midniterider Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 Sunday Dispatch.8 “God, my God, omnipotent King, I humbly adore thee. Thou art King of kings, Lord of lords. Thou art the Judge of every age. Thou art the Redeemer of souls. Thou art the Liberator of those who believe. Thou art the Hope of those who toil. Thou art the Comforter of those in sorrow. Thou art the Way to those who wander. Thou art Master to the nations. Thou art the Creator of all creatures. Thou art the Lover of all good. Thou art the Prince of all virtues. Thou art the joy of all Thy saints. Thou art life perpetual. Thou art joy in truth. Thou art the exultation in the eternal fatherland. Thou art the Light of light. Thou art the Fountain of holiness. Thou art the glory of God the Father in the height. Thou art Savior of the world. Thou art the plenitude of the Holy Spirit. Thou sittest at the right hand of God the Father on the throne, reigning for ever.” ~ St. Patrick St. Patrick, the idiot. :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midniterider Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 Sunday Dispatch.8 “God, my God, omnipotent King, I humbly adore thee. Thou art King of kings, Lord of lords. Thou art the Judge of every age. Thou art the Redeemer of souls. Thou art the Liberator of those who believe. Thou art the Hope of those who toil. Thou art the Comforter of those in sorrow. Thou art the Way to those who wander. Thou art Master to the nations. Thou art the Creator of all creatures. Thou art the Lover of all good. Thou art the Prince of all virtues. Thou art the joy of all Thy saints. Thou art life perpetual. Thou art joy in truth. Thou art the exultation in the eternal fatherland. Thou art the Light of light. Thou art the Fountain of holiness. Thou art the glory of God the Father in the height. Thou art Savior of the world. Thou art the plenitude of the Holy Spirit. Thou sittest at the right hand of God the Father on the throne, reigning for ever.” ~ St. Patrick You know, in the real world I'm a teeny, tiny bit well known within certain circles. I sometimes get people fawning on me and telling me how frickin' marvelous I am. I appreciate that they care, but being gone on about like that embarrasses me. And even I -- a mere, insecure human with an ego -- know that no sane, well-balanced person needs that kind of unctious attention. So here's this perfect, immortal, all-knowing god who wants all us little bugs (microbes, atoms, whatever else you might compare us to when imagining a god's perspective) to do absolutely nothing other than fawn on him for all our lives and all eternity thereafter. In addition to all this monster's other faults -- his homicidal tendencies, his appreciation for incest and slavery, his failure to understand that pi isn't precisely three -- he's got the most amazingly insecure ego the universe could ever conceive. Why would an all powerful being want people to kiss his ass? I would not want an ant to sing praises to me. That's absurd. I'd rather the ants got on with their lives and I'll get on with mine. Though at least the ants can see me and know I'm really there. :-) Christians are praising some figment of their own imaginations. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roz Posted March 17, 2014 Share Posted March 17, 2014 Why would an all powerful being want people to kiss his ass? I would not want an ant to sing praises to me. That's absurd. I'd rather the ants got on with their lives and I'll get on with mine. Though at least the ants can see me and know I'm really there. :-) Christians are praising some figment of their own imaginations. Christians would argue that it's not for his benefit, but for ours. Our lives would be that much more fulfilled and complete if we were to kiss god's ass. Like Loki's terms for the people in the Avengers movie. Kneeling before god is our natural state! Is that not more simple? If only Loki would change his costume, he would easily control both muslim and christian. Found it, here we go. Looking back, it's the most fitting set of lines for any religion. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dapip0EHYMI Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WarriorPoet Posted March 18, 2014 Share Posted March 18, 2014 Why would an all powerful being want people to kiss his ass? I would not want an ant to sing praises to me. That's absurd. I'd rather the ants got on with their lives and I'll get on with mine. Though at least the ants can see me and know I'm really there. :-) Christians are praising some figment of their own imaginations. Christians would argue that it's not for his benefit, but for ours. Our lives would be that much more fulfilled and complete if we were to kiss god's ass. Like Loki's terms for the people in the Avengers movie. Kneeling before god is our natural state! Is that not more simple? If only Loki would change his costume, he would easily control both muslim and christian. Found it, here we go. Looking back, it's the most fitting set of lines for any religion. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dapip0EHYMI It is simple, isn't it? Not being responsible for your actions. How much easier would life be if you had carte blanche to say that your mistakes would be atoned for by someone else? Here's the deal, you are responsible for your mistakes. These mistakes result in consequences that allow you to learn how you screwed up. This also provides the benefit of allowing you to improve by learning from these lessons. We are our accomplishments and our failures. These things define us, beliefs in deities and their forgiveness or condemnation reduce the human experience to nothing more than an arbitrary test to determine if you meet some imaginary standard that only exists due to someone's interpretation of what scripture says. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator TheRedneckProfessor Posted March 23, 2014 Super Moderator Share Posted March 23, 2014 Even without the help of a non-existent god... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MerryG Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midniterider Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 Sunday Dispatch - 3-23-14 http://godisimaginary.com/i16.htm 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bhim Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 You know, if you guys don't like this thread, I did start my own. Just sayin'... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ironhorse Posted March 23, 2014 Author Share Posted March 23, 2014 Sunday Dispatch.9 "The Christians form among themselves secret societies that exists outside thesystem of laws , an obscure and mysterious community founded on revolt." ~Origen "They form a rabble of profane conspiracy. Their alliance consists in meeting at~Minucius Felex "The Christians boast that they blaspheme and strike the images of the gods."~(Celsus) "When a Christian passes through the temples he will spit down upon thesmoking altars. ~Tertullian They venerate an executed criminal and the gallows, thewooden cross on which he was executed." ~Felix Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 Sunday Dispatch.9 "The Christians form among themselves secret societies that exists outside the system of laws , an obscure and mysterious community founded on revolt." ~Origen "They form a rabble of profane conspiracy. Their alliance consists in meeting at ~Minucius Felex "The Christians boast that they blaspheme and strike the images of the gods." ~(Celsus) "When a Christian passes through the temples he will spit down upon the smoking altars. ~Tertullian They venerate an executed criminal and the gallows, the wooden cross on which he was executed." ~Felix Most people masturbate in private. Ironhorse why do you insist upon doing it here? 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roz Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 Sunday Dispatch.9 "They form a rabble of profane conspiracy. Their alliance consists in meeting at ~Minucius Felex Hmmmmm I guess Mr. Felex was raptured before he could finish his quote. Best of luck to him. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator TheRedneckProfessor Posted March 23, 2014 Super Moderator Share Posted March 23, 2014 Sunday Dispatch.9 "The Christians form among themselves secret societies that exists outside the system of laws , an obscure and mysterious community founded on revolt." ~Origen "They form a rabble of profane conspiracy. Their alliance consists in meeting at ~Minucius Felex "The Christians boast that they blaspheme and strike the images of the gods." ~(Celsus) "When a Christian passes through the temples he will spit down upon the smoking altars. ~Tertullian They venerate an executed criminal and the gallows, the wooden cross on which he was executed." ~Felix "christians have been a pain in everybody's ass since the very beginning." ~Ironhorse 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MerryG Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 Sunday Dispatch.9 "The Christians form among themselves secret societies that exists outside the system of laws , an obscure and mysterious community founded on revolt." ~Origen "They form a rabble of profane conspiracy. Their alliance consists in meeting at ~Minucius Felex "The Christians boast that they blaspheme and strike the images of the gods." ~(Celsus) "When a Christian passes through the temples he will spit down upon the smoking altars. ~Tertullian And now when anybody does any of those things, pious christians are the first to throw hissy fits about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midniterider Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 Sunday Dispatch.9 "The Christians form among themselves secret societies that exists outside the system of laws , an obscure and mysterious community founded on revolt." ~Origen "They form a rabble of profane conspiracy. Their alliance consists in meeting at ~Minucius Felex "The Christians boast that they blaspheme and strike the images of the gods." ~(Celsus) "When a Christian passes through the temples he will spit down upon the smoking altars. ~Tertullian They venerate an executed criminal and the gallows, the wooden cross on which he was executed." ~Felix I believe in Jesus again! Thank you Ironhorse. Just kidding. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midniterider Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 Sunday Dispatch.9 "They form a rabble of profane conspiracy. Their alliance consists in meeting at ~Minucius Felex Hmmmmm I guess Mr. Felex was raptured before he could finish his quote. Best of luck to him. meeting at Walmart. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MerryG Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 Sunday Dispatch.9 "They form a rabble of profane conspiracy. Their alliance consists in meeting at ~Minucius Felex Hmmmmm I guess Mr. Felex was raptured before he could finish his quote. Best of luck to him. meeting at Walmart. ... meeting at the casino, the bar, or the whorehouse when they think nobody's watching? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
par4dcourse Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 That shit must be true 'cause Felex the magic cat and that guy Celcus that invented the thermometer wouldn't lie. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MerryG Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 This comment by ironhorse ... http://www.ex-christian.net/topic/61476-sunday-disparage/#entry934672 And this response by xtify ... http://www.ex-christian.net/topic/61476-sunday-disparage/#entry934715 ... came up in Bhim's "Sunday Disparage" thread. I didn't want to respond over there because Bhim was pretty clearly trying to get away from the ironhorsery (ironhorsesassery?) of this thread by starting that one. But I think I've figured out what ironhorse thinks he's doing here. He's one of those christians who wants desperately to persuade people that christianity is hip and cool and relevant -- and maybe even a little revolutionary. And he's old enough to think that U2, Bob Dylan, and Winnie the Pooh (which, remember, underwent a huge revival and even got some avant garde attention in the late 1960s) are the latest in hipness, coolness, and relevance. He figures if he just shows us that Jesus -- and ironhorse -- are groovy we'll go back and get all psychedelic with them. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thereisnoperfect Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 This comment by ironhorse ... http://www.ex-christian.net/topic/61476-sunday-disparage/#entry934672 And this response by xtify ... http://www.ex-christian.net/topic/61476-sunday-disparage/#entry934715 ... came up in Bhim's "Sunday Disparage" thread. I didn't want to respond over there because Bhim was pretty clearly trying to get away from the ironhorsery (ironhorsesassery?) of this thread by starting that one. But I think I've figured out what ironhorse thinks he's doing here. He's one of those christians who wants desperately to persuade people that christianity is hip and cool and relevant -- and maybe even a little revolutionary. And he's old enough to think that U2, Bob Dylan, and Winnie the Pooh (which, remember, underwent a huge revival and even got some avant garde attention in the late 1960s) are the latest in hipness, coolness, and relevance. He figures if he just shows us that Jesus -- and ironhorse -- are groovy we'll go back and get all psychedelic with them. I was starting to suspect this too, especially when he jumped on the bandwagon to disparage Christian rock in favor of U2 and Bob Dylan, his personal favs. Ironhorse, if you're listening, we don't care. Back when I listened to Christian music I was very selective about it and managed to find the best stuff. Now that I don't have to, it's even easier because I can pick freely. With people who have never been Christian you might make some converts by surprising them with the variety of ways to be Christian--but we've already been backstage. We're not wowed by you putting a different act on stage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest afireinside Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 Happy Guy by NOFX He's just a man getting through life the best he can He's a not a scientist, he programs a computer Before that he sold cars to pay a student loan now he receives pity From his family - his friends say how could he Turn his back on reason worshipping A God finding truth through fear and mind control He's just a man trying to explain how He found the word of God could make his life seem less insane So he shares what he's read, what he understands, it makes Sense to him, it makes perfect sense to him, in fact He's never seen so clearly Turned his back on free will - has he lost his mind? He'd rather kneel down than take charge of his life And he knows what people think, but it doesn't sway him He can read the writings on the wall 'Cause he knows how people treat, how they treat each other A sacrifice to benefit the all Don't try to judge him, his theological ideas His hopes may be false but his happiness is real Don't try to judge him, he's just a man Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mydisplayname Posted March 25, 2014 Share Posted March 25, 2014 “There’s an invisible unicorn in my back yard that kills invisible babies and eats them. Do you hate it?” “No, because it doesn’t exist” “That’s how I feel about your god” – Anonymous I’m a polyatheist – there are many gods I don’t believe in. – Dan Fouts If it turns out that there is a God, I don’t think that he’s evil. But the worst that you can say about him is that basically he’s an underachiever. – Woody Allen Jesus hardly made the greatest sacrifice. He knew he would be resurrected anyway. – Anonymous Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pantophobia Posted March 25, 2014 Share Posted March 25, 2014 With people who have never been Christian you might make some converts by surprising them with the variety of ways to be Christian--but we've already been backstage. We're not wowed by you putting a different act on stage. Poor ironhorse. He's just doing what he's been taught. He's been assured that bearing witness and testifying and showing God's love is going to result in blessings! So he comes truckin' over here to Ex-Christian world, sure that if he just reminds us of a couple things, if he responds with just the right rhetoric, some of us, at least, will suddenly remember the glaaaawry of God's love and come running back to the church, and be all, "God bless you, ironhorse! Your amazing witnessing saved me! You are blessed among men!" And he can feel all proud of himself. He can have his beliefs validated that way. But all of the things ironhorse has been taught about going out and ministering is proven false here, time and again, because of what therisnoperfect and others have said. You can't put the genie back in the bottle. You can't re-believe in Santa. Once you've taken apart the magic kaleidoscope and seen that it's just a jumble of bits and mirrors, you can't re-experience the innocent wonder and belief in what you see. Or, as they say in the South, "Bless your heart!" Since he seems to think a few pop-culture references and quotes from lyrics will work, here: Dear God, sorry to disturb you, but I feel that I should be heard loud and clear. We all need a big reduction in amount of tears and all the people that you made in your image, see them fighting in the street 'cause they can't make opinions meet about God, I can't believe in you Did you make disease, and the diamond blue? Did you make mankind after we made you? And the devil too? Dear God, don't know if you noticed, but your name is on a lot of quotes in this book, and us crazy humans wrote it, you should take a look, and all the people that you made in your image still believing that junk is true. Well I know it ain't, and so do you, dear God, I can't believe in I don't believe in I won't believe in heaven and hell. No saints, no sinners, no devil as well. No pearly gates, no thorny crown. You're always letting us humans down. The wars you bring, the babes you drown. Those lost at sea and never found, and it's the same the whole world 'round. The hurt I see helps to compound that Father, Son and Holy Ghost is just somebody's unholy hoax, and if you're up there you'd perceive that my heart's here upon my sleeve. If there's one thing I don't believe in it's you.... Dear God. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
par4dcourse Posted March 25, 2014 Share Posted March 25, 2014 He's one of those christians who wants desperately to persuade people that christianity is hip and cool and relevant -- and maybe even a little revolutionary. And he's old enough to think that U2, Bob Dylan, and Winnie the Pooh (which, remember, underwent a huge revival and even got some avant garde attention in the late 1960s) are the latest in hipness, coolness, and relevance. He figures if he just shows us that Jesus -- and ironhorse -- are groovy we'll go back and get all psychedelic with them. I agree. Maybe groovy, hip Jesus can persuade us where pincushion jesus can't. Jesus was a Capricorn He ate organic food He believed in love and peace And never wore no shoes Long hair, beard and sandles And a funky bunch of friends Reckon we'd just nail him up If he came down again--Kris Kristofferson Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator TheRedneckProfessor Posted March 25, 2014 Super Moderator Share Posted March 25, 2014 So maybe we'll get to watch "jesus christ Superstar" for next week's Sunday Dispatch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mydisplayname Posted March 26, 2014 Share Posted March 26, 2014 With people who have never been Christian you might make some converts by surprising them with the variety of ways to be Christian--but we've already been backstage. We're not wowed by you putting a different act on stage. Poor ironhorse. He's just doing what he's been taught. He's been assured that bearing witness and testifying and showing God's love is going to result in blessings! So he comes truckin' over here to Ex-Christian world, sure that if he just reminds us of a couple things, if he responds with just the right rhetoric, some of us, at least, will suddenly remember the glaaaawry of God's love and come running back to the church, and be all, "God bless you, ironhorse! Your amazing witnessing saved me! You are blessed among men!" And he can feel all proud of himself. He can have his beliefs validated that way. But all of the things ironhorse has been taught about going out and ministering is proven false here, time and again, because of what therisnoperfect and others have said. You can't put the genie back in the bottle. You can't re-believe in Santa. Once you've taken apart the magic kaleidoscope and seen that it's just a jumble of bits and mirrors, you can't re-experience the innocent wonder and belief in what you see. Or, as they say in the South, "Bless your heart!" Since he seems to think a few pop-culture references and quotes from lyrics will work, here: Dear God, sorry to disturb you, but I feel that I should be heard loud and clear. We all need a big reduction in amount of tears and all the people that you made in your image, see them fighting in the street 'cause they can't make opinions meet about God, I can't believe in you Did you make disease, and the diamond blue? Did you make mankind after we made you? And the devil too? Dear God, don't know if you noticed, but your name is on a lot of quotes in this book, and us crazy humans wrote it, you should take a look, and all the people that you made in your image still believing that junk is true. Well I know it ain't, and so do you, dear God, I can't believe in I don't believe in I won't believe in heaven and hell. No saints, no sinners, no devil as well. No pearly gates, no thorny crown. You're always letting us humans down. The wars you bring, the babes you drown. Those lost at sea and never found, and it's the same the whole world 'round. The hurt I see helps to compound that Father, Son and Holy Ghost is just somebody's unholy hoax, and if you're up there you'd perceive that my heart's here upon my sleeve. If there's one thing I don't believe in it's you.... Dear God. This song by xtc is one of my all time favourites. Listen to it on youtube. There's a lot of emotion in it. edit because link 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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