't compromise your witness for a socially acceptable opinion that is void of godliness. Instead, stand firm in the truth that God has revealed, love him/her biblically, and pray for his salvation.

 

A Clear message for our politcians !"

[midniterider]

I finally found the unsubscribe function for individual FB friends and thus removed the daily ravings of Joyce Myers which one of my friends likes to post. It still keeps you friends but you can skip the drivel.

[blackpudd1n]

This just in!! one of my fb friend's status today:

 

 

 

"In response to proposed bills be introduced into parliament today concerning GAY MARRIAGE ....

 

As a Christian, you should pray for the salvation of the homosexual the same as you would for any other person in sin. The homosexual is still made in the image of God -- even though he is in grave sin. Therefore, you should show him the same dignity as anyone else with whom you come in contact. However, this does not mean that you are to approve of his sin. Don't compromise your witness for a socially acceptable opinion that is void of godliness. Instead, stand firm in the truth that God has revealed, love him/her biblically, and pray for his salvation.

 

A Clear message for our politcians !"

 

If I find this on my wall, I'm hitting back. My sister is against same-sex marriage. Found a poll on my wall one day where she voted that it shouldn't be allowed. I thought to myself, 'fuck you'. And voted that it should be allowed, for her and all her friends to see.

[Thought2Much]

I finally found the unsubscribe function for individual FB friends and thus removed the daily ravings of Joyce Myers which one of my friends likes to post. It still keeps you friends but you can skip the drivel.

 

I've used that for a loooooong time, and I'm thinking of blocking a few more people so I can keep my sanity. Funny thing is, I've blocked both Christians posting against AND people posting in favor of gay marriage, because both groups have just annoyed the hell out of me for the last couple of years.

[owen652]

This just in!! one of my fb friend's status today:

 

 

 

"In response to proposed bills be introduced into parliament today concerning GAY MARRIAGE ....

 

As a Christian, you should pray for the salvation of the homosexual the same as you would for any other person in sin. The homosexual is still made in the image of God -- even though he is in grave sin. Therefore, you should show him the same dignity as anyone else with whom you come in contact. However, this does not mean that you are to approve of his sin. Don't compromise your witness for a socially acceptable opinion that is void of godliness. Instead, stand firm in the truth that God has revealed, love him/her biblically, and pray for his salvation.

 

A Clear message for our politcians !"

 

If I find this on my wall, I'm hitting back. My sister is against same-sex marriage. Found a poll on my wall one day where she voted that it shouldn't be allowed. I thought to myself, 'fuck you'. And voted that it should be allowed, for her and all her friends to see.

 

oh, i hit back, don't you worry. i'm glad, because in the fundies' ignorant replies i could see them using the exact same arguments i used to use myself, which is pretty scary, but instructive. classic example: 'love the sinner, hate the sin.'

[London]

I would post back;

 

Millions of christians have prayed for many, many years for homosexuals to be saved and changed by god. Apparently prayer does not work since we still have homosexuals. God is not listening to the hateful prayers.

[owen652]

I would post back;

 

Millions of christians have prayed for many, many years for homosexuals to be saved and changed by god. Apparently prayer does not work since we still have homosexuals. God is not listening to the hateful prayers.

 

ha ha, that's a good one, i might try it. probably easier trying to convince a labradoodle though.

[London]

I like to throw their own words in their face. It angers them. And hopefully some of them think about it. You just need to crack the ice and eventually their house of cards will fall. Which is why they get so angry. It's hard to justify an outdated mythology.

[owen652]

I posted a few direct challenges to the scripture he was using to support his stance, but neither him nor his friends has addressed them at all. i used to work with this guy and it was interesting that although he was a Jesus freak, he was probably the most morally corrupt person i've ever come across; sleeping around, using incredibly vulgar language and being derogatory to women... in fact when i think of the worst examples of humanity i've come across in my life, they are invariably Christians. i honestly can't think of any non-Christians who were anywhere near as bad.

[London]

That has been my experience. Doing everything they claim others should not do. Completely dishonest. And ANGRY. Just unhappy angry people. The negativity radiating off of some of these people is just numbing.

And then they slip into that xian babble talk. I listened to two women on a public bus talk for about 30 minutes about nothing. Lot's of "praise jesus" and "oh the lord knows", but no real conversation. Chinese would have made more sense to me.

[Positivist]

This just in!! one of my fb friend's status today:

...As a Christian, you should pray for the salvation of the homosexual the same as you would for any other person in sin. The homosexual is still made in the image of God -- even though he is in grave sin. Therefore, you should show him the same dignity as anyone else with whom you come in contact. However, this does not mean that you are to approve of his sin. Don't compromise your witness for a socially acceptable opinion that is void of godliness. Instead, stand firm in the truth that God has revealed, love him/her biblically, and pray for his salvation.

This makes me want to cry. I am ashamed of my past involvement with fundamentalism.

[midniterider]

This just in!! one of my fb friend's status today:

 

 

 

"In response to proposed bills be introduced into parliament today concerning GAY MARRIAGE ....

 

As a Christian, you should pray for the salvation of the homosexual the same as you would for any other person in sin. The homosexual is still made in the image of God -- even though he is in grave sin. Therefore, you should show him the same dignity as anyone else with whom you come in contact. However, this does not mean that you are to approve of his sin. Don't compromise your witness for a socially acceptable opinion that is void of godliness. Instead, stand firm in the truth that God has revealed, love him/her biblically, and pray for his salvation.

 

A Clear message for our politcians !"

 

If I find this on my wall, I'm hitting back. My sister is against same-sex marriage. Found a poll on my wall one day where she voted that it shouldn't be allowed. I thought to myself, 'fuck you'. And voted that it should be allowed, for her and all her friends to see.

 

A facebook friend posted something about laws banning gay marriage being unconstitutional....the next friend posted how liberals are always screaming something is unconstitutional just because they dont like the religious point of view. He then went on a tirade about the USA 1st amendment to the constitution and how government can still hold onto religious principles even though the government can't respect any particular religion or recognize a national religion....and then the next day a judge declared California's proposition 8 banning gay marriage to be UNCONSTITUTIONAL...lol.